CHAPTER FOURTEEN: THE STORY OF HIS IMPERFECTIONS

Thirdy

I MET Dani in a political party held in one of my family's mansion. Nagpa-plano pa lang na tumakbo noon ang tatay ko sa presidential position. And the people around us that night were his self-proclaimed allies. Kasama doon ang tatay ni Dani na si Congressman Garduce na anak ng naging campaign manager ni Lolo noon. Our family were somehow interconnected, making for us to get closer without facing any problems.

Dani was former model, businesswoman and thought leader of our age. Maraming nagsasabi na susunod siya sa yapak ng kanyang tatay na tingin ko'y magsisimula na. Ako lang naman ang nasa political party na walang ka-plano-plano na tumakbo sa kahit anong posisyon sa gobyerno. Simply because I don't want my hands get dirty in the game of power, connections and money.

Kuntento na ako sa pagiging abogado ko at alam rin naman ng mga magulang ko na wala talaga akong balak tumakbo. Kuya Clarence may have because he embodied Daddy from the way he articulately said his speech down to his plans in life. Sigurado na siya sa lahat kaya hanga ako sa kanya at kaya rin ako abogado ngayon iyon ay dahil sa aking kapatid.

“Third, aren't going to mingle with those woman who's definitely want to try checking you out?” tanong ni Kuya sa akin.

Tumingin ako sa tinutukoy niya at nakita ko na sa akin nga sila nakatingin. “I have no time for that. This is what I need to prioritize now, Kuya,” I said, waiving a book reviewer for my entrance exam at Oxford Law.

“Doctor of Juridical Science. . . hindi ka pa ba kuntento sa Master of Laws at Juris Doctor degree mo?”

“Hindi pa.” Umiling si Kuya at tinapik-tapik ang balikat ko bago nagpaalam na may lalapitang kakilala.

The truth is I don't need any degrees or an office in the government. With or without those, I'm still the fourth son of the aspiring president of this country. Dad gave me not only his surname but also his name. Sabi niya ako daw ang anak niyang susunod sa yapak nila ni Lolo pero nagkamali siya.

Hindi ako iyon at ang gusto ko lang ay tahimik na buhay.

Luminga-linga ako sa paligid, naghahanap ng maaaring puwestuhan na tahimik kaso wala yata noon dito.

Huminga ako ng malalim at aktong magbabasa na ngunit isang malamyos na tinig ang pumukaw sa akin.

“Did you know that a normal guy won't bring a reviewer in this kind of party?” tanong ng parehong tinig na aking narinig. In front of me is a goddess. She's beautiful yet mystery were all over her eyes, making wanted to know more about this lady. “I'm Danielle Garduce and you are?”

Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya na tila ba kinakabisa ko ang bawat detalye ng kanyang mukha. I've seen her before. Ngayon lang nagkrus ang landas naming dalawa at siya pa ang unang lumapit sa akin.

“Are you done staring?” Dani asked.

“I'm Thirdy. Thirdy De Luna.”

“Hmm. . . the wonder child of Senator Matthias De Luna. . .”

“Yes. . . that's me.”

“Do you want to go out with me?”

That question doesn't sound in general. Itvis as if she wanted me alone. Dani asked me out because out of all the people around us, I maybe piqued her interest. Sino nga bang lalaki ang magdadala ng reviewer sa isang private party na gaya nito?

Ako lang dahil mas priority ko ang makakuha ng degree kaysa makihalubilo sa iba. I'm here for the sake of good pictures with my family. And I bet my other siblings except Kuya Clarence shared the same feelings with me. I cannot see Ellis and Noelle around while Kuya JD is busy chatting with his wife - maybe it's about medical terminologies only them can understand.

“Traditional man.”

Kumunot ang noo ko at muling napatingin kay Dani.

“What?”

She chuckled. “You are a traditional man, Thirdy. Hindi ka sanay na babae ang nauuna mag-approach, right?” Whoa, she got me there. Hindi ko alam kung paano pero tama siya. “I guess. . . I'll see you around. Ituloy mo na ang pagbabasa mo. But here is my number. Call me.” Dani winked before leaving me all alone again.

Danielle Marie Garduce
Chief Executive - Garduce Oriental Medicine

There, I said to myself, this Danielle Marie Garduce is provocative kind of woman.

DAYS became weeks then months. Busy ako sa trabaho, sa pag-aaral at sa kung ano-ano pa at ngayon lang napahinga. I'm here at the cafe near the law firm, reading and digesting details from the book I'm holding.

“Is this seat still open?” tanong na pumukaw sa aking pagbabasa. Nag-angat ako ng tingin at iyong mukha agad ni Dani ang sumalubong sa akin. I look straight into her eyes, trying to read her mind but in the I failed. “Uupo na ako, ha?”

She did as what she say and I didn't opposed.

“Why are you here? Sinusundan mo ba ako?”

“You maybe special but nope I'm not following you. Sinamahan ko si Papa at binisita niya ang private office ni Senator De Luna. You know election thing?”

Natuloy si Dad sa plano at lahat kami'y naghahanda na. Patunay iyong paghigpit ng security details naming magkakapatid. I have my three minions outside and they're quite alarmed when this woman in disguise approached me. Sumenyas lang ako na ayos na ang lahat para kumalma silang tatlo.

“Yeah, election. . .” I stretch my legs underneath the table as well as my arms. Nagulat ako ng kuhain ni Dani iyong libro na binabasa ko.

“Civil law. . . Alam mo sinubukan ko na maging lawyer. Kaso first year pa lang sumuko na ako. But here you are after obtaining juris doctor and master of laws, you're aiming to achieve another degree at Oxford. Interesting.”

“Are you spying at me?”

“Gwapo ka pero hindi para mag-spy ako sa 'yon. You're all over the internet, Attorney.”

“So you're spying me.”

“Hindi nga.”

Tumawa ako. “I'm free. You can take me out today.”

“Okay.”

Sumama ako kay Dani at sa penthouse niya kami nagpuntang dalawa. Hindi ko alam paanong nangyari na napapayag niya ako gayong 'di ko ugali na sumama sa babae. I can say that Dani is exceptional.

When we entered her penthouse, I immediately bridge the space between us. But before I completely touch her face she held my hand and steal the first to me. We kissed in way that earthy hunger arise more than connection and compatibility.

Si Dani ang kumilos at iyong mga kamay ko'y hindi niya hinahayaan na dumapo sa kanya. Para bang may iniiwasan siya at hindi ako komportable. But that very moment, Dani overpowered me in bed, prioritizing her needs more than mine.

Pagkatapos namin, nakita ko na mabilis siyang nagbibihis ng mga nahubad na damit. Habang ako'y nasa kama pa, nakahiga at nakatingin lang sa kanya.

“You should be dressing up now, Attorney. I have no plans of staying in bed for long.”

My groan grows hoarsely. “Did you just used me?”

Humarap siya sa akin saka malawak na ngumiti. “Maybe? But we're just starting. I want more of you but we have to write down a contract.”

“Why do we need a contract?”

“To serve as our protection? Alam mo dapat iyan kasi abogado ka. Saka isa pa, hindi ako mahilig sa romantikong mga bagay. I don't cuddle, kiss passionately or tell story how I orgasms intensely after sex.”

Bumangon ako at tumingin sa kanya. “What made you like that?”

Ngumiti siya. “I'm not going to tell you my story either, Thirdy. So, itutuloy ba natin o huwag na lang?”

Ilang saglit pa ako na tumingin sa kanya dahil hindi malaman ang sasabihin. Ngunit bandang huli ay pumayag rin ako. And I think that's the greatest mistake I made, creating memories that I will never forget. . .

LIKE I SAID, agreeing to the kind of relationship Dani wanted is something I didn't expected. Akala ko siya lang iyong klase ng babaeng mahilig sa kakaibang bagay kapag nakikipag-sex. Tinanggap ko iyon at unti-unti niya akong isinama sa mundo na mahirap para sa akin na intindihin. And there I found myself being submissive to her as the dominant of the agreement we had.

Bondage was there. It's always there actually and she liked it. But as our relationship - I wouldn't call it a relationship now - went deeper her needs and wants became wildest. She introduce me to some sexual acts that leave trauma, not only to my body but also to my brain. I found myself one day disoriented when she left without a word. Parusa ko raw iyon kasi lumabag ako sa rules niya.

At rules na nilabag ko ay iyong pagmamahal ko sa kanya. I loved her even if she's fucked up inside.

The world continue revolving but mine stopped the day she left. I tried to re-focus my brain but everytime I engaged myself to any sexual activities, I'm looking for the pain, asking those women to hurt me, used me and humiliated me in their own way.

Tumingin ako kay Jeni na nakaupo pa din sa jacuzzi tub at matamang nakatingin sa akin. Nagdesisyon ako na alisin ang suot ko na damit para ipakita sa kanya ang peklat na nagpapaalala sa akin kay Dani.

I called it Dani's marks.

“Oh my God. . .” Jeni exclaimed upon seeing those scars. I couldn't stand her stare so I turned my back off, showing the huge flogging scars there. “G-ginawa niya ito. . . lahat?”

Napapikit ako ng maramdaman ang kamay ni Jeni sa aking likod. There are times that I felt it itching. Kapag kinamot ko tuloy-tuloy hanggang sa dumugo pero wala akong nararamdaman na sakit.

“Yes and that's the reason I cannot fuck you yet. I'm still under the observation of a psychologist who refused to give back my permit to work in court or cater a client. Binawalan pa rin niya ako na makipag-sex at ituloy lang ang gamot ko.”

“Thirdy. . .”

“Don't pity. I chose that and I have to bare this memory.”

“I'm not. . . going to do that.” Lumingon ako sa kanya ng maramdaman ko ang kanyang yakap. “Hindi ako perpekto at ayoko rin na kinaaawaan ng kahit na sino...”