✧

I thought healing from my wounds of the attack would hurt more than this.

My heart aches inside my chest and my wolf cries at the top of her lungs. I slump against my bed sheets and curl up into a ball. Every time I close my eyes I see those silver eyes staring back at me and the roughness of the ground as they pulled me away.

I shudder. How could my wolf want someone so vicious?

We should give him a chance. I hear her persuasion.

He wanted to take me away. He wanted to steal me from my family.

That is not how you treat your mate. I've seen Nate and Milo together, even Elin and Zade. Their love is deep and honest. It's all I've ever wanted. So how have I ended up with a mate who doesn't respect my wishes?

It's been over a week and I've been moping about because of my wolf. All of my emotions are heightened now we've had a whiff of his scent and I know what his touch feels like. I don't want it. I don't want to remember it.

I hoped it was a dream and that I'd wake up any second. But no. It's my reality.

After tossing and turning in my bed I decide to get up for the day before I rot between my sheets. I head downstairs to find Imogen poking her head into Leon's office, our Alpha.

"There is a lone wolf that is walking around our perimeter," she states and the hairs on my arms begin to stand. "The wolves on duty thought he went away but he's come back. Not even in his wolf form but his human form, we're unsure of what he wants."

My throat tenses and the goosebumps on my arms intensify. A non-existent breeze brushes my neck and I press my fingers to the skin. I glance over my shoulder as if someone has whispered something in my ear.

Oh Goddess. I shake my head and walk towards the office as they decide a plan amongst them. I stand in the doorway as my brother talks with our father, Leon and Imogen. My eyes widen at their determined eyes and focused expressions.

Nate glances at me. "You okay?"

I tug my cardigan downwards. "I-I know who it is."

"Who, who is it?" He demands.

My lungs widen to take down as much air as possible. "The wolf that approaches the house. This is his third time coming." I admit shakily.

Nate walks towards me and rests his arms on my shoulders, his face struck with concern. He doesn't ask who I mean, he already knows as he searches my eyes to make sure that I'm okay, but I don't think I am.

I have no idea anymore. My head aches.

He looks to Imogen as his jaw tenses to the point it cracks. "Let me end this motherfucker."

"Don't hurt him," I say desperately, latching onto his wrist to stop him from walking away. My other hand grips over my heart. "It will hurt me, it will destroy me."

My wolf winces inside and I don't even want to think about the outcome of being mated to a dead wolf. I'll never survive it. We've all heard the stories. If anything our father is a perfect example–he's not the man he used to be.

Nate's nostrils flare and he shakes his head once but I plead with him silently.

"Okay. I won't." He grunts.

But for a second I don't believe him. I know what he can be like. He's protective to all of his family members and Milo. He wouldn't hesitate to snap my mate's neck.

"Promise," I grip onto him tighter. "Promise me you won't. It hurts already and I won't manage the heartbreak."

Inside I'm quivering at the thought of having my heart ripped out of my chest. The loneliness. The depression. The emptiness. I'll break and I'll never be the same as I was, even if I can't see myself being with someone as reckless as him.

Nate nods eventually and I take a breath. "Stay here," he demands.

"I'll stay with her," Imogen says as she steps to my side.

I watch Nate, Elin and Zade leave and my heart is in my throat. My fingers play with the hem of my cardigan anxiously. What if something goes wrong? What if they end up hurting him?

My chest constricts and for a moment I lose my breath. "It's okay," Imogen reassures me.

"It's him," I murmur as I walk towards the kitchen. "He's been here before. It's me he wants to see."

Imogen's eyes soften for a second. "Nate will sort him out. He won't hurt you. The guards won't allow him to get any closer. Trust this pack, okay? He's not going to lay a finger on you."

I chew on my lip in anticipation. But if I speak to him for a moment, he might eventually go away. He wants me and he's going to keep coming back. Maybe I need to put an end to this–despite my wolf eager to give him the benefit of the doubt.

"I want to go out there," I murmur. "See what he really wants."

Imogen sighs. "We know what he wants, Vi."

"He's my mate," I roll my shoulders. "I get to call the shots."

Without looking back I stroll out of the backdoor and head towards the trees. I follow my wolf's senses and the heavy intensity of the goosebumps on my arm. The closer I inch towards him, the louder my wolf howls.

I spot the back of Nate, Elin and Zade's heads in the distance.

My wolf senses his scent before I see him, but when I do I pause and everything around me stops for a few seconds. I'm wrapped up in his woody scent that is sprinkled with a little bit of spice, something that makes my tongue turn dry.

I've only ever seen his wolf form. I've never seen his face.

I pause to take in the sight of him from afar.

He's wearing a dark jumper with a hood set over his head, mostly covering his face. He's tall. As tall as my brother and that's saying something. I swallow back the lump in my throat as he tilts his head an inch and I spot his gleaming silver eyes.

Holy shit. They're not just a feature for his wolf. They're a part of his human form too.

They gleam against the sunlight. Hauntingly beautiful. So silver they almost look white.

My brother's head whips in our direction, finally sensing us. His face blows up with pure anger but that doesn't stop me from walking towards him. Every step I take is a little shaky, but I refuse to show my fear.

"Let us talk... alone." My mate's voice bellows across the trees and my head explodes.

Our eyes meet and I spot the curl of a smirk on his lips. I freeze at the sight of him. Broad shoulders, thick thighs. I glance down at his hands that peek out the end of his jumper to find rings across his knuckles and tattoos on his fingers.

"Over my dead body," Nate growls at him.

I flick my gaze to his face once more and he tilts his head in my direction. "Don't you want to talk to me, sweetness?"

My heart stalls at the nickname. His eyes don't leave mine. Not for a second.

Nate's shoulders vibrate. "You have five seconds to leave, otherwise I'll rip you to shreds."

"I'll only keep coming back. All I want is a conversation. That's it."

His deep voice wraps around my soul like dark chocolate and whisky. It's rough around the edges but it's like a harmony I've been waiting to hear for my entire life. I wrap my arms around myself–attempting to shield my emotions but with his eyes, it's like he can see right through me.

"I don't trust you," Nate snarls.

My mate releases a chilling breath and nods. "Wise."

I shiver at his simple answer but it tells me everything I need to know–yet my heart is still yearning for him like a love-sick puppy.

"Leave." My brother demands.

He looks at me again and takes his time as he drags his eyes over my face and down my body. In this moment I feel tiny compared to him–tiny compared to everyone. This isn't how I wanted this situation to play out. I don't want to be looked upon as the weak mate, but right now I know I'm out of my depth.

"I'll be back," he flashes me a quick smirk. I get an eyeful of his sharp jawline and tattoos peeking out from beneath his jumper, ink coating his neck.

When he starts walking away a sinking feeling erupts in my sternum. I stare at the back of his head as he disappears behind the trees. I finally take a breath, but I feel incredibly underwhelmed by the whole experience.

"Come on," Nate beckons me back to the house but I don't move. I continue staring at the spot he was standing. "Viola."

"I would have spoken to him," I murmur, glancing at my brother. "Try to understand him better."

Nate physically flinches from my words. "He hurt you, Vi. He was vicious and he dragged you through the dirt. He was trying to attack us. We can't trust him, the mate bond will make you believe what you want to believe. He could take advantage of you. I know you want to get to know him, that you want to settle your wolf. But you can't trust him."

His harsh syllables make my brows pinch together. I turn and walk back to the house, arms still folded over my chest and my eyes are firmly on the ground. "We should tell Leon to keep our security high. Try and warn him away, you shouldn't meet him by yourself, Viola. You are smarter than that."

"So, you get to have your happy ending but I don't?" I snap out of nowhere. "You get to spend your time with Milo, like I can't hear you laughing and talking and enjoying each other through the walls."

My insides begin to turn into cement, weighing me down. He might not be the ideal mate but does that mean I just give up on him? That I have to live the rest of my life sad and alone because he isn't my idea of perfect.

"Vi," he calls out to me. "You know that's not where I am going with this."

My teeth crack against one another as I stare up at him with new found irritation. "You don't get to dictate my life, Nate. Just because mum isn't here, doesn't mean you can boss me around and make decisions for me. This is my life and I'm allowed to do whatever I want!"

The roaring fire inside me keeps on burning and I know a lot of these internalised thoughts are from my projecting wolf. But I still believe my words. Nate has always been incredibly overbearing and protective and now I want to live my life on my own terms.

Even if I make mistakes. How will I ever learn if he holds my hand the entire way?

"I'm trying to look out for you. I don't want anything to happen to you. It is my biggest fear."

My head shakes once. "It's still my choice to make."

Nate's eyes harden and I know he's battling with himself. "Alright. You do what you want, Viola. I'm sorry that I'm trying to be a good brother and protect you from someone I think could take your kindness and use it for their own benefit."

People might think I'm naive and innocent and too kind for this world. But I can think for myself.

I don't look at him as I continue to walk ahead with my eyes down.

My wolf has convinced me he deserves a chance to explain and then I can make my final decision. I'll never forgive myself if I let this chance slip. To never know what it's like to have a true mate.

✧

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Author's Note

Eeeekkkk. We get to meet him in the flesh👀

I love the idea of his silver eyes and the fact he's a big boy who's tall hahah, for reference Nate is 6'4

What did you guys think of this chapter?👉🏼

I've been planning out the book and honestly my heart has never hurt as much as imagining the scenes I want to write. IT'S GOING TO HURTTTTTTTT

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Love Savanna x

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