"Lea. Leave m..my ha..nd, unc...le," I mumbled as tears rolled down my eyes. I'm scared.

"Ahhhh! Aaaahh! Ma!" I screamed as I felt pain with that something shoving into my private part.

"Shut up, girl. Let me enjoy and another one is waiting outside, already. Stop struggling."

I ran away from the hell showing the knife to the two men. I ran away as fast as possible. As the road is a desert area, I found no one to call. I ran away to my home, it is 15 minutes away from here. I ran fast lest they find me.

"What? What are you looking at? Just Go and DIE for god's sake. I'll be happy."

I woke up, sitting on my bed breathless all of a sudden and looked around me. I'm still in my room. I'm still in my home. I'm still in my bed. Maybe, whatever that happened with me was just a dream, just maybe. And then, I took a deep breath assuming that it must be my dream, a bad dream. But, then as my gaze fell on my nightdress and my attention went towards the slight pain I'm getting. It's still hurting, little less now. So, this was true. Whatever that happened to me, that was true! I'm still hurt. I don't know if this pain will go away, ever. I just don't know. I'm a girl who has the confidence that whatever I do, it has a purpose. I know that. I'm optimistic in nature. But, considering the situation I'm in now, I'm more hurt with the fact, not having the knowledge of what I'm doing, whether it's right or wrong is more hurting. The confusion, the pain and the lack of confidence, this is hurting me too much. I closed my eyes as tears rolled my hazelnuts, and then I had to open my eyes. The same scenario is filming in front of my eyes as I closed them. As I opened my eyes, the same event in dancing in front of my eyes. What to do? Close them or open them? If I'm closing my eyes, the same hurt, the same pain comes in front of me. If I'm opening my eyes, again, the same pain, the same hurt comes standing in front of me, slapping it on my face that it is my fate. It is my truth. What to do? Sleep or never sleep? I don't know. How do I live this life? It's hurting. I can't sleep. I can't be awake. What to do with my life now? What? As I acknowledged the fact, I can't help but sob more. My body shook with my cries. Crying for the helpless state I'm in. What if I tell about this to anyone? What will they think? Won't they sympathize with me? What if they will stop my school? Why if they look at me with disgust? No! What if they consider me mental? Would they send me asylum? I can't tell them about today's incident anyway, and now I can not even tell them about this dream? Even if I tell them, would they believe me? Everyone may think I went to another side of the area. Even if I tell them, what do I reason with them? What? I can never share this with anyone, ever. What to do? Be Silent? Yes, just be silent. Bear this. But, why do I have to bear this? Is it my fault? What was my fault? Whose fault is this? I don't know. I don't have any idea about it. I'm just so confused, scared and hurt. I don't know anything.

"Ahhhh! Aaaahh! Ma!" I screamed as I felt pain with that something shoving into my private part.

What's happening again, why I'm hearing those voices? Why? Why is it happening to me? No! No! Just go away. Go away. I don't want to hear this. I don't. Just go away.

"Shut up, girl. Let me enjoy and another one is waiting outside, already. Stop struggling."

"Aahhhhh!" I tried to scream, even then I couldn't. My throat is choked up. I couldn't gulp down the lump, can not even release it. It's just stuck at my throat. What to do? My throat dried up. I can't talk. I can't even breath now. What to do? I just can't. I can not control myself. What is happening to me? W...what? What's that? I don't know.

"What? What are you looking at? Just Go and DIE for god's sake. I'll be happy."

"Ahhhh! Aaaahh! Ma!" I screamed as I felt pain with that something shoving into my private part.

God! Stop this! Just stop it. I don't want to hear them. I don't want to. I can't hear that. I just can't. It's hurting. Hurting like hell. I don't know, please make it stop, Jesus. Stop this. Stop. Stop. Stop. I couldn't breathe. I can't. Make this stop, please. Please. Please. Please.

I cried more as it won't stop. The Echoes. I can hear it from every corner of my room. I closed my ears, not able to hear anymore. My head is going to blast, I guess. It's hurting like hell. I clutched my head leaving my ears. And then again, I'm hearing the same voices. What to do? Close my ears or hold my head? What should I do? I don't know. But, if I know anything, that is I'm hurting, very much. I'm suffering from the horrible pain. All I want to do is, go and land in a world where is no one to hurt me, just me and my plants. That would be the best, right? What should I do to reach that land? Why I'm getting hurt? Is the fault mine? But I didn't hurt anyone, even the rose. Why is it happening to me? What did I do to deserve this? What? Jesus, I even come to church every Sunday. Why did you do this to me? Am I that bad? Why? Just why? Take me away from this pain. Take me away. Please. Just, please.

"Ma!" I cried more, but my dried-up- throat, it didn't let me make a sound. No one is there to comfort me. No one! Why? Just why God?

Just then, I heard a knock on the door. It is getting louder. I wiped away my tears and got down from the bed. I slightly limped towards the mirror at the side. I looked into the mirror and adjusted myself to look presentable.

The knocks are getting louder. I limped up to the door and opened it for another person to enter. Without even looking at who is it, I went to the washroom trying hard to walk normal, and failing miserably. I washed my face as I entered the washroom. I erased every trace of any distress. After all, I have to hide everything from my family. I have to and I have no other way. After looking at myself in the small mirror, making sure I was presentable, I went outside my room. Thanks to Lord, I've no nails or else after hurting myself, my body would have been covered with scratches, right? Maybe, that's why it didn't make him the difference when I scratched him. Whatever marks he gave me, it's covered with my nightdress. As I remembered about him, my eyes turned moist. No, don't. Just don't. Don't let my tears fall. Don't. And I was successful in that. I didn't let them fall. From when I started to control my tears? I don't know. And the marks, what if someone notices? What should I tell them? I don't know. And what's the time it is? When did I sleep? 8:30 PM, right? What's the time, now? How much did I sleep?

I walked outside with a slight limp, only to look at the room lit in light. There sat my mother on my bed. Her back was facing me. She wore a silk saree. And I noticed it's colour. Why can't I feel enthusiastic about looking at my favourite colour? I love colours, ain't I? I love the light. For the first time in my life, I didn't like this light. Why? No, I didn't like it. The Light falling on me. What happened to me? I like lights, right? I hate darkness, ain't I? Why do I want to go into darkness? When I know I'm scared of the dark? Why? I try to be under the light, always. What changed now? I don't want anyone to see me. I am feeling uncomfortable to even look at my Mom. She is my mother, isn't she? How can I feel uncomfortable under her gaze? How can I feel discomfort under her presence? She was the one to comfort me always, wasn't she? Was? When did it become past tense? Why do I feel like I don't want to look into my mother's eyes anymore? Am I hiding me from her? Why? What're these new feelings? I'm getting scared. I'm vulnerable. More than ever. I don't know how to behave anymore. I don't know. As I stood in front of my mother, after limping towards her. If only anyone notices my walk closely, they will get to know I'm limping. With the decreased pain, I have a slight limp which can not be noticed by anyone. If only they take a closer look, they will get to know I'm limping.

My Mom was looking at my notebooks as I looked at her. She didn't notice my presence. Neither the washroom door made any voice to indicate her of my arrival nor I have any anklets around my ankle to indicate her of my presence. She is lost in looking at my homework, also the paintings I made in the other drawing book. I don't know how to face her? How? I feel ashamed, disgusted and I don't know what to name other unknown feelings? How is my life going to be from here on? I don't know. I don't what happened to me. I don't know what will happen to me. I don't know what is happening to me. Why? Why this much confusion and pain?

No knowledge about the past. No confidence in my present. No courage about the future.

If this is how my life would be, why did I even born? Mom was right! It was better I never took the birth. It's hurting me so much. The dreams, what about it? How to avoid it? Can't I have a peaceful sleep, ever? Can't I? I don't know.

"Mom," I called out to my mother as she kept looking at my drawing. I went near her and looked at the drawing. It was a happy family. I draw it. A painting of Mother, Father, Brother and me. I looked at my mother as she has tears in her eyes. Why? Why is she crying? Was she crying looking at the picture? I have drawn it because we have no family photo like that. Was it hurting Mom?

My mother stood and strolled toward me.

"Mom," I questioned her looking at her with my dry orbs. As if there's no emotion present there. The emotion is missing from my eyes, the emotion which comes whenever I look at my mother. Why? Is it called indifference? But, it was never there before. Why I'm getting introduced to new emotions? The emotions which are doing nothing but hurting me, giving me a negative vibe. I wouldn't lose my family, right? They won't throw me out, right? Or will they? What if my family throws me out? Where would I go? No, I won't go anywhere. I have to feel everything except pain. But, is that possible? I don't know. So, I forced a smile at my mother as she looked at me.

She hugged me. Why is she hugging me? Why do I feel uncomfortable? Why? She is my mother, right? Why it's hurting? Why do I feel like just break the hug and tell her to never touch me? But, she is the woman who gave birth to me. She has the right to touch me, right? Why it's becoming more difficult. I can't breathe. The only thing I can remember is his disgusting touch, the dirty touches and the pain. Erase it, Adiya. Just erase it. Just like when you do a mistake with a pencil, you will erase it with rubber, don't you? Just erase. I closed my eyes in my mother's embrace as if to erase everything from her memory. But, it is a memory, after all. A horrible memory. How can I erase that? How? I don't know. I just don't anyone to look at me. I just don't want anyone to touch me. Wasn't I the one who went to her for the comfort? Why it's so complicated now? Why am I feeling this way? This....Whatever is this called? I'm not liking it. I needed my mother's warmth and when I'm getting the one, Why I want to resist it? Why? God, what are you playing at? Why me? Why? Not knowing that it was the first symptom of PTSD. Resisting the love and comfort is one of the symptom PTSD. Could she blame herself? No! This is not her fault after all.

"Mom!" I mumbled weakly overwhelmed with the emotions.

"What? What are you looking at? Just Go and DIE for god's sake. I'll be happy."

She wished for me to die. Why did she say that? When I needed her comfort, but what if she really comforted when I needed it? Would I have been accepting her embrace? Maybe No or Maybe Yes. I don't know. But, after whatever she said, I don't know I don't have that courage anymore.

"Adina," I heard my mom mumbling my name.

"I'm so sorry to say something like that, dear. I was very furious that I didn't even realise what the crap I told you off." My mother released me from the hug as she bent to my height.

"I'm really sorry, Adi. I'm really very sorry for hurting you. I didn't mean the single word I told you. Forget that I ever said something like that," My mother whispered as her eyes turned moist.

"It's okay, Mom. That's fine.", I told her to stop this matter. I know she said that in anger, but I was hurt. I was already hurt, needed her comfort when she lashed out at me. Can I forget the pain I had to endure when I assumed My Mom regretted giving birth to me? Can I forget the double pain I had to suffer because of the words that come out in a fit of anger? Can I? Maybe, just maybe if I hadn't endured the pain with the whatever that happened to me, maybe I'd be accepting the hug, the comfort, the warmth. But, is that the case? No. I needed someone to listen to me, my pain, my sufferings. When I went to the best person in my life to share that pain, she doubled my pain unknowingly, impulsively. Can I share that pain ever again? No! Can I accept the comfort again? Never. When I lost the courage and confidence to share my grief, Can I be normal with my mother again? I want to be normal again, but I don't know, my mind, my heart isn't letting me do that. Why? Is it only with my mother? Am I only uncomfortable with my mother? I can imagine myself hugging or playing with my brother. I closed my eyes as my mind sent a signal, I couldn't fit into the picture. A Happy Environment. Why? I couldn't find myself smiling. It's just my tears. My pain. My grief. My blood. And nothing else. Not knowing that it is the second symptom of PTSD - Ignoring/feeling no enthusiasm towards a Happy Environment. She didn't realise it yet. After all, it's just the starting.

Why? Why? Just why? Make me normal. Take away this feeling. I will die. I may die. What did I do to deserve it? What? Again and again, the same question and no answer. This is not me. I'm not Adina. I'm not. I'm becoming someone else? How could it be possible? Adina had every answer to her question. And the girl now doesn't have anything other than questions. Questions which has no answers. Questions which took her confidence away. I came out of grief ss I heard my mother.

"No, It's not okay, Adi. I didn't even check on you after screaming some none sense. I just went to my room and slept. I ignored you, dear. It's not okay. I'm so sorry, dear," I heard my mother explain herself. I can understand her, whenever she gets angry she screams with no sense and later regrets. This is how the situation is every time she gets angry. But, why did I assume that my mother hates me? Maybe at that moment, I'm too hurt to even consider someone loving me. What could I have done? I've gone to my mother to pour out my grief. And the word DIE added up to my unbearable hurt. But, I know she loves me. I'm too hurt that time, that I didn't realise what I'm thinking, too lost in my hurt, my grief and pain. All that mattered to me was that I'm in pain, everyone tried to hurt me and am a just unwanted material. What could have I done, possibly? As she took that she didn't mean it, I realised that I'm too unfortunate to get the hurt at the wrong time? Too vulnerable to think what's right and what's wrong. Am I feeling relieved as I realised this? No. Why? Not knowing that it is the early symptom of PTSD which takes time to come out.

"Mom, really, I'm fine. It's okay." I tried to comfort.

"Don't feel bad, Mom. I understand you were angry. That's fine." I hid my pain, my grief inside me, burying it in deep. I would act this way. As if everything is fine as before. Maybe, that would be better for me. Or maybe not.

"No! You were hurt. I have overlooked it. Did anyone hurt you, Adi? Huh? Forgive me for that, dear. And why were you late to come home? Did anything happen? Are you hurt?" she asked me cupping my cheeks. Yes, I'm hurt. I wanted to tell you everything. But then, I don't. I don't have that courage anymore. I can't tell you anything, Mom. What if you feel disgusted with me? I don't know anything. But, if I don't tell you, won't they hurt me, again? What will I do? I don't know. I'm afraid to tell you anything, Mom. What if you get angry? And again hurt me? What if you stop me from going out to school? I don't know anything. I want my family, my dreams and nothing more. I don't know if I have taken a right or wrong decision. I don't know if my thoughts are right or wrong. But, if this is what makes me stay with my family without any hindrance between me and my family, between me and my dreams, then this is what it is. But, what about my hurt? I'm not able to see myself smiling. Will I be the same Adina again? Or am I becoming different from Adina?

"No, Mom. I'm not hurt. I was coming home when I slipped and fell down, before that I met my friend at the spot. That's why I was late." I informed her. The information which is nothing but a pure lie. As I realised I lied to my mother, I couldn't stop myself from getting my orbs moist. No! No! Don't. Don't cry in front of Mom, Adina. Just don't. Please! Please. Please. Don't let tears betray me. I tried hard, tried very hard to not to cry. I'm not getting successful hear. I may start crying anytime. No, that shouldn't happen. That's not what supposed to happen. No, I can't! I can't cry. I consoled myself from crying when I heard my mother worrying over the matter.

"Did you get hurt anywhere, Adi? Tell me, where did you get hurt? Where it's painting,"she questioned me checking my hands. Thanks to my nightdress, some red marks on my hands are covered with the nightdress. Thankfully, I'm looking all presentable. As she tried to ask me again, I wanted to tell her. Yes, Mom! My whole body is hurting. There is not even a single part that's not hurting. Mostly, my heart is heavy. It's feeling like a hard stone thrown at my heart. As if someone is twisting the knife deep in my heart. As if someone is twisting the blade into my private part. I am hurting, very much. It's so painful. I don't even what they did to me, Mom. But, it's hurting. It's hurting like hell. Take me away from this pin, Mom. Just take me away. Please. Please. You always comfort me. It's very much hurt, Mom. I can't sleep. I can't stay awake. The same people kept appearing in front of me. Again and again. I'm not able to meet your eyes, Mom. Why? I'm not able to feel happy? Why? I'm not able to picture my future, where there is nothing but pain. Why so, Mom? Why do I feel like this? I can't open my eyes nor can I close. What's this, Mom? What's this? I'm hearing the same voices again and again. I tried to stop. I really did. But then, it's not stopping. Why is this happening? What's this called? I'm not the Adina you gave birth to. I'm turning more different. I'm not that Adina anymore. Bring me back to me, Mom. Please. You fulfil my wish, right? Take this pain away. Take this pain away and make everything as normal as before. This is not me. I don't want this for myself. I'm losing my confidence, courage. I don't know what's happening with me. Take this away. Clear my confusion. Answer my questions. I'm not able to bear this pain. I don't want to hear anything. I want me. I want Adina. I want no pain. I want....I want everything that I lost. I want everything to be good, all fine, again. Can you do that, Mom? I want to tell everything, Mom. But, I can't. I'm not able to say this. Why? Why, Mom? Neither my mind nor my heart is letting me say anything. I feel so choked up. Why is this happening to me, Mom? Everything was fine until yesterday. Why did this happen to me? What did they do to me? I don't know anything. I just don't know anything.

" It's just my ankle, Mom. Nothing else. Don't worry!" I wanted to tell everything but I couldn't. I just couldn't. I no more have that courage. Why? I don't know.

"What's the time, Mom?" I asked her as I want to know how much I slept.

" It is 9:00 PM." oh, so it's 9 in the night. I just slept for half an hour. If I'm getting those dreams in my half-an-hour sleep, what more will I get in total 6 hours sleep? Will I get sleep at all. I don't know. What will I do if the same thing happens again? I don't have any Idea.

"Come, I'll serve your dinner." Mom held my hand and grabbed me out of the room. I didn't like it. My mother holding my hand. Why? I don't know. The same scene coming in front of me. Why? I don't know. I just want to release my hand and hide behind a closed door. I am not liking this. How can I dislike something like this, my mother's touch? I don't know. I just don't know. I want to go out of the helpless state I'm in. But, I'm tied. I don't know why I'm tied. I just want to release myself from this tie, from this pain. How? God, why are you doing this to me? What should I do? Tell me, something. Anything. You help the people who are in trouble. You heal the people who are hurt, aren't you? Why don't you heal me?

I have to divert my mind.

"Mom? Where is Anand? " I asked releasing my hand from her. I have to show her that it was not intentional, me trying to flee my hand away from her. I'm not comfortable with this. And I'm hating myself for this. For the situation I'm in where I've to flee my hand away from my mother's hold. What is this helplessness? Why I'm in such a situation? God! Why are you doing this? Please. Stop. Just stop all these. I'm hating myself for this. Not knowing that she is going to hate herself more and more in the coming days.

"Oh, he went to his friend's birthday party. He told me in the morning." I heard my mother say and I nodded at her.

We reached the dining table. As I sat down in my place, My mother started serving me.

"Then what about food? Will Anand come home now?" I asked her as I lifted the morsel to eat. I'm not able to eat. I don't want to eat. As I remembered I've to open my mouth to eat the food, I remembered his touch, his lips on mine. I can't it. I felt disgusting. I just can't eat but I've to eat or else mom may think my health is not fine. With the thought, I forced myself to eat. I can't forget that. I've to go to my room. I may puke here. I have to escape. I just have to escape. I can't digest the food. I just can't. I quickly stood up and went to the washbasin to wash my hands.

I looked at my mother as she entered the kitchen. I smiled at her while she gazed at me with a smile.

"Good Night, Mom!" I wished my mother wanting to go to my room and just puke the undigested food. I can't breathe. My throat is choked up. All I can remember is the uncomfortable, forceful touches.

"What, now itself? It's your walk time, right?" as I heard my mother remember it, I badly wanted to say that No, it's not interesting anymore. It will not give me happiness anymore I don't know why I'm turning like this. But, I can't imagine my walk. Why? Why do I feel like it? I don't know. I am not Adiya anymore. I'm not the one who you brought up. I'm not the one.

"I haven't done my homework, Mom. I slept instead of doing my homework. I've to complete it now." I excused myself, as I am on the verge of crying. I can't control my emotions anymore. I have to get out of this place. I have to get in between the closed doors. But, am I ready for the nightmare, again? I'm not ready. What if it kills me? What should I do? I'm in torment. I don't know why it's happening? My heart, my head, my body aches. Very much.

I sauntered into my room quickly before I fell weak in front of my mother. As I reached my room, I quickly closed my room door not locking it, or else how will my brother come inside. I directly went to the washroom and puked. I emptied my stomach full of undigested food. I breathed, I released a sigh as I emptied my stomach. I quickly washed my mouth. As I washed my mouth and cleansed my face, I started coughing. And again, I puked. Why this? Why it's happening to me? What did I do? Isn't it enough that I have to remove my mother's touch? What more do I have to face? What more? I sobbed covering my face when I heard a sound beside me. I jerked at the sound I heard in fear. The shampoo bottle slipped from the shelf. It was just a small sound. Why did I jerk? Why was I afraid? When did I become this weak, God? Why are you punishing me? I'm hating myself more. Not knowing that there is a lot to bear, a lot to cry, a lot more reasons to hate herself more.

After cleaning myself, I went inside the room and switched off the lights. I don't like these lights. I hate these now. Why? I used to love it, right? Why this sudden change? I don't know. I just want to sleep. I just hope I don't get such a dream again, the same nightmare again. I didn't open my windows as I open it as always. Why? It didn't interest her anymore. I'm afraid of it now. I'm afraid of everything around me. Even the slightest sound is scaring me. Why? Why I'm so weak? Already my body is hurting like hell. This situation is torturing me. This helpless state is haunting me. It's traumatizing me. Why? Where did I go wrong to bear all this? I don't know. When will I come to know? Would I ever come to know? I don't know. This distress is killing me. I don't want to live like this. I really don't want this. As I slept on my bed, my back hurt. Why?

I tried to sleep in another position but the pain is still there. Why didn't I feel this pain before when I slept? Maybe, I was extremely in a hurry to go to a land where there is no hurt, I may not have felt that. As my concentration was too much on searching the land where there is no one to hurt her. Still, I lay down on my bed. I couldn't lay down for more than 5 minutes. I got up from my bed and went to the cupboard. I took two rugs and laid them on the bed. It will be soft. If I sleep on this, I may feel less pain. I was going to lay down when I heard a scream. It's my brother, and I shivered at the scream. I'm not even able to withstand a small sound and the scream? I stood up in fear as the goosebumps appeared on my skin. Why he had to scream? Couldn't he come and just talk? Why I'm getting scared? Why?

" Di, look here is the cake for you. I bought it for you," I heard my brother say as I looked at the cake in his hands. Before I could say anything, he caught my hand and made me sit on the bed. Why did he hold my game? Why? Because he is my brother. He always does. But, I'm not liking it now. I want to stay away from every touch, even if it's my little brother. Where I am? Why I am in this terrible circumstance? What's this? First my mom and now my brother. Why? Jesus, why are you being cruel with me? What did I do? What? One incident changed my feelings, everything. Will I gain me back? and when? Will it happen at all? Or am I going to live like this?

"I don't want anything, Anand. Go and sleep," I told my brother gently leaving his hold on my hand. I don't want to do this. Why I'm doing this?

"But, di! It's your favourite. That's why I brought it to you. Why are you denying?" My brother asked me, I have no answer for this. What will I tell him? The cake is my favourite. My brother gets is for me to eat. And I never deny anything my brother gives me. Why I'm doing my this? Why now? My brother will be hurt by my rejection. He is just 7-year-old. Won't he be disappointed? But, I can't eat anything now or I may puke, again. I have to hurt him. I can't hate myself more than I did, already.

" I know, Anand. But, I said I don't want this now. Take it away and sleep, go!" I ordered him and my little brother being little started protesting. I'm losing my cool now. Why? I never lost my cool? Why now?

"Di, please. I've brought it to you. Please eat, di. It's your favourite." he held my hand again and that's it, I lost my cool.

"CAN'T YOU SIMPLY UNDERSTAND I DON'T WANT IT?" I screamed at my brother while he stood up in fear. I realised what I did and tears rolled down my eyes. What did I do? He is my little brother. How can I scream at him? He brought it to me with his innocent love. What did I do? I screamed at him. Why I'm behaving this way? Why? When I thought I can't hate myself more than this, I prove myself wrong. I did wrong. I hate myself. Why do I have to scream at him? My brother has tears in his with cake in his hand.

"I'm so sorry, Nandhu. Please, forgive me. Please." I cried as I took him near to me.

"It's okay, Di!" he told me and left to his bed. I know I hurt my brother. Why I'm behaving this way? Why I lashed out at him? Why?

As my brother went to his bed I lay down on the bed and tried to sleep. I closed my eyes and the same incidents kept repeating in front of me. Why can't I get for her that? Why? God, just let me sleep, please. I didn't get any sleep as it kept flashing in front of me. I turned the other side and tried to sleep. I couldn't sleep. Why? Would I be able to sleep? And when if I did? I thought as I kept changing my positions. My body is aching with the changing sides. But, I'm not getting any sleep. What do I do? Tears rolled down my eyes with the helplessness. I couldn't sleep. I just couldn't. I kept turning my sides and after a lot of struggle, I fell asleep.

And then as I'm going into a deep sleep, I don't know how, but I felt a heavy weight on my chest. I felt as if someone is holding my hands. As if someone is holding my legs in a place. I opened my eyes as I got afraid. I rolled my eyes to see it's my bedroom. I tried to move my hands, I couldn't move them, why? I'm feeling as if someone is forcing my hands, holding them tight! I tried to move my legs but I couldn't as if someone held my legs tight. And them the image of them forcing me kept playing in front of me. Why? Why I'm seeing that? Why can't I move my body? Why can I see my brother sleeping peacefully and do nothing to call him? I called him.

"Nandhu!" why my voice is not coming out. I kept moving my lips but no sound left from my mouth. Why? What is this? Why couldn't I make any sound? Why? Just why? Tears left my eyes at the helplessness. And then I felt something, that something poking into my private part. Why I'm feeling like this? Did they come here to do that again? Why I'm not able to voice out? No one is hearing out to me. Why? Why my voice is not coming out? Why? What's this? Why my sobs are not coming out? Why? It's hurting me. I'm scared, frightened. Will any one save me this time? I kept crying that my throat dried up. Why to me?

______________________________________

How's it?

Cried?

It was one more difficult part of this story.

Share your views & this story as much as possible.

Quick question:

Are you hating Adina?

I'm asking this question because Adina is going to hate herself more for hurting others around her because of the hurt she is bearing.

What if you are in her place? Will you hate your self?

P.S.

I'm not proof-reading this story. Drafting itself is difficult for me. So, if anyone finds any mistakes, just point it out. I'll be thankful for doing that.