How do you say Hello to an Anti-social? An introvert- shy, timid, someone who prefers calm and minimally stimulating environment. Easily drained in socialization and regained energy being alone.

Someone like Leewyn Gayle Riad. An orphan. A kid without parents nor any relatives. All she've ever been with, from the moment she can remember, were nuns and lots of children like her. She was called Gayle back there, Mother Sally named her. An elder nun from Marry Blossom orphanage who was the closest person to her heart.

Nang magkaisip siya, her little brain started wondering about her life. Why are there kids like her without a mother and a father or even siblings? Why are those little children having the same age as her, felt so happy with a couple while holding their hands?

Itinuro sa kanila sa ampunan na ang tumatayong ina nila ay ang mga madreng nagaalaga sa kanila. Father Bill was the head of their family. Ang mga kapwa nilang bata na lumaki at lumalaki sa ampunan ay ang mga itinuturing nilang kapatid. She have bigger family than those kids have. She was happy too, at least most of them in the orphanage.

They play, they dance and sing. They draw each other and all the nuns are taking care of them. She too can smile holding Mother Sally's hand. There's nothing to envy those kids. But still, the little girl on her couldn't help to feel sad for no reason. The toys that used to make her feel excited to play everyday became unthrilling to her eyes. The rhymes she used to sing and dance with the other orphans suddenly became monotonous to her ears. She started needing something she can't name. It feels somewhat cold inside her little body.

She remember Mother Sally telling her they found her outside the church, where the orphanage was, when she was a baby. It was raining that time she said. Kaya siguro napakalungkot ng buhay niya. Each moment of her life was rainy days and storms inside her head.

That also put a big question on her very young mind. Did she also had parents? Did she had a family out there? No one could answer her querries.

She turned seven years old when a married couple visited the orphanage. They were looking for a child to adopt. Gayle was so excited nung pinatawag lahat ng bata to meet the pair. She really wanted to have a family just like those kids she sees going to the park with. It was her dream ever since nang nagkamuwang siya sa mundo na ang isang bata ay dapat may ama at ina na nagaaruga. A mother to take care of you. A father who plays with you. A family who will love you, who will love each other.

She did her best to impress them. She behaved well and posed good manners infront of them. It was a success. Days came and she was gone with them. She was heartbroken dahil magkakahiwalay na sila ng tumayong ina sa kaniya. She cried but Mother Sally told her not to. She told her that she'll be happier with her new parents, her new family.

They were so kind and loving that Gayle was overwhelmed. They really seems to love children even the couple haven't blessed to have their own kaya nagampon sila which she was grateful that they chose her.

It was perfect. They sent her to school. She was dressed beautifully and they gave her everything she wanted and needed. The orphan girl transformed into a princess like a fairytale dream she always wished to all the stars.

Until that night.

Twelve years old siya nun. She's already in Junior High School that time. She happily parked her bike on the garage taking the bouquet of tulips on the basket. It was her adoptive parents' anniversary so she happily steps to the porch to surprise them nang marinig niya ang mga magulang na nagtatalo. It was messed up inside. May basag na vase at nakakalat ang kung ano-anong gamit sa sahig. Umiiyak ang mommy niya sa sofa habang nagmumura naman ang dad niya pointing finger to his wife. Her mom cried river when she told him she saw her dad with someone else. They were clinging to each other.

Yes, he cheated. He denied. Her mom wanted divorce but her dad didn't let her. That was the beginning. The love they used to give her, wala na. Even their love for each other na hinahangaan niya, it faded. Yung full attention nila dati sa kaniya naglaho na din. She was barely existing. Her parents turned ice colds to each other.

Yes, they still support her studies. They always make sure she had her allowance. They eat together, all silent. Kaso yung pangarap niya, wala na. The happy family Gayle expected to have with them, lost in their repeated fights about trust.

Then they decided to sent her away. Sabi nila para matuto daw siyang mamuhay ng solo. Para masanay siyang magisa if ever she lost them. She needs to be independent they said. They seem sincere but she felt like they were slowly casting her away, forever. That they're just getting rid of her. She knew it. She heard them talking. They're tired of her. How could they even take care of her when they couldn't even mend their marriage? They were all hurting. Ang sakit lalo na with realization na hindi naman kasi siya tunay na anak kaya siguro nagsawa na agad ang mga ito sa kaniya.

She was silently hurting inside kaya hindi niya nagawang tumutol sa kagustuhan ng mga magulang. They sent her to a prestigious school as they promised na hindi pa din siya papabayaan.

But she was living empty.

Fourth year student na siya under Literature course in Milbry University. Her name's never been missed the top list ng klase. No matter how awful she felt, she couldn't add disappointments to the people that gave her a comfortable life so she's doing her best on her studies.

Hindi siya panget. She had admirers but she just found it irritating and inconvenient. Everytime she opens her locker, there were red cards na bubungad sa paningin niya from some random guys. She never knew their names dahil dinidiretso niya ang mga ito sa trash can.

She is that mean. She talks to no one. Her seat was permanent at the back near the window. She has her own world and no one dares to bother her. Everyone knew her for being absurd dahil hindi siya nakikisalamuha sa iba. Lahat sila iwas sa kaniya.

They thought she doesn't need someone. They thought she enjoys being alone. They thought she was happy that way. But they all thought wrong. She's just.. lonely.

Gayle leaned her bag beside her on a bench sa park staring at the sky and closed her eyes to feel the little peace the nature gives her. Naantala lang siya when a little girl was tripped off infront of her. Agad niya naman itong tinulungang tumayo at patakbo namang sinundo ng mommy nito ang bata na may hawak na ice cream.

Mother's love, she thought seeing how the parent was all worried for the kid. Paalis na ang mag-ina nang napansin niya ang sticky notes ng bata na kulay blue sa semento kung saan ito nadapa. She called them and returned it but the little girl gifted her the notes and left. Wala siyang nagawa kundi mapatitig na lang sa mag-ina.

She remembers the days when she was as happy as that girl holding their hands. She remembers those kids she envied for having parents she doesn't have. Her chest pains for those good memories. Napasandal na lang siya sa inuupuan.

Everytime na sumasagi yun sa isip niya, she keeps asking. Will everything ends this way? Did he breathed her life to just witness these things? Those fights and the happiness of others she still longs to have?

She keeps calling him whenever she hears their loud voices. Their angers and hatreds and pains that didn't last. She secretly struggles from the shards of their broken pieces. She keeps chanting on the ground to just swallow her and let her disappear and hear nothing from their miseries anymore. She once -always- surrender living this sicked world.

But everytime she thinks that way, Mother Sally whispers to her mind. Hold onto the almighty for he has planned better. That he has reasons for every pain. So she held on. She's barely holding on.

Malapit nang magtakip-silim nang tumingala ulit siya sa kalangitan. She pocketed her phone, earphones still inserted. Napatingin naman ulit siya sa nadampot na sticky note from the little girl. She pulled a pen from the front pocket of her bag. Hindi niya alam kung anong pumasok sa isip niya nang may isinulat sa kulay asul na papel.

There's a century tree behind the bench she's sitting that gives shade from the setting sun. She threw another read on what she wrote and decided to paste it under the seat. Then grabbed her things and had a ride on her bike going home to her dorm.

She's not expecting nor wishing someone would read that. That's the least possible place to catch someone's attention. No one would possibly find it. She just wrote something and made use of the sticky note para mabawasan man lang kahit konti ang nararamdaman niya. She doesn't need someone to read that. That piece of paper is nothing more than a piece of her frustration.

Dear No One;
Would someone even cares?

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Thank you for taking a peek. This story wasn't written with heavy kiligs and romantic scenes. So if it's not your cup of tea, it's okay not to be okay (Geu dramareul johahae? Do you like that drama?😀)

I'd still appreciate it if you give me a thumb in this part for that star.

Gamsahamnida~ ❤
Shelovesrain❤