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✧ look at me » billy ✧




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I m a g i n e : Being Billy's girlfriend and going with him to look for his sister Max, but you're the only that can calm him down when he gets angry at her for running off..

R e q u e s t e d B y : @ DolanPaulKey

[ dude, i'm sorry for the long ass delay. i really hope you can still enjoy this.. :) ]

Word Count : 1879




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"he's gonna call..whatever whore he's seeing tonight, and cancel their date."

it was you billy was supposed to be going out to see.
you were his girlfriend, yet billy's father never bothered to care.

you could hear billy's father reprimand and abuse him through the window as you crouched on the roof—waiting to be able to enter his room because billy always told you not to come in the house if his father was home.

in the entire time you had known billy, nothing ever frightened him.

"like the loving brother..that he is."

nothing ever even made him flinch.

except for his father.

"isn't that right?"

it happened every night—or every other night if he was lucky.

"isn't that right?!"
billy's father screamed into billy's face, and you could see him flinch, his eyes beginning to water out of clusters of built up emotion and frustration.

"yes. sir."
you could hear billy whisper faintly, his voice practically trembling.

he tried to hold his poise. he tried to hold his head up high in defiance of his father, but he couldn't.

so when his father left his room, he still held his cologne bottle in his hand, but smashed it in frustration against the book shelf he leaned against.

you watched as solitary tears skipped solemnly off his cheek while he pressed his palms to his eyes in pain.
your heart ached for your boyfriend as you quickly knocked on the locked window, watching as billy looked up from his hands to you.

his face quickly lit up at the sight of you, as he hurried to go unlock the window to pull you inside his room.

"oh, billy.."
you said sympathetically as you stood inside his room, watching as he paced before he stopped when you said his name.

your eyes radiated with pure affection for him, and when you saw the hurt look in his eyes, you knew he needed support.

he needed you. he needed your comfort.

"y/n.."
billy whispered as he took a step and engulfed you in a hug—burying his face in the crook of your neck—taking in your sweet smell of your signature perfume that eased his nerves.

you hugged him back tightly, stroking his neck while you felt a tear drip onto your own neck.

"shh.."
you tried to ease his nerves as you heard his breathing shutter to calm itself while he shook.

he shook from a mixture of fear of his father, and pure frustration.

"i hate him..i fucking hate him."
he mumbled shakily into your shirt as he clutched it's fabric tightly in his fists.

you stroked his back, running your fingers soothingly through his curls—knowing that when you did that, it always calmed him down.

when billy's shuttered breathing finally seemed to have calmed, he pulled away reluctantly from you, trying to compose himself.
he wiped his solitary tears from his eyes, and allowed himself to let his gaze to lock pleadingly with yours.

he let his arms retreat back to your waist, almost as if he were clutching onto you to stay.

you reached your hands to cup his cheeks, your eyes locked with his pained ones.

he still had a tear trying to escape from his eyes, and you watched as it skipped down his cheek before you stopped it—stroking his cheek with your thumb.

you placed your lips to gingerly kiss his cheek where the tear trailed before looking into billy's eyes again—your lips now moving to place a gentle and comforting kiss to his lips.

it was a sweetly calm kiss, one that was meant to say, it's me. i'm here for you. i love you.

you were the only one to ever see this vulnerable side of him.

you knew he needed you just as much as you needed him. 

and as your lips pulled away from each other's with a soft sound, you stroked his cheek reassuringly.
his eyes gave you a look of gratitude, and you smiled softly.

his eyes radiated with pure love for you—the only girl to ever have made him feel this way.

you were the only girl that ever truly loved him and everything that he was.

and you were the only girl that he ever truly loved more than himself.

"come on. i'll go with you."
you gestured your head towards his window, signaling that you would go with him to search for max.
"i have an idea of where max could be."

he sniffled once more, nodding then grabbing his leather jacket before following you out the window to go down to his camaro parked in front of their lawn by the curb.

on the car ride to the byers' house— like you suggested—, you two sat in a comfortable silence with the windows rolled down—letting the night breeze blow your hair.

billy held your hand across the arm rest as a way to stabilize himself—to keep him grounded.

his ringed fingers were laced with yours, and he would occasionally stroke the back of your hand as a way of reassuring himself that you were still there.

you would look at him, watching as his earring dangled and his jaw clenched while he drove with one hand on the wheel and the other interlaced with yours.

you could tell that he was still emotional about happened with his father, and his eyes were still pained.
you knew he was bottling up all his suppressed anger and sadness, and that was a bad habit of his that you always tried to help him deal with.

when you finally made it and parked in front of the byers' house, you and billy stopped when you watched steve emerge from the front door of the house—his hands on his hips with a barricading stance while he stared at the camaro.

you knew billy didn't like steve because of his subtle passes and flirts with you before you and billy started dating.

you saw billy as he released your hand that was laced gently with yours, and opened his car door to get out.

you watched as billy's fists clenched when he stood next to the car.

"billy.."
you called out a warning from inside the car, seeing that he was getting angrier by the minute.

billy heard you, and ducked to look inside the car through the open window.
"stay in the car, baby."
he said simply.

his eyes, however, showed just how unstable his emotions were.

you watched as he made his way over to steve, and how they spoke with spite.

you could somewhat read steve's lips say, she's not here.

but then when you looked at the house's window, you saw max's red hair peek from over the couch cushion as she watched her brother outside.

steve was lying to billy, and you knew he would get angry.
and billy saw max in the window too.

you weren't surprised when steve was suddenly shoved to the ground, but you gasped, instantly unbuckling your seatbelt before getting out of the camaro right as billy entered the byers' front door.

you trotted over to check on steve, seeing him doubled over in pain.
you offered your hand to attempt helping him up, only to be stopped by him shaking his head.

"just go help the kids.."
he groaned, and you then heard glass break inside.

you instantly ran inside to see billy in max's face, his fists clenched at his side.

you knew he would never hurt her, but you couldn't say the same about any of her friends.

he needed to get his anger—that he accumulated because of his father— out somehow, and lucas was just the nearest target.

he instantly grabbed lucas by his shirt and slammed him against a bookcase.

and before he could do anything else, you ran over.
"billy!"
you warned, your voice was muffled beneath lucas' yells and billy's empty threats.

billy couldn't hear you, so you walked up closer.
"billy, look at me."

billy heard your soft call, and he immediately stopped.
he turned around to see you standing there with disappointed eyes, and his hard eyes instantly softened at your presence.

he looked back at lucas, dropped his shirt from his hands to watch as he scrambled to his friends.

billy stood there, his own emotions taking over himself once again as he looked to the ground littered with shards of broken glass.

he was disappointed in his own self.

you looked over at the group of kids who were now backed behind steve who just came in, and you gestured for them to leave the room.
they quickly did, and you were left alone in the room with your flustered boyfriend.

you walked to meet billy, your boots crunching atop the broken glass, and reached your hands to his face.
"look at me."
you said softly, encouraging his eyes to look up to meet yours.

your touch was enough to instantly calm him—and it was only your touch that did that.

he leaned into your hand, his pained and glossy eyes looking into yours as you could sense him relax his fists to lay his hands atop yours.

"i'm sorry.."
he muttered breathily, his lips slightly quivered as his voice was wobbly.

it seemed that he was fearful.

he was scared that you would leave him—knowing just how violent his emotions could make him.
he loved you so much, it made him fearful that much more at the thought of losing you.

but you wouldn't do that. you loved him too much.

his eyes shut with what seemed to be shame, and a single tear left his eye, which you quickly wiped away.
"i'm right here.."
you whispered, stroking his cheek softly.

you leaned your forehead against billy's as he calmed himself down, his hand reaching to intertwine with yours for reassurance.

he opened his eyes to meet yours, and in an instant, he was calm again.

just by seeing your eyes.

he reached his hand that was intertwined with yours to place a ginger kiss to your palm—a sign of gratitude.

a token of his deep love and appreciation for you.

with you, he was a better person.

you helped heal his wounds, and he helped you prevent yours.

with you, he learned how to love someone so deeply—and he learned what it felt like to be loved..




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a/n : okay, that was kinda sad tho..

poor billy, he deserved more.. :'(

BUT GUYS, THIS BOOK REACHED 10k, like WHAT??

you guys are amazing.. <33

sorry about the MAJOR lack of updates on this book, but it can overwhelming sometimes to write for 11 books at a time!

but fear not, i am here & ready to publish more

xoxo, kay.

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