~Vanoss~

"Hey honey, do you know when Chloe and Max are going to get here!?" I yell over the mixer mixing the chocolate cookie dough. 

"I don't know! They said they were coming around 12:00 but it's 1:00!" His voice is muffled over the Christmas music we have playing. 

"Where the hell-?" I question but, sigh and continue with the cookies. 

~Max~

"Chloe~We have to meet the guys soon."

"I know but, why not some fun first?"

"Chloe~!"

She reached under my ugly sweater and unbuttoned my jeans. Her soft hands against my skin was all I needed to set me off. She pushed further and her fingers touched the top of my cilt. She slowly started moving her fingers, sending waves of excitement through my body. Our tongues danced and our bodies matched like puzzle pieces. 

"Chloe we're going to be late." I softly said against her lips but, honestly I wouldn't mind staying here. 

"It's okay we'll leave-"

~Delirious~

"-soon, they'll be here soon." Evan chuckled as I rubbed my hands all over his chest. 

"It's okay, they might be doing the same thing."

"Agh, Delirious~"

"Shush, it's okay." I laughed and started kissing him but, he jumped right into it and unbuttoned my shirt and my pants. 

"Holy hell Vanoss~" I mumbled onto his lips but, like his "dominant" self he still pinned me down and did what he did best; making me melt under his touch. 

After unbuttoning my pants he reached into my underwear and-

"Fuck!" I threw my head back and he moved his lips to my neck, and starting sucking; hard. I felt myself near the edge, and I knew Evan knew it too. 

"Va-"

"I know~" He said softly and I loved it. We were enjoying each other, until an unwelcoming smell came to my nose. 

"Vanoss, you smell that?" I asked and he shot his head off from my chest. 

"Shit I forgot I had-"

~Chloe~

"-cookies!" Max chuckled and she used her hands and played with my boobs. I laughed and we stayed there cuddling. It was a beautiful Christmas day. Just her and I together, surrounded by lights and happiness. I looked at all the decorations and made a huge mistake. 

"Shit! Max we're late! Wonder what Vanoss and-"

~Vanoss~

"-Delirious!" I yelled for my lover as I opened the smoking oven. I heard him sprinting from the living room. 

"What?!" He asked, panic clear through his thick voice. 

"Run down into the basement and grab the fire extinguisher!" 

"But, it's only-"

~Max~

"-smoke? Chloe how can you smoke when we're late? From having sex!"

"But, it was hot sex." She smirked and quickly put out the cigarette. 

"Go hop into the truck, I'll be there soon. I gotta grab the gays their gifts."

"But we're gays too."

"Nah, we lezbos." She used her hands to specify me. I just chuckled and started towards the truck. 

"God Chloe how'd I ever get so-"

~Delirious~

"-lucky! Jesus." I said and wrapped my arms around Vanoss.

"That was a close one. Now, where were we?"

"But Vanoss-" I was stopped by his amazing lips, and I couldn't resist. It was magical, every damn time. 

~Chloe~

"THE TIME MAX! FUCK REVERSE WE NEED MORE TIME!" I shouted, running out of the house. All I heard was Max laughing. 

"Well hurry your ass up!" 

"Fine! Text Evan we'll be there-"

~Vanoss~

"-soon! They'll be here soon Delirious! Fuck!" 

"Let me clean myself up!" Delirious chuckled and ran back into the downstairs bathroom. I laughed and ran to the kitchen to clean up the cookie mess. I grab a sponge and run to the oven but, out the little kitchen window I see the familiar rusty truck. 

"Shit! Delirious they're-" 

~Max~ 

"-here! We're finally here!" I cheer and Chloe turns into the large driveway they have. We both quickly get out and grab their gifts and the drinks we've brought. 

"Shit, here we-"

~Delirious~

"-go. You ready?" I ask Vanoss and he nods opening the door. 

Both Chloe and Max there. Max with her shirt on inside out and her bra strap showing and Chloe with her hair messed up and her belt nearly undone. 

~Chloe~

The owl had the smell of smoke on him, and his usually fancy hair was hella messed up. 

Now the raccoon had hickies all over his neck and looked like he was just finished getting a nice hand job from the owl. But who were we to blame? We were pretty much doing the same thing. 

"Well, shit." I started. 

"Merry Christmas." Max and Evan said together but, Jon and I just looked at each other. Both of us started laughing. 

"Jesus Christ, Merry Christmas!" Delirious shouted, nearly dead. 

"Ho, ho, homos. Aren't we?" I said with a smirk as we were walked into the Fong's home. 

~Narrator~

The two ships both slept with sugar plums, and hot sex dancing in their heads. As they slept, cuddling together with their other half the jingling of the sleigh bells and the laughter of the jolly man never woke them from their peaceful sleep. For, when they wake up in the morning they'll be gifts under the tree. 

"Ah, my sweet little ships." The jolly man said with an accent. He jumped up the chimney and hopped in his sleigh. 

"To all ye a goodnight! And to the naughty fockers out there! You're all wankers!" 

"That's not how it goes Saint Daithi."

"Oh well! To all ye a good night, for one and whatever the fock, let's go!" 

HAPPY HOLIDAYS FROM HOODINICLOWN! <3