The night went as quickly as it came. Once I threw Nathan's jacket around my petite body.

I kept my distance from the men that usually hung out around the old vacant stores that wasn't fat from the Grind.

My eyes shut as I drew in a deep breath. I'm seconds away from falling out from fatigue. My heels dragged against the pavement of the sidewalk. I hated living like this...scratch that, I HATE living like this.

I remember the first time my aunt Naomi sent us money for our medication...mom went behind my back and stole it for drugs...Leo was so devastated. Some days I would just want my mom to open her eyes and see that her only daughter was breaking her back trying to pay rent and manage everything on her own.

And dammit, I think I'm doing a pretty fantastic job.

A regular, stable family would look down on this, I wouldn't blame them either, from my drug addict of a mother and my absent father to my sweet brother who deserves so much better than this lifestyle. I'm always kept on my toes. I used to sacrifice my own clothes during the winter just to keep Leo warm.

If only they understood...

We didn't have anyone to lean on, at the time money was survival.

My thoughts go back to one of my most memorable days...

I remember it all. Every little detail. The clothes that I found in the trash hung loosely away from my body. At the time all I wore was a large grey, cigarette burned hoodie with old red leggings, holey socks in old slides.

I was so small that the leggings were pretty much sagging off my legs, the hoodie completely covered my arms while my slides broke here and there.

Kids at school never seemed to understand why I wore the same stuff everyday. But it was obvious to them that I was a unfortunate child. Doomed from the start, meant to die at the end.

My slides dragged against the school floors, my hair was choppy and it clung to my face, I kept my gaze low as I sauntered down the empty hallways of my elementary school. Everything was black and white to me. Since I was young I didn't really pay attention to my surroundings.

"Hey! What's in your jacket?"

My body goes rigid as a high pitched voice boomed from behind me. All of a sudden I feel myself get lifted in the air and slammed against the lockers, my backside burned as my face writhed in agony. There were three kids that stood before me, a young boy with freckles over his honey colored skin and red hair, the kid who was pinning me had black hair that was cornrowed back and he had a large scar over his emerald green eyes. A little girl stood next to the redhead, her skin pale as chalk, her eyes a murky grey color while her pitch black hair was pinned back.

I was so hungry, my stomach cramped as I open my mouth to speak.

"I don't think she has anything. She's a beggar remember?" The girl grabs the redhead by the arm as if she was trying to interject.

"She smells weird." The kid with the scar revolts, wrinkling his nose at me in disgust as his grip tightened around the collar of my hoodie.

The redhead snatches his arm away, turning to face me
"Hey, if you show us what's under your hoodie...we'll give you our lunch." He offers, pulling out a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and waving it in front me. I could feel the thick drool escaping my lips and running down the small corners of my mouth, my eyes widened at the sight of food.

But then I gulped. Showing them would mean that they would tell everyone. Once all the kids in class know the teacher will know. If the teacher knows she'll make a call home. And eventually the child protective services will separate me and Leo...and I'll be alone.

Yes, I was starving. So bad that my muscles hurt with every move I made.

"Didja see her eyes dialate at that sandwich?" The kid pinning me snarled, a small chuckle escaping his lips.

"Maybe her mommy doesn't like her, and that's why she's starving." The little girl added, forgetting about who's side she was on.

"Come on! We're giving you the perfect chance here! You've got to be hiding this cool tattoo or gross cut or something!" The redhead raved as he brought the sanchwhich close to my face.

Maybe...just one bite-no. No....

Maybe they won't tell anyone, maybe I can eat just the corners and run away...no one will no.

No. I can't eat it. I won't.

"You're going to die if you don't eat." The redhead taunted.

If they saw what was under this hoodie, they would see the slashes, the bruises, the burns and the stitches that my mother gave me.

Hey. Childhood was cruel.

"Teacher!" I screamed with whatever strength I had remaining my my lungs, the boy pinning me brings out some sort of blade from the pocket of his pants which shut me up immediately.

I squeezed my eyes shut as warm tears begun to flow down my cheeks.

The scar faced kid leans in close to me and whispered, "This is a blade that's used for tattoos...if you scream again I will make sure you'll wear sleeves for the rest of your life."

"Leave her alone Kinnian, let her rot like the garbage she is." The redhead fumed, completely disappointed in my refusal. The boy whom I assumed was Kinnian lets go of me and lets me fall flat on my face onto the cold floor.

Moments later, the kids were gone.

As a kid I knew what starvation was like...how afraid I would get whenever I see my ribs protruding from my chest.

How I had to make early sacrifices.

This wasn't even one of my worst memories.