I eventually got in bed and spent a long-time watching videos on the internet. My hair was pretty short compared to how long it had been for most of my life, and it air-dried by the time I checked the clock again. It was definitely approaching bedtime.

"Zeke?" It felt appropriate to whisper. I closed my eyes, knowing, trusting that when I opened them, he would be there.

"I'm here." Sure enough, he was standing beside my bed, looming.

I scooted over. "Come sit."

He hesitated, but then sat down. He was still in the turtleneck from earlier.

"I..." I pulled the blanket up around me. "I was dating this guy a year ago, and he broke up with me out of the blue." Zeke watched me intently. I felt kind of stupid.

"...And I'm not over it. That's my sob story." He frowned, and shifted around the bed. He leaned back on the headboard.

I started feeling better. This warm feeling that had kind of stuck around since earlier came back. I didn't feel as embarrassed as I was a moment ago. I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Are you doing that?" He looked serious.

"That's why you were upset earlier." He didn't ask. He didn't answer my question either.

"Answer me. Are you doing this? This- this fuzzy thing? I can't feel my emotions properly." He looked away from me.

"I'm compelling you."

"Compelling me?" I couldn't get angry.

"Nothing else I do works on you, but I can compel you." I sat up.

"What does that mean?" The warm fuzzy feeling didn't go away.

"It's an angel thing. It's not really a... a power. It's more of an aura expansion if you will." He let his head fall onto the headboard.

"You've been... sharing your aura?" I didn't know what to think about that. Lucky for me I didn't really get to feel anything.

"I usually just do it a little bit. Makes interactions with you a little easier." I frowned, but I didn't have the option to be upset. It was overwhelming, this warm thing in my chest, all around me.

"So, everything I've felt, it was a lie."

"No- not a lie." He shook his head.

"You've been manipulating me? You're manipulating me right now." He looked frantic.

"It's not manipulation-"

"Then what is it?" He stopped. The room was quiet. I looked over at my chair in corner, with the throw over it.

"I want to go to sleep."

"Gwen, I-"

"Goodnight." I rolled onto my side and pulled the comforter over me. The fuzzy feeling was dwindling away. I was so tired.

The fuzzy feeling went away entirely. I didn't hear a response, so I peeked over my shoulder. He was gone. It felt like he was gone gone. I don't know how I felt, but good riddance. I finally felt like I was making a friend other than Amanda since I started university and it was all fake.

I knew I would end up forgetting about this whole ordeal but I was so upset. I was shaking. He killed people for Christ's sake! Yeah, he was angel, but that didn't make him less of a threat? He led me on. I felt like a stupid little girl trying to put my life on pause, to live in this fantasy world. Who am I kidding, my life has been on pause since David left. I barely see my parents anymore; I never call them. I'm just an average student, barely passing- barely living.

I got into chemistry in high school and I ended up studying here at the university, several hours south of where I was living with my parents. I did get a scholarship in first year, I had decent grades, but now I'm nothing special. I'm not smart among actually smart people, and I'm a 'liberal nerd' around everyone else.

My friends from high school were all far away. I did keep in touch with a few, but it was impossible to visit. I would sometimes hang out with Amanda's group of friends, as she grew up like an hour away from here and a ton of her friends went to university with us. I had unintentionally become a loner by moving out here and throwing myself in studies.

For what? To get a good job and live the rest of my days in a boring, miserable haze? Angels exist! Apparently, God exists though I don't know what's up with that. Was I really going to forget all of this and go back to not believing in anything?

What if I refused to forget? For the first time in my life, I felt special. My life was interesting.

Not the first time. There was David.

But I had to move on. I wanted more from this life.