CYCLE SEVEN- CYCLE ELN

"What did your father do?"

Xyra shook her head.

"I want to hear you say it. What did he do?"

"He died."

"How?"

"H-He died. He just died," Xyra said, "please."

A single tear fell down her cheek and it was followed by a stinging sensation. Her hand came up to hold the side of her face, nursing the slap she had just endured. But her hand was ripped from her face. It only made her cry harder. A hand came on either side of the armchair and locked her in. A face leaned in close.

"He killed himself, Xyra. He couldn't handle you, or the strain you and your siblings put on him," he said, "he had rather take a knife to his wrists than have to live with you another sun."

Xyra tried to stop the tears. She took heavy, uneven breaths trying to calm herself down but she was choking on her sobs. Her knees came up to her chest and she cradled herself. Her ears were buzzing and all she could think about was her father and seeing his blood everywhere. Her sister screaming. Her mother wailed. It consumed her and she fell down a hole she thought she would never climb out of. Her tears fell freely as she struggled to catch her breath.

The man lowered himself, squatting in front of the chair and patting her knee, "C'mon kid. It's alright. Let it pass."

Xyra nodded and lifted up her chin, trying to get more air into her lungs. She urged herself to calm down. To use her breathing method to bring herself into a neutral state. Her mentor was no help to her, simply patting her knee through her panic. Once she had recuperated enough– which to her mentor meant she wasn't frozen in place– her training resumed.

"Do you think if you reacted like that, you would survive a serious encounter?"

"No," Xyra whispered.

"Do you think if your friends were in danger and you pulled this shit, that they would be safe?"

"No," she felt her lip tremble.

"We've been working on these episodes, Xyra, what's going on?" he shook his head and stood up, "you can be great but you need to learn to push past the emotions. Don't let anything hurt you. They are just words."

Xyra opened her eyes at the sound of coughing. She sat up and looked around, wiping the sleep from her eyes. Navi was at her desk, looking down at her maps. Xyra stayed quiet. Sitting up hadn't alerted Navi she was awake, so she laid back down and turned on her side, watching Navi at work. There was this small curl to the corner of her mouth, a slight smile at doing something she loved. Navi had once told her that she truly believed she was born just to sail and to draw maps. There was an ease with which she worked that Xyra craved. No creased brow or scowl, only an eagerness to finish her task to revel in the final product.

They had spent almost two cycles together, marking the entirety of the crew's sixth and seventh cycle on land, and she didn't remember a single fight they had. The negotiations had gone splendidly. And for two cycles, she had been free of worry. Her sister was safe. Theo was better, what Xyra had done for her had truly helped. Xyra was not lost on how insane it all must have sounded to everyone else. Besides that, Cooker was clean, for the most part. Everyone she loved was safe and accounted for and nothing but good business was on the horizon. Preparations for a new island were going great. She had even managed to become friends with the new officers. Every piece of the puzzle was neatly in place.

Even the nightmares weren't an issue. She was almost thankful for them. They brought up shit she had repressed, deep inside. Things she hadn't allowed herself to think about for so long. She had been trained to push anything negative away, that included the memories. Sometimes she talked to Navi about it, but it wasn't something that was easy to speak about with someone that didn't go through it with her. Before Navi, when she was staying with Theo and Cooker they had stayed up many nights speaking about things. It was reminiscing, but they never really talked about any of the good stuff. They had done that for too long.

"You're up," Navi said and put out her cigarette before standing up.

Xyra was pulled from her thought and she sat up, "I am."

"You've been out for quite some time," Navi said as she walked over to the window.

"How long?"

She peeled the curtains open to reveal darkness. Xyra shot out of bed.

"What the fuck?" Xyra walked over to the door and opened it to hear a tavern full of people downstairs, "how could you have let me sleep this long?"

"Because you've spent the past cycle not sleeping so that you can revise the crew rules," Navi reminded and walked over, shutting the door, "and you successfully passed your rules last night. So, now you get to rest."

"I did not do the rules alone."

"Such a good crewmate," Navi pushed Xyra back onto the bed, "giving others credit."

"You should have woken me up," Xyra laughed as she fell back, "you leave in five suns and I just wasted one whole one sleeping."

"Incorrect," Navi smiled and crawled onto the bed next to Xyra, she turned on her side and tucked an arm under her head, "I let you skip work and now you are well-rested enough to spend all night with me."

"What a smart move," Xyra also turned on her side to face Navi, "Granted, I will be tired tomorrow but I have gone many nights without sleeping and I am sure to survive."

"You don't work tomorrow. Or the sun after that. Or one after that, until I leave," Navi smiled.

"If only life works that way," Xyra chuckled and pulled her closer.

"It does. I approached Theo with a request to give you some time off and she granted it without batting an eye," Navi reach forward and brushed some of Xyra's hair out of the way. Xyra shook her head with a sigh.

"You should not have done that," Xyra shook her head

"Xy, you've worked yourself too hard. It's time for a small break," Navi insisted, "Theo and Kaia had already been speaking about it before I asked. That's why she said yes so quickly. Kaia had already agreed to take over your shifts for as long as you needed."

"All I need is five suns. Just until you are gone."

"And that's exactly what I told them," Navi shrugged, "figured you wouldn't want to be gone too long."

Xyra closed the gap between them and kissed Navi, gently. A silent thank you for always watching out for her. Xyra reached an arm over to drape it across Navi's waist as their legs tangled together.

"I cannot believe it's over," Xyra couldn't fight the yawn that left her mouth. She laughed a bit before closing her eyes, "I never thought I would get to the end of it. All of the suns started to blur together."

"And yet, you arrived at the end."

"It helped that I had someone to run me my meals and rub my neck and give me advice," Xyra said as she leaned forward to place kisses down Navi's neck, then back up it, and across her cheeks. Navi laughed and tangled a hand in Xyra's hair.

"It was for my own entertainment. You know I think it's hot when you work. The intensity...The drive, " Navi threw her head back with a fake moan, "you know what you do to me."

"I do," Xyra took advantage of Navi's exposed neck and trailed kisses down her neck and down her shoulder.

"No," Navi pushed Xyra away with a smile, "I told Aggy that we would take the girls for a few hours tonight. Cooker has something at Fingen's she wants to be there for."

"What do you suggest we do with them?" Xyra asked, putting her hand on Navi's waist.

"Thought maybe we could take them down to the square. They have a small puppet festival going on with fireworks," Navi shrugged.

"Sounds nice. I am sure they will like it."

"They've been talking about it nonstop. Cook's taken them there every night for the past three nights," Navi laughed.

"You talk to Cook right? Like about relationship and sex stuff?" Xyra asked.

"Aye."

"Is she lying to me? About her and my sister? They keep insisting nothing has happened."

"If you're being lied to, so am I," Navi laughed and cupped Xyra's cheek, "Cooker doesn't tell me anything she doesn't tell you."

"Not true."

"It is for major things."

"Well, I think we are being lied to," Xyra brought the conversation back to her intended point.

"I don't," Navi smiled with a shrug, "I think Agnes is enjoying her freedom and Cooker is afraid to impose on it and afraid she'll ruin what they have going. Classic lack of communication but in this case, they communicate a lot. And very well."

"That is odd, is it not? The way they talk about things. The way Cooker does not get cross with her," Xyra titled her head and sat up, "and she's so patient with the kids."

Navi laughed, "To be fair, Cooker doesn't get mad at most people. Just you and Theo."

"And the government. And traders. And-"

"I get it. Cooker has a lot of anger in her towards the establishment and assholes," Navi stood up and walked to her wardrobe, opening it and looking through it. Xyra stood up and followed, wrapping her arms around Navi when she got near enough, "get out of your sister's business."

"It was less my sister's business and more Cooker's," Xyra chuckled and continued placing kisses along Navi's exposed skin.

"Butt out of both," Navi turned around, "not to be greedy, but I think I deserve all the attention for the next five suns."

"I find myself agreeing with that," Xyra picked Navi up, "which means that the kids can wait. I need to make up for an entire sun of sleeping instead of giving you the affection you deserve."

Navi tried to push against Xyra but she wasn't trying very hard. Xyra escorted them back to the bed and sounds of Navi's laugh filled the room as Xyra tossed her onto the mattress.

—------

Theo wouldn't have chosen to be in that situation even if she was offered a thousand gold to do so. But, she wasn't offered a thousand gold. In fact, she was cornered and coerced into having to do the worst thing imaginable.

Babysit.

They had just sent the first voyage back out to their new island to officially begin settlement. She arrived at the docks to see Navi off with no children in hand and walked away with two. There was some mention of people being busy, someone being summoned somewhere, and an emergency at a school but Theo couldn't process any of it. All she knew was she was in charge of the lives and fate of two small children.

She couldn't think of what one did with children so she imagined she would engage them in some sort of fun activity. When asking them what they would consider fun, Maise offered up the option to go to the beach. Theo didn't think it was such a bad idea and that is how she found herself walking along the sandy path, making her way towards the beach.

Theo had let the two babble between each other for a while but the time had finally come that she was faced with conversation.

"Did you know I'm four?" Maise asked as she looked up at Theo.

"Yeah? What's that got to do with me?" Theo looked down.

"Nothing. Just saying that I'm big."

"You aren't that big. You can't keep up with me."

"Cause you're walking fast. I have small legs," Maise said as she took her sister's hand and did a little jog to catch up to Theo, "I'm four."

"I know. You said that" Theo chuckled.

"I'm four," Florence said.

"No, you're not. You're almost three," Maise corrected.

"Don't be a snitch," Theo said.

"What's a snitch?"

"A tattler."

"But she was fibbing."

"Never tell on your sister," Theo advised her.

"But mommy says we have to be honest."

"Well, you are all pirates now. Lying is okay sometimes."

"I'm a pirate?"

"Well, your mum is a pirate. Your Aunt Belle is a pirate. You are taken care of by a bunch of pirates. It kind of makes you pirate," Theo shrugged and bent down to pick Florence up because she was falling behind.

"Is Florence a pirate too?"

"Aye."

"Okay."

The only noises after that were from Florence who kept pointing out objects and colors. The peace lasted until they reached the actual beach and began searching for a nice place to sit.

"How do you grow up?" Maise asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Were you ever small? Like me?"

"Sure I was."

"How did you grow?" Maise kept falling behind and then jogging back to her side.

"I don't know," Theo shrugged, "It just happens."

"You don't remember it?"

"Not really. Do you remember when you used to be as little as Flo?"

"No."

"Exactly."

"Do you think I will be big?"

"Aye," Theo laughed, "I think you'll be pretty tall."

"Why?"

"Because your mum is tall."

"Why?"

"Don't know. She just is."

"Why?"

"We are not fucking doing this again," Theo said.

"Fuck," Florence repeated and Theo laughed.

First, she taught one to lie, and then she taught the other one to curse. Everything was going to plan, no one would ask her to watch the kids again.

"Alright," Theo put Florence down, "this is a good spot."

"Are you coming to the water with us?" Maise asked and held out her hand for Theo.

She reached down and took it, "I have to. To make sure you don't drown."

Theo also reached over and took the youngest's hand and walked them to the edge of the water. She didn't allow them to go in but they did splash around for a bit. She watched them chase the waves and then run away from them, their elated giggles filling the beach. Theo warmed up to them, she was never cold, she just didn't believe she had the ability to care for kids. She even managed to let herself get roped into a game.

After the sun had begun to get lower in the sky, and plenty of time had passed since Theo had been given charge of them, they started their trek back. Theo wished it was as simple as just walking back to town but the girls got distracted by everything. Shells, sticks, birds. Eventually, their curiosity pulled them into a run-down building. Theo had been distracted, digging through the sand for a shell that Florence had dropped, and wouldn't stop crying until Theo promised to try and find it. When she looked up, the two of them were sauntering over to the decaying facade.

"Oi!" Theo said and stood up, "get away from there!"

They both looked back at her for a moment before sprinting away and into the building. Theo was fast on her feet and bolted after them. She watched them enter and slip away from view and her heart began to race. The first time babysitting and she was going to lose Xyra's nieces. Theo yelled after them but they didn't come back out. She arrived at the opening, no door to be seen, and looked inside. They had both stopped a few feet into the building and were looking around with wide eyes.

Theo looked around too, realizing exactly what they had walked into. It wasn't a building, but a church. Destroyed on the outside but borderline pristine on the inside. The floors were clean, the single room was organized, and lining the walls weres tiles of varying blue shades. Theo stayed at the entrance, afraid to cross the threshold.

"Girls, get back here," Theo said through gritted teeth, "or I will tell your mum about this."

Florence peeked back with a giggle and then took a few more steps forward and her older sister followed. There were other people there, not many but a handful, and they all stared back at the scene.

"I thought you were supposed to be good. This isn't very good behavior," Theo tried to guilt them but it didn't work. She rolled her eyes and took a deep breath, taking one tentative step in and then another. She didn't actually think anything would happen to her, she just wasn't a fan of church. Except, something odd occurred. She felt something. Like her chest became lighter and it almost tickled. It felt like she had inhaled too much smoke and needed to get it out of her lungs but it wasn't painful.

She paused for a moment and looked around the church, maybe to see if she could spot something but it was all in her head and the feeling dissipated a moment later. Then, she heard a pained scream.

Theo lunged forward and grabbed the girls, pushing them behind her as she began to back away. In front of her, someone fell to their knees and held their hand out in Theo's direction.

"Finally," the person said with a slight sob at the end of their statement, "I'm sorry to startle you. I'm sorry. But you've come. You've finally made it. I waited for so long. So many dreams. Every night. I thought I had failed her but you came."

Theo felt the hairs on her arms raise as she watched the person in front of her, a priest of Riva's, cry as they had their hand out toward Theo. She moved backward, stepped back, and pushed the girls to also retreat as she did.

"The one with the scar. It's you. You turned away. You shut her out. She needs you," they said and Theo could see the tears trailing down their face.

She could also see everyone staring at her.

"Girls, go wait outside," Theo whispered and they both complied that time, dashing out to avoid the scary robed figure.

"Please, don't go! I have a message. I have a message for you," the priest stood from their knees and slowly walked her way, "Child. Scarred Child. Scared Child. Seek the mother of the ocean. Seek her out."

She was cemented in place as they came near her and took her hand.

"Please!" the priest pleased, "she languishes for you!"

She yanked her hand away and stumbled back. Once she crossed the entryway, she spun around and grabbed the girls' hands that were awaiting her right outside. She made off with them quickly, bending down to scoop both of them up instead to make a quick escape. The priest came out too, standing at the entrance and pleading with her to pray, to connect, to come back. Theo picked up her pace.

She had always fucking hated church. Her connection with Riva was her own the church was just the conduit that, at one point, had given her the tools to reach out. She supposed this time wasn't much different, the church was telling Theo to reach out. She was freaking out, there were tears in her eyes. She wasn't sure if it was due to the shock of what happened or the fact that Riva had been trying to get ahold of her all the while Theo had been ignoring and neglecting her.

But she had gotten a clear sign in the Grotto. A sign that she couldn't try anymore. Riva had rejected her and Theo had the rash from the jellyfish for a whole half a cycle to prove it. Or maybe it was poor timing. Maybe it was that without protection she was vulnerable and it wasn't a sign at all and yet Theo had spent half a length deteriorating one of the most important relationships she had.

Navi had told her to reach out again and she had ignored it. But not because she was angry at Riva. Her anger had long left her body, it wasn't an emotion she felt lately. She felt fear. Fear that Riva wasn't actually waiting for her and Navi had been misinterpreting. But there was no misinterpretation with that encounter.

"Teo, what's wrong?" Maise asked and Theo finally put her down once they were far enough from the building. She was surprised neither of them burst into tears at the scream, maybe they were pirates after all.

"Nothing, kid, let's get you both back home. Let's see if Morgana is free to take you."

"Mor!" Florence screamed.

"I get it, you don't like me," Theo laughed.

"I like you," Maise said and held out her hand.

"Sucks for you," Theo chuckled and took her hand, "cause I don't like you very much."

"Are you being a bully? My teacher told me about those."

Theo laughed, "I suppose I am. Sorry about that."

"That's okay. Mommy says I need to forgive people," Maise shrugged a bit.

"She's insightful."

"What's that?"

"It means she's smart."

"Oh."

"Maise, I was just joking before," Theo jostled her arm a bit, "I do like you."

"Does that mean you will come to play with me sometimes?"

"Probably not," Theo laughed.

"That's okay. Auntie Belle does a better job than you anyway."

"Ouch."

"Now, I was the bully."

"You sure were."
–

Soon after she found Morgana and commanded her to take the sun off, she handed her possession of the two children. Theo was free but it still felt like she was trapped. A foot was on her throat, threatening to crush her airways if she didn't cooperate with what needed to be done.

Theo needed to reach out to Riva. No matter how much she was scared of being rejected. No matter how much she was afraid that if she did connect, Riva would be angry. No matter how much she wanted to avoid doing so, she needed to get in the water and pray. So, she did.

Theo made the long trek back to yet another beach, one she knew would be more secluded. By then, the sun was setting and it was the perfect time for a reunion with Riva. The moon was full and bright in the sky, with not a single cloud in sight. It was like Riva sensed her intentions and opened up the sky to her. And for the first time since The Grotto, Theo fully submerged herself in the water. For the first time in half a length, she prayed. She conducted her small ritual. She allowed herself to be open to the goddess.

After it was done, Theo didn't feel the shift inside her like she had in the church. That weird feeling of momentary weightlessness never came. But when she returned to the water, to allow herself to float, she didn't feel scared. That was the only difference she could feel. That and the small hole in her, the one that was a constant presence since Riva had vanished from her life, had sealed just a bit. She allowed herself a long while to simply float, drift, and swim.

She had somewhere to be and eventually pulled herself from the water but she felt empty once she left it. Like it had been what she was missing for so long and now, she was abandoning it yet again. Theo looked up at the moon as she finished getting dressed and she let her shoulders relax and her eyes shut.

"I missed you," Theo said and a small burden felt like it had been lifted from her chest.

With a slight smile, she picked up her belongings and headed back into the city to collect Cooker and Xyra for a night of fighting.

—-

Cooker was propped up against several pillows at the foot of her bed. She took two hits from her havcera pipe before she passed it over to Agnes who was sitting up against the headboard. The pipe was taken from her hands and she took advantage of that to straighten the papers in her hands with both hands. Cooker's eyes scanned the page in front of her, rereading the essay she would distribute throughout Fingen's in a few sun's time.

It would have been easy to finish but Agnes kept bothering her, whether it was with random conversation or by nudging her side with her foot. Agnes had been relatively still for five minutes which meant her next attack was incoming. Indeed, Agnes leaned forward and snatched the papers out of Cooker's hands. She cleared her throat and began to read.

"You think it is sound logic to assume that because a woman is in power, the killing will stop and that the banning of repression will follow along with it? These policies do nothing for women unless they are already powerful and poised to take a position to strengthen Baethos. And any position of strengthening Baethos is one of force. It is a promise to use that power to repress in the name of longevity. It is a vow to put down those who are against the idea of change."

Cooker laughed and crawled over to the headboard, taking the papers back, "Stop making fun of me."

"I'm not," Agnes laughed and put her head on Cooker's shoulder, looking at the words on the paper, "I like reading what you've written."

Cooker hummed in return and continued to proof her writing. Agnes read over her shoulder the whole time. Once Cooker has flipped to the last page, she was interrupted yet again.

"How many people have you slept with since I've been here?"

"I don't know," Cooker thought about it then gestured with her hands that she was uncertain, "Three? Maybe two, the timeline is blurry. Why?"

"No reason, I just never asked. But you told me yourself, you sleep with a lot of people. So, I was wondering when you were sneaking out to go seduce people," Agnes chuckled.

Cooker put her papers away, "Seems like something you think about alot."

"It is. At first, I just assumed you didn't sleep around and your womanizer persona was all fake. Then, I figured that was illogical. So, then I just assumed you did sneak around to sleep with people. Now I know my first assumption was somewhat correct."

"Mhm" Cooker chuckled, "interesting sequence of events."

"When was the last time?"

"Why are you so obsessed with my sex life?"

"Because we are friends. And friends tell each other these things," Agnes said as she pulled away from Cooker and adjusted so they were facing each other, "when was the last time?"

"I don't know. Like, five cycles ago."

Agnes' jaw dropped, "Really?"

Cooker nodded.

"Why'd you stop?"

"I was addicted to it, I think," Cooker shrugged, which wasn't really a lie. It was true. But it was also easy to give up because she was in love, "figured I should stop it like I stopped the other stuff."

"Has it been hard?"

Cooker raised an eyebrow, "The sex stuff? Not really. Loli was harder to give up."

"Interesting."

"What about you? I won't have this interrogation be one-sided. How much sex have you had since you've been here?" Cooker wiggled her brows, "see, you have plenty of time to go sneak out and get your fix. How many people?"

Agnes just shrugged a bit, "Five. There was one that was repeated on multiple occasions."

"When was the last time?"

"Three cycles ago."

"Has it been hard to go without?" Cooker repeated Agnes' own questions.

"Extremely," the corner of Agnes' mouth turned up a bit.

They played this game quite often. A dangerous, flirtatious dance. Tiptoeing around the obvious. It had been hard because there was undeniable chemistry between them. But they didn't really talk about it. Cooker knew that they both liked each other but she could not do anything about it. It was better if they kept a distance like they had been doing. Just friends. Ones who flirt, but the flirting was harmless.

"You coming with me tonight?" Cooker scooted closer to Agnes.

"So I can watch my sister beat someone half to death? No. I firmly stand with Navi and her comments on passivism. In fact, I am going to go to Fingen's tonight to speak on my opposition to the barbarity that is occurring in this very city," Agnes protested.

"How noble. I will show up to your speech with a bloody nose to refute your points," Cooker challenged.

"Going toe to toe with me? Are you sure you'll be alright?"

"Careful. One thing I won't forget is an attack on my ability to orate and debate."

"Oh, I wasn't doubting your ability to orate."

"You are a skank," Cooker joked and it got her a punch on the arm, "ow!"

"I'm on the vanguard now. Watch out, I'm bulking up," Agnes laughed and flexed one of her arms.

"How are you related to Xyra?" Cooker stood up and shook her head with a laugh.

"I will actually be hanging out with Gianna and Iona tonight," Agnes ignored her, "so don't expect me back until late."

"Rose and Miss Yurwa are going to keep watching the kids?"

"They keep insisting," Agnes chuckled, "I swear I never see them."

"You are with them every sun," Cooker laughed and pulled on her shoes, knowing she had to leave soon, "you're the one to blame for making such cute kids. Everyone wants to spend time with them."

"Speaking of," she walked over to Cooker and leaned against the wall next to where she was getting dressed, "tomorrow I'm taking the girls out of town to the waterfalls."

"They're going to love them," Cooker smiled.

"You wanna come?" Agnes asked.

Cooker shrugged with a fake frown, "I don't know. I'm not sure they like me too much."

"Hush," Agnes laughed, "last night I was tucking them in and they asked why you weren't the one doing it."

"Of course, I would love to go."

There was a knock on the door.

"That's my cue to go participate in the awful brutal archaic fights that you are going to campaign against."

Cooker opened the door and Theo peeked in. She darted her head around and Agnes waved.

"Hello, Captain."

"Hello Aggy," Theo chuckled, "I see all your clothes are on."

"You are going to lose your bet, Captain. Your gambling days are over."

"There is a bet?" Cooker asked, "what is it? Maybe I want in."

"All of your friends have decided to degrade you and me by placing bets on when we are going to sleep together," Agnes explained.

"How do I not know about this?" Cooker asked.

"If you weren't at Fingen's all the time, you would know what goes on behind your back," Theo shrugged, "if you guys fuck this cycle, I get two hundred gold."

"Two hundred!? How big is this thing?"

"Big," Theo laughed.

"Thank you for watching my kids today. How did you enjoy it?" Agnes switched the topic.

"I didn't."

"Theo!" Cooker shouted.

"They are dreadful little creatures," Theo teased.

"I saw one of them eat another child whole one time. They are devil spawn," Agnes played along.

"On a serious note, never ask me to watch them again," Theo laughed, "I will traumatize them, it's only a matter of time. I got close this time. But I think I managed to save it."

"Excuse me? Where are you exposing my children to?"

"Alright," Cooker said and pushed Theo out of the room, "we are leaving."

—--

"Fifty gold for each winner tonight," Cooker said as she settled in next to Theo and Xyra who were leaning against the barricade protecting the crowd from the fighting ring, "nine hundred for the championship bout."

"A thousand gold for us if we each win tonight," Theo shrugged, "not bad."

"Remember our first length at sea? We barely made a thousand every five cycles," Cooker laughed.

"We will be lucky if we walk away with anything. Have you seen the competition?" Xyra asked, looking over at the other two.

"Nothing we can't handle," Theo shrugged.

"I disagree," Xyra shook her head, "maybe tonight is not the best time to do this."

"Tuni is gone. We finally have the freedom to use our fists as we please," Cooker shook her head, "I'm fighting tonight."

"As am I," Theo nodded, "plus, it's too late to withdraw our names."

Xyra sighed with a slight shrug, "Fine. We are all fighting tonight, then."

Their attention was pulled back to the fight when the crowd let out a collective groan. Theo looked over to see a bloody nose and a man stumbling back. He must have gotten hit hard.

"Oof," was all Theo could say as she watched on with a slight grimace. The fight was quickly over and the injured man was promptly knocked unconscious."

"I don't get why people don't just surrender. Call the bout. Why wait until you've lost brain matter to call the fight?" Cooker asked.

"Some people aren't cowards," Theo laughed.

"If being a coward means that I am smart enough not to let myself get knocked out and hurt even more when the fight is already over, then fine, I am a coward."

"Aye, that's what I was saying," Theo teased.

Xyra reached over and grabbed the back of Cooker's collar, dragging her away from the barricade, "Alright, you two, quit it. Cook, go warm up. Your fight is coming up soon."

Cooker pulled away from Xyra's hold on her and she stepped close to Theo, leaning over to whisper, "One sun, I'm going to challenge you to a bout and I will beat the shit out of you and you will want to quit by the time I'm done with you."

Theo laughed and Cooker joined in before getting pulled away again by Xyra. Theo shook her head and watched as Cooker finally backed away and walked off to the holding room, where other fighters were warming up.

"Stop antagonizing her," Xyra told Theo, "sometimes, it is alright to be a nice person."

Theo chuckled, "No. If I am not mean to Cooker, no one is and then her ego isn't checked."

"And who checks yours?"

"You. Cooker. Navi. Kaia. Morgana. Iona. Everyone who comes into my office to complain and tell me my job isn't being done properly," Theo replied.

"You are quite dramatic," Xyra hummed and leaned forward, her elbows on top of the barricade.

"See? You've proved my point," Theo laughed, "did you bet tonight?"

"On Cook," Xyra nodded.

Theo gasped and looked up at Xyra, "You just disparaged me and crushed my soul with two words."

"You are upset I did not bet on you?" Xyra chuckled.

"Obviously!"

"I did not want to lose my money, Theo," Xyra shrugged, "I am sorry if I am practical and understand that your bout is not the most even of matchups."

"Whatever, I'm going to go pull the bet I have on you," Theo huffed but didn't leave to go complete her threat.

"That is fine. I am not hopeful that I will win either," Xyra looked back to the ring.

Two bouts started and ended before Cooker's was announced. Once her name was called, Theo reached over to pat Xyra's arm to alert her as if she hadn't been able to hear the announcer.

Cooker walked into the ring and her opponent was her height. She looked a bit stronger than Cooker but not enough of a difference for the odds to be stacked against her. Theo cheered her on, cupping her hands over her mouth and shouting. Cooker looked over to them and nodded her head. Theo could see Skins and Morgana on the other side of the ring, also cheering her on. They wouldn't be fighting, Skins hated physical altercations and Morgana had promised Tuni not to partake. The match started and Theo was leaning against the barricade, shouting out advice for Cooker. It was no use, her voice was drowned out amongst the noise in the room but she never could stop herself from doing it.

Someone came up next to her, filling in the space that Cooker had left a while ago. He got too close, pressing up against her side with theirs.

"Watch it," Theo murmured and nudged the person aside.

"Captain Theo, must you always be so rude to me?"

Theo gripped the barricade under her and tried not to react too suddenly. Xyra was still yelling at Cooker next to her and hadn't caught onto what was happening. She turned her head slowly and confirmed her suspicions.

"Lord Ammyrett," Theo turned back to Cooker's fight, "get the fuck away from me. You know how to reach me when you are ready."

"I cannot simply say hello to you? I am enjoying the fights just like you are," he said.

"Everything alright?" Xyra looked over.

"Hello," Jona said over the crowd chanting, "I do not believe we've met. You must be Xyra."

"Is he bothering you, Theo?" Xyra asked, staring him down.

"No," Theo shook her head, "It's fine, Xy."

"I was just going to give you an update on your dear friend, Avery," Jona said, "since you were so interested in her before."

Theo glared at him and hoped Xyra couldn't hear anything. Chances were that she could.

"Get lost," Xyra said and pulled Theo behind her, puffing out her chest as she hovered over Jona.

"I was just trying to be friendly and let your captain know that Avery is due to get married next cycle," Jona said, "and I have secured an invitation. She's come to me for information on the Lady before, so, thought I would pass along the news. Maybe even offer my services again."

Theo froze, trying to process whether she heard him correctly, she popped out from behind Xyra, "She's getting married?"

"It's not public knowledge yet," Jona smirked, once again being able to get Theo to lay all her cards on the table, "if you want me to pass along another message for you, I would be more than happy to."

Theo could tell that Xyra was processing the situation, digesting the insinuations from Jona that they had worked together on something. She didn't have to look over, she could see the scowl on Xyra's face from her periphery.

"Who is it?" Theo found herself asking, knowing that the hole with Xyra had already been dug.

"Cameron Cooker."

Theo turned to the ring, Cooker's fight was ongoing and Cooker was on top of her opponent, pinning him to the ground. She had missed all of it. Theo spared a glance towards Xyra whose scowl has turned into shock and was also looking towards the ring. Theo stood next to Xyra and crossed her arms.

"Thank you for the information, Jona," Theo nodded, "as we made it clear, you aren't welcome around us. Leave and enjoy the bouts elsewhere."

Jona just laughed, more amused with the shunning than hurt, "See you soon, Captain Theo. I am going to come to visit that tavern of yours, I think it's time we had a meeting about the future."

He turned then walked away and Theo looked back up at Xyra.

"This was your personal thing that you insisted on keeping hidden?" Xyra crossed her arms, "Or is this just one of the many things you have decided to leave me out of the picture on?"

"Xyra," Theo sighed and shook her head, "it isn't actually a big deal at all. That's why I didn't say anything. I knew you would be angry."

"I thought your time of making poor decisions was over."

"You don't even know the context, Xy

'Because you did not make me privy to it before."

A few beats passed and they just stared at each other in silence.

"I won! How did it look? Badass?" Cooker smiled, appearing next to them with blood smeared across her cheek from having wiped a bloody nose. Her smile slipped, "you guys didn't watch."

"Sorry, Cook, something was happening," Theo apologized.

"Important enough to miss my fight?"

"Jona Amyrett came over to talk to Theo because they are friendly, apparently, after having worked together for several cycles," Xyra turned to Cooker, "and he came to tell us that Avery Vaith is marrying your brother, Cameron Cooker."

Cooker looked between Theo and Xyra and tilted her head, probably deciding what to react to first.

"Oh, listen," Xyra looked over at the ring, "the announcer says you are on deck, Captain, better go warm up."

Xyra turned away and back to the barricade and Theo looked at Cooker, giving her a small shrug and an apologetic frown.

Cooker looked at Xyra then turned back to Theo, "I'll talk to her. I'm sure she's just being dramatic. You know how she gets when you keep shit from us. You go focus on your fight."

"Sorry," Theo said again, "about your brother and stuff too."

"Nah," Cooker shrugged, "don't be. Don't really know the kid anymore. Has no effect on me."

Theo took a few steps back and watched as Cooker took her place next to Xyra, putting an arm around her.

—---

Theo was holding a piece of cloth to her eye, ice wrapped up inside. Apparently, the tavern they were at had upgraded to have an ice house below the ground floor. They needed one at Marian's, everything was so much better with ice. She was nursing a swollen eye and a busted lip. Nothing else really hurt because Theo was down before the fight was even started. She was distracted, her head wasn't in the game. And the person she went against was twice her size. Xyra was right not to bet on her.

For the first time in a long time, she was knocked on her ass and was out cold before she even hit the ground.

A drink was placed in her hands.

"I think they are being paid off by someone to pair you up with monsters like the person you fought," Cooker chuckled and sat on the table in front of Theo's couch.

"Why would anyone care enough to do that?" Theo asked.

"To bring the great Captain Theo down. Make you seem less powerful," she argued

"Again, who would care to do that? This is Niveal, not Corinspe," Theo muttered, "I just lost. No conspiracy behind it."

"Aw, come on," Cooker reached forward to pat Theo's shin, "don't be so down about it. We all lose sometimes. I mean, not usually and not in a room full of people but we all lose."

"Fuck off," Theo groaned and closed her eyes, trying to alleviate the pounding headache she had.

It wasn't even that she lost. It's why she lost, it's what happened before she lost. She was distracted by the news Jona gave her. Distracted by the fact that Xyra and Cooker knew that she had struck some sort of deal with Jona. And distracted by the thought of what Xyra would do when the night was over.

"Your ex is going to be in a union my brother," Cooker pondered.

"I am aware."

Theo opened her eyes to watch Cooker lost in her thoughts, most likely thinking of what essay she was going to publish criticizing the institutions of unions and that they are nothing but a political tool.

"Given your reactions about news from her before, I'm surprised you aren't booking it over to our sloop and sailing off in the cover of darkness to go rescue her,"

"I have the feeling she doesn't need rescuing," Theo said, shifting to get more comfortable on the couch.

The door to the room opened and Xyra walked in. There was blood on her undershirt that wasn't hers and she looked uninjured.

"Tonight's winnings," Xyra walked to the table Cooker was sitting on and tossed a large sack of coins onto it, "950 from the fights. And an additional 75 from my bet on Cooker and Theo's bet on me."

"You bet on me?" Cooker looked up at Xyra with a childish smile, "almost makes up for not watching my fight."

"Again, sorry Cook. We were dealing with Theo's business partner," Xyra said.

"I am not doing business with him!" Theo insisted even though she had already made that clear before, "it was a deal. A singular one. One favor for a favor in exchange."

"Sorry, my mistake. We were dealing with Theo's contract holder," Xyra reiterated and hovered over the couch with crossed arms.

"What was the deal?"

"Does it matter at this point? What's done is done." Theo shrugged, trying not to have to reveal what she did.

"It kind of matters what you did for him, aye," Cooker chimed in that time. She wasn't angry over the secret though, which made sense because Cooker had kept her share of things in the recent past.

"I haven't done it yet," Theo admitted, "he has completed his part of the deal but I have yet to do mine. He hasn't needed it yet."

"It just keeps getting worse," Xyraa shook her head, "you are going to have to kill his family, aren't you?"

Theo didn't answer, she just sat up with the ice still to her eyes and hung her head with a sigh.

"You agreed in exchange for something having to do with Red..." Xyra put the pieces together, "what was it? Information about her."

"No," Theo shook his head, "getting information to her."

"So, you've been in contact with her. Indirectly but contact nonetheless," Xyra stated.

"I have not," Theo looked up, removing the ice from her face, "I asked him to tell her that I was writing to her at a specific location. And that if she wanted to reach us and speak with us or if she needed help, she could go there to send us correspondence or review what I had sent...But she never answered."

"You've been writing to her? About what?"

"Nothing that isn't common knowledge," Theo lied a bit, there was a bit more in there. Personal tidbits about Thoe's emotions, "nothing that can compromise the crew or our mission with the island."

"And she never answered? Just picked up the letters to let the Center know just what we were up to," Xyra pressed.

"She never picked up the letters," Theo shook her head, "I told our contact to inform me if anyone had come by for them and she never did..."

"And you've known that she ignored offers to help her for how long?"

"A while," Theo said, not even remembering how long it had been since she tried to reach out.

"And yet you defended her? You allowed everyone to slowly lose hope with her instead of letting us all know what was happening with a friend of ours," Xyra said.

"I was just trying to fix my mistake."

"And created fucking ten new ones in the process," Xyra shook her head, "will we ever learn that secrets get us nowhere?!"

Xyra was frustrated. Theo couldn't pinpoint the reason, there were many. She walked away from Theo and began to pace the room, cooling off from the adrenaline still in her from the fight.

"I didn't think it was necessary to tell anyone that she wasn't answering me," Theo said but even she knew it was a weak excuse.

"You knew she refused our help. Refused to answer us. Refused to even read the words sent to her. Then, she goes around and enacts all of these laws, climbs the noble ladder, and kills people and you are mute on the issue. You continued to defend her. Continued to give us hope when you knew the context better than any of us. The Red we knew is long gone and these choices she is making are being made with the full awareness that there is a way out," Xyra recapped and she was still pacing. If it were any colder outside, her head would begin to steam with how hot it was getting.

"Kind of fucked up, T," Cooker joined in, "you weren't the only person to have a connection with her. Her friends at least deserved to know."

"I was in denial," Theo stood up and walked over to Xyra who walked away to another part of the room, "it didn't make sense because this isn't the Red we know. So I kept it to myself for a bit. Then, I realized once Kaia pointed it out that perhaps these decisions were fueled by hurt and revenge. And then I felt guilty because all of this is my fault."

Xyra shook her head and began to walk out of the room.

"Where are you going?" Cooker asked, getting up from the table and following behind her.

"Going to kill Jona," Xyra said.

Cooker sprinted past her and glued herself to the door and Theo was quick to catch up.

"Be logical, Xy," Theo tried to reason.

"I am being logical. If you have to keep your end of the deal, Jona becomes the head of his house. Worse, even if you don't keep your end of the deal, he will still find a way," Xyra said and was analyzing the barricade in front of her, "and at the rate Avery is going, she will find a way to the top too. Which means that Jona Amyrrett and Avery Vaith will most likely be sitting on the Council together at some point in time and that is not good."

"Shit," Cooker came to the same realization and began to step away from the door.

Theo dove in and blocked the door instead.

"Theo, she's right. Best to kill him now, where we can get away with it. They both know way more about underground culture than anyone else on that Council. They'll know the right rules to implement to keep the regime around. We've already seen it happen with other Councils," Cooker argued.

"And killing him in Niveal saves us problems? No. We cannot go near him right now. Not if we want our crew to get off this island safely," Theo insisted, "I was never going to make due on my end of the deal. I just hadn't figured out how to get out of it."

"We cannot have him on the Council," Xyra insisted.

"I agree," Theo nodded, "especially because he told me that him and Re- him and Avery have some sort of alliance already."

"Great time to mention more information you received from him," Xyra rolled her eyes, "also, should have kept that one to yourself because it's not convincing me to refrain from slitting his throat."

"I shouldn't have kept anything from you. When it comes to her, I have been a little clouded in my judgment. I was looking for absolution, for forgiveness, without thinking of the consequences. Not anymore. My only concern is with my crew and getting off the island safely and settling into our new one," Theo held out her hands in apology, trying to reason with Xyra to drop it.

Xyra looked at Cooker, who simply shrugged and then nodded.

Xyra crossed her arms, "Start from the beginning. And after, we will make a plan on how to move forward."

"That doesn't include throat slicing?" Theo tried to crack a joke.

"We'll see," Xyra turned on her heel and towards the couch.

She was not joking.