"Come in!" Xyra called as she gathered some papers and a journal off her desk. The door opened silently. She glanced at the entrance to find the new first mate, "You are up earlier than expected."

"I have grown used to rising around dawn. Got some breakfast, toured the ship, now I am reporting for duty," Kaia stood at the doorway, "I can come back at a different time if you'd prefer."

"No," Xyra flashed a smile but it didn't last. She was trying to be nicer to people, less standoffish but it didn't come naturally, "now is a great time to start."

Xyra gathered the rest of her belongings before walking out of the room and closing the door behind her. She guided them down the hall and towards where Xyra remembered the storage to be.

"How privy are you to what has been occurring on the ship?" Xyra asked as they walked.

"Not very. But I assure you, I am a quick study," Kaia assured although it wasn't needed. Her reputation preceded her.

"Ask me any questions that come up. I am working on some notes for you with some important crew information so you can get acquainted with those on board," Xyra said, "I will run you through my shift's routine and update you on the ship's happenings."

"How do shifts work?"

"We've got the crew back on a half sun on half off schedule. We've got a morning and night crew. I usually take the mornings and Theo takes the night shift," she explained as they arrived at the storage room, "In here you'll find Miss Yurwa, all of our supplies, and any ledgers or documents you are looking for."

Xyra opened the door for Kaia and introduced her to Miss Yurwa. After, they swung by the kitchen but Rose was not there, then they went to all areas of recreation, carpentry, and then checked in with the new boatswain, Gianna. At seeing the new ship hand, Xyra felt her heart twist. Pearl was missing and while it was good news Gianna seemed to have a handle over matters thus far, the presence of their old officer was missed. It must have rubbed off on her mood because they were almost on deck when Kaia asked.

"You alright? You've been scowling for a few minutes," Kaia asked.

Normally, Xyra would brush it off and not let anyone in on the fact she was bothered but that felt like a disservice to Pearl.

Xyra cleared her throat, "We lost our last boatswain, Pearl, in the fight. Gianna is new and seeing her face instead of Pearl's was a reminder that we have lost integral people to this crew."

Kaia nodded, a silent apology for her loss.

"Pearl was an officer. So was Oceane, who is missing," Xyra caught her up, "along with Morgana and I who are leaving, and Red who is no longer with our crew we are down to five officers spread out amongst a fleet of seven."

"Have hope. Your missing friend may come back," Kaia offered.

"Hope is hard to have when most of your life a missing pirate ends up being a dead one," Xyra deadpanned and she could feel her heart hardening at the thought of Oceane lying at the bottom of the ocean, unaccounted for in those honored for their sacrifice to Corinspe. She cleared her throat, "the amount of officers does not matter now but it will soon. So, keep an eye out for the department heads to see if any of them are suited for leadership positions."

"Understood," Kaia nodded as they emerged onto the deck.

Xyra took them across the deck and Kaia was shown the infirmary, introduced to some of the morning crew sailors, and was caught up to speed on all things first mate. She was given Xyra's usual schedule, a list of her duties, and a detailed manual for ship questions, codes, and rules that Xyra had created the moment she realized she was going to leave.

They approached the kitchen a few hours after beginning their morning and Rose was not around yet again. Instead of leaving, Xyra navigated the new kitchen and figured out a way to get one of the kettles to boil them water.

"Obviously, you do not need to worry about memorizing all of these procedures right now. I will walk you through my duties every sun until I leave."

"Not worried. As I said, I am a quick study," Kaia smiled with a tight nod, "I am a professional after all, my job has always been to come onto a crew I know nothing about and adapt."

Xyra didn't know if she was imagining things but there was some sort of tension between them. She would say it bordered on a dick measuring contest, but neither of them had one. Or Kaia was simply similar to Xyra in that her approach to business was a serious one and she didn't appreciate messing about on the job. Again, in her attempt to be a more approachable human being, she smiled.

"Right, my apologies," Xyra took the tea off the kettle and began to prepare them each a glass of tea to let steep, "I am so used to training new recruits it is hard to shake that habit when training someone arguably more qualified than everyone on this ship."

"You are underselling yourself," Kaia complimented. So maybe it wasn't a grudge against Xyra and it was just that she was serious while working, "you do quite a lot."

"I try and get as much done as I can before Theo takes over so she has more time to spend with the crew and less time buried with menial tasks," Xyra reasoned.

"I don't just mean the sun-to-sun things," Kaia said and held up the notebook full of comments that Xyra had handed her, "bit excessive don't you think?"

"If I thought it was excessive, I would not have given it to you," Xyra answered but it earned her a laugh, "I am not joking, Kaia. This job is very serious and I will be unreachable for a long while."

"The crew is in good hands," Kaia assured her, "I won't let harm come to them and I will make sure that the menial tasks are out of the way so the Captain can do what she pleases."

Xyra nodded and checked their tea. It needed a bit longer. They fell into silence and Xyra leaned against the counter with crossed arms. She was trying to keep herself from seeming overbearing but her willpower did not win over her impulse.

"I need you to keep an eye on her," Xyra said and brought up a finger to her mouth to pick at her nail, "beyond first mate duties or making sure she is doing right by the crew, I need you to make sure she is alright."

"Anything specific I should be looking for?"

"Just the usual signs that someone is off the rails. Irrational decisions, binge drinking, being too high, any signs of panic or freezing," Xyra listed then chuckled, "I would say to keep an eye out for irresponsible spending but you'd have to lock her in the brig the first time you step foot on land."

Kaia chuckled too, probably having heard the stories of Theo's lavish purchases. Xyra finished their cups of tea, preparing it with some lime, honey, and a spot of sugar. They both took hold of their cups and Kaia took a sip. She frowned a bit and went back in for another sip.

"This is exactly how I take my tea," Kaia said, "how did you know?"

"Lucky guess," Xyra smiled a bit with a shrug, "it's how your father took his, and tea recipes are often one of the things that family passes down."

"How do you know how he took his tea?"

"Your father and Uncilo spent many nights together and while you and the others were off on your own, running about the island, I was usually asked to stick around," Xyra explained, "making them tea was common."

"Ten lengths ago," Kaia pointed out, "you still remember that?"

"Once I write something down in someone's file, I rarely ever forget."

Kaia narrowed her eyes, "You had a file on him?"

"I have one on almost everyone I meet."

"What do they have in it?"

"Just observations, gossip, unless I investigate further," Xyra shrugged.

Kaia paused for a moment, sipping her tea before clearing her throat, "Can I see his?"

Xyra had expected a negative reaction. Being called a freak or getting yelled at for doing something of the sort. Xyra wished it would have been something aggressive so she could at least deny the request without seeming like a bitch.

"Kaia, I do not think that it is for the best."

"I know who he was, Xyra," Kaia said with a sad smile, "he tried to hide it from me but I knew. He thought I would think he was betraying my mother, but I never did. I knew he was happy."

"Very well," Xyra nodded, "I will give you his file."

"Can I have mine?"

"No," Xyra laughed, "any other questions?"

"I want the background for what happened with the Vaith girl," Kaia put her cup of tea down, "I feel like that is pretty important yet no one seems to be talking about it."

"Red. She was our quartermaster. She was the Vaith that was pronounced dead a bit over a length ago. She had faked it and made her way down to our ship with no clue who we were and somehow managed to charm her way to the top," Xyra tried not to look bothered but she was. She missed the girl she had once tried to turn away. They had grown close and compiled with everyone else they had lost, Xyra was starting to feel the tingling in her fingers and the ice in her veins. She clenched her fists and hid them under her crossed arms, "She hid her identity because she didn't want to be pegged as the rich noble runaway and sent back home. Hid it from us for a while. Cook and I figured it out and hid it. Theo found out when Red was exposed on the island. She got locked away and then captured during the fight. Theo and she were rescued from the lightbringer but Theo shipped her back to Elox. That is about all of it."

"Were they not romantically involved?"

"Aye. That is why I need you to keep an eye out for her. Between what happened on the lightbringer with her capture and losing someone who she cared for, I am worried."

"What exactly are you worried about?"

"I do not know, exactly," Xyra sighed a bit, "She acted a bit irrationally before the fight and I do not want that side of her to win out again...she has always had a temper but I am afraid it will emerge in the wrong moments."

"I will look out for anything of that sort," Kaia once again assured her.

"Just a general word of warning, she can get emotional. She can let her temperament get in the way of acting rationally," Xyra said, she had forgotten to write it in her notebook section about Theo.

"I know from experience," Kaia chuckled a bit.

"What does that mean?" Xyra frowned.

—---------

"You held a poisoned dagger to her throat?!" Xyra flung Theo's door open and slammed it behind her, "Do you have any idea the repercussions that could have had?!"

Theo's head shot up from where it was buried in the pillow and her eyes were having a hard time adjusting to the light. She was confused. And laying on her side. And there was a bunch of hair in her face. She turned onto her back with a grunt, leaving her arm pinned under Tuni's head.

"Have you lost all sense of decorum and diplomacy?!" Xyra continued to yell as she began to pace in front of the bed.

Her arm was unpinned as Tuni sat up with a slight frown on her face, "What's happening?"

At the sight of Tuni, Xyra stopped her screaming and her pacing.

"I am so sorry for waking you, Fortune. I did not know you would be sleeping here again."

That triggered a noise out of Tuni, a squeak like the tears were about to start flowing out. Without another word, Tuni scrambled out of bed and left the room. Theo sat up on her elbows, a dull throb on her side from having slept on it.

"She's not doing any better, is she?" Xyra looked out the door.

"No," Theo sighed a bit, "Xy, she really needed some sleep. She's been awake all night."

At the reminder why the intrusion had occurred, Xyra's face turned into a scowl once again, "Forget whatever bullshit I said at the Grotto. I am not too sure I can leave you after all."

"Oh, come on," Theo rolled her eyes and sat up in bed.

"You could have fucked up that opportunity. You are so lucky you did not," Xyra shook her head, "if you pull something like that again with anyone else, you will not be so lucky."

"I get it, Xyra," Theo brushed her off and stood up, walking past her.

"You clearly don't!" Xyra snapped.

Her arm was roughly grabbed and she was stopped mid-walk. The hand gripping her in place messed with her mind. Theo's body flashed her back to the helplessness she felt when she was shackled to the ceiling. She was frozen in place, she tried to take a breath in but it didn't work. She was stuck, she couldn't even face Xyra. Her head told her she couldn't. The person that would be waiting for her when she looked over wasn't her first mate, it would be Vaith.

"Theo," Xyra let go and took a step back, "Sorry. Sorry, T. I was just frustrated."

It shouldn't have mattered. Theo shouldn't have been so surprised. Xyra having to physically stop her for conversations wasn't anything new. Why was she so fucking scared? She was fine, they were all safe. Yet, her body wasn't getting the memo.

"Get out," Theo whispered and finally look at her.

"Theo, come on, I am really sorry," Xyra looked so worried and it made it so much worse.

Theo needed a drink but the morning was not even done.

"You can come yell at me again later," Theo motioned towards the door, "I want to be alone."

Xyra nodded and left the room. Theo walked to her drawer and grabbed a pouch from it and a candle from one of her light fixtures. The balcony would provide some much-needed air. She settled the pouch and the candle down at the table before sitting down. Her eyes couldn't help but once again drift to the empty seat next to her. Theo swallowed back some tears, the scare from earlier combined with yet another thought of what she had done to Ava made them hard to stem. She pulled some havcera out of the pouch and stuffed a pipe for herself, something to kill the pain in her side.

Puff by puff, she felt better. Eventually, she set her head down on the table and hit it against the wood a few times, "Theo, stop getting yourself in so much trouble."

She sat up and took the last puff in the pipe, "And for fuck's sake get a hold of yourself. Stop crying. Stop talking to yourself."

Theo took a moment to look out and for the first time, appreciate the view. The sun was bright, the wind was picking up and it was cold outside but there was not a cloud in the sky. She was at home amongst the waves but even with the sudden calm that washed over her, the embrace of Riva that came with being on the water was gone. Again, it was something she didn't notice until it was absent.

But she pushed anything negative thoughts out of her mind. She focused only on the fact that they had successfully launched their voyage. They had seven ships touring both costs of Efriti and they were jumping back into life as pirates. What was to come was exciting. New recruits, a new haven, new businesses, new leads. She was about to go tell Evana to add some elaborate features to her room. Why wasn't she excited? There was a hollowness inside of her that she hadn't been able to fill. The last suns at the Grotto with her friends had helped stuff it temporarily but whatever was inside the void had been flushed out.

It would get better. It was her first sun at sea, she would come to fall in love with captaining again. But a small nagging in the back of her head chimed in.

You were never in love with it in the first place. You don't know the first thing about love. Where is Ava now?

—--------

"Breathing underwater would not be as glamorous as we think," Skins passed the ravci to Theo, "I feel that the benefits would be purely work-related."

Theo took a hit and shrugged, "Like what?"

She passed the cigarette to Xyra who took a hit and let out a small cough, "Searching sunken ships for treasure."

"You get treasure and you get to swim underwater for however long you want," Tuni pointed out, taking the ravci from Xyra and inhaling only a tiny amount of smoke, "those are both more than just work benefits. That seems fun."

"Aye but then if you were the only fucker who could breathe underwater on your crew, you'd be the poor bastard that is on barnacle duty. Fuck careening, they could just call you to do all the work," Skins reasoned.

Theo laughed, "I don't see a world where breathing underwater would be anything less than the coolest fucking thing."

"I would rather be able to grow wings and fly," Tuni hummed, closing her eyes, "more things can eat you in the water. Up in the sky, not so much."

"I would speak to animals," Skins offered her opinion, "if we are choosing what ability we would want."

"Mindreading," Xyra gave her input.

Skins gasped a bit, "Oi, I'm changing mine to mindreading. But, I would be able to mindread animals too."

"What is the use of knowing what an animal is thinking if you can't talk to it?" Tuni laughed a bit, the thick ravci smoke dancing around her and entering her lungs.

Skins had a response but before she could get it out, the door opened and the party going on throughout the ship could be heard. They had all been a part of the festivities at one point or another but had retired early. Skins had woken up early to perform her duties as quartermaster and had no energy to party. Tuni had wanted to get away from the noise. And Xyra had stuck close to Theo all sun once she was allowed back around her. The apologetic behavior had not stopped. She had followed Theo up once Theo had left the voyage party early. Seeing a party going on and not having Oceane and Cooker celebrating with her felt wrong. Watching Skins take over a job that used to be Ava's felt wrong. She retreated to her room to avoid the sadness that the party had brought.

The sight of more of her crew coming into her quarters, with key people missing, hit her hard once again. Apparently, she wasn't the only one who's good vibes had gone away. At the sight of who was coming in, Tuni's laugh caught in her throat. Navi, Morgana, and Kaia entered the room, themselves all laughing about something. The initial wave of sadness Theo felt went away and she quickly got up to grab more chairs and more cigarettes. Tuni, however, had no such luck.

As Theo walked back to her chair to sit, she met Tuni's gaze. Tuni flashed a slanted smile and shook her head a bit. Theo nodded, giving Tuni the go-ahead to leave. Without trying to call attention to herself amongst the growing commotion as the groups came together, Tuni got up out of her chair and tried slipping out. Theo was passing out cigarettes when the door could be heard closing and everyone went silent.

All heads turned from the empty chair in the room to Morgana.

She clenched her jaw and scoffed, "She ended things. Get over it. Stop staring."

Theo cleared her throat with a raise of her eyebrows. If she wasn't high, she wouldn't have done it. But the nonverbal comment had been heard and everyone turned to look at Theo.

"What?" Theo asked with a nervous laugh, "Something was caught in my throat."

"She told you something different?" Morgana asked, "Cause I would love to know what she thinks happened."

"I am not getting involved, Mor," Theo shook her head.

"You got involved already," Xyra said and then covered her mouth, realizing she wasn't helping. Damn the ravci, it got both of them.

"Listen, I have no idea how things went down. All I know is that she says you told her to leave and she did," Theo held up her hands.

"How is that not her ending things?" Morgana narrowed her eyes.

"Maybe you should consider talking it over," Kaia offered, solving a problem that couldn't quite be solved that easily, "maybe having a conversation will inspire a fresh start."

"Think I haven't tried getting her to do that?" Navi rolled her eyes, mumbling under her breath.

"Fuck right out of my business, everyone," Morgana said, "I am serious."

The room went quiet for a second. Skins took the moment to light her cigarette, "Kaia, would you rather be able to mindread or talk to animals?"

—------------

The others were inside having a drug-addled conversation but Theo needed some fresh air. The room had gotten stale and it was getting too warm. Stepping out onto the balcony, she walked to the railing and leaned against it. It was windy so she took a moment to pull her hair up and then let the cold air hit her. A few minutes later, after a consistent pattern of inhaling and exhaling, she sat on one of the chairs.

After a few minutes of being alone, Kaia joined her.

"May I?" she asked, pointing to the empty seat.

"Go ahead," Theo nodded and watched her walk to her seat with a lit cigarette, "had a good first sun?"

Kaia laughed a bit, "I did. Your crew really wasted no time in making me one of them."

"It's your crew too," Theo smiled, "Xyra went easy on you with training?"

"As easy as I think Xyra can go," she nodded, "I've never worked with her before. She's pretty intense."

Theo laughed, "You've provided an accurate assessment."

"I don't say this lightly, because I am somewhat full of myself and I hate compliments, but I think I have some big shoes to fill," Kaia said, then smirked, "which is a challenge and I love a challenge."

"Well, good," Theo laughed and took the cigarette from Kaia without permission, "cause I have been described as a challenge before. By every tutor, every mentor, and every person of authority."

"You have always been a hothead," Kaia chuckled, "since you were seven and I first saw you."

"I haven't been called that since I was on Barge's crew," Theo handed the cigarette back.

"No one's ever gotten the story about what happened, how he died," Kaia said, "I want to know."

"Doesn't everyone," Theo shrugged.

"Tell me."

"You don't seem to like questions," she chuckled, "is that usually how you get your way? By demanding answers."

"I can be persistent," Kaia shrugged with a smile.

She knew someone else that could be persistent. Except, persistence came in the form of inquiries. Her mind drifted somewhat. Where was Ava? Had she made it home safely? Now that they were headed towards the mainland, maybe she could see if there was news. Maybe she would even send a letter.

A hand shaking in front of her with the last bit of the ravci brought her back to reality. She took it and finished it off.

"What happened to Barge is a secret I've sworn never to tell," Theo admitted after exhaling the last hit.

"Who'd you swear it to?"

"Can't say that either. The only thing I can say is that most of the stories get it wrong. It wasn't dysentery or an assassin for hire or any of that."

"Rumor is you killed him," Kaia prodded.

"In a way, I suppose that is true," Theo frowned then turned to look at her, she also had something she had always wanted to know, "Why aren't you at the Head of the Council? Why is it Uncilo?"

"Uncilo won the vote," Kaia reminded.

"I know that, but you were your father's nomination. You were eligible. Uncilo had always wanted the position but the way he talked about the Head vote was not like he expected it to go in his favor. I was young so I might be mistaken but-"

"During the vote, he slandered my name. He sowed seeds of doubt in every single captain there. He was relentless in his attack on my inexperience and the dangers of nepotism," Kaia said, "Because I asked him to do it. That was my favor."

"Why?"

"Uncilo had promised my father before he died that he wouldn't interfere with my nomination in that way. That if he wanted to run, he would do so in a clean way," Kaia explained but she trailed off, "I asked him to betray that promise."

"You were guaranteed a spot," Theo tilted her head, "why'd you give it up?"

"Why did you?" Kaia turned to look at her and their eyes met. She looked at peace with herself. She always did. Even with a knife to her throat. Theo wished she was like that. Coolheaded. Unaffected by negative emotions. Kaia laughed a bit, "I like to get an early start to my mornings, I am going to head to bed."

"Goodnight," Theo waved her off and for the first time that sun, she allowed herself to be at peace. If it was becuase she was numb from too much ravci, so be it.

—------

"Oi!" Navi called out, "Nightly patient check-up."

Tuni opened the door to her room and sure enough, Navi had rolled Morgana into the infirmary. She had allowed Rihed to take over Morgana's injuries until they had been back aboard. Even the night before, Morgana was tended to by Rihed before he left on Cooker's ship. This was her first night tending to Morgana since they had split ways.

"I'm going to go grab something I left in Theo's room. I'll come to pick her up once you're done," Navi said as she began to walk out. Tuni flashed her a pleading look and shook her head but Navi gave her an apologetic grimace before slipping out.

Tuni took a deep breath to prepare herself for a battle she did not want to have to face alone and walked to her cabinet to gather supplies. She laid it all out on a bed and rolled Morgana nearby. She cooperated with Tuni to make undressing and dressing her wounds easier. At the halfway mark, Morgana cleared her throat.

"We get to Nefriti in ten suns," Morgana spoke, "I'll be catching a ship straight to The Twins. A fast one. Probably going to have shitty living quarters."

A chuckle came from her and Tuni nodded in response.

"I'm not going to have anyone tending to me," Morgana smiled, "wish I had my own personal healer."

Tuni turned away and ruffled through her supplies on the bed before finding what was needed.

"Fortune," she said as Tuni was fixing the bandage over her missing fingers.

"We don't have to talk," Tuni replied, "we didn't do it any other time I did this."

"That's not fair," Morgana frowned, "I had just been tortured."

"And I am so sorry that happened to you, Morgana," Tuni stopped to look at her in the eyes.

Morgana caught her eyes and then looked away, "So, my apologies for not being the most talkative."

"We were in Corinpse for a cycle before leaving. In that time, I lost over two hundred people that were under my direct care..." Tuni found herself blinking back the tears, "did you not think I deserved at least one question asking me how I was doing? Did you not think that maybe I was also in pain and needed you?"

"I don't even know why I bothered with a conversation," she scoffed, "I can't believe you are comparing our two experiences right now, Tuni. I was beaten within an inch of my fucking life for five suns. You chose to be a healer, I didn't choose to be locked up on a lightbringer. You also chose to not stand up to Theo, which landed me there in the first place."

Tuni found tears popping into her eyes, a trained response that her body had learned in the past few suns. Any time anything remotely resembling an unbalancing of a neutral emotion was presented, it had her in sobs. The thought of holding 273 hands, and soothing them all as they passed crossed her mind. The thought of scared faces looking up at her and begging her to do something when she couldn't was all she thought about. The thought of people who didn't even have the energy or luxury to beg and scream and cry crossed her mind. The fact that Morgana was the one making her feel like she wasn't allowed to feel the same pain as her was what hurt the most.

"Mor," Tuni couldn't stop the tears. She hadn't allowed herself to cry before. Not in front of Morgana. But she couldn't stop herself. She couldn't fake being strong. The water dampened her cheeks, "Do you even hear yourself?

There was a silent pause. They both stared at each other and Tuni could see that there was still a soft side to Morgana. That is was battling the pain and hurt that settled in over her sweet demeanor. Morgana's shoulders hunch forward a bit and she deflated.

"Fortune, I wish I could take that night back. I really do," Morgana shook her head with a sigh, the previous attitude was suddenly gone, "I was really drunk. Can we have that conversation over?"

"No," Tuni said and she was surprised about it. All she had wanted was to be able to see that tender look in Morgana's eyes that she had missed. Now, she saw it but it felt wrong to ignore everything that had happened before that, "drunk or not you said everything that was on your mind. I'm not sure what this back and forth between being caring and mean is about. I know sometimes traumatized people lash out but I am not your punching bag."

"I am not being mean, Tuni. I am just not letting you act innocent in all of this," Morgana frowned again, "You are acting like a victim because I decided to hold you accountable for your role in my capture."

Tuni didn't even know why she was responding. She could have walked away or stopped answering but she couldn't just leave it alone.

"Don't make me feel crazy, you've been horrible to me," Tuni felt more tears, "I have not faulted you for blaming me, it's everything else you've done. I apologize for my actions and my role in your capture. I never wanted that to happen, Mor. I never could have imagined that this would be the consequence. It was one thing. One mistake. I turned my back on Red and I betrayed the trust of my crew by not making sure they could have a say in her jailing but I think you are blaming me for what happened on the lightbringer because you have no one to put it on. Theo herself even admitted that she would have thrown Red in prison even if I had tried to stop her."

Tuni sniffled and she began to back away. She had to go. Theo's bed was always open. She felt bad intruding but after lengths of having someone next to her, sleeping alone was awful. Before she walked out, Morgana called out for her to wait. Tuni stopped and turned around.

"Fortune," she sighed, "You are right. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm sorry... Come home with me. It's not too late. We can forget all of this..."

Tuni felt her breath catch in her throat, "I am not going home with you..."

"I thought that is what you wanted? We can take some time off. Figure out what is going on between us," Morgana said.

"Why now? One conversation and you drop your resentment? One minute and everything has changed. I went from being the sole reason you were on that lightbringer, the point of origin of the path destiny took you on but now I am suddenly right? I am in the clear? No," Tuni shook her head, "it doesn't make sense. You are jumbling my head right now and I feel insane."

"Come on, Fortune," Morgana tried to get herself closer to Tuni but it didn't work, "it's what you said. Traumatized people lash out. And then I doubled down on it instead of paying attention to the part of me that knew it was wrong..."

"The men my mother used to entertain. Her regulars," Tuni found herself shaking her head, feeling a bit queasy, "you sound just like them. You are acting just like them. That is what they would do. Belittle her and then when the damage was done they would ask for forgiveness, promise a fresh start, say they were sorry."

Morgana also began to shake her head, "Don't say that, Fortune. Those men were pigs. They were abusers. That's basically what you are calling me."

"I never called you that," Tuni felt her bottom lip tremble and she couldn't stop herself. The stone expression Morgana had been sporting lately began to grow over her softer eyes, "I'm sorry. I just said your words mimicked theirs. I've seen this before, Mor. It scares me. I don't like it."

"So, you're saying I scare you," Morgana shook her head and the person who had been around since the end of the fight came back, "I've never done a fucking thing to you, Fortune. I've never laid a finger on you and now I am being compared to the men that drove your mother to ugali and killed her."

Flashes of her mother on the floor of their den, eyes rolled back in her head and no movement in her chest entered her mind. Her breath was caught in her throat. She backed away until she was pressed against the door, "Sorry. I can't do this. I can't-"

Tuni pulled on the door handle and slipped out the entryway. Navi was lounging outside of Theo's door. As Tuni briskly walked across the deck, she called out Navi's name and alerted her that the check-up was done. She managed to keep tears in and instead of going to Theo's room and bothering her with another night of crying; she curled up in the relaxation room and tried to think of a time when her heart didn't feel broken in two.