"Are you sure you rather be here then Coney Island? We can leave now and still have time to—"

"No," I replied with a shake of my head. "I want to be here. I really needed to get out of the house. And besides this is just what the doctor ordered." 

I felt Mike's eyes on me as I indulged in scoop after scoop of my bowl of mint ice cream. When Mike called me a few hours ago to see if I was available to hang out today, I jumped on it. Everyone else I knew had something to do anyway. 

Lanie had a date with her latest beau. Harper had something with her parents that she tried and failed to get out of. Nathan had hockey practice until this afternoon. Until Mike called, my only other option was to spend the day with my parents. 

Spending the day with my parents meant more you-need-to-break-up-with-Nathan stares from my mother. I knew she liked Nathan just as much as she liked Lanie and Harper, but she was dead set on me going to USF. And I knew that she didn't believe me for a damn minute when I told her I wasn't in love with Nathan.

It was blatantly obvious to everyone. There was nothing I could about that. 

There was nothing I wanted to do about that. I loved Nathan more than anything—and I didn't care who knew it. 

"Earth to Fitz," Mike said from across the table. "You in there or am I talking to a zombie or something?" 

That made me chuckle. "Since I'm eating ice cream and not brains, I think it's safe to say I'm not a zombie." 

"So, what's wrong? Do I have to kick Nate's ass?" 

I dropped my spoon into the bowl and leaned back against the seat. "Why do you always think he's done something wrong? Lately he seems like the only person doing anything right." 

"Whoa, Fitz. I was just kidding." Mike's brows dropped into a deep V. "Seriously, what's going on with you?" 

Right on cue, my cell phone rang. I looked at the caller-id and groaned before pushing the accept button. 

"Hey, mom." 

"Karma. Where are you right now?" 

My mom's voice was cheerful and strong. Just like it always was when she was up to something. I knew what she was calling about before I even answered the phone. 

"I'm not with Nathan, mom. I'm with Mike." 

Mike cleared his throat before saying loudly so my mom can hear, "Hi, Mrs. Fitzgerald!"

"See," I said a little too curtly. "It's not Nathan." 

My mom sighed heavily through the receiver. I could picture here clearly in my mind standing in the kitchen, hand on her hip. "That's not what I'm calling about, Karma. I just wanted to know where you were so I knew when you would be home. I was going to order your favorite pizza from that place you like." 

Yeah, sure she was. "I'll be home in a few hours, mom." 

After we finally ended the call, I didn't bother looking up at Mike. I knew he was still staring at me, waiting for me to tell him what that was all about. He already knew about my USF situation. He's been pestering me for a while about what I'm going to do about it.

"I can feel you thinking over there, Mike." I got another spoonful of my ice cream ready. "Out with it." 

"Why should I bother? It's not like you're going to tell me anything." He shrugged a shoulder. "Well, anything I don't already know." 

I continued to swirl the ice cream around in my bowl for what felt like forever even though it was only a few seconds. This wasn't something I was comfortable talking about. Not to anyone. If I was going to talk to anyone about anything, Harper and Lanie were my go-to girls. I told them everything. 

But this? This was all kinds of fucked up and messy. 

Exhaling a heavy breath, I dropped my spoon again, this time making a loud clang sound as the metal hit the bowl. I brought my hands up to cover my face, scared I was about to lose it in the middle of Lloyd's and in front of Mike. 

A few seconds passed before I heard the sound of Mike sliding out of his chair to come to sit by me. Knowing my tears would betray me if I moved my hands, I kept them where they were.

"Fitz, come on. Look at me." 

I shook my head, keeping my face hidden. 

"Karma, I'm serious." His voice was soft and full of concern even though he used my first name. Mike gently reached for my hands, pulling them down. 

Then the tears fell. 

"I can't do this," I cried. "This stress is too much, Mike. What am I going to do?" 

'Karma, it's—"

My head whipped in his direction. "Don't say it's going to be okay. It's not okay. No matter what I do, someone is going to get hurt or upset. If I give everything up for the man I love, my parents will be so angry and disappointed. If I choose to go to USF, I lose the love of my life and will be heartbroken. What am I supposed to do? How do I...I mean, how can I make this decision? What do I do?" 

He nodded with a solemn expression. "You're right. I can't tell you it's going to be okay. The only thing I can tell you is what I've been telling you. You need to tell Nate what's going on." 

I started shaking my head, ready to repeat myself yet again and list off all the reasons why I couldn't tell Nathan what's was going on. But Mike didn't let me. 

"No, Fitz. I don't want to hear that crap again." He exhaled a heavy sigh. Almost like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders in that moment. "Listen to me, Karma. I love you like my own sister. You know that. But keeping this from the man you love isn't right. How would you feel if the tables were turned? What if he was keeping something like this from you?"

"I know," I said softly, fresh tears running down my face. "I would be so hurt if he hid something like this. But I just...I don't know how to tell him." 

Mike was silent for a few moments. Most likely trying to figure out a way to solve my problem for me. That was the kind of friend he was. If he could, he would step in front of a bullet for me. And I would do the same. 

Same with Lanie, Harper, and everyone I loved. 

The truth was, I didn't want to leave any of them. Even before this past summer at the beach. Before I saw Nathan completely different than before and fell in love with him. I never wanted to go to USF. My mom was the one who's been putting that in my head for years. 

When I really thought about it, there was only one possible answer. I needed to try to figure out a way to stay here and live my life with my friends, my family, and Nathan. Maybe there was a way I could look into possibly a scholarship or some financial aid for a school here in New York.

I mean, USF can't be the only school that was offering full scholarships. There had to be some way to make it so that I don't have to completely turn my world upside down just to appease my parents and get a college degree.

"So, Fitz, what's it gonna be?"

I looked over at my best friend and met his gaze. Deep down I knew he had been right all along. There was no way to completely keep this from Nathan. I had to tell him.

"I'm going to talk to him about it," I said softly. "I'm going to tell Nathan about USF and try to figure it out."

Mike couldn't have looked more surprised had I jumped on the table and started screaming on front of everyone. He had been telling me repeatedly to be honest with Nathan over the past week or two, and I have been blatantly ignoring him.

"Are you serious?" He asked with disbelief.

I nodded. "Yes. You were right. Keeping this from him was the wrong choice."

"How are you going to tell him?"

It felt like someone grabbed my heart and squeezed it. How was I going to tell him?

That was the million dollar question.

***

Good afternoon everyone. I know you guys have been very patient waiting for me to update this story. The main issue I had with updating the story has been my outline. As you know this book has three parts. When I got towards the end of the second part, my characters were going one way and my outline was going another. I had to kind of take some time and try to make sure the story is how I want it to be.

I'm glad to say I finally managed to figure out what it's supposed to happen in the upcoming chapters, and I have to say you are in for some surprises!