januarie robinson
- february 8, 2020 -

SMOOTHING DOWN THE DRESS FABRIC, my hands shook. It definitely wasn't my normal choice of attire. Not many girls could brag that they still fit in their high school homecoming dress. I guess it really did pay off when you hadn't grown since your junior year. It was this floor length, green, silk dress with a slit that started at the top of my thigh. It had a halter style top that sat completely open except for a couple of strings holding it together and stopped just below the small of my back.

            That night I chose to wear my mess of curls in a bug at the base of my neck with hairs framing my face where they were needed. It was strange to see so many people in Kensington dressed in such eloquent clothes. I didn't even know half these people owned a suit and tie.

            Grabbing tight to Cole's arm, he simply smiled at the gesture, "I'm glad you decided to come," I spoke in a whisper, "Nick said he had the seat next to mine, but it's nice to have a friendly face."

            "It's okay," his smile only grew, "Jamie doesn't really do formal things. He says it's because suits make his shoulders look weird. I just think he's afraid to run into his mother with me on his arm. I'm not exactly what she was hoping he'd bring home."

            We stepped around the corner; our laughter washed away with the rest of the noise. The Lonely-Hearts Banquet was packed every year, but it seemed to be double in size. In the back a banner hung that read 'Save the Sunshine'. There was a poster with more information, but my eyes scanned right passed it.

            "Let's get our seats," Cole motioned to the tables fitted around a large dance floor. The band played low in the background of people's voices. We found Persephone across the way, waving her hand above her head to catch our attention.

            We nodded and made our way through the dancing couples, all of them with smiles on their faces. That was the Kensington I knew. Not always polished and proper, but never without a smile or two. I looked down at my ticket and confirmed the table as well as the seat.

            Cole and I were the last two from the theatre to arrive, but I wasn't surprised considering Cole had forgotten his ticket when we first left. I looked at the seats next to mine from our distance. I was seated between Estella and Nick, but my heart dropped the moment I looked at the chair next to mine that was occupied by a man who was clearly blond and not brunet.

            "You good?" Cole asked when he noticed my speed slowing down.

            My voice came out higher than I meant it to, "Yup... Just peachy."

            Grabbing the back of my chair, I watched Cole take his seat across from me. I forced a smile and looked over at Lucas. I was barely even breathing, "Hey."

            Glancing up, his eyes widened a bit before he turned back and sat up a little in his chair. I looked down at my ticket again just to confirm the number one that was clearly printed at the bottom. Pulling out my chair, I sat quickly and placed my shaking hands in my lap.

            I squeeze my hand against my exposed knee, trying to stop it from shaking. I kept glancing between my silverware and Lucas sitting in my peripheral vision, "Is Nick not coming?"

            "Oh, no." He barely glanced my way before his eyes were off to the next thing. He checked his phone before pulling it down and turning towards me. I had to bite my cheek when his eyes dipped to my dress. I felt myself sit straight and my heart picked up speed.

            "Apparently," he drew in a sharp breath, his eyes finding mine, "he was throwing up all night and couldn't get out of bed this morning. He was supposed to be the senior representative for the company. He asked me to take his ticket and I couldn't find an excuse quick enough to get out of it."

            "Not a fan of dancing?" I asked as I steadied my breathing.

            He tried to hide a smile, "No, it's not that... I've just never been one for formal events." He turned his attention to the tables that lined the walls, "I don't really understand the baskets. It is an auction, right?"

            "Kind of," I said, finally smiling. "It's a silent auction. Women around town make baskets and whoever buys them gets the basket and a date with the woman who made it. Each of them has an activity or hobby for each pair to enjoy with one another."

            He glanced at the baskets before looking back at me and my dress, "Did you make one?"

            "Oh," my face flushed, "I did. I have since I was sixteen. It's kind of a tradition. If a Robinson goes, they make a basket."

            "Which one did you make?"

            "I can't tell you," I laughed nervously. "That kind of ruins all the fun. You're not supposed to know who made what until you buy it."

            "Since I'm here, I guess I better check them out." He nodded and left the table. My eyes followed him as he walked away. Across from me, Cole jumped from his seat and planted himself next to me. His elbows hit the table and he plopped his chin down.

            "You two seemed real chatty over here," he smiled.

            Rolling my eyes, I pushed him, "Shut up. I noticed you and Persephone talked the whole time as well."

            He laughed, "I couldn't really talk to you. Seeing as you were preoccupied with someone else."

            Cole patted my leg before returning to his seat. Now that Lucas had left the whole table erupted with noise. Everyone chatted away with one another. No more reserved conversations. The food was delivered by a handful of volunteers. Grilled chicken with a variety of vegetables, a baked potato, and a roll of bread.

            I readjusted in my seat to move closer to the table and scanned the floor for Lucas. He was stuck at the bakery booth, nodding to the women with a smile. After he finally walked away, an elderly man stepped up to speak with him.

            I looked down at my plate and smiled to myself. Most of the noise and chatter quieted as people ate. Most people, if they did speak, decided to use a softer tone. Grabbing the back of his chair, Lucas pulled it out and sat. Looking down at the food, he quietly sighed.

            He moved his chair in further, his knee bounced against my own. We both stopped what we were doing. Sharing a glance, heat rose from the bottom of my neck. His slacks were soft to the touch and I couldn't help but notice how much the feeling both calmed my nerves and excited them.

            Neither of us moved for a heartbeat of a moment. I turned to Estella listening to her speak about the new sporting event she'd been getting into recently. I nodded along with what she said, but my hand moved down to my chair in order to move it closer to the table. When I scooted in the side of my leg tapped his before settling against it.

            I listened to his fork scrap along his plate with the sudden contract. He turned away from my chair, coughing into his elbow. I could hear him apologize to Persephone. He moved around in his chair, his leg leaving mine. I didn't turn to look at him, but my brows still knotted together.

            "Sorry, could you explain that again?" I asked Estella, trying to make my sudden change understandable. She started going into even more detail of the rules and regulations for Badminton. I nodded along and tried to seem interested, but my breath caught in my throat when Lucas' entire leg came flush with mine.

            Once Estella had exhausted every attempt to get the table fascinated with Badminton, she grabbed her date's hand and pulled him to the dance floor. The rest of the table proceeded to follow their lead. Cole gave me a single glance before turning to Persephone and hauled her off to dance.

            Lucas and I sat for an entire song without speaking a single word to each other, but our legs firmly pressed together under the tablecloth. When the next song started, I turned to face him, a smile playing on my features, "Would you like to dance?"

            His eyes widened and his brows shot up, "I don't know if that's the wisest decision on my part."

            "Oh," my smile fell, "surely one dance wouldn't hurt anyone. It's kind of strange for us to be the only two sitting down, don't you think?"

            I watched his eyes dart from the people dancing to my hands laying on the table, but still, he didn't say a word or go to move an inch. I laid a hand on his arm and smiled, "Just one dance?"

            Slowly a smile worked its way to his lips, "Okay, just one."

            "Awesome," I laughed and grabbed his forearm, pulling him behind me on the dance floor. For a moment he stood in front of me and just stared at me, my dress hugging the different spots of my form. His hands fidgeted by his side. Smiling, I shook my head. The song was slow, there wasn't much you had to do in ways of dancing.

            Reaching out, I grabbed his hand and placed it on my exposed back. A poor decision in the fact that we both stiffened instantly with the touch. I forced myself to keep breathing and I took his other hand in mine.

            The only other person I'd danced with this close was my dad before he died. It was hard to get used to. When he didn't move, I rubbed his shoulder slowly with my thumb trying to ease the stress as my mother used to. It backfired though as I felt his shoulder tense, "Lucas, you're supposed to lead."

            "I'm sorry," he shook his head, "I'm having a hard time focusing."

            I couldn't contain my laughter, "First of all, you've got to relax. We're dancing, I'm not taking you to meet your parents. Haven't you ever danced before."

            "Not even in high school," he admitted. "You? I'm sure you went to all the dances."

            My breath caught in my throat, "I've danced, yes. But, as for school dances, no."

            "You never went to your high school dances?"

            "I've gone. That's why I have this dress, but I never danced at them."

            "Why didn't you dance?"

            I laughed, "I guess it's kind of like Captain America said, I'm was just waiting for the right partner."

            His brows knitted together as he thought, "If you never danced in school, where did you learn to dance?"

            I smiled then, "My dad. He danced with all of us before he passed. It was hard because once he danced with one daughter, they all wanted one. Him and my mom used to dance all the time. He usually interrupted her while she was cooking or doing the dishes. It was mostly in the kitchen. She had this small radio that sat on the window seat overlooking the backyard. It was all very cinematic. But she knew if the volume went up that meant she was about to be swept away from what she was doing."

            "After he passed, she would complain about what a distraction it had been. But I saw her face when my brothers picked up the habit. She couldn't stop smiling when they danced with her."

            "Again, I'm so sorry."

            My thumb rubbed against his shoulder once more, but this time he didn't bristle under my touch, "You can't keep apologizing for something that wasn't your fault." I paused and looked around at everyone else, "Also, we can't just keep standing here."

            He pulled me in, "Can't we though?"

            My head feel back as I laughed, "No. Soon it will start to get suspicious. As if I dragged you out here just to get my hands on you."

            Dimples appeared in his cheeks, "Didn't you though?"

            "Absolutely not." I could feel his hand twitch on my back, "Now move those feet of yours, Mister." I laughed when he didn't attempt to move. I pulled him with me and moved us around the floor. It was clumsy and I was leading most of it, but about halfway through I think he caught the basics and took over.

            Once the song was over neither of us stopped moving. We danced through the next two songs that the band chose. I smiled, looking down at Lucas' feet that kept in time with a song that no longer played, "I think you've really got the hang of it now. Told you there was nothing to it."

            I was about to teach her something more complicated when a hand tapped him on the shoulder and we both froze. I'd completely forgotten we were at an event with others. Cole peaked around Lucas with a smile that took up his entire face, "May I cut in?"

            "Yes," Lucas answered quickly. He dropped the hand he was holding, but kept the other secure on my back, "Of course, Cole."

            Grabbing my hand, Cole pulled me further onto the floor. He twirled me and brought me in close. I couldn't help but laugh. He was such a show off at times. As we moved, my eyes wandered back to our table for only a moment, while we simply swayed together.

            "Januarie?" Cole spoke below the music just for the two of us to hear. Resting my head on his shoulder, I hummed as a response.

            "Do you like him? Do you love him? I don't get it." My head shot up and Cole took that as an opportunity to twirl me once more. We got into an easy rhythm of step, step twirl. It took everything within me to not just stare at him. I was taken back to a year ago when Victoria asked me a similar question.

            "I won't tell anyone if that's what you're worried about," he winced. "Okay, I'll tell Jamie, but besides him... No one else will know. Your secret's safe with me."

            I glanced over at Lucas sitting, his arm draped over the back of his chair, casually talking to someone who'd come up to speak to him and I smiled.

            "Yes."

            Cole's brows pulled together, "Which one are you answering yes to?"

            I laid my head back on his shoulder, my arms wrapping around his neck as I sighed and mumbled, "I think both of them."