Crave You~ Flight Facilities ft. Giselle

(Saturday, 6.45pm~ outside Max's house)

"I can't believe they were gonna just throw all of this out." Fudou remarked, holding a stack of containers full of food from work. "I mean I can believe it." he continued "We always end up cooking too much by the end of the day and it all goes to waste." He shook his head. If there was one thing Fudou hated, it was people wasting food...
"Well, I guess that's dinner sorted." Handa replied with a light laugh.
"Fuck yeah."

They pulled into the driveway. Fudou stretched a little "Man, I can't wait for my day off, I could really do with some vitamin D you know?"
Handa chuckled "Haha vitamin D."
Fudou just stared at him as the other brunette parked the car, clearly embarrassed "Sorry. That was awkward of me..."
Fudou rolled his eyes, but sent the other a smile "Just leave the dick jokes to me okay?"
"Right."
The two got out of the car, Fudou suddenly tapped the other on the shoulder. "Uh, Handa?"
The brunette turned around, face instantly falling.

"Hey." Fubuki's soft voice spoke, walking over to the two with a cake tin tucked under his arm. Handa sighed and shut the car door "Hey Fubuki."
The silver haired male smiled lightly at the two "I came by this morning but you were already gone."
Handa took the tin as Fubuki explained that it was a blackberry and yogurt cake. He stared at it for a moment before looking up and meeting the other's eyes, he sighed. "Would you...like to come in?" He asked. He figured it was about time he formally apologised to the other, hopefully that would make their interactions less awkward.
"Only if I'm not intruding." Fubuki replied politely, Handa just shook his head, unlocking the front door.

Fubuki was glad to see that it no longer smelt so strongly of alcohol, although there was the faint smell of smoke. He turned to Fudou.
Fudou, anticipating what the other was about to ask, took Fubuki aside whilst the other brunette disappeared into the kitchen.
"Me and Kidou are...kinda on a break. We just need a little space from each other so I'm staying with Handa for a bit."
"Oh, I see."
He gripped the other's arm a bit tighter "But...you don't need to tell anyone else that okay? I don't need people sticking their noses into my buisness. It'll just-" he kissed his teeth and rubbed the back of his neck "-It'll just cause problems and I can't be bothered with that shit..."
He didn't care about the break up part, but if Fubuki mentioned to his husband that he was staying with Handa, Gouenji would inevitably tell Kidou, and that was a whole mess he was trying to avoid. He'd told Kidou he was going to stay with Celine and Éva for the time being.

Fubuki nodded slowly "I understand. My lips are sealed." Fudou let go of his arm, the other had the kind of face like he was a trustworthy guy. Handa came back, carrying a plate with slices of the cake Fubuki had made on it. "We can go in the living room." He suggested and Fubuki smiled at him before Fudou spoke up. "Do you mind if I take a smoke break? I'll just be outside." He said, feeling as though he should leave the other two alone. He shouldn't really get involved.
"Uh, okay sure." Handa replied, kind of wishing the other would stay.

"Did you do this?" Fubuki asked, walking over to an easel that sat in the corner of the room, breaking the ice between the two.
"Oh, yeah...it's just like a hobby.." the brunette replied, watching how the other studied the painting carefully.
"It's a fringed iris." Handa explained. Fubuki nodded "Ah yes, they're endemic here aren't they? Afuro's taught me lots about flowers."
The brunette picked up a stack of photographs at the side of the easels, photographs of various plants and flowers. "Afuro said I could use these as references since he had no need for them." He explained, putting the photographs back.

"It's really good!" Fubuki praised, Handa gave him an awkward smile-it was still very amateurish in his mind. "It's...relaxing for me I guess? Max and I, we used to go to this amateur art class every month. He was pretty good at life drawing and stuff..." he trailed off, not feeling in the mood to talk about his boyfriend. Fubuki just nodded in understanding. "Do you have any others?" He asked after a momentary silence, Handa tensed up "No...just this..." Handa has thrown out the other paintings- they reminded him too much of Max.

"Look Fubuki, I just wanted to apologise for what I said, you know, a while ago..." he sighed, moving to sit on the sofa- neither of them had touched the cake yet. "I shouldn't have said it, I know you were just trying to help but...I just didn't want-" he stopped. 'Don't try and make excuses, you should be apologising'
His shoulders fell as he looked down at the cake, unable to meet the other's eyes. "And you've been so nice to me, I mean you've basically acted like nothing happened. You even bring me cake all the time. You're really good at baking by the way, like you should start a business with it."
"Thank you, you know Afuro said the same thing actually." Fubuki mused, taking a seat next to the other. Handa tried to look at him, worried if he didn't his apology was come off as insincere. He still couldn't meet the other's eyes though.

He bit his lip, this apology wasn't going as smooth as he had hoped, Fubuki just sat there patiently listening before reaching over and taking a slice of cake for himself and eating it. Handa let out a breath "Basically, I'm just trying to say I'm sorry. I know I really hurt you, even if you keep pretending like nothing's up between us. You were trying to reach out and I pushed you away and said the worst thing I could possibly say about you." He couldn't bring himself to utter the words he'd said that morning. His voice began to shake. "I was just so....lost and I felt so alone and then- then you showed up and I don't know I just got so angry because I just wanted to be left alone to try and process everything and I know that's not an excuse for how I treated you and what I said and I know I don't really deserve your forgiveness but I just wanted to at least say I'm s-sorry for it and that I felt so shit about it all this time and everytime you'd come with your cakes I just wanted to apologise but I just couldn't and I couldn't help but think that everyone hated me because of it and I'm not saying that to make you feel bad like that was-that was my fault but it just made me feel even worse about it all and it made me hate you more- I mean not h-hate you like I know it wasn't your fault because it was my-all my fault and-"
"Handa." The other commanded softly.

He placed a hand on the brunette's shoulder "Handa, look at me." He directed, a calming lilt in his voice. The other did just that, finding Fubuki's eyes awash with sincerity. "It's okay." He reassured but Handa shook his head "No it's not."
Fubuki put out his hand, stopping the other "Please, let me speak, okay?" He stated, voice taking on a tone that sounded much like Gouenji. Calm yet powerful. The other fell silent.
"I said some things I shouldn't have as well and I'm sorry for that. But that's all in the past now, and there's no point dwelling on it and making us feel worse about something that happened in the heat of the moment. I've forgiven your words, and I hope you'll forgive mine too."
Handa nodded quickly, not able to speak.

Fubuki glanced at the cake before focusing back on the brunette, his eyes full of understanding, his voice quiet. "I understand what it's like to feel like this. To lose someone you care about, to lose all hope and feel like nothing will ever get better, you just want to shut yourself away and deal with it by yourself because it feels easier that way, and I understand how easy it is to lash out at people when you're feeling like that.

I get it Handa, I really do. I went through...many moments of feeling like that, through childhood, through adulthood, even now. But I had good friends around me, to help me through those difficult times. Gouenji, Someoka, they were my rocks.

Friends, really good friends are important to have Handa. I'm sorry if I was being overbearing, and I'm sorry that it came across to you like I was only reaching out now; I just wanted you to know that even though I haven't exactly interacted with you or Max much you could still talk to me. Because I'm one of the few who understands. I know we're told that as guys we're not supposed to talk about our feelings, but that's such a bunch of BS. It's important to talk and get support when you need it, so if you ever want to talk or just vent, don't hesitate to reach out to me okay?"

He stood up, hand still resting on the other's shoulder. He looked out towards the patio doors where Fudou was standing smoking, he looked back at Handa "And I'm not going to sit here and tell you it's all going to be okay, because I don't believe that anymore, but I will say that it can get better, someday. And everyday that your here, every day that you struggle but ultimately get through, just shows how strong you are. And that's something to celebrate." He pulled his hand away, taking another slice of cake for the road. "I should leave you two in peace, I've got some errands to run; but please don't forget what I've said, it's important. I'm here for you Handa, if and when you need me."

The silver-haired male walked along, just admiring the city landscape in the early evening. He was so glad he'd been able to finally smooth things over with Handa, he hated when things were left unsaid, it was just too painful. He didn't actually have errands, but he'd felt it was the right time to leave, let the brunette decompress a bit.
He walked past a large office building, the lights still on 'I bet those people will be working late' he thought, about to walk idly past when something caught his eye.

Someoka.
The man was walking into the brightly lit reception area, hands in the the pockets of his smart grey suit. He pulled a lanyard over his head and placed it inside his jacket pocket whilst having a short conversation with the person at reception. They laughed and waved at the man as he left. Fubuki just stood there staring.

Someoka stopped when he saw the other. Fubuki gave him a soft smile and jogged over to him "Hey! What a coincidence! Did you just finish at work?" He asked brightly, Someoka just stared at him. Shirou waved a hand in his face and laughed softly "You okay?"
The taller man quickly snapped out of his trance "Yeah, sorry I just...didn't expect to see you." He cleared his throat before speaking again "What are you doing out?"
The shorter male stuffed his hands into his pockets "Oh, I was just visiting Handa." He explained.
"Handa." Someoka replied slowly. He hadn't seen the brunette since-

Fubuki pokes his cheek "We said we'd meet up and never did!" He exclaimed, remembering back to that night at the bar "And you didn't answer any of my calls or texts Ryuugo!" He pouted.
"Sorry, I've been real busy."
The shorter male nudged him and smiled "I can see that, look at you hot shot!" He pointed at the other's suit "You look amazing, I wish I could pull off a suit like that. And sunnies too." He pulled a pair of sunglasses out of the other's breast-pocket and tried them on, posing "How do I look?"
Someoka shook his head, full of embarrassment over the compliment "You look silly, who wears sunglasses during the evening?"

Fubuki looked up at him, his big eyes obscured somewhat behind the tinted lenses. He laughed  "I suppose you're right." He placed the sunglasses back in the pocket before holding onto the other's arm, beaming at him "Hey, we should go out for some food or something, right now. There's no time like the present!"

Someoka was getting a little flustered, he looked away from the other "Where's Gouenji?" He deflected and felt the other let go of his arm.
"Oh, he's at the amusement park with Sacha." Fubuki replied simply. The other gave him a confused look "Sacha?" Then he realised "Oh right, Sacha...I keep forgetting he has a kid."
Fubuki giggled softly "Yeah."
Someoka tilted his head to one side "Why aren't you with them?" Fubuki sighed "Weekend tickets are so expensive, so I suggested they go without me. Besides..." he looked out across the road, sincerity in his voice "I think it'll be good for them to spend some time together, just them. Bond a bit..."

"So, I've got the evening all to myself." He placed a hand on the other's shoulder "Wanna keep me company?"
Those words, they sent Someoka's head in a spin.
"Unless you're too busy..." he felt the other's hand slip off his shoulder. He turned to the other quickly "Yeah I'd like that." He breathed.

"Great, let's go then!"

Why can't you want me like the other boys do?
They stare at me while I stare at you
Why can't I keep you safe as my own?
One moment I have you, the next you are gone
Rehearsed steps on an empty stage
That boy's got my heart in a silver cage
Why can't you want me like the other boys do?
They stare at me while I...crave you

(7pm~ Wibbly Wobbly Burger Bar)

"Can I get a Catalan burger and chips and, oh a side of loaded nachos. What about you Someoka?"
The other scanned the menu, he wasn't too hungry. "Uh I'll just have the falafel and spinach burger."

Someoka watched him scarf down the food once it arrived.
"I don't usually get to do this." Fubuki explained, half-eaten burger in his hand. Someoka watched as the juice oozed out of it, dripping down Fubuki's forearm.
"Gouenji's very big on healthy eating, especially with Sacha around- but I just had such a craving for junk food."

He handed the bowl of fries to the other "Eat." He said simply but Someoka declined. "I'm good."
Fubuki shrugged his shoulders "How's your veggie burger?" He asked, scooping up some sour cream and avocado on a nacho and popping it into his mouth.
"Good." He replied, taking a bite in an effort to not seem like he was just watching the other eat. "Would you like to try it Shirou?" He asked, already knowing the answer.

"Only if you're okay with that?" He replied softly, his friend nodded. Someoka fed the other the burger, watching as Fubuki pushed his hair back out of the way, opening his mouth wide. Someoka didn't even give it a second thought, neither did Fubuki, this was just how they'd always acted. He took a bite, chewing it with a pleased look on his face "It is good!"

"You wanna play some pool after this?" Fubuki asked once he'd finished his food.
Someoka leaned back in his chair and scoffed "You can still move after all of that?"
"Of course!"

"Must be weird having a kid around." Someoka said, lining up a shot, he missed and kissed his teeth. Fubuki smirked at him.
"Not really, Sacha fits right in, and he's so well behaved. Shuuya...struggled a bit at first, but he's getting better, and that's all that counts." He reminisced. Someoka leaned against the pool table, not having much interest in the game.

"Did you ever think about having kids or something?" Someoka muttered, almost as if he didn't really care for an answer.
"I mean, we never really talked about it. When he came back to Japan I was just so happy to see him again and-" he stopped, taking a moment to compose himself before continuing "-When I found out he had a kid, of course I was shocked, and kind of worried, but I knew we could make it work." He answered truthfully.
"That's unsurprising, you've always been great around kids, you're a natural-born parent." The other replied, his thoughts turning to a strange dream he'd had recently- Fubuki sitting on his bed, combing a little girl's hair and singing a sweet lullaby...

He turned his attention back to the game. Fubuki was winning- that was to be expected, he'd always been great at pool, only Fudou had ever beaten him- and Someoka was pretty sure the man had cheated. He watched as Fubuki lined up a tricky shot, body bent over the pool table. Someoka looked away, feeling his body heat up. He unbuttoned his collar, trying to cool off a little.
"Remember, loser buys drinks." Fubuki said and Someoka looked back at him, drawn in by his voice. The other winked at him before landing the perfect shot.
"Why don't we just end this now, you're clearly gonna win." He breathed, trying his best not to show how flustered he was.

Fubuki straightened up and let out a chuckle "Come on Ryuugo, don't give up, it's still all to play for!" He cheered, a grin on his face.
Someoka shook his head, placing the pool cue on the table "Nah, I know when to quit." He handed the other his credit card "Go buy the drinks. Don't go crazy though, I'm driving."

"What is this?"
Shirou arrived at the table with a tall ice cold beer for himself but none for his friend. "You're driving, so I got you a chocolate milkshake." Fubuki smiled, handing the tall glass to the other who just looked at it, unimpressed.
"You 100% got this for yourself Shirou."
"No, I got it for you!" Fubuki smirked and Someoka rolled his eyes. Chocolate milkshake with extra whipped cream, chocolate sprinkles and a strawberry? That was Fubuki all over.
"Kanpai." The other beamed, raising his glass. His friend begrudgingly followed, the glasses clinking together rhythmically.

"-I just recently got promoted actually." Someoka recounted, sharp black eyes focused on the other's slightly glassy teal-grey ones. "Wow, you never told me." Shirou mumbled happily, a little subdued from the drink, his cheeks rosy. Fubuki couldn't handle his drink well.
"Sorry, I forgot."
It was always different with Fubuki. Sometimes he was extremely giddy, or he'd get very sad and complain loudly about things, other times he'd get very clingy and flirty. Someoka had only experienced the last Fubuki a couple of times, but they had definitely been experiences for him.

"Uh yeah. It was for the Milan group, but I turned it down."
Fubuki put his arms on the table, leaning forward and resting his chin in his hands "Milan...that's so far away." He breathed out, staring up at the other, Someoka looked away. "Yeah well, that's why I turned it down. A couple months away from you guys was enough for me."
"I missed you. We all did." Fubuki muttered, keeping the eye contact up. He let out a sad laugh "For a moment I thought you were going to do a runner like Gouenji did. I thought you weren't coming back."
Someoka looked back at him, feeling guilty. He'd meant to call, meant to speak to him. But every time he tried fear held him back, he couldn't bear it. It was just easier for him to try and ignore those feelings. "Shirou-"

Fubuki clasped his hands together, a smile now on his face "But you got promoted, that deserves a celebration!" He beamed, but Someoka still could not shake the guilt. "Yeah well, it's not that big a deal. My boss says I've improved a lot since I started, so that's why he gave it to me regardless."
He thought back to his old journalist gig. The company he worked for previously was not the most reputable around. And there was that whole mess with that Maria woman, and with the article he wrote about...
He was glad to be rid of them.

"So...how have things been with you? On the relationships front?" Fubuki suddenly asked, swirling the last dregs of beer round in his glass, seemingly mesmerised by it.
"I'm too busy for a relationship right now." The other answered. That was a lie. He wasn't too busy, in fact ever since his promotion he'd had more time to himself than ever, he desperately craved a relationship. But the person- well people he desired he knew he couldn't have.
He went a little quiet and Fubuki frowned. "What's wrong?"
Someoka shook his head "Nothing. Just a bit tired." He pushed the half-finished glass across the table to the other "Here, you can have the rest. I'm full." He muttered, knowing how much of a sweet tooth Fubuki had. He accepted the drink, and Someoka couldn't stop looking at him as he drank it, his lips pressed tightly around the straw.
He excused himself to bathroom.

He splashed some water in his face, trying to calm down. He didn't think it was going to be this difficult, he thought he'd be able to keep his cool but he was sorely mistaken. All he could think about was Fubuki, Fubuki, Fubuki.
He remembered how things were before Gouenji came back; he'd tried to get Fubuki to notice him but the other just wasn't in the right place mentally. Someoka knew it'd be wrong to ask him out when he was like that - Fubuki had gotten worse as time went on whilst Gouenji was away...

Someoka was busy making Handa some lunch since he knew the other had not eaten breakfast that morning. Fubuki had called. The conversation was pleasant at first, although Someoka could tell his friend wasn't feeling good. Then it started.
"Gouenji messaged me today, after months of radio silence. All he said was I've made a mistake." His voice went quieter "Maybe that means he's coming back...I asked him what happened but he said not to worry about it?"
Someoka sighed "Shirou..." he didn't want to get the other's hopes up, but he didn't want to shoot him down either. More importantly he didn't want to argue with him again.

Fubuki's voice was sharp on the other end "I know what you're going to say Ryuugo. But I have to hope at least?" Someoka shook his head, he was getting nowhere with him. "I can come visit you this weekend if you want?"
Handa looked up.
"No, that's okay, you don't have to do that." Fubuki had said, the two said their goodbyes. "You really like him don't you?" Handa asked quietly, Someoka shook his head, going back to cooking "He's only ever seen me as a friend, he's fully in love with Gouenji. That's not gonna change."

A few weeks later he found himself sitting up in bed, Handa tracing small circles on the his bare chest, the brunette looked up at him "You still thinking about it?" He whispered, Someoka sighed deeply, running a hand down his face. Handa had been living with him for a while now, and yet he couldn't stop thinking about his confession to Fubuki.

"I just, can't believe he wants to wait for Shuuya, the guy's married after all. He's just gonna get hurt!" He muttered angrily. The words kept playing in his head "I'm sorry Ryuugo, you're a great guy, and one of my best friends, but I love Shuuya, I can't just give up on him."
"But didn't he already reject you? That night when..." the brunette remarked.
"I never... I never actually told him explicitly that I loved him, I wanted him to hear that. That night...we were both drunk and we just shouted a whole bunch, it wasn't a proper confession, I wanted to do it right you know?" Handa turned onto his back, staring up at the ceiling, Someoka continued.

"I'd hoped that maybe he'd changed his mind about it all, finally seen some sense. "
He frowned "I guess I never really stood a chance, compared to Shuuya I'm just not good enough." He turned and crawled over so he was straddling the brunette, looking down at him. "But that doesn't matter anymore, I've just got to forget about him, besides I have you now." They kissed.

Someoka gripped the sink. "What am I doing?" He asked his reflection sadly.
'You're never going to be over Fubuki, you can't stop thinking about him. But it's too late, you missed your chance buddy.'
'You promised yourself you'd give up on him, he was never going to be yours then and he'll never be yours now.'
He couldn't stop thinking about that perfect silver-haired man, and the perfect life he'd imagined for the two of them, he'd been with him at his most vulnerable, when they were kids, and again during adulthood.

All the reminiscing only plunged him further into his own personal hell of regret and mistakes. 'And what about Handa?'
'You went too far and now you've ruined it with him too. And you still say you love him? You can't even get your story straight, you're just lying to yourself.'
'He was just a replacement, a rebound, that you made the mistake of falling in love with.' Someoka's mind drifted back to that night he called Handa up, the night everything changed, the one he always tried to forget, and the events that had led up to it...

He'd been with Fubuki, keeping him company. They'd both had too much to drink. Fubuki was on his couch, head on Someoka's shoulder, loudly cursing out Gouenji for leaving him. Apparently, Gouenji had gotten married and kept it a secret from him- Shirou was heartbroken. He looked up at Someoka, tears staining his cheeks "I thought I meant something to him!" He wailed, clutching onto the other for comfort "I told him I'd do long distance but he s-said no, he said it was better this way and I finally accepted that b-but-" he let out another pained cry "-not only was he dating again but he got fucking married! Married! And he kept that from me! And to think all this time I've been waiting- waiting for him to c-come back."
His breath hitches in his throat as he buried his head into Someoka's side, feeling those strong arms wrap protectively around him.

Someoka's heart ached. How he desperately wished he could tell the other just how much he meant to him. He hated seeing his snow angel so broken like this. "That idiot." he muttered, holding Fubuki tightly as he wept. His mind became fuzzy, Fubuki smelt so nice, he breathed in the scent of his hair and all he wanted to do was grab his face and plant sloppy kisses all over it. He was reaching breaking point, Fubuki just smelt so good and his body fit so perfectly in his arms, and then Fubuki pulled away and got up.

He clutched his head in pain, sniffing. "I've drunk too much, I need'ta go home." He mumbled, completely exhausted.
Someoka grabbed his hand "Shirou..." he stood up, looming over the other slightly "It's late, stay here tonight, okay?" But the shorter male just shook his head, wiping away the tears on his face "No, I'm gonna-" he let out a shaky breath before grabbing his phone out of his pocket, texting someone "-I'm gonna go home and then I'm gonna take the Shinkansen to Hokkaido first thing in the morning, a-and I'll be home before the evening. Or better yet I'll just fly and be home in under two hours." He let out another shaky breath, sending the text to Afuro and fumbling his phone back into his pocket.

Someoka's face fell. "Fubuki... you shouldn't go now, not when you're like this. I was serious when I said you should come and stay with me." He grabbed the other's hands "You can stay here with me for as long as you want, I won't even charge you rent unlike Afuro does!" Fubuki shook his head, pulling his hands away "No. I'm leaving. Staying here is just reminding me of him! I knew it was a mistake to come to Tokyo, I never should've listened to you." He cried, going over to the cupboard and pulling out his coat and scarf.

The other raced up behind him, shutting the cupboard door. "No, you have to stay, please stay here with me Shirou." He pleaded but Fubuki would not listen. He watched as his crush shrugged on his coat, wrapping the scarf around his snow-white skin. "Shirou..." he tried again, Fubuki looked up at the tone of voice, Someoka looked so pitiful.

He walked over slowly, feeling guilty but knowing in his heart he could not stay any longer, it would just cause him more pain. "Ryuugo..." he whispered, standing in front of the other before hugging him closely to himself.
"I don't want you to go." He heard the other mumble into his hair, he looked up, meeting Someoka's dark eyes that were so full of pain.
"Shirou." He repeated again, reaching down to caress the face of the man he loved so much. He couldn't wait any longer, he closed his eyes, leaning down to kiss the beautiful man below him. Fubuki pushed him away before their lips could touch.

"What are you doing?" He choked out, Someoka let out a long sigh "I can't hide it anymore Shirou, I want you."
"Well I don't want you." He replied in disbelief, taking a step back from the other man. Someoka sighed again, stepping forward, so tired of pretending. "Come on Fubuki, you need me."
"No, what I need is a supportive friend right now, not this." Fubuki stated, shaking his head furiously and keeping the other at arms length.

"I'm waiting for Shuuya." He whispered before turning on his heel and heading for the front door. Someoka grabbed his arm again, pulling him back. "Would you just forget about him already! Gouenji is not coming back, why can't you see that Shirou?! He's married! It's clear that he's moved on from you." Fubuki got out of the man's grip, tears beginning to prick in his eyes once again "I-I won't believe it, he just has to..."
Someoka shook his head in disbelief "I've been there for you Shirou, through all of this, through all the shit you went through as a kid- I was there! And I've waited, god I've waited for you to see me, I've waited years and years Shirou. It's my turn now, and you won't even give me a chance?"
Fubuki pushed him back "Shuuya was there for me too! He's been there for me just as much as you have! And lets not forget that when we first met you were nothing but horrible to me!" He yelled in anguish.
Someoka balled his hands into fists, getting frustrated now. "I'm sorry okay! How many times are you gonna make me apologise for that?!"
Fubuki ignored him, grabbing his boots and sitting on the floor to lace them up.

"I get it."
Fubuki stopped. Someoka came up behind him, he turned around, he could see how upset the other was.
"I get why you like him, why you've always liked him." Someoka began, shoving his hands into his trouser pockets "I mean, look at me- I'm no match for someone like him. He's so cool, and handsome, everyone always said you two were perfect for each other, you both look great. Obviously you couldn't downgrade to someone like me, I get that."
There was a pause before Fubuki slowly rose to his feet. "Do you really think I'm that shallow? You think I'm rejecting you because Gouenji and I would...look better together? You think I only care about looks?"
He got up in Someoka's face, his voice stern.
"I'm rejecting you because I don't love you."

Fubuki left and Someoka carried on drinking into the night. He just lost it. That was his chance to confess to Fubuki and it had gone so badly, and he was probably never going to give him another chance and he was going to go to Hokkaido and never forgive him and-
He tried to call Fubuki but the man would not answer. He called Handa- he wasn't really sure why. He couldn't remember what he said, it was just nonsense. It was all a blur, he was pretty sure he'd called the brunette Shirou a number of times, holding onto him tightly and wailing about how it wasn't fair whilst Handa tried to calm him down.
"Someoka, it's okay, um why don't we get you into bed?" Handa had reasoned, trying to drag the drunk man upstairs.
"Bed? I don't need to fuckin' sleep!" He pushed the other away, almost falling down the stairs.

Handa somehow managed to get him upstairs, and into the bedroom, Someoka flopped onto the bed with such force that it made the floorboards creak. He planted his face into the covers, mumbling Fubuki's name. Handa wasn't sure what to do, should he make the other try to be sick? He was clearly very drunk.

"You think I'm a great guy don't you?" Someoka said loudly, suddenly behind the brunette. "Y-yeah." Handa replied, a little startled. Someoka placed both hands on the shorter male's shoulders for stability. "You care about me right Handa? You love me don't you? I know you do you had that stupid little crush on me in Junior High didn'you? Every-everyone said you did I knew it I knew you liked me but fuckin' Shirou doesn't fuckin'- but you love me don't you Handa?" He slurred, squeezing the brunette's shoulders tightly until the other cried out in pain. "You wanna be with me right? You'll stay right?" He pleaded as Handa winced "I-You're not thinking properly!" He said desperately, but the other only held on tighter.

Someoka shook his head, remembering the terrible thing that happened after that moment.
Fubuki never brought up the confessions - or the things he'd said and done, he acted like it never happened, and Someoka was glad about that.
And even if he was just a rebound, even if he was just using him as a replacement, Someoka did love Handa. His heart was conflicted between the two, of which he knew he could have neither.

He left the bathroom and noticed that Fubuki was gone, he soon spotted him outside on the phone.
"That was Shuuya." He said as Someoka approached him "Apparently Sacha went on one too many rides and threw up, they're on their way back."
"Oh right. So I guess you'll be going then?" Someoka asked, Fubuki put his phone away and grinned up at him "Well, they're still a while away, I've got time. You fancy another match?"
Someoka smiled "Fine, you're on."

((Oof a very long chapter but one that I wanted to get out before the holidays. I'm going to be updating very slowly because of uni and things, but I hope everyone has a fun holiday period.
Don't forget to vote and comment!
-see ya! ))