(Monday, 3.45 pm)
My fingers gripped the cold surface, slipping a little as I stumbled somewhat out of my unconscious state.
"Han?"
I groaned, not wanting him to see me like this.
"Wha-what happened?" He asked and I was faintly aware of his presence in front of me, slowly I got to my feet, swaying a little bit catching myself on the counter.

I was pretty hungover; splitting headache but no nausea at least. I remember waking up this morning, but I must've gone back to sleep in the same place. It's all so fuzzy. I didn't get drunk last night. I don't drink to get drunk, I drink to pass out.

He took another step towards me, his face a mixed-bag of emotions.
"My-there was only a couple of students in my revision class today, so I cancelled the lesson. I've been trying to get a hold of you all day, I was worried you know." He said like nothing was out of the ordinary here. I nodded slightly, dragging my feet as I attempted to move past him, but he stopped me. I felt his fingers curl around my arm, locking me in place. "Please, what happened? Have you been here all day? Your door wasn't even locked-"
"So that's how you got in, I was wondering." He squeezed my arm, admittedly it hurt a little, but I didn't say anything "Can you please take this seriously? I want to help you." My eyes veered towards his; he looked kind of angry, but there was sympathy behind them too.

He released his grip on me and I sighed. "I was just trying to-I just wanted to t-to forget-" I stopped, feeling a lump form in my throat 'fuck, I'm gonna start crying again' I tried to take a deep breath to calm myself down but it didn't work, it only made things worse "-I w-wanted to forget about e-ev-everything...Just p-pass out til the pain was ovv-ver-" I bit my lip, unable to get through my sentence.

Kazemaru patted me on the back a little, saying that it was good I told him the truth and such but I could see how disappointed he was in me. That disappointment grew when he forced me out from the kitchen and into my semi-destroyed living room. "What the, oh Handa..." 'Oh Handa, oh you poor thing...' He probably didn't mean to sound so patronising, but it pissed me off nevertheless "Sorry if the way I deal with things upsets you Ichirouta." Yes I was angry, but he was the only one I had right now, I needed him on my side.

He sat us both down, placing his hand on my head "Han, I know you're hurting but, it's not like, he's gone-"
"Please can we not talk about this right now..." I mumbled and he nodded respectfully, stroking my hair softly. He did that for a few minutes while I just sat there, enjoying the feeling. It was kind of weird, but it was just what I needed.

"Anyway, you could go and see him. I could take you-if you wanted." He said, blatantly ignoring my last comment, bringing his fingers through my hair once again. But I didn't really care, not with how calm he was making me feel.
"Good." He whispered before getting up and facing me.

(Nagumo)
"I love you so much. You, Anaise, and the little Bean that's going to be joining our family soon." I whispered, stroking away a stray hair from my husband's face.

"I love you too Haruya, and I love you for doing this. It means the world to me." He replied in a similar voice, Anaise stirred a little on his chest but didn't wake up. "She must have had a pretty action-packed day at school today." I mused, moving a little on the bed so I could lightly poke her pudgy cheek, the tiniest of smiles emerged onto her face as one emerged on mine.

Suzuno sighed. And I knew the reason.
"It's just awful. I mean, you never think it's going to happen and then-"
"I know. I bought some flowers and a card at lunch. I was thinking we should go this evening, Kazemaru said he might be there. I'd like to give him some support." My husband nodded at my suggestion, placing a hand on Anaise's back protectively. "Just wondering about her..." He added, just as our precious daughter woke up.

"Daddy, Papa?" Suzuno sat up and she looked at the two of us, rubbing her eyes blearily before smiling widely "I just had a dream!"
"And what was that dream about apple blossom?"
She was smiling from ear-to-ear now. "I was dreaming about baby brother! And how he was so cute and called me Big Sis, and loved me so much, and you too!" She said happily, Suzuno's face was a picture. She laughed a little at his expression before crawling off of him and making her way over to me.

"So you'd like a baby brother then?" I asked and she giggled cutely "Yep! Then JoJo and me can be his mummies!" Suzuno gave her a strange look and I remembered that he'd never actually met our daughter's BFF yet. Before I could explain, Anaise laughed, pushing my arm playfully "Only Joking!"

She crawled back over to my husband before looking up at him. "Nine months."
"Eh?"
She placed a hand on his belly. "Nine months until baby brother is born!"
Suzuno went as red as a tomato. "Uh, that's not how it works-"
"Only Joking!" She proclaimed before falling about laughing like she was the funniest kid in the whole world.

"Heh, Fuusuke you should see your face right now." I said, laughing myself, he went even redder "Alright apple blossom, I'll get you for that!"
And thus, a tickle war ensued.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Hey, did you hear, about Yuuki and Jousuke? There's no invites out yet, but you are coming, right?" I looked at him, subconsciously tilting his head to the side and letting those pretty cyan locks cover his face ever-so-slightly. I pulled my eyes off of him, turning my back and instead fishing around for some painkillers. "Han?" I cringed, wishing he'd stop calling me that, only Max called me that.
I tensed up as he repeated his question.

"Kazemaru..." I placed my hands firmly on the countertop, still not looking at him. I took a deep breath, but he got there first "Because I think it would do you good, to take your mind off of..."
"Take my mind off of Max? How can I Kazemaru, he's all I've got. How can I...pretend to be happy for them when..." I whispered, feeling my fists clench and unclench.

"Okay...I'll ask again closer to the time."
"My answer will be the same."
He just sighed before mumbling about needing to leave before it started getting dark, even though it had only just gone four. I didn't blame him, I wouldn't want to be around myself and my negativity either. He got to the door before turning around, placing a hand on my shoulder "If you ever want to talk, you know how to reach me."
"I'll think about it." He gave me a frustrated look but it soon softened. "Please do Han, I want to help." He pulled me into a hug, I found myself holding onto him tightly, as if I was afraid if I let go, I would lose him forever. After a prolonged time I finally let go of him, watching as he walked away.

I closed the door, the house was so cold and lonely. "Well I should probably apologise to Tsuuki for being a no-show at work today..."

(Later-8.30 pm)
I looked down at his body. So lifeless. So still. Lightly, I brought my hand over his hair, the way Kazemaru had done it 'I'm trying to keep you relaxed buddy. Is it working? I hope it's working.' A strained laugh fell from my lips, I was being stupid. I walked around to the side table, a card and flowers? From who? "Nagumo, Suzuno and...Anaise. Oh right, their daughter....gosh I, I didn't even think they knew I existed..." They must have been here earlier... I placed the flowers in a vase on the windowsill, pouring some water into it.

There was something else on the table, it was quite small and wrapped in christmas paper. It had my name on it. I hurriedly unwrapped it, picking up the note: I saw this today and thought it might be useful to you, I know you said you didn't want to talk about it, and that's fine. But this way, you can at least talk to him. It's good to talk Han. He'll wake up before you know it, your friend, Kaze x

A voice recorder.
'I think they're called dictophones...'

I looked back over at my boyfriend, feeling tears prick at my eyes. "Thank you, Kaze..." I glanced back at the window, at the peaceful night that coincided with the soft whirring of machines in the room, it was like some peace had finally washed over me.

"Uh, I didn't know you'd be here."

I tensed. 'No. Not now, this has to be a joke.'
"I'm sorry Han, I only just found out and-"
"Get out."
I couldn't even bring myself to look at him. "What?"
"I said. Get out."
His footsteps echoed as he came towards me "Han please, please don't do this." I gritted my teeth and spun around, tears threatening to spill. "You have no right to be here, this is all your fault!" I said, the tears falling, he frowned opening his arms as if to hug me-I swatted him away.

"Han please, baby, don't say that-"
"I'm not your baby! Don't you dare ever call me that again!" I almost yelled, but I was conscious of the fact that this was a hospital. He held out his hands in panic "Sorry! I didn't mean to, it just slipped out! Han, I only just found out what happened, I just came over to deliver these gifts and-and you just yell at me saying it's all my fault!" He protested, I took in a breath, I needed to calm down...

"Someoka...I'm sorry." It was all I could muster, my fists were clenching. He nodded, relieved and put the gifts on the small table, I felt so numb. That was, until he gently touched my arm, it felt like electricity, except, not the good kind. Not the kind of electricity I used to feel when I was with him, the kind that just makes you feel uncomfortable all over, like you're doing something wrong and you know you're going to get caught. I wasn't paying enough attention as before I knew it, he was hugging me.

One hand was at the base of my neck, the other on my lower back, his warm breath on my ear. I couldn't seem to move, the electricity was so horrible, stifling, and yet it was intoxicating, I was paralysed- stuck between the feelings of wanting to get rid of him and wanting more of him.

"S-Someoka." The tears ran down my face. "Please, get off me..."
"I don't know if I can."
"Please..." I whispered, trying to overt my eyes from Max's still form. "P-please..."
Finally, he listened, releasing me. We both looked at the floor, neither of us daring to say a word. He left a few moments later.

'Fuck.'