On the way to the cinema, Louis was having an internal conversation with himself. More like a battle. He was debating the pros and cons of acting on his abnormal feelings towards Harry. Last night had made him think and didn't let him sleep. That sudden jealousy and anger and pure frustration but at the same time the need to be on good terms with him was all so new to him and he wasn't quite sure what it was. He couldn't identify the feelings he had for his friend. Or maybe he didn't want to because it would be pointless. So, he had made the decision to not act on his confusion and strange feelings. They were only watching a superhero movie. How bad could it be?

Apparently, pretty bad. Not only did Harry pay for both of them like it was some kind of a stupid date. No, he ended up next to him with their hands touching in the popcorn bowl as well. And at that moment Louis was wondering when his life has turned into a romantic cliché movie. And since when was he the main character? That really didn't seem right.

The movie in itself seemed to be alright but Louis wasn't able to focus on the actual plot for one second. And that annoyed him the most. He wanted to watch the freaking movie and not focus on Harry. Harry, who was sitting way too close to him on their love seat. Yes, love seat. These sneaky little bitches he called his friends had reserved two love seats for them in the back of the cinema. Now they were cuddling while watching the movie and Louis was doomed to die from a panic attack. Great.

There was a love story plotline in the movie that made Louis feel uneasy. Two people being too scared to make a move but obviously being into each other. That did not sound familiar and Louis refused to acknowledge that.

"How can someone be this oblivious?" asked Harry him in a quiet whisper.

"Huh?" was the only thing Louis was able to respond.

"She's so into him and he doesn't get it. Isn't she obvious enough with her caring?" went Harry into more detail but all Louis could feel was his breath on his neck.

"But he is obvious as well with his jealousy, don't you think? She could make the first move instead of him" pointed Louis out, not even knowing if that made sense with the movie.

"She's probably scared of getting hurt. Loving someone can be scary" mused Harry softly.

"He's not any better. Scared shitless of getting rejected again" marked Louis idiotically.

"Looks like they should talk about their fears and work on them together, mh?" could Louis feel Harry's eyes on him.

"They should" looked Louis up at him fondly.

"Are they even watching the movie?" heard Louis how Maribel was asking this in the distance.

"I don't think so" caught Louis Kayla's response.

"That's where you're wrong, Kay. I'm watching the movie" turned Louis to his friend as quietly as possible.

"Oh yeah? What just happened?" challenged Kayla him.

"They figured it out" stated Louis simply.

"It?" looked Maribel confused.

"A way to communicate through their issues without feeling naked in the open" intervened Harry now.

"That's really not what ha ...".

"Good for them then, I guess" cut Kayla her girlfriend off.

"Really good" agreed Louis and Harry at the same time.

"Idiots" murmured Maribel to herself.

For the rest of the movie, the popcorn was put aside and Louis and Harry were cuddled up together. With his head on Harry's chest, Louis could feel Harry's heartbeat and damn, it was almost jumping out of his chest. It felt like Harry was about to get a panic attack but at the same time, he was totally relaxed. It made no sense whatsoever but Louis felt exactly the same, wondering why Harry wasn't the one cuddling up to his chest. It was a stupid question but he couldn't shake it away anyway. Was Harry thinking Louis always needed to be protected and that he was weak? In need or submissive? If, then Harry was wrong. But maybe Louis was overthinking this simple position right now and saw problems where they were none.

Awkwardly avoiding to look Harry in the eye, Louis rushed out of the room when the movie was over. He sprinted into the restroom and locked himself in a stall, needing a wee. When he was done he washed his hands and splashed some water into his face. He needed a clear head.

"Thought you were here. Going during a movie is shit, mh?" appeared Harry behind him, Louis only seeing him in the mirror and trying not to freak out.

"There is never a good moment. You simply don't wanna miss anything. In the dark, you lose sense of reality somehow but it comes crushing back down on you when the lights turn back on" replied Louis mysteriously, wanting to slap himself.

"But some things that happened in the protection of the dark won't fade in the light. Maybe they're even clearer in the open light of the day" touched Harry Louis' shoulder, making him turn around and when did they fucking start to talk in riddles or metaphors?

"You really think so?" found Louis himself asking against his will.

"I know so. You helped me to understand that, Lou" stepped Harry closer to him.

"You're amazing, Haz" blurted Louis out, clearing his throat right after and breaking out of the touch. "We should go and find the girls, mh?!".

Totally embarrassed, Louis scrambled out of the restroom, looking for Maribel and Kayla. He spotted them waiting at a table close to the snack bar. Probably looking crazy as hell, he stumbled over to them, signalling without words for them to not ask any questions. They understood immediately.

When Harry finally reappeared from the restroom, the four of them left the cinema building and walked into the park. Out of nowhere, Maribel and Harry started running towards a little playground but Louis couldn't risk hurting his ankle again, so he stayed back and just watched. Together with Kayla, he sat down on the swings. He had always loved them but never had much time to enjoy being a kid.

"Is everything alright between you two?" checked Kayla carefully.

"Why shouldn't it be?" coughed Louis suspiciously.

"Because you both seem to be pretty tense. What happened in the toilets?" Kayla wanted to know nosily.

"Nothing. I'm just making things complicated because I'm me. Our friendship is so important to me. I don't wanna risk losing him over stupid confusion" started Louis to swing back and forth.

"Overthinking is something I'm an expert in. So let me tell you sometimes it's better to just feel it" advised Kayla him.

"But ...".

"No buts, Louis" cut Kayla him off. "If I would have listened to all the buts in my head Belle wouldn't be my girlfriend right now".

"How did that happen anyway?" walked Harry over to them. "I did not listen to your conversation. I just heard her saying something about Maribel, I swear on my life. On my mother".

"I believe you, Haz. No need to swear on anything" smiled Louis genuinely at him, being touched by Harry's mentioning of his mother.

"You still wanna know the answer?" looked Kayla questioningly at the two of them.

"Yes".

"Remember our trip to Famumria?" started Kayla to tell their story. Both boys nodded. "I've liked her for a very long time but I've been too scared to do anything about it for various reasons. The usual fear of rejection mixed with doubting myself. I wasn't sure if I was good enough for her and if she could ever love someone like me. Some people are simply not comfortable with dating a transgender person, so I was terrified".

"But she had no reason to be scared" hugged Maribel her from behind. "I've been gone for her since forever and was equally as scared without having a good reason apart from not wanting to risk our friendship or making it weird for Àmber, which was the weirdest excuse ever because she has been rooting for us the whole time".

"Moral of the story. Sometimes overthinking leads to nothing and it is completely in vain. Look at what's right in front of you and take a risk. It will be worth it" concluded Kayla wisely.

"And if it ends badly you're one experience richer or whatever those German people say. Every defeat makes you stronger in some way but not trying at all is the worst failure" gave Maribel her own laughing advice.

"True, Princess" pecked Kayla Maribel's lips. "Race you to the slides".

"Ey!" shouted Maribel after her when Kayla quickly ran off without a warning. "Excuse me for a second".

Louis watched them with a shaking head. "They're weird but really adorable together".

"Very true, Lou" agreed Harry with him sweetly.

In unison, the two of them sat down on the grass and watched their loved-up friends. It was a joy to see them this happy. But it also made him sad. Would he ever be able to have this? Would he ever be able to conquer his fears?

"You wanna join them or stay here?" asked Harry attentively, watching Maribel and Kayla chasing each other on the climbing frame.

"Let's not get involved in something that requires running or climbing or anything that could ...".

"Then we stay here, Lou" interrupted Harry him, placing one hand on Louis' ankle hesitantly.

"It's not like I never do anything like this. I just ... There is so much ahead of me. I don't wanna jinx it. One simple wrong move could be too much" was Louis wrestling for the right words to describe his situation, trying not to come off as boring or inactive.

"You really don't have to explain yourself. I understand, Lou. One step at a time. Besides, maybe it's better to leave them alone. Look" pointed Harry at the girls being very close to each other.

"I don't wanna see any of that" shuddered Louis dramatically.

"Me neither but I'm happy for them. It's interesting to see the difference between them as friends and girlfriends. They literally act the same" observed Harry them closely.

"They've been pretty close before. They just added some kissing and stuff and not having to deal with watching the other flirt with strangers or get jealous over nothing. They're way more relaxed now although they've been so scared and I see why they were scared. Who wouldn't be?" started Louis rambling without noticing it, spilling all of his thoughts. "I mean, putting yourself out there with no safety net is scary as shit. You never know if you come out whole or broken and if you've already been broken before it's hard to decide whether it's worth another try or not. Could you handle another broken heart or would it break you completely?!".

What the hell was he doing? Why was he saying all of this stupid nonsense? This was far from being about Kayla and Maribel and if Harry was smart he would notice this. How could he bare himself like this without realising it? He didn't dare to look at Harry. He really wasn't keen on seeing his face right now. The pure rejection.

"I see why someone would be scared of rejection, considering all of that" took Harry a hold of Louis' hand surprisingly, making Louis look directly into his eyes. "But do you think there is anything one could do to prove they're serious and won't hurt them because they're equally as scared of ever loving someone due to them losing their whole family? Is there any chance?".

With a lump in his throat, Louis swallowed heavily. Harry's words held so much meaning and Louis wasn't dumb. He knew they weren't talking about the girls or some stupid nameless example anymore. They were talking in brutal honesty about themselves without ever really saying anything in case they would be rejected or hurt. That made his head hurt. Why were they like this? Why couldn't they just be honest this one time without having a backdoor, a way out if it would go wrong? Why were they such cowards?

"There's always a chance, Haz" whispered Louis softly, not wanting to break what they had. "I just don't wanna be broken again. I couldn't handle it".

There it was. Out there. He had dropped the made-up persona and had thrown away his protecting shield. Now only his vulnerable heart was left in the open, terrified of what could happen next. Harry's face wasn't really showing any answer to his millions of questions.

"Me neither, Lou" replied Harry just as quiet as Louis himself finally after several minutes of just staring.

"What happens now?" Louis needed to know insecurely.

"I don't know" bit Harry down on his bottom lip.

Fortunately, the girls came back over to them right at that moment and broke their whatever it was. Louis was thankful for that because he wasn't sure where to go from here. Had they really just admitted what he thought they did or was he reading too much into this? Judging by the way Harry was staring at him in shock and confusion but also fond Louis couldn't be so wrong, right?

Because it was getting late and dark, the four of them went home. They parted ways at the front door of Louis and Harry's apartment building and the two boys headed inside in silence. It was weird and Louis had no clue how to act now. They were friends who might felt something more if he wasn't mistaken. They could still talk to each other normally like they did before, right?

Nope, it didn't seem like it. Standing at Louis' front door, they were both silent, looking everywhere but the other's eyes. This was getting ridiculous and if Harry wasn't doing anything then Louis would. He needed Harry in his life, talking to him and not being mute together. No, this was not what he wanted. He needed to do something. He needed to break the silence.

"If you don't talk to me within the next minute I will open this door and disappear without another word and might not contact you ever again. So ..." spoke Louis up challengingly.

"No, don't" rushed Harry out, turning crimson. "Please, don't. I'm sorry that I'm making this awkward".

"You need two for that but I decided to end this here and now" unlocked Louis his door.

"End what?" crept fear onto Harry's face.

"The awkwardness, dumb nut. I wanna hear your voice. This uncomfortable silence is not our thing. We had an amazing day with our friends and watched a great movie. I'd love to do that again. With you. Anytime" clarified Louis determinant.

"Me too. Oh, and how much I'd like to do that. We could ..." started Harry beaming but then his phone went off. "Urgh, that's Andrew. I should probably answer him".

"You do you. See you tomorrow, Haz" opened Louis the door to his flat.

"I could pick you up from work and we can get some ice cream" suggested Harry hopefully.

"Count me in" accepted Louis smilingly.

"Amazing. See you tomorrow, Lou" pulled Harry him into his arms for a tight hug.

"Good night, Haz" mumbled Louis into Harry's neck, breathing in his sent.

"Good night, Lou" pressed Harry a short but gentle kiss to Louis' right cheek before he left.

Blinking dumbfounded, Louis touched the spot where Harry had kissed him and stared after his disappearing figure, hearing him call Andrew back. Maybe he even blushed a little bit but he would never admit that. With a silly smile on his face, Louis walked into his flat, feeling like everything was falling into place. He had no reason to be afraid anymore.

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Question of the Chapter: Are they understanding each other or are they talking past one another?