Cobra Kai S3 / life would be such a bright place if I was allowed to love you

There is a lump in my throat the size of a cherry pit and I haven't been able to swallow it since I was thirteen. In this dream, I am young again and August is eating me alive but no one's noticing. I spend the days sleeping on pillows with tear stains and giving myself to boys who don't love me. I'm getting sick but I don't know what that means yet. Mom and dad have started to sleep in separate beds and my guts bleed every time I say family.