“I have something for you.”
“Huh? What is it?”
“It’s a letter. Nicole wanted you to have it. I wanted to give it to you earlier but the timing wasn’t just right. You were in so much grief and I didn’t know if the letter would make you feel worse, so I decided to keep it till I was sure you were stronger.”
“There are two envelopes in your hand.”
“Yeah. She wrote one for me.”
“Mom wrote you a letter? Hmm. You must have been special to her.” I smiled.
“Come on Roman, open it.” She handed me the envelope with my name on it. “I could leave you alone for a while to read it.”
“No. Don’t be silly. You are my wife now. We’ll read it together, better still, I will read it aloud.”
“Okay.” Amora said and tucked her hair behind her ear and I read.
Dear son,
You are the best gift I was given and I couldn’t be more grateful. I’m so proud of the man you’ve grown up to become. Please don’t be sad for me. Go on son, live your life. Allow yourself to be happy and open up your heart to forgive the people who have hurt you, especially your dad. Only then will you truly be at peace. Take care of Amora. Never make her cry and never leave her side. Someone like her only happens once in a lifetime. I’m sure you know that already. I hate that I have to leave but I’m very happy to have spent my last days on this earth with you. I love you so much my son.
Till we meet again.
Mom.
I looked up at Amora and something glistened in her eyes. Love, it was love. Love for me. I stretched and kissed her deeply.
“Let’s read yours?”
Amora opened her letter and read.
Amora,
My beautiful Amora. I’ve only known you for some weeks but it feels like a lifetime. You know exactly how to make me laugh and I feel better each time we talk. You are the answer to my prayer, Amora. I will miss you terribly. Always take care of yourself and Roman too. He needs you more than he knows. I hope you are smiling as you are reading this letter because your smiles brought joy to my heart.
Love, Nicole.
After we read those letters, we didn’t say anything to each other. We didn’t have to. We understood ourselves even in our silence. Amora snuggled up to me and I just held her. Her presence filled me. It warmed my heart.
                     ______________
“Oh…look how cute you were as a baby.” Amora chirped and she saw my baby pictures.
“I’m still very cute.” I said playfully.
“Of course you are. Else I wouldn’t have married you.” She teased.
“So you married me because you think I’m cute.” I ambushed her from the back and pulled her to myself, biting her ears and her neck.
“Roman,” she grinned. “Even if you look like an ogre, I would still marry you because you are the only man in the entire world for me. Your good looks is just a bonus. You were made especially for me.”
“And how do you know that?” I asked, her back still pressed to me as I held her by her waist.
“Here.” Amora pointed at the left side of her chest. I smiled and spinning her around, she fell on my chest. “You make me dizzy.”
“I do?”
“Yes. So dizzy, with everything you do to me. It feels like I’m in a never ending roller-coaster.”
“Roller-coaster huh? So this dizziness I cause you, is it a good one or a bad one?” I joked.
“Definitely a good one.”
“Then Amora, prepare to be dizzy for as long as we will be together, for eternity I hope.”
                          _______________
“She’s right you know?”
“Huh?”
“Your mom. About your dad? Maybe you should try to forgive him. Hate is bad for the soul, Roman.”
“Amora, let’s not talk about this.”
“Roman. Just talk to him. He might have a reason for staying away, an explanation or something.”
“Are you defending him?” I asked with raised brows.
“I’m not. All I’m saying is just talk to him.”
“Let’s say I agree to talk to him, I don’t even know where the man lives.”
“I do.” She said.
“You do. How?”
“After you asked him to leave on the day of Nicole’s funeral, I followed him and we spoke and I asked him for his address.”
“Jesus Amora.”
“Let’s go see him Roman. Please?” she pleaded and made a sad face that I always totally fell for.
“Fine.”
                  ________________
It took hours of driving before Amora and I arrived at the address my dad had given her. After we had asked around a bit, we finally found the house. I was skeptical about being there. What explanation could he possibly give for abandoning his family?
“You can do this Roman. I have faith in you.” Amora said and gave me a reassuring nudge. I took a very deep breath and then knocked on the front door. A young man that looked like he was in his early twenties or less answered the door.
“Yes?” he asked.
I stood there rooted to the ground unable to move or speak. The young man in front of me bore a striking resemblance to my dad and I didn’t need a crystal ball to know he was my dad’s son.
“Elm…we are here to see Leonard. Is he in?” Amora came to my rescue.
“Um…” the young man was confused.
“Tell him it’s Amora. And Roman.” Amora said again.
A minute later, the door swung open and my dad was there, standing in front of me.
“Please come in.” he said.
I didn’t have the time to notice the interior decoration of his living room. I didn’t really care. I just came to talk and disappear.
“Roman, thank you so much for coming.”
“Don’t flatter yourself. I’m only here because of Amora.” I said my hands crossed on my chest.
I saw hurt in his eyes, even through the glasses he wore. “Thank you Amora.”
“You said you had an explanation. I’m listening.” I blurted out coldly.
He sighed. “Can we all at least sit down?”
And we did. We all sat down.
“I’m listening.” I said again.
“I messed up. I messed up really bad and not a single day passes that I don’t regret leaving you and your mother. I was stupid. She got pregnant for me, the woman I cheated on your mother with. We had a baby and after a month, she disappeared, leaving me alone with the child. Roman I wanted to come back to you and your mother but I was ashamed and afraid Nicole would never forgive me and I was afraid she wasn’t going to accept my child with another woman. I was the only person that baby had, so I chose to stay with him, to raise him. I chose to stay away. I was a coward and I deserve it all. Your resentment and anger. I deserve it all.” He removed his glasses and wiped off the tears in his face. “Please forgive me my son. Please forgive me.”
My chest swelled with emotions and I felt all the hate I walked through that door slowly melting away. I knew then that I was going to forgive him. I closed my eyes and the tears that filled them fell.
“You underestimated her. My mom. She would have accepted you and your son. You underestimated her love for you. Does he know? Your son. Does he know about mom and me?”
“Yes. Yes he does. I told him everything. Roman, I’m begging you, please find it in your heart to forgive me.”
I heaved a sigh of defeat and surrender. Amora won. “What’s the point in hating you when mom didn’t hate you for a single day? When the person you hurt the most couldn’t hate you. There’s no point.”
“Are you saying there is a chance you might forgive me?” He asked and immediately sat up straight in anticipation of my answer.
“I forgive you dad. I forgive you.” It was a lot easier than I had thought, saying those words and meaning them.
My dad reached for my hand and held them. “Thank you. Thank you son. Thank you.”
“Amora and I got married.” I told him.
“Wonderful. Congratulations. Amora, thank you for what you have done for me. I owe you a huge debt.”
“It’s nothing sir.” Amora said for the first time and then my father’s son walked into the sitting room.
“Hello brother.” He said. “My name is Luke.”
Brother. Talk about enough surprises for one year.
“Hey Luke. I’m Roman and this is my wife Amora.” I said nervously.
He walked to me and shook my hand and then he embraced Amora.
“I’ve always wanted to meet you and your mom. She sounded very lovely. I’m sorry you lost her.”
“Yeah. Thanks. It’s nice to meet Luke.”
Luke turned out very okay. He was studying to be a doctor and he did become a doctor. In a very short while, we developed a bond and it grew as the years went by.
“My favorite brother in law.” Amora always called him.
“He is your only brother in law.” I always replied.