I was already not happy to begin with.

You might not know it, but suddenly transforming into a Pokemon and waking up across the region from your hometown is very stressful.

So nearly getting deep fried and served on a platter definitely wasn't exactly gonna make me burst with happiness.

Let's go back a little.

I walked alongside the guy, who was whistling quite loudly. It wasn't quite like his deplorable singing quality, but it was fairly annoying.

As I mentioned, I was miffed. I had a long way to go to get back home. I was tired, my body didn't like walking the way it was, and I was just plain tired.

I was going to probably start complaining out loud when a he gave a loud cry. "HO! What might that be in the distance?"

I rolled my eyes at his insistence on being a complete dope. I looked up and saw a large building. It was in front of the sun, so it was more of a silhouette. It was fairly simple and rectangular in shape. As we came closer, it became clearer. It was a cream colored brick, with blue awnings and windows. I could see a sign above the awning, which called it the Seven Stars Hotel.

"Aye! This will be an excellent place to stay the night. And perhaps get a bite to eat!" He smiled.

I frowned, looking the place over. "Are you sure? This place looks like it might be pretty pricey."

"I'm sure it will be nothing! Come on!" He rushed us inside.

On the inside, it was nicely decorated, with fancy furniture, and several tables with people sitting at them. As we entered, a waiter came up to us.

"Hello, sir! Welcome to the Seven Stars Hotel! Might you be interested in enjoying our wonderful dinner menu?"

"That sounds great!" The guy smiled. 

"Excellent. May I have your name so that I may inform you when your table is ready?"

"Of course! My name is Edward!"

Ed, huh? Nice name.

"Very well. I will be right back." He hurried off.

I have to say, I was already impressed with the service, but that also made me worried, because this level of quality could only come from a place that's really expensive, or Mexican (trust me, I've eaten at those places. They're all dead serious about the job).

The guy came back a few minutes later. "Thank you so much, sir. Right this way."

He guided us to a table and sat us down.

"Shall you like to start with some Pokemon food for your Vaporeon there?" He asked as we were getting settled.

I was going to speak up, (completely forgetting about trying to keep this a secret) but thankfully Ed spoke up first.

"Of course! He loves the stuff!" He ruffled my head.

Remove the parentheses and the word thankfully from that sentence above there.

As the man walked off, I looked at him, glaring. "The least you could do is order me something decent."

"What? You are a Pokemon."

I rolled my eyes.

After he had ordered his food and we had sat there for a few minutes, it came out.

I looked and was quite surprised at the hefty load he had ordered, but then looking at his body shape I realized I probably shouldn't have been.

I snuck a little bit under my paw and took a bite. For a second it tasted really good. Then my stomach began to feel like it had been put on a spin cycle. I held in what I could, then looking at his empty cup, let all hell loose into the pristine, clear cup.

A waiter came by, and picked up the glass without really looking at it.

A few seconds later, my ears picked up a small shriek, and there was the sound of glass breaking.

I looked down at the Pokemon food. It didn't look all that appealing, it was just brown blobs.

I looked back up and considered just making the whole meal an enjoyable time of freaking out waiters.

I picked one of the blobs up and put it in my mouth.

HOLY FREAKIN S**T THAT'S GOOD!!!!

Ahem. Allow me to compose myself.

Eh. Not bad.

I began eating them more quickly. I was a little bit sad that I wouldn't be able to eat pizza or something like that for now, but this stuff would do in the meantime.

I looked up when my ears picked up slight footsteps. I saw a man in a tan suit, with a white hat and sunglasses. He was my definition of fancy.

I hate fancy.

He seemed to be looking at me.

"Excuse me, sir, but is this your Vaporeon?"

Ed looked up. "Why yes it is!"

He looked me over. I looked back, and the awkwardness made it fairly clear he was scanning my entire form.

He suddenly smiled and stepped back. "Well then if you are in possession of such a rare and beautiful Pokemon, I suppose I simply must battle you!"

Ed and I nearly both spit our food across the table at each other.

"What!?" We both exclaimed. Well, he said it out loud. I had Pokemon food in my mouth, so it just kinda came out as muffled gibberish.

A waiter came over. "Why yes sir. Our restaurant not only offers the highest quality of service and food, but we also have an exceptional Pokemon battle arena." We looked over. Several tables began to slide towards the outside. When we looked at the center, a large arena appeared from the ground.

Wow. These people mean business.

Ed smiled and grabbed his Pokeballs. "Excellent! Let's go-" I gave him a look that told him his fate if he tried to bring me into this.

He smiled, clearly embarrassed. He ran over to one side of the battlefield. Mr. Fancy Pants did the same.

One of the waiters came over to the side of the battlefield. I was fully prepared to go to the bathroom for a little while this was going on, but a waiter came by and refilled my bowl.

I suddenly felt new incentive to stay.

The waiter started the battle. The man threw a Pokeball. "Ponyta, come out!" The fire horse emerged, and neighed loudly.

Ed reached for one of the Pokeballs. I realized I had no idea what his Pokemon were.

"Go, Geodude!" The rock shaped Pokemon appeared. I smiled. Maybe he was smart. He was well set with that Pokemon.

"Ponyta, use Double Kick!" I cringed as I took a bite out of a delectable brown chunk. Ponyta landed the Fighting type move on Geodude easily with its higher speed.

Geodude thankfully survived, and it was an opportunity for Ed to use a move.

"Geodude, MUD SLAP!!"

I almost died.

Of all the f-ing moves he could teach his Geodude, and to choose to use, MUD...FREAKIN...SLAP.

Needless to say, Ponyta didn't exactly get overwhelmed by the attack. It followed up with another Double Kick, and Geodude fainted.

I sighed and tried to look like I wasn't supposed to be his Pokemon.

He pulled out another Pokeball.

"Shieldon, Go!!" He threw the ball, and the small little thing emerged. I don't even know what to call a Shieldon. It's just a thing.

Ponyta struck first again, this time with an Ember attack. It was surprisingly powerful, but Shieldon held its own.

"Use Take Down!" I was reasonably impressed with the move choice, given his first attack.

But Shieldon charged with about the speed of a slightly miffed tortoise. Ponyta sidestepped the attack with ease.

The worst part? The recoil from missing FINISHED SHIELDON OFF.

I buried my head in my food, partially to avoid shame, and partially to indulge myself.

The man smiled. "All right! Your next Pokemon."

Ed got a look on his face. I read it in an instant.

He only had two Pokemon.

He looked over at me.

I shook my head frantically, whispering to myself, Nonononononononono...

Ed grabbed me and took me to the battlefield.

"Good!" The man smiled, seeing his choice. "I had hoped to see its strength."

F-you, man. Eff. You.

"Ponyta, use Stomp!"

As the flaming horse charged at me, I cowered in fear, this time mentally screaming, NONONONONONO!!!!!