Krrish

I opened my eyes as I woke up and felt someone snuggling to me. I looked beside to find that familiar figure leaning close to my body. Her arms were on my chest and mine were around her. I smiled remembering about what happened last night. It's not that we haven't been physically involved. But last night, it was beyond amazing. Last night, we made love with each other without protection. Yes, we decided to take our relationship in the next level where we both were going to enjoy the ecstasy of parenthood.

I placed a kiss on her forehead when a cute scowl appeared on her face as she pouted remaining slept. I traced my finger from her face to her nose when a mischievous idea came on my head. I decided to tease her. So I slowly rubbed her nose with one of my fingers and she groaned. She then opened her eyes and a small smile tugged up into her lips.

"Good morning ,baby." I said while tucking a hairstrand behind her ear.

"Good Morning, Krrish." She said yawning. When she tried to get up,she noticed that she was just in my shirt. She blushed making me smirked. I supported my body by leaning on my elbow.

"U r blushing, Mrs Chauhan." I teased her.

"Umm...no...I am not blushing. " She shuttered avoiding to make any eye-contact with me.

"Yeah, I can see that." I said and pulled her on me. She squealed and hide her face on my chest.

"Thanks for yesterday night. I loved each and every moment of it." I said genuinely feeling already glad to complete our first step towards being a father.

"Same to u." She said and kissed on my bare chest. We both hugged each other tightly and stayed in that position for the next few minutes.

"Ok, now let's go. We should get ready. Ritika and Karan r surely waiting for us." She said and got up. She grabbed her clothes from the closet when I just sat on the bed on my boxer scrolling through the phone. She kissed my cheeks and went in the washroom where I too decided to take out my clothes from the closet. I began to look for my white shirt which I was going to wear today for office but to my bad luck , I didn't find it. Ruhi always keeps organized our room and clothes everything otherwise I used to have messy room. Not getting the shirt, I called for Ruhi's help.

"Ruhi, where have u kept my white shirt ? I am not finding it on the closet."

"Idiot!! I have already given to Ramu uncle white shirt for washing yesterday. So I don't know where he has kept that shirt. I think that u could have taken the blue shirt. It's on the upper drawer of the closet." I heard her shouting.I huffed and decided to take the blue shirt.

I pulled out the upper drawer and found the blue shirt there. I took out the shirt humming a song. All of a sudden, my gaze fell on a blue covered diary, Ruhi's name was written on the top of it. I clutched the diary as a strong smell hot on my nostrils. I guess that it's old diary. I didn't know that she used to write diary. I was going to flip the first page when I heard the door opening. I immediately hide the diary behind my back nervously when Ruhi came in my view. She was wearing a grey coloured thigh length rob. My eyes shamelessly scanned her body. She came infront of me with a small smile. I couldn't help but capture her lips for kiss placing one arm around her hips. The kiss lasted for a few seconds before she pulled away and ran from there blushing.
*******
From the morning itself, I absolutely was being unable to concentrate on my works as I was only thinking to get an opportunity and read the diary. Yeah, u r right. I had braught the diary with me and I just wanted to to read it. But time and works were not allowing me. I wanted to read what she had written on the diary. I really didn't have any idea why I was getting restless to have a look of a simple diary which I could read any time. I was just waiting for the break time when I could be able to read the content of the diary.

I sighed in relief as finally the break time had arrived. I instantly opened the diary and started to read the pages.

Hii Diary,

This is my first time to curve my feelings on this diary. I am in class 8 now. One of my friends suggested me this idea. She told that if I felt suffocated then I should share everything with someone and I know that "someone" could be a person also. But still, I feel awkward to share everything with my friend as he is 2 years older than me. So I decided to go for u.

Yeah, his name is Krrish. He is very sweet boy. He takes care of me like my grandmother. I love my grandmother a lot as she is the backbone of my small family. She is the reason , I am surviving in this world. I want to give her all happiness. These two persons r very special to me and they will stay special.

Late Happy New Year ❤

3rd January, 2008

I jumped in happiness internally on how she hadn't forgot to mention me as her special one. Then I continued reading some more pages where she had literally scribbled each and every lovely and sad moments of her. She had also said how much she missed her parents and heaved a strong mourn over them throughout this diary. I really felt sorry for her.

Hi Diary,

Today I will say u the deepest secret of me. None knows about it. Not even Krrish. Well, it's about him only.

Today I have realized one thing that "I LOVE KRRISH".

My heart skipped a beat and my eyes widened in absolute shock as I stared at the three words for sometimes before beginning to read again.

Yeah , I know that I am too young to love someone. But does love come seeing your age and maturity only ? I don't know how and when I just have got emotionally attached with him. The way he cares for me ,the way he soothes me,the way he always teases me and the way he alway stays by my side...uh...I feel butterflies whenever he kisses. I don't know about him if he shares the same feeling as me or not. Whatever it is ,I know one thing that he is a good guy and my best friend. I know that he will never be the reason of my sadness. I don't know how I am supposed to confess either. It's ridiculous. I don't know how I fell for him this deep that I didn't notice myself. Damn, I  am feeling shy. I won't write more.

Ok, bye. Good Night

5th September, 2008

My throat went dry knowing such a big truth of her which she hide from me for ages. I swallowed at the new-born sensation which was happening in myself reading it. I drank a glass of water.
What!! She loved me!! Then why didn't she tell me ? Why Ruhi? Why did u do it ? Am I too bad to be known about your feelings?

Recovering from the starte, I continued to read more where she only curved her feelings for me and also mentioned how I was never gonna reciprocate the same feeling and would be unknown about my best friend's crush on me. I closed my eyes in frustration. 

Why Ruhi? Why me either ? Why did I never notice how she was trying to gain my attention back ? Why did I refuse to acknowledge my true feelings? If I would not be that much stupid, today I wouldn't have to see this day.

Hi Diary,

Let's be practical. Today I tried to give him signs by trying to be physically closer with him. But he just said "R u mad ?". Like seriously, he made me insane.I want to propose him but boys should approach first. Am I right ? But I am still not sure whether he likes me in that way or not. I have refused so many boy friends of mine for that reason. Honestly, I feel like third wheel when my both of girl best friends always hang with boys sometimes making out infront me. Ewww , that's gross.

I just hope that oneday he will say that he too loves me.

May be

Just may be....a small hope....

Ok, enough of my rants. I will talk later. I have Maths exam tomorrow.

17th November, 2008

I don't know what I should feel right now. On that time, she loved me. If she would tell me then I wouldn't refuse her atleast for sure. I don't know if I would reciprocate the same feelings then but I wouldn't let her be dejected and I would accept her proposal. Atleast she didn't need to suffer so much then. Why all of these happened?

Hi Diary,

What do I say today ? I have nothing left to say. Do u know what, Krrish has called me and talking to him, I felt that he reciprocate the same feeling. Today at the canteen, he has kissed me on cheeks and forehead for thrice infront of all. Uff, I am blushing. And now he just called me and said that he was going to tell something very special to me. And guess what I think that he will propose me.

Uff, I am so excited. Can't wait to meet him.

Ok, I guess that I am not gonna sleep today in those thoughts roaming around my brain.

Bye.

4 June,2009

Oh God, it's the moment when I called her to say about Ankita. I guess so. And she thought that I was going to propose her. I am afraid that the next page is going to tell something very painful memory of her. How much I have hurt this poor soul. I pinched the bridge of my nose and ran my hand through my hairs frustratingly.

Why ?

She had to go through all of these shits with any reason as I never loved Ankita but her.  I am so stupid. For me, everything has happened.

Hi Diary,

Meet me, Ruhi Singh. A heartbroken girl. Yeah, now, I am not that same jolly Ruhi. It's someone else.

Yes u heard right- a broken girl. Fate really doesn't want me to be happy for once. Today I went to Krrish in expectation of getting love from him but I have to return with a broken heart. I lost everything. He was right. I am really mad to think that he is going to love me back. Exactly, why would he love me ? What do I have in myself ? Even my own parents also left me. What can I expect more from this world?

Today, he unknowingly hurt me when he promised that he would never hurt me. He loved someone else and that "someone" is not me. I am not that lucky to have him. Trust me, it's hurting. Yes, I can't tolerate. It seems that every parts of my body r burning in pain. I want to cry loudly but can't. My fragile heart has been broken...broken by my best friend. And I am so lonely that I have none to console me. It's it. This is my life. I should stop imagining something that's not gonna happen. And let it be. I won't write diary more as if I ever write diary again then this page will be only filled with those agonizing memories of a heartbroken teen girl who loved his best friend truly but later got rejection only...not from him,not from fate, not from the world but from herself as she is the one who has made the mistake by falling for someone who doesn't even think of her like that.

Goodbye Diary. This is the end of mine and yours journey.

5th June,2009

She had suffered unconditionally even without bothering to me. She knew that she loved me but still selflessly she had let me go for Ankita. This proves how much truly she has loved me. How can someone be this much selfless? Is she a human or an incarnation of Goddess?

I went straight to my room after coming back from office ignoring Ritika and Karan who tried to ask me the reason for my this behavior. I am sorry but I need times to collect everything. I came to know today.

RUHI

After coming back home, I directly went in the kitchen to find Karan and Ritika totally busy making out there. They were kissing so aggressively. Uff !!

I cleared my throat to gain their attention when they broke apart from each other turning towards me. Ignoring their embaressing look, I asked ,

"Where is Krrish? Has he come back ? He hasn't gone to pick up me."

"Yeah, he has come and has locked the door. I don't know what has happened with him. I guess that he is so tired. That's why I didn't try to disturb him either." Ritika replied when I nodded.

"Now continue whatever u r doing." I winked at them making Ritika blushed and Karan grinned. I left from there to our room. I went there to find the door locked. I knocked at the door.

"Krrish, Krrish, open the door. I have come back."

But he didn't open. What has happened with him ? Is everything OK?

"Krrish, r u OK? Plz open the door for my sake." I knocked again and again. After sometimes, he abruptly opened the door pulling me in the room and locked the door again. I found him gazing at me intensely with a clear hint of hurt on his face.

"Krrish r u OK ?" I asked again but he remained silent. Ignoring his strong gaze, I averted my eyes and went to grab my clothes for freshening up. But soon I was yanked away by force as I landed on Krrish's chest. He seemed furious and hurt. But why ? What did I do ?

He held me from my waist tightly as I winced in pain.

"Krrish, what r u doing ? It's paining. Leave me." But he squeezed my waist more.

"Leave." I tried to be free from his grip but he tightened his hold.

"Ahhh" I yelped when I felt my wrist aching due to his strong grip.

"What the hell r u doing, Krrish? What did I do now ? Why r u being mad at me ?" I asked but he still didn't reply. Getting no other ways, I jerked between his hold. Due to which ,we both landed on the bed, me on top of him. I instantly tried to get up but he pulled me pinning me on the bed under him. He pinned both my hands above my head and squeezed my body with him tightly. His expression is still same. Sad. Angry. He tangled our legs together pressing his body on mine.

"Krrish, what r u doing ? Leave." I again said but he put his finger on my lips.

"Shh, no more words. Why did u do it, Ruhi ?" He asked, his voice was vulnerable.

"What did I do Krrish?" I asked confusingly.

"I know everything, Ruhi." He said gritting his teeth and gestured me to look at the source where he was also watching something. I followed his gaze and it landed on my diary which was kept on the dressing table. A gasp left from my mouth when realization hit me. He knows about my crush on him.

"Why did u do it ,Ruhi? Why didn't u tell me that u loved me ? Why did u hide your feelings and let me go for Ankita while u loved me senseless? Am I that cruel that u couldn't even share your freaking secret with me ? Was I not your best friend then ? It's all my fault. I chose the wrong person then. But when I realized the truth, it's too late." He said, his voice was broken as I sensed him blaming himself for all these. I soon cupped his cheeks making him to look at me.

"That was past Krrish. We r in present. It doesn't matter what we had done in past. It matters what we r doing in present and how we r going to make the future better. Let's forget it. Just think that it was bound to happen and it happened. Don't blame yourself for this." I said sincerely feeling each and every words from my heart. It really doesn't bother me since at the end I am with the one whom I have always loved forever.

"No Ruhi, it's always me who hurts u. Sometimes I think what I have done to deserve u. U r too precious. I don't deserve u. U r too good for me." He whispered and started getting off me. I soon held his hand and pulled him upon me.

"No ,u r not. U r the best infact. U make mistakes, u regret and u pay for it. U r not perfect. Infact none is perfect. U r also a human-being. So it doesn't matter if u r not good enough for me. U r bad or good. I don't care. I care that u love me and it's all I have wanted. Don't think low of yourself. U r just the best version of yourself and that's why u fail and grow at the same time. And I love this man only." I said and caressed his cheek. He closed his eyes and then stared at me.

"R u sure ?" He asked softly not trusting my words.

"I am sure. I love u." I said and pulled him for a tight hug.

"I love u too." He said against my ear pressing a kiss on my earlobe. He kept his head on my nape for a few more minutes tightly holding me like his life depended on it where I let him to be close with me in the way he wanted.

"Ahhhh" I moaned loudly when he suddenly bite the sweet spot of my neck. He then looked at me with an innocent face and attacked my neck with his kisses. Next thing which I knew that this  leaded something more and more in which he claimed me as his signifying his physical attraction and love towards me.

******
Krrish collapsed on top of me panting heavily when my eyes were filled with tears - tears of acceptance, pain, pleasure and joy.

Our naked bodies tangling with each other under the white sheet which were covering both of us till our chest.

He pressed a kiss on my forehead and said "YOU R MINE"

"I AM YOURS." I nodded and he claimed my lips.

And here he means it. I am his from both physically and mentally. I have surrendered myself to this man - my love, my dreams, my life, my dignity and my care. Each and every part of my body belongs to him only. He has all rights to savour me whenever he wants. He has all rights to claim me as his as all of me belongs to him only. My heart beats for him and he is like oxygen in my life. He is everything I need to complete my life and myslef. I love him.

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Words: 3300+

I hope that u have liked this chapter. I haven't written the whole diary as it's impossible. Just added the ones which r needed. I hope that u r OK with it.

A new year special chapter.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 💚 to all of u. Stay positive and keep smiling. God bless u. Lots of loves from me.

A tough question:

For whom will u go for ? - KRRISH OR RUHI 😏

Do vote and comment.

I will post one more bonus part of this story and there it will be finished.