Izuku was somewhat exited for the training today.  He wanted everything to feel normal, he didn't like the way things were right now.

He felt... sad.  Incredibly sad.  He didn't know how to explain it, he didn't think he ever would be able too.

Whenever he thought about Uraraka, his heart twisted, and all he felt was pain and guilt.  He didn't know why.

Whenever he looked at Bakugo, all he felt was fear.  He was... so angry with himself.  He'd thought that he was over this, over this fear that held him captive from his childhood bully.

So, a training exercise in class made him happy.  It showed him how far he'd come from that kid in middle school.

But something was off.

Everything he did just felt wrong. Even now, when Aizawa announced that he would be on a team with Iida, Todoroki, and Kirishima for training, he just couldn't help but feel like it was wrong.

His brain hurt. Fighting would help him relax.

"Okay guys, I've thought of a plan-" Izuku started.

"I've got one too." Todoroki interrupted.

"O-Ok-"

"Midoriya you can stay here, don't engage."

Izuku looked at him blankly before his face twisted in fury, "I'll do it all myself!" He lashed at them before jumping away.

"Midoriya!" They all called in unison, trying to chase him.

"All of you, just stay away from me!" He screamed as he ran faster.

Midnight came into view and Izuku charged her. She saw him and flinched for a second, before turning off her quirk.

Izuku halted in front of her, why isn't she using her quirk?

Did someone... tell her not to use it on me?

Izuku powered up his fist and he charged again, tears fell from his eyes, "Why?!"

Midnight jumped away with a worried look on her face, she spotted his other teammates and called for them.

"Use your quirk on me!" Izuku hissed.

Midnight used her whip to grab Izuku's arm, and she stayed silent.

"Use it!" He cried, wrenching his arm free and rearing his fist back, charging her.

He hit her square in the jaw and she feel to the ground, she looked dazed from the hit.

He reared his other fist back and hit her again, "Why won't you?!"

She tried to throw him off but he hit her again. He raised his fist for another and screamed, "What is wrong with you people!?"

Before he could hit her, he was tackled off by someone else.

"Calm down, Man!" Kirishima yelled as he pinned Izuku to the ground.

"What is wrong with all of you!?" He cried.

Iida bent down to check on Midnight, she looked alright, her face was just getting swollen.

Izuku kept crying and screaming.

"What are you keeping from me!?"

"Why are you doing this to me!?"

"I-I don't... understand..." his voice started to falter.

"help me." He started sobbing.

~

Izuku stayed isolated in his room.

Aizawa decided Izuku needed space for a little. Not for long, maybe a few hours before he would intervene.

"You can't leave Midoriya alone, Mr. Aizawa!" Todoroki hissed.

"He needs space."

"No, he can't handle it!" Kirishima cried.

"I think you severely underestimate your classmate." Aizawa said seriously.

And maybe, Aizawa would have been right. 

~

Izuku stared blankly at the walls, at the posters of All Might.

All Might...

Izuku felt like he was failing him.  An utter let down.  One For All should have gone to someone else, someone with potential.  Not some useless, worthless, waste of space.

Waste of life.

He wished he had his notebook, so he could look at his thoughts on paper.  He had to settle for something else, so he scrambled off the bed and grabbed a few pieces of loose paper.

His eye caught some photographs he had put up.  The pictures of him being happy, being with his friends.  His hand slowly reached out and grabbed a class photo.  They all looked so happy. 

Izuku set it down lightly.  He reached for a different picture.  It was just a picture of him.  He chuckled softly as he remembered how he'd gotten it.

It was a picture of him in his hero costume.  He'd been wearing it during training, when Ashido ran over and snapped a picture before he could say anything.  She had made it her personal mission to take a photograph of every student in their class and print it out for them.

He set the papers he held in his hand down, and held the photograph in both hands.  He positioned his fingers at the top, and slowly pulled the photo apart.

He ripped it straight in half as his tears stained it.

He went to rip it again, but hesitated, he spoke softly to himself, "Happy thoughts."

He set the photo down and returned to his bed with the paper and a pencil.

He wanted to write down what he knew, and what made sense.  But none of it made sense.

He wrote on the paper in messy handwriting, "it doesn't make sense."

He spoke out loud, "It doesn't make sense."

He wrote it again.  It doesn't make sense.

Again.  It doesn't make sense.

He kept writing it, over and over, hoping that if he just kept repeating it, it would magically make sense to him.

He stopped writing and looked forward.  He reached his hand out and grabbed on to the single flicker of determination he had left.  He stared at the All Might poster and he tried to mirror the smile, he couldn't give up yet.

He froze as he heard a knock at the door.

Aizawa said I could be alone... so why?

He got up slowly and hovered by the door, "Who's-s there?"

The other person didn't respond so Izuku spoke again, "H-Hello?"

He jumped as he heard his phone ding.  He reached into his pocket and looked at the message.

Please let me in.  -Uraraka

Izuku immediately unlocked the door and swung it open.  He hadn't seen her all day, and he was worried.

Worrying about someone else and pushing aside his own issues, classic Izuku.

She wouldn't meet his eyes, only staring at her feet.

"Uraraka?" He said softly, "Is everything okay?"

She shook her head no and steeped into his room.

"W-What's wrong?"  He moved to put his hand on her back but she flinched and he halted.

He retreated his hand and looked at her worriedly, "Uraraka?"

He heard her take a deep breath.

He... deserves...

"Deku," her voice was surprisingly calm and control.

"Yes, yes what is it!" He asked hopefully, she was finally talking!

"You killed me, and yourself in another timeline."

The truth.