Warning : This chapter is lazily written ;) It might be because we have one more chapter left.

CHAPTER 9

"Ichinose-san, are you sure about your decision?"

For the last time...

Yes, he was going to say it so that anyone who made him repeat himself would stay out of his way but...

Whenever he turned to see Haruka's round eyes which cast concern and could swallow him inside, he could not.

He was no longer the Ichinose Tokiya who would glare at anyone who got on his nerves. He was no longer the Ichinose-san who got easily annoyed at Haruka's tendency to poke her nose into his business.

He was the Ichinose-san who did not want to hurt her feelings anymore and wanted her to stay by his side. Yet, at the same time, he did not want to be that selfish. She deserved to choose the best path for her life.

Which was with STARISH.

STARISH without Tokiya.

"I think so," he said nonchalantly as he flipped the script in his hand. This was no good. He had a drama shooting tomorrow but he could not focus. All the dialogue was already in his head but he could not immerse into his character at all.

"How about your career after this? How about STARISH? You have managed to escape from being HAYATO..."

"You can see what I am doing right now, right, Nanami-san?" He said as he lifted the script to match her eye level. His lips spread a small smile that no one knew how exhausting for him to curve in. "Excluding STARISH activities, I am fully booked until next year. I have the whole year to work hard and prove everyone that I still can be a solo artist. At that time, STARISH will be well-know and I will be cheering them on..."

"But you shine the most when you're with them. Please don't lie to me, Ichinose-san!"

As much as he found that her voice was cute even she was shrieking like a bird, this was not the time for that. From how Haruka was frowning while both her hands were balled into fists, Tokiya was convinced that she would punch him if she could.

"You look the happiest when you sing with them. I know I haven't known you too long but from the way your songs didn't have a heart before, it might be caused by your hardship in the past. To be honest, you look so much better when you smile like there is no tomorrow. It makes me happy and to see you happy is..."

At this moment, she went too personal and she knew that she talked too much. The guts which she had garnered in order to convince Tokiya instantly faded into the thin air. All she could do instead of running away out of embarrassment was looking at the grass while screaming in her mind.

Why does it matter for him to know what makes me happy? Stupid Haruka!

There was no response from Tokiya. Seconds passed and Haruka almost believed that Tokiya thought she was being ridiculous when suddenly...

"Ichinose!"

"Tokiya!"

"Tokiya-kun!"

Continuously of loud voices disrupted the awkward vibes between them. She turned, eyes sized up to see the rest of STARISH members gasped for air. They ran so fast as if they just knew that Tokiya would leave the Master Course in a slow motion with a hope that they would stop and apologize to him.

"Guys..." she exclaimed.

"Damn... are you here for the whole day with Nanami!? I thought that the earth just swallowed you for good," Syo exclaimed, hands clasping his knees as his body still defeated his exhaustion.

"What?" Tokiya frowned which made everyone flinch including Otoya (surprisingly). Their responses were hilarious but Tokiya immediately made his face muscle relax.

He did not want to be that kind of friend who made his own friends discomforted. He wanted to be better.

"No, not the whole day," Haruka who was panicky about the fact that she just went too personal about her feelings just now ended up stuttering which added up the confusion for the circle of friends. "I just happened to find him here. I had looked for him like all of you for the whole day too."

"I find here to be cosier and easier for me to focus on my script," Tokiya said flatly.

"I see. That's why I couldn't find you even we share the same mind," HAYATO remarked. "You might feel so lost because you aren't in peace nowadays."

"What are you talking about? Speak in a language that I can understand."

"We know you're upset with what we have done to you, Ichinose," Masato said which was immediately denied by Tokiya who waved his hand at the scion's direction.

"I am good with you, Hijirikawa-san. You scolded me for being mean but at the same time, you treated me fair enough so yeah, I have no issues with you."

"What about the rest of us? Are you still angry with what happened lately?" Otoya suddenly exclaimed which sounded like a child who demanded his mother to be fair to all his siblings.

Tokiya swore, even he had not looked at them most of the time, the warm feeling that Otoya always emitted had returned to him again. Otoya was no longer cold with him.

"I thought you're the one who's angry with me."

"It's all an act!" Otoya shrieked which proved his roommate more that he was no longer the Otoya who had been upset about Tokiya insulting him and HAYATO.

"I was the one who convinced him to be my accomplice. It's a prank," HAYATO said.

"A prank?" Tokiya glared which scared most of them. "Do you think this is funny?"

"Yes, it's," when everyone thought HAYATO was way too blunt which was enough from the way Tokiya's blue eyes sized up in exasperation, HAYATO added, "but it doesn't mean I wanted to be cruel in the first place. I just wanted you to realize how precious they are for you. You just don't see it yet and who else will make you realize it other than me?"

"What are you..."

"In case you don't know yet..." HAYATO took out Tokiya's smart phone from his pocket which the guy conveniently had left in his room for some reason. "I believe you your current goal is Utapri award and guess what? You're not the only one with that goal and your rival just happened to be from Raging Entertainment. Does that ring a bell?"

Raging Entertainment...

HAYATO pressed 'play' for a video which went viral nowadays. Silence passed before a loud cheer from the video caught them off guard.

"We're here, angels!"

"How are you doing, angels!? If you don't feel good, the cute Nagi is right here for your service!"

"HEAVENS," they all could not help but exclaim the band name even they did not want to feel intimidated by the band.

The band which had been sought-after, popular and powerful.

HEAVENS's rise was like an apocalypse; that was what they all had concluded. They did realize that their reactions and overall fuss were too dramatic but they could not help it. HEAVENS was founded by Raging Otori who everyone also knew as the only rival of the great Shining Saotome. Whenever they shared the same stories in various media, fans here and there would anticipate the outcome.

So, thanks to the adrenaline rush, Tokiya knew he should knock some sense in his head. With STARISH being in the same spotlight with HEAVENS, his left the band would cause more unnecessary bad news and they might lose the trust and their fans. At least, he should spend his blood, sweat and tears for the award.

He did not know where to start and it was HAYATO's job to make him see the path.

"I am sorry," to expect that Tokiya would ask him to talk just two of them by the lake was not much of a surprise but to expect him to apologize was...

"Huh? For what?" HAYATO asked as he looked at Tokiya who was staring at the lake.

"For not understanding you and getting rid of you from my life easily," he said, eyes sometime looking at the not interesting grass. "When in fact, it's you who has been working hard all this time and made me who I am."

"Nah, please... enough with the flashback," HAYATO said, scratching his head awkwardly. "Do you know it's very troublesome to be created as bubbly guy with a troubled head at the same time? I know why you don't trust people easily but why bother comparing those jerks who ruined your trainee days with your teammates when they are different people?"

That question randomly stroke a question in Tokiya's mind.

"Seriously, what did you tell them that made them suddenly apologize..."

"Everything."

"Everything?"

"Everything but not in details," HAYATO said. He smiled as he could see the sign of relief from Tokiya. "It's true that they're your teammates; the big part of your new life but I don't think they need to know how bad those people treated you before. I bet you won't want them to look at you like you're pathetic, right? They will pity you more if they know, you even used to be poisoned by those people who were jealous of your voice."

Tokiya had nothing to say because HAYATO was so right.

He's so compassionate but why couldn't I see it before? I was too blind.

"You can stay here longer if you want," he said, in attempt to sound nonchalant but sincere.

"You're welcome but no," HAYATO said, smelling the indirect 'thank you' from othe other guy. "I am solely here to see you happy. It's not only because I am a dull comedian..."

"HAYATO..."

"But it's because of you. You and I are the same person. Whatever hurts you, it will hurt me deeply too. If you're not happy, how I am supposed to feel happy and decide that it's the time for me to leave you forever? You left HAYATO world because you wanted to be happy, right? I need to see you happy first."

Something thumped Tokiya's chest but surprisingly, the tight knot which always restrained him from making his way to the future was loosened as he knew that he was supported by himself.

Damn, he never thought that he himself had the ability to move people's heart.

But, he never realized it. Just like what Saotome had said, he only complained and demanded that the world would revolve around him.

"What will make you happy then, HAYATO? Let's be considerate to each other."

"Woah, really? To hear that you suggest for us to be considerate to each other is an ultra happiness for me haha. It's because you know, you're a selfish jerk so..."

"What else?" As Tokiya literally shot a purple laser from his eyes, it sent the other lad flinch.

Silence passed the lake before HAYATO said with a smile, "Stay with STARISH and... comfort Haruka-chan. You're the only one who can do it."

"What?"

"Come on. It's impossible for you not to realize how she has changed so much lately. I think the burden of having to write the best song for STARISH has made her stressed out. Why don't you do something about it?"

HAYATO was smiling cheekily and Tokiya felt scared.

"Do what?"

If Tomochika was here, she would nag or push Haruka's head for letting stress taking over her senses. If Tomochika was still her roommate, the vivacious girl would pull her from her table and drag her way to the cafetaria just to ensure that she would not die from starvation.

But now, not only the girl was not her roommate anymore, Haruka always refused the girl's rare invitation to hang out together.

How could she when she had STARISH's future career in her hand? How could she when STARISH depended on her song to defeat HEAVENS? Thanks to Saotome and Raging Otori's deal that whoever lost the competition would be disbanded, now she could not meet STARISH without the image of their disbandment in her mind.

Haruka might not be sociable and enjoyed gossiping but she did follow the current issues in showbiz. She knew how strong HEAVENS was. Each of the members was very talented which cost more time and sweat for STARISH not to waste.

She wanted them to stay together and she wanted to continue writing songs for them.

So, she used most of her time to construct, draft, press her piano keys and many more to produce the best song for STARISH. More crumpled papers on the floor could be put aside. She could clean her room later.

Later when STARISH's future was sealed by their victory.

Her focus on the blank sheet shattered as the sound of firm knocks on the door exchoed throughout her room. She sighed. Every fibre of her was tired but she knew she had to at least fix her hair and smile since she did not want to cause concern for others.

She had to deal with this problem alone because it was solely hers.

After combing her messy hair, she glanced at her image in the mirror. Her complexion did not look great at all but...

She could pretend that she just woke up and have a good evening sleep.

She made her way towards the door, did not care who she was going to expect.

Which could be a big mistake for her because as soon as she opened the door and saw the stoic Tokiya, her worried head became light.

It was light with embarrassment. She literally had done something more than just a friend when she almost confessed her deep feelings to him and now, she was not ready to face the man.

"Ichinose-san... what..."

"Have you eaten anything... today?"

"I..."

"Here," without waiting for her full answer, Tokiya held out a light blue tiffin carrier. "Given you have worked so much lately, I bet you don't have time to grab anything today."

She took the food as confusion was all written over her tired face.

"What's this..."

"Hijirikawa-san and Ren packed them together. Everyone is worried about you."

"I see. Thank you so much, Ichinose-san."

Silence passed and when the awkwardness appeared again, Haruka could not help but stare at the foor thoughtlessly. Just with Tokiya standing close to her could cause her heart to beat too fast.

But, it did not hurt. Rather, it was pleasant, warm...

"Nanami-san..."

Yes, his voice too...

"If you have time to spare, can you go this place tomorrow?" He held out a small white paper which she took it hesitantly.

Surprisingly, for someone who easily got lost, she managed to find the place that Tokiya asked her to go.

But, it was a lot more surprising that the reason why she was here, in the midst of the crowd because Tokiya was going to sing his new song, Crystal Time through the city big screen.

Unlike HAYATO's version, his was much more amazing, sweet and...

She did not know if there was any existed word in the world that could describe what she felt right now. Leaving stunned on her spot, the busy crowd had caused her to stumble and fall. It did not take long for her to grimace in pain before...

"Are you okay?" Before the soft voice which just swooned everyone's heart with his new song greeted her. Hi long fingers were held out like a prince, only for his princess.

Haruka looked up. The familiar blue eyes and spiky navy blue hair came into her views and without delay, her heart beat fast again.

Oh, my... what's wrong with my heart lately? Do I suffer from anxiety attack because of Utapri award or...

"Good evening," as the man kneeled down to match her eye level, she almost wanted to scream.

Out of nervousness or happiness, she did not know. There were too many things that clouded her head so she could not think straight anymore.

"Ichi..." she quickly shut her mouth. There was no way Tokiya would want all attention to himself. Not when he just broadcast his new song and people still squealed around them.

"Let's go to the spot where is less populated, shall we?"

Which brought them to pass all small stores in conjunction with the festival before they sat together on a bench. A few couples happened to be around them, laughed together, be affectionate to each other...

Which definitely set the mood if they were really a couple but...

They were not. They were not and Haruka was not fine with the fact. Why would Tokiya waste his time just to make sure that she ate all takoyaki when she could grab something on her own whenever she felt hungry in her room? She should try to write more songs for STARISH, not making Tokiya felt burdened like this.

"You look pale, Nanami-san. Do you eat anything today?"

She was supposed to answer the question normally. As normal as their friendship had always been but...

"N...no. I am..."

"If that's so, here," Tokiya fed her one more takoyaki. Despite her inner protest and dangerously thumping heart, she chewed right away, oblivious of the secretive stares from the deep blue iris.

"That makes me really relieved, Nanami-san."

"Huh?"

"The fact that you eat deliciously, it's a nice sight to see."

Wh... what?

Her face felt hot. She knew she was blushing madly but she could not help it. It was not like this was the first time a man exclaimed something about her small actions made them happy or relieved. Ren did say that she looked the most beautiful when she held a bouquet of roses that he gave to her. Masato shyly said that she looked the most amazing when she played piano but...

With Tokiya, it was different.

"Now that you ate all of it, I was wondering if I can accompany you for the rest of the night. You know, just play games, shopping something..."

This time, when he held out his hand, Haruka did not hesitate to receive it whole-heartedly.

Her heart even whispered cheesily that she would go anywhere he would bring her.

She felt safe with him.

Haruka only knew Tokiya as someone with a lot of responsibilities on his head. He was the most workaholic out of them and most of the time, he did not tolerate nonsenses.

But tonight, she learned the different side of him which was gentler and cuter.

He was gentler when he helped her with the shooting game. Thanks to him, they won STARISH debut CD and he gladly said, "you can take it."

He was cuter because after being cool with his shooting skills, he could not conceal his frustration after losing the goldfish scooping five times straight. He glared at the small and torn scooper so deep that it might be burnt by the laser of his eyes in any second.

He was angry and frustrated but Haruka could not help but laugh. It was a universal fact that the game was made into a game because it was almost impossible to catch the fast goldfish using the ultra thin paper scooper. Even the children next to them reacted to their loss way cooler than Tokiya but for the idol who loved perfection...

He was indeed frustrated which was so naïve and cute of him.

But what made her fluster afterward as soon as he saw her laugh was he smiled at her reaction.

Why would he smile? Wasn't he supposed to be more frustrated because I laughed at his loss?

They continued to walk and have fun until they ended up farther from other people. It was a wide grass area with a nice night view. Stars emitted the beautiful light and they could even see the fireworks from where they stood.

She felt light at last. Her head felt fresh and she wondered if more ideas would strike as soon as she returned home, grabbed her music sheets and pressed the piano keys randomly.

But, before that...

"Ichinose-san..." she called which made Tokiya who walked a bit faster than her stopped. He turned, meeting her eyes.

"Thank you... for today. I enjoyed it."

He smiled before fully turning to face her.

"You're welcome. That's really nice to hear you enjoyed yourself. After all, I have something to talk to you."

"Huh?"

"Nanami-san..." he slightly bowed before continuing, "The truth is... I would like to thank you so much for being the reason why I am here, why I am living this life while I don't deserve it."

"What... what do you mean, Ichinose-san?"

"You give me a hope, a reason not to give up on my dreams and to understand HAYATO when I failed to do so. You're always there when I thought I was being outcasted so thank you so much, Nanami-san."

"No, I don't think I do anything to deserve your thank you, Ichinose-san. I just care about you..."

"You care about me?"

Oh, no...

"Ah, I mean... I mean, well, you see..."

A smile formed before he continued, "Indeed, you deserve that, Nanami-san. It really sounds like you to not want all the credits for your hardwork. You think you don't deserve compliments when the rest of us feel thankful for you to introduce us to each other but..." his handsome face turned serious as he added, "I want you to know that if something hurts or troubles you, you don't deserve to feel them alone."

This time, the unsettled feeling that she believed was an anxiety attack thumped fast on her heart and chest. She froze on her spot as his soft voice which delivered his sincerity registered in her head.

"We want you to rely on us. You have us. You have me," he said. Tokiya might want to make this situation as not awkward or cool as possible but there Haruka was, standing with a blank face but...

Teary eyes. Up until recently, she has lost in her deepest hole of low self-esteem. She felt she did not deserve to be a STARISH composer. She thought if they lost and got disbanded, it was her who would shoulder the guilt for the rest of her life.

"In this life, everyone will lose their sight sometimes. Is that what you told me before, Nanami-san?"

"Losing sight," she knew she looked so pathetic when tears quickly streamed down her face. The senses finally hit head, scolding her for being too obsessed with writing a remarkable song when it was not the right way for her.

She originally wanted to write music that made people happy and not an unbeatable song.

Idiot Haruka. Now you cried like a child and do you think Ichinose-san will be happy to see you like this? You can't call yourself a pro if this is just the beginning and you easily and already lost your sight, you know.

She was too embarrassed and almost ran away before a pair of welcoming arms enveloped her tiny frame into a wam hug. Her tears made Tokiya's yukata wet but that only made his hug around her frame tightened.

She knew they should not be in this kind of situation. Tokiya was an idol and strictly forbidden to be caught in scandal or gossips.

"Ichinose-san, we shouldn't..."

"Like I said, Nanami-san..." he emphasized, his voice was close to her ears. "Don't try to shoulder everything alone. I know what are you feeling. I have been there. I have lost and I thought that I would meet the end of my career. If you are in pain, so am I. You have me to tell everything."

Despite what her head said that she should not be found like this with the idol, she followed what her heart said instantly.

"Thank you so much, Ichinose-san. I really appreciate it."

The pace around them was slow and it felt there were only two of them in this world. It felt like they only had each other to rely on and to spend their life with.

But, all the serene moment was shattered the moment other STARISH members arrived which also included HAYATO and Cecil.

It was chaotic afterward and it was all started with a simple question from her.

"Everyone, where did you come from?"

"Well, we already planned from the start that we'll watch the fireworks together with you here," Syo said and that was when they all started to connect the dots.

"And Ichinose happened to offer himself to bring you here," Masato supplied.

"He's late, right?" As Ren pointed out the obvious, Haruka swore that she could see Tokiya blush.

His blush grew darker as other guys started to interrogate him like a team of cops who just found a kidnapper for a long-searched victim.

"What's happening here, Tokiya-kun? Why are you late?" Natsuki asked.

"I refuse to answer that," it looked like his usually smart brain could not come up with a better excuse than the most suspicious answer in the world.

"Hm? Ichinose?" Even with how intimidating Masato's deep voice echoed, it did not manage to open the vocalist's mouth until...

Ren decided to possess a power of teleporting before hugging Tokiya's shoulder with a smirk.

"Icchi... don't tell me that you got a step ahead with Lady."

"What? I didn't do anything!"

As if! The usually calm and collected Tokiya was stuttering. He blushed and his voice was not relaxed at all. It was obvious to everyone to the point of the naïve Otoya also could sense it.

"Eh, Tokiya!?"

"Just spill it out, Ichinose," one by one, they formed an angry circle around the nervous blue head.

"I repeat, I refuse to answer!" even when HAYATO and Ren already held both his sides using their strongest energy, Tokiya never failed to be stubborn.

"Tokiyaaa, spill it out!"

And they only stopped when the colorful fireworks reached the sky or else, Tokiya might be the deadmeat and could never see the day of Utapri Award.

In the midst of their amazement, HAYATO secretly hugged Tokiya's shoulder before whispering, "you're so classically romantic, Tokiya."

"Huh?"

"Do you forget already? I saw what you have done with Haruka-chan in my head."

That made him blush furiously.

How could he forget that?

"What's with the 'you have me' thingy? Did you officially say that from now on, you belong to her? That's cheesy, Tokiya!" 

"Shut up!"