"All I know is that I carried you for nine months. I fed you, I clothed you, I paid for your college education. Friending me on Facebook seems like a small thing to ask in return." Jodi Picoult, Sing You Home

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Chapter Nineteen

Olivia immediately felt like a frightened little girl when her mother entered the den. She had not seen her mother in four years, and yet nothing had changed. Every insecurity, every faux pas she was suddenly so aware of. The hurt of knowing she would never have the love and approval of her mother was suddenly so prominent in her heart, as it had been the day she had been rejected at fifteen.

Ruth was as beautiful and as regal as ever. She was dressed immaculately, as a Countess should, in the finest travelling clothes money could buy. Her red hair was still perfect in colour, and her ivory skin did not betray her age. Her eyes, though, were filled with ire and judgement, and they were settled on her nineteen year old daughter.

"Away with you," Ruth said dismissively to the butler, Stoughton, who had obviously been trying to keep their guest to a drawing room so he could warn the family.

Bernard, whose chair was not facing the door, was still unaware that his eldest daughter had joined them. He was still happily inspecting the pipe he had received from Colin.

Lorna immediately put a comforting arm around Olivia but it did little to steady her nerves. Ruth noticed the action and looked upon them disapprovingly.

"Happy Christmas, sister," Lorna greeted tensely.

Ruth ignored her younger sister's well-wish. "I thought you might have returned here for Christmas and I was right." She immediately entered the room properly so that she was standing beside her father's chair, standing directly opposite Olivia and Lorna.

Now that Ruth was standing beside him, Bernard noticed her presence. He appeared quite shocked, and stared up at his eldest child. Ruth did not acknowledge him, just as she ignored Lorna.

"Wasn't it enough that your father and I had to explain to our friends that our daughter was off getting herself arrested instead of behaving like the proper lady she was brought up to be? Wasn't it enough that you were humiliating us in front of our friends? No? You felt it necessary to humiliate us in front of the entire country!" Ruth shouted furiously.

Olivia recoiled just as far back as the sofa would allow. It had been four years since her mother had last berated her and it felt just as terribly now as it did then.

Ruth took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I could have found you a suitable husband, someone with a position and respect. But no, marriage is too traditional for the likes of radical Olivia Pendleton. She feels it is more appropriate to be a politician's whore than a gentleman's wife!" Ruth sucked in an icy breath. "Tell me why, Olivia. Why do you hate me so? I raised you exactly the same way that Lady Gregson raised her daughter, who I was told at tea the other day is with child! Married to a Captain in the Navy and expecting! I all but had to show Lady Gregson the front page of the newspaper to tell her what my daughter was up to." Ruth clenched her fists and shook her head, her eyes narrowing on Olivia. "And with a Kensington of all people."

Olivia closed her eyes for a moment as her mother took a breath from her lecture. This was not the first time it was assumed that she was Kit's whore and not his advisor. What a nasty mistake it was to make, and it hurt even more coming from her mother. Her mother's words felt like bullets, insult after insult, bullet after bullet, hitting her right in the chest.

Olivia thought back to the dinner she had Kit had attended at the Hadley's. The same assumption had been made but the gentlemen at the table and Kit had defended her.

"I would wager you would not find fifty minds in the House of Commons who are as bright or enlightened as she is."

No matter her struggle with jealously, she was at Kit's side for a reason.

"Now Ruth –" Lorna began in Olivia's defence but Olivia interrupted her.

Olivia rose up from the settee and faced her mother. "I am Kit's political advisor, Mama," she said firmly. "I care not for what those newspapers have to say about me, but my role is clear. I am bright. I am enlightened. Kit chooses to take my advice because, as he says, you would not find fifty minds in the House of Commons who are as clever as me. That is something to be proud of, I think." Olivia puffed out her chest a little. It was something to be proud of.

Ruth continued to stare at her.

"I do not hate you, Mama. If only you knew how that were true. I am just different from you. I have ambitions and dreams that go beyond being married to a bloody naval captain!"

"Language!" spat Ruth. She turned her attention to Lorna. "This is your fault. You coddle her. Just like you were coddled."

Lorna gasped. "I do not coddle her!" she retorted, standing up from the settee. "I have very little influence over Olivia, I think. But at least I am here to try to influence her."

"Of course you are. Precious Lorna," Ruth mocked. "You wouldn't know discipline if it slapped you in the face. That is why I am the witch and you are the beloved aunt."

"Mama!" cried Olivia. "Do not be angry with Aunt Lorna when it is me you came to see."

"Quiet, Olivia," snapped Ruth.

"Do you have something to say to me, sister?" Lorna asked expectantly, clearly becoming angry and upset at Ruth's accusations.

Ruth smiled almost wickedly. "Oh, I have many things I would like to say to you, sister. To him, too," she said, nodding down towards her father. Bernard had returned to inspecting his pipe, taking no notice of the conflict.

"Then please, pray tell!" Lorna said exasperatedly.

"Perfect, precious Lorna can do no wrong."

"What are you talking about?" Lorna demanded to know.

"Didn't you ever question why Father doted on you so, and couldn't care a wit about me? But I am sure you mail his many letters to me, don't you? I am sure you were the one who sent off his Christmas gift for John and I, weren't you?"

Lorna was silent.

"No, I didn't think so," Ruth said condescendingly.

"He doesn't talk about you," replied Lorna quietly. "We don't talk about you. I don't know why."

"You never thought to question it? Or were to you too busy enjoying being the favourite child?"

"There is no need to be nasty, Ruth!" exclaimed Lorna. "That is why Papa doesn't include you. You are nasty! I am sure Olivia, and Papa, would welcome you with open arms if only you would be a little nicer!"

Olivia knew this conversation was not going to end well. Ruth was baiting her sister and Lorna was taking it. Ruth was not in the mood for reconciliation. She was here to fight.

"Come with me, Mama," Olivia announced as she marched over from the settee and took her mother's hand. Olivia dragged Ruth from the den and into the hallway, leading her down the corridor towards her own bedroom. Ruth followed her.

Once inside her bedroom, Olivia's released her mother's hand and closed the door.

Ruth was still so angry. "My father," she fumed, pointing in the direction of the den, "hated my mother. When she died I think he was glad. He was happy working, entertaining, letting nannies raise me instead of him. I wasn't always this bitter, Olivia, I hope you realise that," she snapped. "He told me once I reminded him of my mother. I understood exactly what he meant. You can imagine my ire when he married their mother and doted upon Colin and Lorna. Especially his precious angel, Lorna."

"I understand, Mama," Olivia replied softly. She had heard the story in bits and pieces over the years. Ruth hardly mentioned her family, but when she did it was with bitterness and envy.

They both sat down on Olivia's bed and faced each other. Olivia could see the hurt in her mother's eyes and it frightened her more than anything. She was so used to seeing her mother angry. She was not prepared for pain.

"I swore that when I became a mother I would never make my child feel as I did when I was a girl. I was going to raise her, to be there for her like my father should have been there for me. Nannies were not going to take my role. I made sure you have the best of everything. I ensured you had beautiful clothes, beautiful possessions. You had fine tutors. You learned languages and dancing and music. But nothing I did was right. You fought me at every turn. You hated me when all I ever did was try to give you the life I didn't have. You punished me, Olivia. You continue to punish me."

Olivia could feel the weight of the betrayal her mother felt sitting directly on her shoulders. She understood why her mother felt that way, but she had never known her mother cared so much about her. She had never felt that from Ruth, ever.

"Do you still care about me, Mama?" Olivia asked. She could not fathom the fear she felt behind this question. How could she handle another rejection?

Ruth softened a fraction. "I am your mother," she replied. "I am cursed to fret about you for the rest of my days."

Olivia could have beamed. She knew that was her mother's icy way of saying that she loved her. "I love you, Mama. I never meant to punish you. I never thought about how my actions would affect you or hurt you. I am simply doing what I feel is right. I am being a champion for those who have no-one. I have a clever head on my shoulders. You did not raise a fool."

"You were always too smart for your own good," Ruth said stiffly.

Olivia knew that her mother would never approve of her behaviour unless it involved vows and a church. But she hoped that they now understood each other in a way they had never been able to before.

"You really ought to get married," her mother continued. "Preferably to someone who could shut you up once in a while."

"I could never be married to someone who would want to quieten me," declared Olivia.

"I thought as much," murmured Ruth. "What am I going to tell your father then? He reads the newspaper and he is just as concerned about your reputation as I am."

"Tell him there is to be an election on the tenth of January, and his daughter is the advisor to a future MP," Olivia said proudly. "It is the truth, no matter what the newspapers decide to write."

Ruth shook her head. "She couldn't just be a debutante," she muttered under her breath.

And that was about as much acceptance as Olivia knew she was going to get from Ruth. Olivia smiled at her mother. Ruth rolled her eyes.

There was to be an election on the tenth of January, and Olivia knew of one other family who needed to know about it.

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Hope you enjoyed!! 

Gilmore Girls update: tonight I said "Only 16 more episodes until Lorelai and Luke get together!" and my mum goes, "Oh COME ON!" hahahahaha I've never seen her so obsessed. Then my brother comes home from futsal and he's like, "One Tree Hill, I understand. The first episode is basketball, bam, you have a plot, but what the hell is this show about?" and my mum vehemently defends Gilmore Girls and I've never been so proud. 

Speaking of One Tree Hill - WHO ELSE WAS TROLLED THINKING THERE WAS A REUNION HAPPENING BUT IT'S JUST SOME DUMB LIFETIME MOVIE I MEAN I'LL PROBABLY STILL WATCH IT BECAUSE ONE TREE HILL IS LIFE BUT COME ON I WAS WANTING A #NALEY AND #LEYTON REUNION GUYS!!! 

That's now two movies I'm looking forward to this Christmas - that and the sequel to A Christmas Prince which is just about my favourite terrible movie ever. 

Okay better get some sleep. It's formal (prom) season Down Under which means I'm doing makeup. Gotta be able to hold my hand steady while applying a wing on someone else which is scary. 

Vote and comment!! 

Ps. Three uploads in a week? Omg.