The music blares like a foghorn in the cramped space, filled with sweaty bodies and intoxicated partygoers. Legs and arms flash bare in the neon lights, either flailing wildly to the music or wrapped around the curves of another human being.

Tamsin pulls you to the bar, her pink hair pulled into a tight braid down the open back of her dress. You're wearing a similar style of dress, knee height in length with spaghetti straps. Only yours has a belt around the waist, and it's slightly less revealing.

"Two vodkas and coke!" Tamsin yells over the music, ordering drinks for the two of you. She turns to you with a grin. "Isn't this place awesome?!"

"Yeah! I've been in here nearly five minutes, and nobody's tried to grope me yet!"

She laughs and slaps your shoulder, "Oh shut up!"

The drinks come and you both take huge gulps. Finding a stool each, you seat yourselves at the bar and start trying to pick out the most absurd people in the pulsating crowd.

"What about afro girl doing the electric slide?" You point out, picking out the bright blue afro of a young woman on the dance floor.

Tamsin giggles and directs your attention to another part of the throng. "Check out mullet head over there."

"Oh my god." You clamp your hands over your mouths to keep from laughing.

"Oh-oh! I think I found your future husband if Papyrus doesn't work out." Tamsin elbows you. She points out a figure in leather, sat at a table and chatting with a few women in heavy makeup. You squint, his back is facing you. But Tamsin isn't wrong, he looks quite similar to Papyrus in both height and stature. Maybe a little shorter. The fur trim of his hood hides his head, but if he were to turn you'd get a view of his face.

"Eh, that's a lot of leather. You sure he isn't a cow?" You joke.

"No, look at his hands! That's totally a skeleton of some kind!"

"Wait, really?"

You lean to the edge of your stool, trying to peer past the crowd and get a look at the person's hands. Sure enough, two bone-white phalanges rest against the table. A glass of brown liquid is grasped in one of them. There are familiar circular holes cut into each palm, but you only know of two skeletons with those markings, Papyrus and-

Their head turns suddenly, and you make direct eye contact with the skeleton's glowing pupils.

"Holy shit!" You almost fall off your stool, just managing to steady its legs. Your hands clasp around Tamsin's arm and spin her around to face the bar with you. "What are you-"

"Don't look! That's my roommates' one-nighter." You explain in hushed tones, your mouth practically pressed to her ear for you to be heard.

"Woah, really?!" She tries to look back but you grab her face.

"No! Don't look! He might come over!"

"Too late." Your heart drops at the husky voice suddenly by your side.

"Hi!" Tamsin greets with a perky wave.

"Oh my god..." you grumble, resting your face in your palms.

"Well, that's no way to greet a friend." The skeleton smirks, taking an empty seat beside you. You want to walk out right here and now, but that would mean leaving Tamsin alone with this lecherous creature.

"We're not friends." You retort tiredly. "We're hardly even acquaintances."

"Y/n!" Tamsin gasps, jabbing you in the ribs. You clutch your torso and shoot her a scowl.

"Y/n, huh?"

A chill travels down your spine. The monster rolls your name around on his tongue with a gleeful look. Somehow you feel violated just hearing him say your name.

"No! That isn't what she said!" You try to cover up the damage, but it's already been done.

"Oh, I think it is. And what happens to be your name?" He directs the question to Tamsin, looking past your shoulder.

"I'm Tamsin~" She coos coyly.

"A pleasure, Tamsin. I'm G." He holds out a skeletal hand and she shakes it delicately. Now it's your turn to jab her in the ribcage.

"Could you please give us a moment, G?" You ask through gritted teeth.

"Sure thing." He winks and stands up, strolling back to the table he'd previously been sat at.

You whirl on your pink-haired colleague. "What the hell was that?! You told him my name!"

"Yeah? So?"

"I don't want him to know my name, Tammie! He slept with my roommate! I don't want to get friendly with her one-night-stands!"

"Well no offence, but your roommate has great taste." She smirks, darting her eyes over to G. He's already surrounded by girls, they're practically hanging from his arms!

"You're a lesbian, Tamsin." You deadpan.

"I know. Isn't it crazy? He's not even my type yet he's making me feel hot between the thighs. I might just convert if it means a night with him in the sac."

You actually want to gag right now. Your bestie, the lesbian, has just been turned bi-sexual by a skeleton. Do skeletons even have reproductive organs?! You know monsters use some kind of magic to reproduce, but what sort you've no idea.

No. Wait. They must have something. Or how else did G make Nicki produce all those sexual noises that night?

No, no. Now is not the time to think about that Y/n! Focus on keeping Tamsin from fucking a skeleton!

"Hey!" You snap your fingers in front of her face, gaining her attention. "No fucking him, got it? Or I'll disown you as a friend."

She pouts and folds her arms, "aw, you're no fun. I was only joking. Well, sort of."

"Tammie."

G pushes his way back to the bar before you can get into scolding the woman.

"So ladies, what brings you here?" He asks, setting a now-empty glass on the bar.

"Y/n came here to get laid!" Tamsin exclaims before you can stop her, planting her hands on your shoulders.

"No! No, I did not!" You retort, glaring at your colleague.

G laughs, causing you to throw a glare his way. He slaps his knee and almost doubles over against the bar.

"And why are you laughing?!" You demand hotly, both embarrassed and offended. Why does he find the idea of you getting laid so funny? Does he think you're unappealing?

"S-sorry." He snickers, "I just didn't peg you as the wild type."

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

"It means you act like a total stick-in-the-mud." He grins.

"Oooh."

"Tamsin shut up."

You narrow your eyes at the skeleton. "I will have you know I could pick up any guy I wanted at this place."

"Is that so?"

"Yes, it is."

"Then care to make a bet?"

"What do you have in mind?"

Tamsin is practically vibrating with excitement in her seat, watching as you take on the monster.

"If I win, you never step foot in my house again." You wager, jabbing a manicured nail at the skeleton.

"Then if I win, I want your number." He responds devilishly.

You hold out your hand and shake.

"First one to get the most attractive date wins." You finalise. Tamsin squeals excitedly, watching as human and monster stand from their seats and make their way into the crowd of dancing bodies.