Unfortunately, everyone else had to go with as well. Casian, although knowing where Andreas’ lived, had no idea how to get there from our present location. The easiest method of travel for us would’ve been to simply use Raphael and his teleportation spell, but I still refused to go near him. Casian understood, even though he insisted our time was limited. I would rather follow Kalen than Raphael.

Eric and Raphael hung to the back of the group as we started our journey on foot. James had decided to stay behind and wait for Zane to arrive and sent Natalia with me to make sure I remained safe. While she and I had sort of made up earlier that day, I still wasn’t sure if I could trust her with my life. At this point, I knew that task fell to me, and to me alone.

Mallory and Natalia were fast friends, choosing to walk close to each other in front of me, locked in a conversation I couldn’t overhear. Kalen was standing close by, chiming here and there, but I caught his eyes traveling over to me. That left Casian, walking next to me with a small figure covered in a cloth next to him.

“I’m sure you have a lot of questions,” Casian said, his soft smile reflected in his eyes. “Feel free to ask them, we have time before we get there, I’m sure.”

I nervously tugged at my fingers, suddenly unsure where to begin. Something about Casian was oddly unnerving. The way he carried himself didn’t suggest a man who was up until recently deceased. I wasn’t sure what to make of that. He seemed so sure of himself. I wondered at what prompted that. “Well, I guess my first question would be how it’s possible that you are alive if you were truly dead up until a couple of days ago.”

Casian scratched his head. “I’m not quite sure about how that works myself. All I know is I owe my life to this guy over here.” He gestured at the small figure I had noticed earlier, piquing my interest even more. The figure revealed his face and my eyes suddenly widened.

“A baby dragon?” I remembered reading about dragons in many of my books, but never really considered that they’d be real. I wasn’t too surprised though, considering that we lived in a world where magic was possible. It was a shock to see a dragon up close nonetheless.

Casian proceeded to explain the only version of events he knew. He said that his life was linked to the dragon as he had been chosen to be its dragon lord before the dragon was even born, thus causing him to still age even while he was dead. The story seemed unbelievable in theory, but at this point I was beyond being surprised by the mysteries our world hid. He was brought back to life when the dragon hatched.

For a while after, we walked in silence. Kalen was laughing at something Mallory had said, and the sound reminded me of when we spent time together. It felt like a lifetime ago while in reality it hadn’t been more than a couple of weeks ago. So much had happened in so little time. I turned my attention back to Casian, afraid my thoughts were leading down a dangerous path.

“If you don’t mind me asking, but how did you die?”

He gave me a small smile. “I don’t mind you asking at all. I died of an illness when I was sixteen. It had plagued me for months, and it finally seemed like I was going to get better. Only I hadn’t.” Casian paused, seeming to consider his next words carefully. “Physicians had assured my parents that I would be fine, and so they continued with vacation plans they had made weeks prior. I stayed with Andreas, not well enough to travel with them. But I knew, and he knew that I wasn’t going to get better. I know Andreas has done many terrible things in his life after my death, and the death of his family, but he does have his reasons, Lana. He was the only person who stayed by my said as the illness claimed my life.”

“He never told me that,” I said in a small voice.

“I don’t imagine it’s something he likes to relive.”

I nodded, afraid of my voice.

Casian placed his hand on my shoulder, a gesture meant to comfort, but wasn’t doing much to calm my raging emotions. “I know he’s given you reason to question his motives, but beneath his dark façade there is only a man that isn’t willing to give himself a chance at love.”

“How do you know that for certain?”

“After you ‘died’, Raphael placed him in the Crystal Cove, a place that cancels out all dark magic. I don’t know how much you know of the Cove…?”

“Not much,” I admitted. “But I only recently found out I had magic as well…. My knowledge at this point is very limited.”

“Well, the Cove is known to test anyone that enters it. It’s an endless maze, and only the pure of heart are shown a way out of it. The pure of heart, or those with a destiny that has yet to be fulfilled. Still, the Cove makes sure that the person, whether destined or pure of heart, is worthy of leaving the cover before allowing them to leave. In Andreas’ case, his tests included shadows of the past. People he once knew that have died. I was one of those shadows, and I can only imagine who else.”

“You’ve talked to him recently then?” I asked, but my mind kept thinking about who else might have visited him. How much pain would those ghosts have caused him?

Casian’s eyes darkened. “I have. He truly believes you are dead, and he blames himself. He blames himself for so many things, and while I hope he’s found his way out by now, there is always a chance that he doesn’t think he deserves to get out.”

“I don’t know what to believe.”

“I don’t blame you. But try to understand where he was coming from. He’s lost everyone he’s ever allowed himself to care about, and he was only trying to push you away to keep you safe. But I could tell how much that has destroyed him.”

I took in a deep ragged breath. “Casian, I understand that he’s your friend and it’s your job to defend him, but please understand why I can’t just forgive him even if his intentions were good. There are so many ways he could’ve gone about pushing me away or keeping me at arm’s length, but he chose to hurt me instead. I know he’s had a difficult life and he’s had to deal with losing everyone he cares about, but that can’t be an excuse for the way he treated me.” I closed my eyes briefly, blinking away the traitorous tears that were threatening to fall. It was hard to say all of that to Casian, especially considering how much I did in fact care about him. If it came down to it, I wasn’t sure whether or not I’d be willing to forgive him on the spot or not. All I knew was that it was about time I became stronger, more resolute. I’d made this decision when I left Raphael and Eric, but it was a harder resolution to stick by than I could’ve imagined. But nobody could just become stronger overnight. It took work, a lot of it. I was determined to stop being the person everyone needed to save.

“I understand how you feel, Lana. I really do. All I ask is that you give him a chance. I know the person who cared enough to stay by my side while I had no one else is still in him somewhere. He just needs someone to bring it back out. He’s made mistakes, ones not easily forgiven, but I refuse to believe he’s beyond redemption.”

The walk became silent after that. The sky had darkened, a couple of stars peeking their faces from behind the clouds. Eric and Raphael were locked in a fierce whisper. I was still curious why they had kept me, but I chose to ignore them instead. I was vaguely wondering how they ended up with Kalen and Casian in the first place, but I didn’t want to ask. In front of us, Natalia and Mallory were still chatting lively, and I noticed Kalen walking off to the side by himself. I suddenly felt bad about everything that had happened between the two of us, especially considering the monumental news he had gotten only a short while ago.

I left Casian’s side and tugged on Kalen’s arm. He turned to me, his eyes questioning. “Can we talk?” I asked, my voice soft. I knew I had a lot to apologize for. Kalen nodded and fell into step next to me.

“What’s bothering you?” he asked with a slight smile.

I kept my hand on his arm. “I need to apologize to you. I realize I wasn’t being one hundred percent fair when we spoke earlier.”

His expression softened. “You have no reason to apologize, Lana. I understand. Our emotions were running high, everything was a lot to take in for both of us.”

“No, please, let me apologize. I overreacted and I shouldn’t have. I had no right to feel offended that you were trying to help out Mallory.”

He pulled me into a one-armed hug and I wrapped my arms around his waist. For a while we walked like that, and I didn’t care whose eyes landed on us.

“You love him, don’t you?” Kalen asked. All the stars had come out by now and everyone started showing signs of fatigue.

“I don’t know. I’ve never really known love, so I can’t be sure.”

Kalen smiled sadly. “But you feel a greater connection to him than you ever did to me.”

I dropped my one arm from around him. Yet another way in which I haven’t been fair to him. “I do. But I was trying to move on from him. He had made it clear that he didn’t want me, and I wanted to stop the pain. And you were so kind, I honestly thought –“

Kalen cut me off before I could finish my thought. “You don’t have to explain, Lana. I knew exactly what I was walking into the moment I decided to get close to you. I saw the way Andreas looked at you, but chose to ignore it. I wanted to be better at something than he was. But I saw the connection between the two of you almost instantly. I was never going to end up winning you from him.”

“You seem awfully sure of that.”

He raised his eyebrows. “And you’re not? Aren’t we setting out at this very moment to prove to him that you are still alive?”

I shook my head. “I’m still not sure what to believe, Kalen. I’m not sure you know exactly how poorly Andreas had treated me before you showed up. Yes, he had his moments, but that doesn’t excuse the way he chose to go about pushing me away.”

“But you want to forgive him, I can see it.”

“Wanting to, and being able to, are two very different things.”

Kalen squeezed my shoulders. “I just hope we can come out of this as friends at the very least. Perhaps you and I can try that?”

I smiled, leaning my head into his chest. “I would like that very much.”

He kissed my head before releasing me. “I think it’s time we rested for the night.”