Their trip back across the desert was far less eventful and certainly less bloody than their first trip, though there was a definite weight that settled over the group as they traveled nearer to the Dark Forest.

Mad could practically taste the fight that awaited him. It was sweet with a bitter kick at the end and Mad knew the others could sense there was something wrong. But he could do nothing to ease their minds, so he just tried to ignore the heavy atmosphere as best he could.

Alice and Cheshire were constantly sending Mad these little concerned looks that grated slightly against his nerves. He couldn't tell what was worse though. The fact that those two kept looking at him, or the fact that Killian and Dinah wouldn't look at him at all.

Mad woke up early their last morning in the desert. He knew they would reach the boundary river by noon at the latest. He wasn't sure what had woken him.

The sky was a pale grey streaked through with soft orange and clear yellow and Mad could just barely see the last remnants of dull stars in the south. He stood up quietly to find the others still asleep, but he didn't wake them just yet.

Mad took a small moment to just watch them. To enjoy how peaceful they looked.

Mad felt rather peaceful himself. He was no longer plagued by nightmares. In fact, he didn't dream at all, or, if he did, they were unmemorable. He hadn't heard Gene in a long time either.

Mad inhaled deeply, the early morning air cool and sweet. He had an idea as to why he was so at peace though it didn't necessarily make an awful lot of sense. Mad smiled a little, watching the sun come up. He had given up on the fact that anything had to make sense a long time ago.

He was peaceful, because he had finally just acknowledged the fact that he wanted to fight.

Mad had spent so long being at war that he didn't know how to do anything else, and it was a relief to just admit it. It was surprising how much havoc denial could cause a person. Mad had spent a long time pretending that there wasn't a fight waving a red flag right in front of his face. Or, he had spent a long time avoiding it, and that cut at his pride.

He was going back to war, so his mind didn't have to come up with things for him to fight. Mad was finding peace in the middle of the storm.

Mad watched as the sun banished the lingering night, then woke the others. The only thing he was actually dreading was when they reached the forest. Then, he'd have to tell Alice and Cheshire.

Mad knew that would be the hardest part of all of this.

The sun was directly overhead when they reached the forest. After they crossed the river, Mad stopped.

This was it.

"Mad?" Alice asked when she noticed his hesitation.

Mad turned to Chesh then and, making his voice as commanding as he knew how to, said, "Cheshire. You are going with Alice. You are going to keep them safe."

Chesh's ears immediately flattened and he showed his teeth, but he was pinned down by Mad's order. Mad hadn't given him the chance to argue. He knew that wasn't fair, but he wasn't going to risk Cheshire following him into this battle.

"What are you talking about Mad?" Alice asked, her eyes very wide and very blue. Mad stood in front of her and kissed her forehead gently. Her skin was cold despite the day's warmth.

"I'm not going with you," Mad explained softly.

"Then... where are you going?" Alice asked, her voice suddenly scared and sounding very young.

"I'm going to get Tamsus before he gets us." Mad said, his voice filled with a confidence he didn't necessarily feel. Cheshire hissed so violently it shook his entire body and Alice's hand went up to cover her mouth.

"No!" she yelled, her eyes shiny with angry tears.

"He's right," Killian said, putting a hand on Alice's shoulder. Mad noticed as Dinah edged closer to a frozen Cheshire, brushing her head softly against his shoulder, already keeping her promise to Mad.

Mad turned away from Cheshire's gaze, trying to ignore the look of betrayal flashing there. He didn't say anything to Chesh. There was nothing he could say.

Alice started crying in earnest when Killian said, "If anyone stands a chance against the Heart's Ace, it's Mad."

The sound and sight of Alice's tears very nearly brought Mad to his knees, sucking away his resolve to leave her. In that moment, he would have done just about anything to stop them.

But he couldn't give her what she wanted. Not with this. There was just no other option.

"I'm sorry Alice," Mad whispered. She was breaking his heart. He could feel it cracking up in his chest.

Mad hadn't known he had enough of a heart left to break. He hadn't realized it would be this hard. If he had, he would have left the very night he had told Killian of his plans. He would have taken off by himself, then picked up the pieces if he'd made it back.

Mad turned sharply. If he stayed any longer, she would be his undoing, her tears unraveling the thread of his resolve. And yet, still he hesitated.

He kissed her forehead again, shook Killian's hand and ran, sprinting into the forest away from her once again. Grimacing, he couldn't help but feel like a coward, running from her like this, and the sensation sickened him.

When he had run so far that his lungs burned and his legs shook, Mad slowed. He could still hear Alice crying, but it wasn't an actual sound. Just an echo in his mind, trying to torture him. His peace was gone.

He walked on, heading to the residence the Queen had given him when he'd refused to live in Heart Castle. Tamsus would find him there. That's where Mad had always been after he had learned to stop running. It would be just like old times.

It took Mad the rest of that day and most of the next to get to the house and what he found there brought him up short.

The burnt skeleton of the house was black and spindly in the waning forest light. The only thing really left was the stone chimney, standing lonely and proud amidst the rubble.

Mad stood looking at the wreckage, half of his plans suddenly thrown out the window, until it started to rain. He jumped when he was startled by a large drop hitting his shoulder and sighed, looking up at the low, black clouds that would hide the stars and moons tonight.

Mad moved farther into the cover of the trees, pulling a rain proofed jacket out of his pack that had been furnished to him by Killian. The material was a slick, treated leather, lighter than it looked, and Mad sent Killian a silent thanks. Wonderland's weather was often unpredictable and Mad appreciated the fact that he wouldn't get completely drenched tonight.

He sat in a small alcove made of a thicket of bushes surrounding a large elm tree, breathing in the familiar green scent of the forest. Mad settled against the tree, pleased with the fact that this spot provided an excellent screen, yet also managed to give him a full view of what was around him. It was ideal.

Mad wasn't going to move if he didn't have to. The rain would wash away any tracks he'd left earlier and if he didn't move, he wouldn't make new tracks. Even Tamsus couldn't follow tracks that weren't there.

The rain in Wonderland sang, the drops hitting the leaves making a complex melody interspersed with the crack of thunder and the vocalization of the wind through the branches.

Mad usually liked the rain, but not tonight.

Tonight, the song left him in a bubble of overwhelming sound that would make it too easy for someone or something to get near. The occasional lightening blinded him every now and then and all the birds were hidden away, so Mad couldn't rely on them as an early alarm system.

All of that and the rain was cold, trying to stiffen his muscles and slow his reactions.

Mad sat and waited. This was the second hardest part of this decision. Mad had never been an overly patient man, but patience was required here. Going off half-cocked would be a wasted effort. An effort that would likely get him killed easily.

And easily was not the way Mad intended to die.

Unfortunately, Mad knew he would have to let Tamsus make the first move. That way, Mad could find his pattern. All hunters had a pattern and Tamsus was no exception. It was just that Tamsus had more patterns than most.

So Mad did his best to wait and keep his mind clear, trying to will the calm he had felt this morning back to him.

He wasn't jittery. His hands were steady.

It was just that, now, he desperately wanted to make it back to the others alive.