I just want to thank you all for sticking with me this far. It still amazes me how much you love this story as much as I do. I'm even thinking about writing a sequel when this one is all done. 

Here's to you. Enjoy
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Laura's POV 

Today was Mr. Compton's funeral. I wasn't sure if it was a good idea to go but I knew no amount of debating would change my mind. I had to go. I was too close to their family not to go and pay my respects. Plus Edith would appreciate my presence.

I pulled a sweater over my black lace dress and stared at my reflection. I usually wore all black anyway but this time it was morbid. I hated wearing black when I was in a case like this. 

"Where are you going?"

I didn't have time to go by home so I had to change at Will's. 

"The funeral." I knew he didn't want me to go because of Chris. 

"I don't want you to go." He came up behind me. 

"I'm not surprised you feel that way." 

He crossed his arms over his broad chest. That's not a good sign.  

"I don't think it's a good idea Laura."

I sighed. "Will I've known their family for as long as I can remember. I have to go."

He dropped his gaze to the floor and I knew he was surrendering. I went to him and wrapped my arms around his torso. 

He probably didn't trust me. Could I blame him? I kissed his tensed muscles. "I won't stay long."

I traced the fresh scars on his face. Chris did one hell of a job. "What were you thinking?" I whispered referring to the fight. 

"He punched me first."

I wouldn't put it passed Chris either. But Will must have said something to fire him up. 

"What were you fighting about?"

He kissed the top of my head. "It doesn't matter."

Was he kidding? "Will, that fight could have cost you your job. Of course it matters."

He pulled out of my arms. "Drop it Laura."

I hated when he told me to do something, Especially something like this. 

"No I won't drop it. You guys almost killed each other."

Will's eyes went cold. "Well that would have solved some problems now wouldn't it."

Wow. I couldn't believe he was being like this. I understood his anger but why was he being so nasty. 

"What's wrong with you?" This side of him was scaring me. 

He laughed. "What's wrong with me? Do you want to know what we were fighting about? Cause I'll tell you." His eyes were blazed with insanity. "Chris mentioned how you enjoyed the kiss he forced on you."

My stomach dropped. I figured it was about me but I didn't think Chris would tell him about the kiss. 

"How you kissed him back."

I didn't know what to say. I couldn't deny it, he would see right through me. I stared at the floor because I couldn't take his crazed and hurt face. 

His rough hands yanked my chin up. "Oh no baby. You're not backing down now."

Will's hand clawed my hip, keeping me in place and from running away.

"It's confession time baby girl. So tell me, the honest truth, did you enjoy it?"

His lips were at my ears as he whispered it, making him sound more dangerous and on the edge.

"Did you like having his tongue down your throat? "

His nails were digging into the skin on my back, painfully. "Will please stop."

"Answer the damn question Laura."

This wasn't Will. He would never act violent towards me. It had to be the medicine he took. It had to be. 

"Let me go first." He was seriously hurting me. 

"I'm not so sure I should. Every time you're out of my mists you seem to find yourself struggling to stay faithful to me." 

My hand instantly went up and I slapped him. I took advantage of his shock and pushed away from him.  

"Laura I didn't..." He was sorry now but the words were already said.

I grabbed my purse. "I have to go."

"Laura wait." 

I was already out the door. I told him about it. If I wasn't faithful then I would have kept it to myself. I kept trying to find ways to justify my actions. 

I was a good girlfriend and still am. Ahhh, I just wanted to scream. This was all happening because of Chris. If he hadn't come back Will and I would be alright. And if Chris hadn't left in the first place there would be no Will and I. 

Either way, my misery was his fault. 

They're were so many people in black. So many people paying their respects. Clark's mom was the first I greeted. 

"I'm so sorry for your loss."

She gave me a weak smile and went in for a hug. "I'm so glad you're here."

"Me too."

We pulled away. "I was hoping to have a word with you in private."

That was weird. What would she want to talk about? 

I followed her to a near by gazebo. The weather was beautiful today. 

"How are you holding up dear?"

I was confused. "Shouldn't I be asking you that question?"

Again she smiled but I was suspicious. "Yes I suppose you're right but it's not everyday you have two boys fighting over you."

I think my mouth literally dropped. 

She laughed at my expression. "Oh yes dear I figured it out."

"How?"

"He's different since you. Chris isn't always so ... sad when he's with you."

Why was she telling me this? "Chris is a difficult person to be around."

"He beats himself up too much."

I didn't understand why. "Why? Why does he?"

"When his father died, Chris just couldn't find that kind of approval again. He puts up a defense and tries so hard to hide it."

Pushing people away is just his way of dealing with everything. He wanted to be alone because that's what he believes he deserves. This was so sad. 

"He cares about you Laura and he just needs someone who won't give up on him."

"Why are you telling me this?" To make my life more messed up. 

"Be his friend."

"I-" I chocked. "I can't." I can't be his friend. I can't just be his friend, not after everything. It was impossible. 

"You love him, don't you?" She was looking at me like she knew a secret. 

I couldn't open my mouth and say no. I couldn't physically...or mentally admit no. 

The smile she gave me next was almost brighter than the sun.  "I think that's all he's ever wanted. Someone to love him and not because they had to like family. No. Someone who wants and needs to love him. Like it was the only thing keeping them alive."

I felt my heart literally breaking at her declaration. 

I was frozen in place. She leaned in and kissed my temple. "I need to go but I'll see you around dear. Think about what I said."

Did I love him? I thought I was over him. I thought I loved Will and only Will. 

Why was my life such a pain in the ass? 

When I got back everyone was crowded around the coffin while the minster said a few words. Chris was standing alone, away from the rest of his family. His black tailored suit made him look paler than usual but he was still beautifully handsome as ever.

I swallowed my pride as well as my promise to Will and went to stand next to Chris. He needed a friend and I just wanted to take that pain away.

He didn't look at me as I approached. His eyes were glued to his grandfather's coffin. I took his hand in my own. It was the only way I could think of comforting him. Eventually he laced our fingers together and I knew I made the right move. He needed me and I knew he would have done the same for me. 

The service went quickly and soon they were dropping the coffin into the steep hole. The moment was bitter but in a sense sweet. I believed with my whole heart he was going to a better place, heaven. 

The Compton family decided to all go to Clark's house. Chris wouldn't let go of my hand and I knew he didn't want to go with the rest of his family. He was a loner. He would rather suffer in silence. 

"Do you want me to take you home?"

I don't know what possessed me to ask but I did. 

Chris nodded and I lead him to my car. The car ride there was quiet, but that was expected. What was there to talk about? I felt like anything I say would be pointless. 

As soon as I pulled into the driveway Chris unbuckled his seatbelt. "Thank you for the ride." Then he got up and went into the house. 

Chris was not alright. That was clear. I just didn't know what to do. I wanted to be mad at him. I wanted to even hate him and not hate him sweetly but like really hate him. Why couldn't I hate him? 

I got out of my car and regretted each step I was taking towards the door. I couldn't back down now; my conscious wouldn't let me. 

I found Chris in his room just standing by the window, lifeless. He wasn't even really staring out, you could tell his mind was somewhere else. 

"Chris?" He didn't even look up. I went and stood in front of him. Even with my heels on he was still a foot taller than me. 

"Chris," I whispered his name and ran my fingers across his scared face. Those wounds only added to the hell he looked like he was in.

His emerald eyes finally met mine. They were on the verge of tears. Instinctively my arms embraced him and I held him tight.

I wanted to cry with him. His pain was too much to bear. I would do anything to take some of the burden from him. His arms slowly snaked around my body and I felt him relax a bit. 

I gently ran my fingers through his hair. "I'm so sorry Chris."

He shook his head. "No I'm sorry, for everything. I never meant to hurt you."

"I know Chris. I know." I wanted to sooth his worries on our relationship. It should be the last thing on his mind now. 

"I didn't know what to do Laura, these feelings. My head was telling me one thing and my body was forced to do another. I was so confused. " 

He was rambling but I wasn't sure what he was trying to say. I don't think even he understood.

"Shhh it's okay Chris. Everything's going to be fine." I would make sure of it. 

"But it's not Laura. Everything is so screwed up and all I do is wrong."

No. I pulled away so I could look at his face. I needed him to understand me. "No Chris. We make mistakes but you're not always wrong. Life just doesn't always go as we planned. It's screwed up, messy, and uncontrollable."

He smiled. It honestly warmed my heart to see it too.

His hand went to my face and he pushed a few of my hairs back. "Like us?"

I smiled back. "Like us."

Chris closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to mine. Our synced uneven breathing was soothing to hear. I missed him. It was hard to admit but after all this time I still  missed him like crazy. 

"Don't leave, " he pleaded.

"I should."

"Everyone leaves," he whispered much to softly.

He was making it so hard. 

"Please," he whispered again kissing my neck. "Stay with me." The touch of his lips on my skin brought back the old fire I had for him, and only him. This fire could ignite a whole village. 

"I can't." 

He moved back and I was already missing the warmth of his body. 

"You can't forgive me, can you?" He sounded so defeated like he was being punched in the stomach. 

I wanted to die. This was so hard. My emotions were on a rampage."Chris that's not- "

"I understand," he wasn't even looking at me anymore. He was looking past me, stuck in his own daze. "You don't have to say anything."

He crumbled onto the couch. "I couldn't breathe for the longest time. I felt like I was being suffocated by my family, by my friends, by me ." 

His confession left me motionless. 

"I wanted to hate you...in the beginning. I wanted something to hate." He smiled but it barely showed."You made it difficult."

I went and kneeled in front of him. I didn't know what else to do. He was breaking down in in front of me. 

"I missed you Laura. I missed you so much." 

He cupped my cheek. "You want to know the difficult part in hating you."

I nodded. 

"With every kiss I felt it. I felt your kindness, your forgiveness, your love. I couldn't hate you."

He had tears in his eyes and I instantly pulled him into my arms. "I know Chris. I know."

"I need you."

I shook my head because words just wouldn't come out. 

"Then why," he said with his eyes hopeful. "Why would God make us feel this way? Make us feel all these emotions and not let us be together?" 

That was a really good question. We were so close to each other. I could smell his peppermint breath so clear my heart sped up. 

I sensed the yearning in his eyes. 

He gave me time to pull away but I didn't. Our lips met and I felt it. I felt the kindness, the forgiveness, and the love. But Chris couldn't love me. 

I broke the kiss and got up. My head was spinning.

"I need you."

"No, no you're wrong."

"Not about this." He was so confident. 

Now it was me who was crying. "I can't give you want you need."

"You're everything I need."

"No," I shook my head. "No."

"Laura look at me."

I did. His green eyes were melting me. "How can you love me when you can't love yourself? How can you be with me when you can't forgive yourself?"

I didn't want to hurt him but I had to. 

"I want to be the one you need Chris. I do. I want you and I want your love but this isn't right. I'm not the one you need right now."

I forced myself to turn around. The look on his face was too much to bear. "I'm sorry." Then I walked out because I knew it was the right thing to do. 

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