"Hey, Wizkids!" Prof. James exclaimed enthusiastically,  waving his wand invitingly (is that even a proper word?) At his webcam.

He was a lonely man, he'll admit but that did not mean he had lost all enthusiasm to his ex-toilet.

"Hope you all are staying safe from this virus. I know it must be tough, not being able to see your friends or smoke Dumbleweed with Sybil, but it's fine. Because da- si- Mister Charles is here for you. Mwah. Now then,  do we have our assignments ready?"

"Nah, bruv," one student admitted, bravely. Ready for James to pick his brain, he turned on his camera.

"Now, sister Ben, you know that is not acceptable class etiquette. Why, oh why, do I not have your shiny piece of work on my desk,  girlboysister?"

"My brother Richie ate it, innit," he admitted, bracing himself for the consequences.

"He.. he ate your Google doc?"

"Ugh, yeah. Got a go,another class and all that," he was gone.

Now, to his favourite student.

"Harry, bobkins,  do you have your ASSIGNMENT?"

"Yasir, I've been studying your ear lobes,"s Harry breathed creepily into his mic.