"How are the Occlamency lessons going?"

"It's hard. I'm always worried about him finding out."

"Harry. Maybe you should just tell him."

Harry sighed and shook his head. "I can't, Hermione. If I tell him and he rejects me I wouldn't be able to survive."

Hermione shook her head. "You're just being dramatic."

Harry shrugged and left. Maybe he was being a little dramatic. Maybe something good could actually happen. He didn't want to chance it though. He didn't want to have to hide his face and miss class. If Severus ever found out he would be so embarrassed. So what if he was in love with his professor. That was his secret.

Harry took a deep breath as he entered the room. He focused on the lesson ahead in an attempt to forget about his conversation. As usual Severus relentlessly invaded his thoughts and Harry did everything he could to repel him. Unfortunately it wasn't enough and Harry had been distracted.

Images of his friends turned to images of Hermione and then they became voiceless videos. Seeing that, Harry panicked and the last of his defenses crumbled. The sound came through as a whisper at first then he heard his confession in full. Seemingly out of nowhere Severus' image started to flood Harry's mind.

Severus stumbled back as he left the confines of Harry's mind. Harry stared at him in silence. There was fear in Harry's eyes. Severus didn't know what to do or say. His own mind was still processing what he had just witnessed. He was questioning the legitimacy of it all.

Harry slowly stood up and Severus saw him shaking. It made sense considering what had just happened. Harry slowly made his way to the door with his head down. He couldn't look at Severus because he was too embarrassed. Severus sighed and walked to the door in front of Harry. He was blocking Harry from leaving.

"Professor." Harry croaked. "I'd like to return to my room."

"Sit down Harry." Severus said.

"I'd like to..." Harry sighed. "Just let me go."

Severus knew that Harry wouldn't listen to him again if he let things stand as they were. He had already sorted though his thoughts and honestly he was flattered. Actually he was happy. More than he cared to admit. Severus himself had been hiding a secret, he had developed unsure feelings for Harry.

"Professor please." Harry started to cry.

Severus sighed and reached forward. He cupped Harry's cheek and wiped away some of his tears. Harry slowly lifted his head to look up at Severus. Severus smiled slightly and leaned forward. The shock left Harry motionless. Severus was actually kissing him. Harry couldn't believe that was happening.

Harry pushed Severus away and stared at him. Severus accepted it. Maybe it was too good to be true after all. At least that's what went through Severus' mind. Whatever he thought he felt for Harry he would never be able to explore it. That had been a decision he had made long before this had happened.

"I'm sorry." Severus stepped aside. "That was unbecoming of me."

"Why did you kiss me?"

"I was hoping it was true. My apologies. Don't worry about it too much." Severus sighed and walked to a chair.

He flopped down and hung his head back. Sure his whole attitude had just changed instantly but this was what he was normally like. His arm covered his eyes as he thought about how he could have better handled the situation. Maybe Harry had wanted to hear him say something, but what was he supposed to have said?

Harry hesitated at the door. He touched his fingers to his lips and turned to face Severus. He had prepared himself for a rejection, instead he had learnt something new about his professor. Harry walked over to Severus and sat on his lap.

"What are you doing?" Severus sighed.

"Getting your attention."

"You're going to get more than that if you don't leave." Severus mumbled under his breath more to himself.

"Your attitude changed a lot." Harry sighed.

"Should I have kept pretending?"

Harry giggled. "No. I want to know the real you."

Severus smiled a little. "Really? You might not like what you see."

Harry rolled his eyes. "I doubt it's as bad as how you usually are."

Severus brushed Harry's cheek with the back of his hand. He really wanted to believe everything. He was hopeful but also hesitant. He knew that there were things about himself that would probably chase Harry away. Things he hated and things he regretted. There were a lot of bad things he had done.

Harry leaned forward and rested his head on Severus' shoulder. "Whatever is holding you back I'm sure it's not all that bad."

Severus sighed. "You should head back to your room."

Harry sat up and pursed his lips. Severus knew how he felt and probably felt the same. For now that was a win. The overburdened and exhausted attitude wasn't something Severus ever let show. Another win in Harry's opinion. As long as Severus showed him little bits of his true self, Harry was okay with it.

"I'll make you fall in love with me." Harry smiled.

"You should just give up. I can't give you what you want."

"If you had let me leave. If you hadn't kissed me. Maybe I would have." Harry shrugged. "I would have never bothered you again. Now I want more than just your attention. So I'll make you believe that I love you and make you fall in love with me."

Severus chuckled as Harry got up. His broken heart wanted to believe it was possible. He wanted to believe that he had a chance at happiness. Harry left the room and he sighed. If Voldemort found out about this he would surely end up dead. He would be the bait to lure Harry.

Harry chewed his lip as he made his way back to his room. He was trembling so much. His nervous had been worn thin and it had taken everything to stay calm. His false bravado had barely stayed intact. He had wanted to leave immediately but Severus had looked so hurt and so desperate.

"You're back pretty late." Hermione frowned.

"He kissed me." Harry sighed. "He found out and then kissed me."

"That's great!" Hermione cheered.

Harry smiled. "My nerves are a mess, but I didn't want to leave until I knew he'd be okay."

Hermione patted his back. "Go sleep and tell me about it in the morning. I want to hear everything."

~~~~~

Harry sighed as he sat down for dinner. Severus' usual attitude had returned and Harry was disappointed. He was more than just hopeful, but it seemed nothing had changed. Maybe what happened hadn't really meant anything. At least that's what Harry was telling himself. He had missed the truth.

After telling Hermione everything she was super supportive. However, her support didn't stop him from being restless. He wanted to know why. Why had Severus acted so normal? Why had he not shown his true self? Why did it hurt so much?

Harry got out of bed and grabbed his invisibility cloak. He couldn't sleep until he had answers. He made his way to Severus' room. A silent hope that the man was still awake. Hoping that Severus wouldn't turn him away. Harry sighed and knocked at the door. As it opened he took off the clock.

"Harry?" Severus raised an eyebrow.

"Why... How? How can you act like nothing happened?" Harry sighed as tears started to form.

"I have practice." Severus whispered. "As I said. I can't give you what you want. So give up."

Harry wiped at his face. "You're a liar. You tricked me. You..."

Severus quickly closed the gap between them and kissed Harry. He hated seeing Harry so hurt over him. Harry kissed him back almost immediately. He knew what Severus really meant and it hurt even more. Severus bent to pick Harry up without breaking the kiss and carried him into the room.

Harry only had more questions about everything now. His mind could understand what and why Severus was doing everything he was doing. It was his heart that couldn't accept it. He knew the risks to both of them if Voldemort found out. He knew that not everyone would look favourably on their relationship.

"I'm sorry Harry." Severus sighed. "Please just forget your feelings for me. Please forget how weak my resolve is."

Harry woke up the next morning with a headache. His eyes were puffy and he couldn't remember why. It was obvious he had been crying but why was he crying. His head ached everytime he tried to remember what had happened. He knew something was off but didn't know what that was.

The day felt like it dragged on for far too long. Harry was exhausted and in pain. It didn't help that Severus Snape was being cruel to him. It didn't help that Draco Malfoy was looking for a fight with him. All Harry wanted to do was sleep. He wanted the headache to go away. Madam Pomfry couldn't even help.

Somehow things started to blur together in Harry's mind. Days were hours, hours were weeks, weeks were months, and months were days. Nothing made sense to him and if it wasn't for Hermione he wouldn't have made it through every day. The end of school was coming and Harry would have totally overlooked it.

"Hey!"

"Sorry!" Harry yelled.

"Seriously. You woke us up so freaked out and then zoned out."

Harry sighed. "I did? I don't know why though."

Hermione sighed. "I've had enough of this."

She stood up and dragged Harry after her. 2 months had been more than long enough. Whatever happened to Harry she knew Snape had something to do with it. Ron, Ginny and the twins followed close behind. They may not have been 100% up to date with their information on the situation though.

Hermione stopped outside the potions classroom and told everyone to wait there. Something told her that Snape wouldn't acknowledge anything with more people there. After leaving Harry with the others she marched into the classroom.

"Alright! What did you do?" Hermione crossed her arms.

"Huh? Miss Granger what are you going on about?"

"Harry! I'm talking about Harry. You messed with his head. So what did you do to him?" Hermione frowned.

Severus sighed. "Explain further."

Hermione groaned. "You of all people should know altering years of memories over night is a bad idea. Yet you didn't hesitate to do that to Harry right? Just messed him up, for what reason?"

"Miss Granger if you don't start making sense I suggest you leave."

"Harry has been in love with you for years. Then all of a sudden he's mind is so warped that he can't tell one day from the next."

Severus' frown turned into a look of surprise. "For years? Wait you know that Harry loves me?"

Hermione rolled her eyes. "And I know that you kissed him so clearly you like him too. So what did you do?"

Severus sighed and slouched in his chair. "You mean to tell me that his feelings didn't just develop this year?"

Harry stumbled into the classroom followed by the others. He was more focused than he had been in weeks. The pieces in his mind seemed to find where they belonged. The cost was a major headache that caused him to be uneasy on his feet.

"You sealed them." Harry groaned. "My memories and feelings."

"Harry. Don't force it." Severus said urgently.

"I... I know why but..." Harry struggled. "Do you not..."

Severus stood and walked towards Harry. "Please stop forcing it."

Harry fell to his knees. "Why!? Why do you hate me so much?!"

Severus sighed and knelt in front of Harry. "I don't hate you."

He pulled Harry into his arms and whispered something before kissing Harry's forehead. Harry passed out almost instantly. The pained expression on his face also vanished. Severus sighed and picked Harry up as he stood. He looked at the others and gestured for them to follow him as he walked.

"So I guess I owe you all some answers."

"No you owe Harry answers." Hermione huffed.

Severus sighed. "If you know who found out..."

Ron waved his hand. "Yeah yeah we know."

Severus looked at Harry. "My resolve is truly weak."

"Would you like to explain how you feel about him?" Ginny asked.

"How I feel? I was happy. Happier than I should have been when I found out. It scared me completely. I thought if I gave him something he'd be able to move on." Severus shook his head.

"I love you." Harry mumbled. "Moving on was never an option."

Severus jumped a little. "You're awake."

Harry grinned. "I'm a really light sleeper. And there wasn't much for me to remember since I pieced most of it together."

Severus sighed and kissed Harry on the forehead again. He couldn't help it since the truth was out. Besides his love language was small acts of affection and touch. He knew that it could come off as being a bit too clingy which was part of the reason he hid his true self behind cruelty.

Harry smiled at his friends hoping he wouldn't have to voice what he was thinking. He was glad that none of them were jumping to judge them but he also wanted them to leave. He wanted to talk to Severus alone and figure out everything.

"Well." Hermione said. "I got what I wanted. Let's leave them alone for now. Come on."

She pished Ron out and the others followed. Severus sighed and ran his fingers through Harry's hair. This wasn't the ideal outcome he was hoping for. Still his heart was happy things didn't go his way. At least now he would be able to find out if depth of Harry's love and the strength of his resolve.

Harry shifted next to Severus. He was suddenly really nervous. They were alone and all Harry could think of was the last time when Severus messed with his mind. Severus gently brushed Harry's cheek and Harry jumped. Now that his friend weren't there his brave act crumbled to nothing.

"Don't..." Harry said. "Don't mess with my head."

"I wasn't planning to." Severus frowned.

Harry sighed. "Good because everything was a mess. I struggled to get through the day without help."

Severus hung his head. "I'm sorry. I had no idea that your feelings were from years ago."

Harry blusher and scratched his neck. "Well I always admired you. Even though you were harsh you cared. At some point that admiration turned into more."

"So when I locked away your feelings it tangled even together."

"Yep. Severus, even though I was so messed up I still managed to start admiring you again. That's why..."

"You weren't knocked out for long." Severus finished.

Harry smiled and straddled Severus. "Use occlamency on me. I won't force you out or block you."

Severus sighed. "Very well."

After casting the spell the first thing Severus saw was himself. After Harry had recovered from his battle with Voldemort and figured out the truth behind everything. The moment Harry had realized that Severus had been protecting him. The moment Harry had decided that there was more to Severus.

The feelings and images changed as Severus explored more. In Harry's second year when everyone seemed to believe Harry was evil he was relieved that Severus hadn't thought that. In his third year when they were in danger Severus used himself as a shield so that Lupin wouldn't hurt them.

There was admiration and endless gratitude for Severus as his professor. There was also curiosity in the man that was hiding himself behind a tough exterior. There was a growing love mixed in with everything else that was barely noticeable. A love for the small moments where Severus showed bits of his true self.

Then there was 4th year where Harry had very little interaction with Severus. A deep sadness and longing accompanied thoughts of Severus. Moments Harry had to be near Severus were treasured even if Severus' attention wasn't directed at him. This was the start of Harry's realization about his own feelings.

Finally there was 5th year. It was more jumbled than the other memories due to Severus' interference but there was a feeling underlying even the confused memories. Severus was surprised that even though he tried to seal Harry's feelings they were strong enough to push through it.

Harry was breathing heavily trying to keep himself focused. The energy he had to use to keep from pushing Severus out of his mind was a lot. Normally Harry would have resisted by shooting images of his friends to the front of his mind.

"I'm surprised." Severus whispered. "But I'm also glad."

"What surprised you?"

Severus smiled a little. "I thought you were failing because I kept seeing your friends without pushing much."

Harry shrugged. "If I gave you that you wouldn't dig deeper."

"I realized that. I'm also surprised that you even told your friends about your feelings for me." Severus frowned.

"Unrequited love is a problem and I needed to vent."

Severus laughed and pulled Harry closer. He slowly leaned forward and kissed him. Harry slowly kissed him back and wrapped his arms around Severus' neck. Harry pulled away and rested his head against Severus' shoulder. A fear started to creep up on him as he thought about the last time they kissed.

"Are you going to mess with my memories again?"Harry whispered.

"No." Severus said. "My resolve isn't strong enough to deny you again. I just wish this happened after..."

Harry sighed. "I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to hide it from you a little while longer. The risk I put on you is a lot."

Severus shook his head. "You don't understand. Well I need to get back to grading papers. Would you mind..."

Harry didn't like the tone and intention behind Severus' words. He didn't want to push his luck either. Maybe if he had known that would be his last year with his professor things would have been different. Maybe he would have tried a little harder to find out the truth behind Severus' words.

"Professor?"

Harry smiled a little. "My apologies. Your essay sparked an old memory I have. Why did you choose that particular spell?"

"Something you said in class about a professor you knew. It inspired me to further research occlamency."

Harry nodded his head. "It was a great final paper. You just missed a few things in your research. The side effects of casting the spell on both the target and the caster."

"I see. I've never used the spell so I didn't know."

Harry nodded again and smiled. Of course most students wouldn't have used such a spell. He would have never used it if it wasn't for Voldemort. It would have never been used on him either. 10 years had passed since his final year with Severus yet the memory still burned in his mind.

(3200 Words)