Having known the marauders for some time now, you felt it nearly impossible that they could be any more annoying or immature than they already were. However you thought too soon, of course the human epitome of a pain in the arse that is Sirius Black obviously had to prove you wrong even though you hadn't explicitly mentioned your theory to him.

He or one of his friends always managed to form a joke or gag based on whatever they actually retained from classes, which although they all did fairly well on their exams they actually paid attention to pretty much nothing.

It was pretty much just a waiting game now for when one of them would do something or say something stupid to do with the engorgio charm you had learnt last week. It was like a ticking time bomb, the longer they waited surely the worse it would be.

The evening seemed perfectly normal, well as normal as an evening in the Gryffindor common room of Hogwarts could be. You were sat with your fingers laced with those of your girlfriend Marlene McKinnon. Neither of you were overly emotional people, and even though you both knew you loved each other dearly, you didn't need constant reassurance from each other on the matter; being sat in a public place holding hands was a big deal.

Just being there together was enough from you. No words were shared as you both focused on your own books.

Sadly the serenity of your peaceful evening was crushed along with all of your happiness and sanity as thee Sirius Black entered the room, his laughter only halting as he saw the two of you. He brushed his dark hair from his eyes, flashing the both of you a smile.

"Well isn't it the two most attractive Gryffindor's, well you're definitely top five but of course Moony and Prongs are second and third, no one would question that I am first, so that'd make you fourth and fifth... don't tell Lily or James for that matter," he grinned falling onto the sofa between you forcing your hands apart to make room for him to wrap his arms around your shoulders, even though Marlene and yourself were far from impressed by this gesture.

"What do you want Black?" Marlene commented bitterly, slamming her book shut.

"Now Marlene is that anyway to treat your favourite marauder?" He smirked.

"I prefer Remus," she said firmly, expressing no facial emotions.

Sirius winced at the preposterous claim, as though it physically wounded him.

"Ouch McKinnon, you wound me," he frowned. "Anyway I had a question for you two lovely, yet mean ladies."

"Hey! I didn't do anything," you sighed, slightly annoyed to be roped in with Marlene's attitude.

"What do you want?" Marlene repeated in a near hiss.

Sirius cleared his throat as though he was about to make an announcement of the utmost importance.

"Well do you know what one thing I'd never have to use the engorgio charm on?" He smirked.

Surprisingly it was a weak joke, far less than you had expected from him, however it wasn't unlike him really, and his mind did lie generally in the gutter. Your eyes rolled and from the groan escaping your girlfriend's lips you assumed she was equally unamused.

"Your ego?" Marlene questioned confidentially.

"Your stupidity?" You added.

"Your cockiness?"

"Or how irksome you are?" You smiled.

He let out a chuckle at your responses, even though some were low blows, he did appreciate your attempts at humour.

"I expect this from you Marlene, but you've infiltrating the innocence that was once Y/N, I expected better," Sirius stated looking disappointed at you.

"Oh but you did call me mean, so I was just trying to live up to that theory," you smiled innocently.

Sirius stood up narrowing his eyes at the two of you as he backed away slowly.

"Fine, you two win this round, but don't expect it to ever happen again."

Quickly he left heading up the stairs to the male dorm rooms.

"He is such a bloody dick," Marlene huffed moving so she was closer to you to not allow anyone else to sit between you again.

The two of you sat in silence for a moment before a smirk twisted onto her lips as she shifted to look at you seeming almost triumphant with her thought.

"Do you know what one thing I'd never have to use the engorgio charm on?" She grinned.

Of course she would follow in the footsteps of Sirius Black, although he infuriated you and you loved her, they were surprisingly similar.

You gave her a once over quickly to think of a correct answer.

"Your boobs?" You offered as an answer. "They are fucking perfect."

A shocked laugh erupted from her as she leaned forward to press her lips to yours for a moment.

"I was going to say my love for you, but my boobs definitely are rocking."

~*~

Written by Charlotte.