From Albus to Scorpius

Albus: I wish I found some better sounds no one's ever heard.

Scorpius: Don't you like your brother's rap songs on his playlist?

Albus: I wish I had a better voice that sang some better words.

Scorpius: You're not nearly as bad at singing as the rest of your family.

Albus: I wish I found some chords in an order that is new.

Scorpius: You don't play the guitar.

Albus: I wish I didn't have to rhyme every time I sang.

Scorpius: You don't, it's called free verse poetry. Also, you're not singing, Albus, you're texting me.

Albus: I was told when I get older, all my fears would shrink, but now I'm insecure, and I care what people think.

Scorpius: You're Harry Potter's son, you talk about the stress that comes with being a celebrity Child all the time.

Albus: My name's BLURRYFΛCE and I care what you think.

Scorpius: Your name's Albus.

Albus: My name's BLURRYFΛCE and I care what you think.

Scorpius: ..?

Albus: Wish we could turn back time!

Scorpius: No, we can't! That was living death, Albus! Are you crazy?! We almost got expelled! When do you want to go back in time to? To what period in time?

Albus: To the good old days.

Scorpius: the good old days? What do you mean?

Albus: When our momma sang us to sleep, but now we're stressed out.

Scorpius: Your mom's incredibly tone deaf, at least that prevented your eardrums from bleeding.

Albus: Wish we could turn back time to the good old days! When our momma sang us to sleep but now we're stressed out!

Scorpius: What are you stressed out about? Cause I'm not stressed about anything.

Albus: We're stressed out

Scorpius: You actually care about the Quidditch matches?

Albus: Sometimes a certain smell will take me back to when I was young.

Scorpius: What smell? Amortenia? That's just what it does.

Albus: How come I'm never able to identify where it's coming from?

Scorpius: Amortenia.

Albus: I'd make a candle out of it, if I ever found it.

Scorpius: Make a candle out of Amortenia? Geez, you serious?

Albus. Try to sell it, never sell out of it, I'd probably only sell one!

Scorpius: Sell Amortenia? That's probably illegal.

Albus: It'd be to my brother.

Scorpius: You hate your brother! How would he ever buy anything from you?!

Albus: Cause we have the same nose, same clothes, home grown, the stone's throw from a creek we used to roam... but it would remind us of when nothing really mattered.

Scorpius: What creek you used to roam? You live in London, a busy city. And what was the time when nothing really mattered?

Albus: Out of student loans and tree house homes, we all would take the latter!

Scorpius: You have student loans?! What are student loans? Is that when a student loans you a book? Because then I have student loans.

Albus *facewall* AREYOUKIDDINGME?!

Scorpius: What!

Albus: I gave myself away! It's a lyric prank.

Scorpius: Are you serious?

Albus: STUDENT LOANS IS WHEN SOMEONE PAYS OFF THEIR DEBT FROM COLLEGE!

Scorpius: Debt?

Albus: It's a real thing.

Scorpius: College?

Albus: It's a Muggle thing.

Scorpius: That explains why I didn't know what it was earlier. Do I have student loans.

Albus: *facewall*

Albus Potter left this conversation to hit his face against a wall.