Summary:Basically a boyband au where the marauders are big rockstars in 1999.

Tags:Boyband au,canon divergence,out of character,James is a little shit,Lilius needs a hug,Male Lily,Parody of trolls band together

Ships:Sirius x peter(one sided)

Rating:M(Adult language,sexual innuedo,rude humour)

DADA,DADADA

Dumbledore:10 MINUTES TO SHOWTIME,ASSHOLES

James Potter:Alright guys,we're gonna open with 'girl,when i met u in the summer',close with 'girl i'm glad we broke up'. Oh wait no,that doesn't sound smart-ass.OOF,I'VE GOT IT LITTLE SHITS! Open with 'Girl i hate u',close with,'Girl, i want u back'! YES,FUCKERS!!!!We're gonna make boyband history tonight in all of the WIZARDANG WAELD!!!

Peter Pettigrew:510,511,512....

James Potter:THATS DA SPIRIT PETAR PettyGRUEL! THOSE ABS NEEDA BE SWELLIN,FUCKET!

Peter Pettigrew:GYAT*abs are super hot to all girls but the author and her ocs*

James Potter:MERLIN I WANNA EAT THEM ABS

Sirius Black:UH,GAYMI PORTTAR,DO I SIRIUSLY HAVE TO FUCKIN WEAR THIS SHIT!?

James Potter:Yes,Sirachi,they're cauldron-wear! It holds ur shit and pee and makes potions out of it!Now lets see those dance moves,Black ass!

Sirius Black:Ugh fine. Crusty nugget,into juicy wiggle,end on twerking til u poop! YeA

Remus Lupin:Gaymi Portar,u look like an ugly wizard,breathe oxygen u dumb fuck 😃

James Potter:I'M NOT UGLY RAY-MUST LIMPING!!!! ITS THE FIRST SHOW OF THE FUCKING TOUR!!!WE HAVE TO HIT THE PERFECT MUSICAL HARMONY IN ORDER TO WIN THE HOCRUX TROPHY FOR HOGWARTS!!! WE PROMISED DUMBELLDOOR!!!

Remus Lupin:Look,calm down Jamiepuss. Ur making  baby  LA-van nervous. :(

James Potter:Nervous? No,he's not allowed to be nervous. He's gotta be stupid enough to poop in the forbidden forest!

Remus Lupin:Cut him some slack Gaymi,its his first show

Peter Pettigrew:Cum on me abs!

Sirius Black:*edges closer to Peter*

Peter Pettigrew:Don't even think about it Sirachi!

Sirius Black:*Grumbles*

Remus Lupin:Hey,Lilius,how ya feeling?

Lily Evans:I feel like i'm gonna pee,pass out,twerk-

Remus Lupin: And breakdance,followed by da macarena?

Lily Evans:How'd u know? Are u a seer Ray-must?

Remus Lupin:I'm not a seer. U got the pre-show constipation glitter ailness. Completely normal,everyone gets them. U wanna know what i do when i get them?

Lily Evans:Do what i do?

Remus Lupin:No,stupid. I know that when i'm with my friends, there's no perfomance too big and no shit too small.

Lily Evans:But no one's ever hit the perfect musical harmony before. Is it true we can shit out golden snitches?

Remus Lupin:Yes,we can,and the process of the golden snitches coming out of the anal hole hurts real bad,but its worth it.

James Potter:LOOK GUYS,FOLLOW MY LEAD AT ALL TIMES AND BE PERFECT,IF WE'RE NOT PERFECT,I'LL AVADA KERDAVA UR ASSES TO OHIO!!

Severus Snape:10 seconds!

James Potter:Shut up Several-ass!Lets FuCk!!!!

Severus Snape:WITCHES AND WIZARDS,HERE THEY CUM!!!

Severus Snape:THE DISNEY MOUSE!!

Peter Pettigrew:*appears*

Severus Snape:THE BLACK CLIFFORD!

Sirius Black:*does cartwheels*

Severus Snape:THE WINTER WOLF

Remus Lupin:*Stands there cutely*

Severus Snape:THE RED-NOSED STAG

James Potter:WHASSUP BITCHES

Severus Snape:And the idol flower!

Gilderoy Lockhart:Give it up for...the MARAUDERS!!!

All:Well there she goes

Peter:On the floor,lets poop it,no more walking

All:Did anybody notice?

Remus:The energy,just shitted when we dropped that,ooh when we dropped it,mm

Sirius:I have sex but i might,move about to eat ass

James:Coz we might be young,and the music's off,but we gotta move on sight

Lily:The sky was the limit,now the stars where we vibin,
its the ass that we're eating,it'll blow your shit

All:Its so stupid,stupid,stupid,a hundred percent
Pooping together in the world u get

James:Its working! Yes! Come on guys *ruins choreography*

Remus:Its so stupid,stupid,stupid*realises something's wrong*

Remus,James,Lily:Harmony so cold

Sirius:WHATS GAYMI DOIN!? THIS ISN'T MY CHOREO! DEAR MERLIN,HE'S GONE ROGUE

Lily:And,you'll never wanna poop your pants

Remus:Pants....

Peter:Pants....

Sirius:Ants...

Lily:*holds high note*

The perfect musical harmony failed and everyone except Lilius was hanging from the ceiling as the performance stops.

Lily:Gildersoy Popfart, help!

Gilderoy Lockhart:Uh,witches and wizards,please stand by,we're experiencing...uhhh...some stuff?

James:Heyyyyy....at least we didnt break a bone!

James,Remus,Peter,Sirius:*falls from the ceiling*

James:I think i broke my ankle...

James:SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN U DONT FOLLOW MY LEAD AND BE  LITTLE SKANKS

Peter:DUDE WE GOT INTO THIS SHIT COZ WE FOLLOWED YOUR LEAD

James:SO ITS MY FAULT HUH PETAR!!!!! I know we can hit the perfect musical harmony.

Peter:And what if we DONT WANT TO, BITCH!?

Sirius:Yea,we started this coz i was bored! Now everything's for Dumbelldoor. What happened to the Gaymi who didnt care about being a FUCKIN SUCK-UP

James:SHUT UP SIRACHI

Peter:U KNOW WHAT GAYMI?! I'M GETTING THE FUCKITY FUCK OUT OF HERE

Sirius:No shit bro,me too! I'm done with your shit,Gaymi! U can kiss my ass goodbye and go recruit Several-ass and Gildersoy! I'll go find a blonde chick who can kick ass to resign in an anti-death eater resort for the next 20 yrs!

Peter:I'll go join the death eaters and mate with a slytherin and have 1 million kids because u already made my life go DOWNHILL GAYMI WHY NOT!?

James:*heartbroken*FINE! I DON'T NEED U ALL!!! IN FACT,I'LL BETTER OFF WITHOUT FRIENDS LIKE U!! I'M GONNA GO HIKE IN THE FORBIDDEN FOREST ALONE!!!*Runs away in tears*

Peter and Sirius:*doesn't care and walks away*

Remus:Guys,please,why-ugh

Lily:Its my fault,i ruined everything...

Remus:No,Lilius,its not ur fault. We're not in sync. We've gone from boys to men and now there's one direction for us to go. Brolone,solo,yolo.

Lily:But u can't leave Ray-must. Please....

Remus:I'll be back unless i get kidnapped by Bella-Tricks and Lucy-us, but for now i'm gonna start a solo career

Lily:But....what do i do?

Remus:Lilius,ur gonna do the most important thing of all. Ur gonna take care of Dumbelldoor and Mineral-vast!

Dumbledore and Minerva:*playing poker cards*

Lily and Remus:*hug*

Remus:I'll see u soon, Lilius *sniffes*

Lily:Bye...see u later....*sobs*

3 years later,Dumbelldoor and Mineral-vast died and Lilius felt like a failure and was all alone at the age of 3.