flashback

ALICE.

I was in the main room of Austin's and mine shared mansion with Matt, Kellan, and Billy lingering nearby. I was sitting on the couch, staring at my lap while playing with my fingers. Billy was behind me leaning up against the counter in the kitchen, lighting a cigarette. Matt was leaning against the stand our massive flatscreen tv stood upon, a few feet in front of me and to the left against the wall. Kellan was sitting on the coffee table and facing Matt.

"So, Alice," Matt began, a smirk on his face. I made eye contact with him. "Who's dick do you prefer? Austin's not in the same room and I want the truth," he murmured with evil sex appeal dripping from his voice.

I was about to say something but I was interrupted.

"That's enough, Matt," Billy said, inhaling a puff from the cigarette and exhaling.

Matt rolled his eyes. "You're just jealous because you haven't fucked her," Matt said as he smirked at Billy.

Kellan spoke up. "You haven't even fucked her, Matt," Kellan laughed, chewing on the end of a toothpick.

Billy smirked at Matt, tilting his chin up slightly.

"But, theoretically," Matt said, smirking at me. "Who's dick would you want?" He raised an eyebrow.

Billy exhaled another cloud from his cigarette and walked slowly, almost menacingly towards the back of the couch I was sitting on. He placed his hands on the back of the couch and leaned on them, keeping his gaze transfixed on Matt.

"I don't know," I mumbled, barely audible for any of them to hear. If I answered Austin, I knew Matt would beat me, but if I answered Matt, someone would tell Austin and who knows what he'd do to me.

Billy giggled and took another puff from his cigarette.

Matt walked towards Billy. "You act all tough when he's not here, but you fucking know that as soon as he gets back in here, you'll go back to cowering in the corner," Matt snarled.

Billy simply smirked. "Try me," he whispered as he exhaled a cloud in Matt's face.

Matt snatched the cigarette out of Billy's mouth and threw it on the floor and stepped on it.

Billy looked between the now flameless cigarette and Matt's face. "Frightening," he mumbled with a smirk, taking another cigarette out of his pack and lighting it.

"Do you really want me to scare you?" Matt grumbled, staring at Billy threateningly before he walked back to his spot against the tv stand.

"Enough," Kellan demanded. "Stop acting like children."

I stayed quiet as smoke kept forming above my head, the aroma of cigarette smoke taking over my lungs.

"I'm back, boys," Austin greeted as he walked back in the room, arms wide open as if he was expecting a hug. "And my sweet, sweet Alice," Austin cooed as he placed a sloppy kiss on my cheek, causing me to cower back.

Billy raised an eyebrow at Austin and exhaled smoke, his way of greeting Austin. Matt and Kellan simply nodded when Austin walked in the room.

"That was a super fucking long phone call," Austin exclaimed, grabbing the Brandy off the counter and taking a swig. "I hate people, especially when they can't do their fucking job," Austin screamed, causing me to flinch in my seat. "And I especially hate that the buyer doesn't want to see my same guy from last time, because of a fucking harassment problem," Austin grumbled, glaring at nothing in particular.

"What's the plan?" Billy asked, holding the cigarette between his teeth.

"Matt and Kellan, you guys are coming with me," Austin mumbled as he motioned his finger for them to come near him. "I have my guys out there just in case things go to shit, but I want you guys there with me for backup during the deal," Austin said, placing his hands on his hips.

"What about me?" Billy asked, raising an eyebrow.

Matt spoke up. "He doesn't need you, man. He needs tough guys, not pussies," Matt said with a smirk as he crossed his arms over his chest.

Billy raised an eyebrow at Matt as he turned his head to the right. "I'm surprised you even remember what pussy is," Billy said, a look of shock on his face, which then turned into a cocky grin. "Not to mention your fourth grade vocabulary," Billy mumbled.

Matt took a step forward with his fists balled but Austin held him back. "Enough! This is the shit I don't need during the deal," Austin said, causing Billy to shrug. "Billy, your job is to stay here with her," Austin said, motioning towards me. "And watch over her. Make sure nothing bad happens."

Billy raised both of his eyebrows, his lips barely grasping the cigarette

Matt huffed and complained, "Really, Austin? Billy could go and I could stay with Alice." Matt smirked.

Austin shook his head. "No. The plan is set and our jet leaves in an hour," Austin said, walking towards our bedroom. "I'm getting some of my shit now. Feel free to grab whatever you need," Austin called to the two men.

"Grab whatever I need, eh?" Matt murmured darkly as he walked towards me, placing his hand on the back of my neck and slithering it down to my chest.

Suddenly, I felt his hand be pushed away from my breast.

"What the hell?" Matt exclaimed.

"He told me to watch over her," Billy said as he puffed out a cloud. "So I am." He smirked darkly.

Matt balled his fists just as Austin walked back in the room with a suitcase full of whatever he needed.

"Let's go," Austin huffed and walked past the men and to the door. "Our timescale has gotten smaller. Daniels' is pissed. We gotta move now," Austin mumbled, referring to one of his contacts, Tom Daniels.

"Don't we need clothes though?" Kellan asked with a raised eyebrow.

"You can get more when we fucking get there," Austin yelled as he walked out the door.

Kellan and Matt followed Austin out of the house, leaving me alone with Billy.

Billy walked to the front of the couch and sat beside me. I shrunk back in my seat as I cowered away from him.

He leaned in and looked me in the eyes as he mumbled, "I'm not gonna hurt you."

I kept my eyes trained on his for a few moments before I pulled the cigarette out of his mouth softly and put it in my own, taking a deep and long huff. Billy simply smirked back.

"I'm guessing you've smoked before then," Billy murmured, remaining eye contact with me.

I nodded my head and closed my eyes as I inhaled the nicotine-laced vapor. "It's been years," I mumbled.

Billy shook his head and giggled. "Because Austin doesn't let you do shit," he mumbled, more like a statement than a question.

I nodded in response.

"Have you ever been drunk before?" Billy asked, an eyebrow raised.

"My last time was when I was eighteen," I mumbled, causing Billy's face to light up with an evil smirk.

Billy stood up from the couch and moved swiftly around it. It was then that I took in what he was wearing, which I hardly cared about when it came to Austin and his friends. He was wearing a black leather jacket, a red and black checkerboard shirt that was unbuttoned and beneath that a white, almost fishnet shirt, and black skinny jeans. From what I could remember about Billy's clothing in the past, he was always dressed like a rich, emo badass. I hardly ever paid attention to what Austin and his friends wore because it never mattered to me what any of them looked like. They were all monsters, but Billy never did anything to me. He would be in a corner, hiding in the darkness from the situation at hand.

"What are you doing?" I muttered as I watched him move behind the counter and grab the bottle of vodka along with two cans of Coke. He then moved back to sitting next to me on the couch where he had been before.

He smirked darkly at me as he asked, "Are you ready?"

I gulped as I looked between him and the bottle of vodka. "You promised you wouldn't hurt me," I mumbled, afraid of feeling disappointment.

He nodded. "And I promise you I never will," he said with a small smile. He then opened the bottle of vodka and took a massive swig before downing some of his Coke.

He shook his head and made some kind of animalistic noise. "Austin has awful taste in vodka," he groaned, coughing from the flavor.

I breathed out a small laugh as I took a swig from the vodka.

I hummed in agreement as I shook my head, holding the vodka in my mouth. My face contorted into a look of disgust.

Billy turned towards me and held his can of Coke up to my mouth. "Hey, it's ok," he sighed. "Just swallow the vodka and then start chugging this," he instructed.

I shook my head again, my face still contorted in disgust.

Billy nodded his head in response. "You need to swallow it, Alice. It's not gonna get better until you swallow it," he said.

I looked up at the ceiling as I forced the liquid down my throat, my esophagus burning from the vile flavor. I immediately yanked Billy's can out of his hand and chugged half of it.

"Oh my god," I groaned as I set his can on the coffee table.

Billy simply giggled and patted me on the back gently, causing me to flinch at the contact.

"I'm not going to hurt you," he murmured softly, looking me in the eyes.

I offered him a small smile. "I'm just used to being lied to," I mumbled.

He shook his head and sighed. "Alice," he began, prompting me to raise an eyebrow. "Why don't you leave him?"

I sighed and closed my eyes for a while before opening them. "Why don't you?"

Because we're both terrified.
**

Many more shots later, Billy and I were dancing very drunkenly to "The Sharpest Lives" by My Chemical Romance, his phone connected to the sound bar in the room. I never knew much about Billy's music taste, but if we're going off of looks- he definitely fits the alternative rock genre and everything related to it.

"Give me a shot to remember!" Billy yelled, standing across the counter from me.

"And you can take all the pain away from me!" I yelled back, dramatically clutching my chest and bending my knees only for me to move slowly back up.

Billy moved to his right and slammed his back against the refrigerator, yelling as he pointed at me, "Your kiss and I will surrender!"

"The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead," I screamed in synchronization with him.

I turned around and arched my back over the counter as I yelled, "A light to burn all the empires!"

Billy waved his hands in front of his face enthusiastically as he screamed, "So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be!"

I finished his sentence by screaming, "In love with all of these vampires!" I jerked my head towards him.

"So you can leave like the sane, abandon me!" He yelled, dramatically falling to his knees as the guitar riffs and opera voices filled the air.

The song ended after a few more dramatic and frantic moves from Billy and I, the two of us collapsing on the wooden kitchen floor when it was over mere inches from each other. The two of us were lying on our backs and gasping for oxygen, our heads so close together but our bodies in opposite directions; meaning, he was lying facing south on his back while I was facing north.

The two of us continued to gasp for oxygen until we felt like we could breathe steadily. A new song began playing from Billy's playlist, and I recognized it almost immediately.

"I didn't know you listened to Aerosmith," I giggled as I turned my head towards him.

He turned his face to meet mine and our eyes met. "Do I look like I listen to Britney Spears or some shit?" He asked, a quirky grin forming on his face.

I chuckled and turned my gaze to once again fix on the ceiling. "No," I murmured. "You look like you listen to some hardcore shit," I mumbled, giggling a little.

Billy laughed beside me. "Occasionally I listen to Britney Spears," he confessed, causing my gaze to shift to his blue eyes.

I giggled at his confession and he followed, but afterward the two of us sat in silence for a few moments just enjoying each other's company.

Before I could stop myself from asking, the alcohol took over and I asked, "How did you and Austin even become friends?"

Billy sighed and looked back to the ceiling, his eyes closing as he pondered his next words.

"I didn't have that much to look up to when I was growing up," he murmured, almost inaudible. "And Austin knew about it. Hell, everyone knew about it," he sighed. "You remember, don't you?" He asked, raising an eyebrow slightly and looking at me through the corner of his eyes.

I nodded and bit my lip in response. He was referring back to when we were all in high school together. That's how I met Austin- the good Austin, anyway.

He continued on. "After my mom and dad divorced, she became an alcoholic," he mumbled. "I always thought it was because she didn't have any money after he left. You know how my dad came to money, right?"

I shook my head.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes before he carried on. "I blame him for my nicotine addiction, since he's the fucking CEO of Redford's Cigars," he sighed. The company was huge in the cigarette and cigar industry, surpassing Marlboro greatly by the tenth year it had been around. "She thought he would leave her with some money, considering there was no reason for her to have a job because he was fucking loaded," he mumbled. "But he didn't, as anyone would expect from a failed marriage. He took all of his money and went down to Cuba to work full time at the Redford's headquarters instead of working out of one of the buildings they have in New York." He took a short pause before continuing. "She started looking for jobs but all of them were barely above minimum wage. She worked at a gas station after she realized that there was no way in hell of her finding a job that would meet her ungodly standards," he murmured. "She started bringing to work one of those travel coffee cup types of things filled with whiskey and whatever she could get her hands on. While working one day, she met Vinny." He grimaced at the name. "After only a few weeks of dating and hooking up, they eloped because they couldn't afford a wedding, him being a truck driver and her working the morning shift at the gas station," he sighed. "The two were perfect for each other, looking back on it. They were both alcoholics who could barely afford our house and they both hated my dad because he didn't leave them a single penny. But when they found out that dad was loading my credit card every month with too much for me to ever spend," he murmured, gulping before he continued. "They took it out on me," he whispered. "I told them that he had made me sign some fucking contract about how I couldn't tell anyone, specifically my mom, but they didn't care. They," he murmured before taking a shaky breath. "She would watch him as he beat the living hell out of me." He gulped again, his mouth twitching from rage and anxiety. "He," he whispered before continuing. "I was only sixteen," he uttered, tears sliding down his face and onto the floor. "He started to do things to me and she didn't even care," he whispered. "She thought I deserved it for hiding that shit from her. She would leave me at home with him and let him do whatever he wanted to me while she went off and bought whatever she thought they needed, varying from different brands of alcohol to fucking furniture and clothes." His lips trembled as he tried to contain his tears. "I wasn't her son anymore. I was just the money vault," he murmured, wiping away his tears frantically. "Austin and I had a few classes together sophomore year. You were even in some of them," he mumbled with a smile. "He would notice the marks on my body I tried covering up with my mother's discolored makeup on my skin, or my long sleeves when it was ninety degrees outside. I would see him watch me with a depressed look on his face at the way I would waddle into school on certain days, not able to walk from." He paused mid-sentence and gulped. "He took me in. His family took me in. I lived with him for the rest of high school, and I told him everything. My father continued to load my credit card, which Austin and I had gotten back when we snuck into my mom's house one night and found her and Vinny black out drunk on the living room floor," he murmured with a small smile. "We got my credit card back and I wanted to do something right for someone who cared about me, so I started buying the groceries for Austin and his family and I started paying for things when they couldn't afford it anymore. I wanted to do what was right," he sighed. He looked over at me. "And the first day of junior year, he started talking about you," he muttered, no signs of a smile on his face anymore.

"That's when he was different," I mumbled, closing my eyes for a brief moment. "That's when he was gentle."

Billy flashed me a sad smile.

"What happened to him?" I asked, hoping he would know the answer.

"Money," he mumbled. "He got used to the lifestyle I provided for him and he wanted more. I don't think he knew you were more loaded than I was when he started talking to you, but he slowly figured it out. And when he proposed," he sighed, closing his eyes. "And when the two of you got married," he began, opening his eyes to meet mine. "He had all the power he needed."

"I was just a pawn," I mumbled, my gaze shifting to his forehead.

"I guess we both have that in common," Billy mumbled with a small smile.

"Lucky us," I murmured, offering him a small smile.

"Lucky us," he whispered.

Ok I know this is a Sebastian Stan FanFic but I already have so much planned for this and Billy is my favorite character. cHaNgE mY MiNd