A vent i guess??? Its alittle confusing, but i understand it... Idk why i feel anixety just thinking about publishing it.

UgHhhh

All you do is rush me.

What i mean is, all you do is rush me with everything. Like, im trying my best with what i can do.

I can't make friends just like that,

Im not popular,

I can't do everything you do.

All i do is worry about is what other people expect of me.

Am i suppose to be normal?

Does my appearance look off?

Am i doing something wrong?

Tell me and i will fix it.

I will try and make you happy.

Just stop rushing me.

Im not feeling all to well.

All i do is worry about what you want of me.

I try and make friends, join a club,

But that's hard when you have anixety.

Social anxiety to be exact.

No, its not terribly bad.

But it still sucks,

And i try and be better.

I will try and be postive,

And i will try to please people.

I hate that im lonely.

But at the same time i like it...

But it sucks when i see other people hanging out with their friends, and i look at my side and see no one there.

I blink back tears, and try to remain calm.

Crying just makes you look weak...

And im not weak.

I look weak, and everyone always ask me if im alright.

I am. Just not inside...

Deep inside of me, i have that one area were everything is black and i wish it was colorful.

I wish i had someone to make me happy.

All i want is someone to make me feel wanted and loved.

Yes, im loved by my family, and my life is not bad at all.

But all that's missing is a friend.

I want a friend.

I've been slipping lately....

But life goes on i guess.

-hiL