***Taylor’s POV***

                “Taylor, we need to talk.”

                I looked up and over at Ari. He had a blank expression on his face as he peered at me. I got up and wiped my hands on my jeans to get the dirt off.

                “Yea? What’s up Ari?” I asked curiously.

                Ari sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I’m sick of you always being high or drunk,” he said flatly.

                “Ari, come on! You know why!” I said, somewhat angry and somewhat desperately. He knew what happened when I was sober. He knew I needed the substances.

                “You’re killing yourself Taylor, and I hate watching it!” he cried, his eyes begging with me. “Please stop doing all the substances! You’re my best friend and I don’t want to lose you to this shit!”

                I glared at him and shook my head. “Ari, please. You know why I do it. I don’t want It to get me. You’re my best friend Ari. Don’t do this to me,” I begged silently.

                “I won’t watch you kill yourself,” he said furiously.

                Feeling stressed as hell, I dug around and produced a cigarette. I went to put it in my mouth to light it, but Ari smacked it out of my hand and stomped on it several times, crushing it under his worn out Chucks.

                “Stop it Taylor! You don’t need to smoke to keep It away, and you know it!” he cried.

                “Ari, maybe you should try getting high sometime. Maybe then you wouldn’t be so uptight,” I growled.

                “I won’t do that shit. I’m better than that shit. And so are you Taylor. Please just quit it! You can beat It,” he said gently.

                “No I can’t, and you know it. If you were really my best friend, you would understand that,” I said, anger exploding in my voice. The fuck dude? He knew what I saw when I was sober.

                “And if you were my best friend then you would at least try to quit!” he said, the same anger lacing his words together as he spoke them.

                “Get out of here Ari! Just leave me alone!” I yelled furiously and shoved him. The voices. They were slipping through in my head. Telling me to hurt Ari. Ari was trying to hurt me. He was doing this on purpose. Trying to sober me up so that he and It could destroy the last of my sanity.

                “Just hit him Taylor,” one of the voices soothed.

                “Tay-” he started and I brought my fist around to his face. He yelped and stumbled back as his nose began to bleed a little. He looked at me in hurt shock.

                But that shock turned to angrily quickly. He clenched his fists tightly and I roughly shoved him to the ground. He bit his lip and glared at me. “I won’t hit you, no matter what you do to me,” he said simply and pushed himself to his feet.

                “But I won’t sit around and watch my best friend kill himself. Come talk to me when you’ve sobered your sorry ass up Taylor. My best friend is a sober guy. You? You’re pathetic. You’re a waste of space,” he said coldly before walking away.

                “Fuck you Air!” I shrieked after him before pulling out another cigarette and lighting it, already thinking of what I would use to get fucked up tonight.

                That had been the start of it all. That little confrontation. Why had hit him? He had just been trying to help me, and I had hit him.

                And now he was dead.

                I sadly looked at the picture of Ari that I kept wrapped up under my bed. “I’m so sorry Ari. It’s all my fault,” I whispered miserably and squeezed my eyes shut.

                I opened my eyes and gulped. “But I’m going to sober up. I’m going to sober up as much as I can, and ask Emi out. Are you proud of me Ari?”

                I set the picture back under my bed carefully after wrapping it so it wouldn’t get dusty. I laid back on my bed and closed my eyes, allowing sleep to take me away from the pain of knowing my best friend was dead and gone.

                In the morning, I got ready for school and pulled out the picture of Ari again. “See Ari? I’m sober. All day, I’ll be sober. Emi makes It go away,” I said softly. I bit my lip before putting the picture in my backpack. I left for school, sober.

                When I got there, I searched around for Emi. She was over with Gavin and that Craig guy. I walked over and Craig glared at me. I ignored him. He wasn’t going to ruin this day for me.

                “Emi? Can I talk to you alone?” I asked nervously. She gave me a curious look and nodded. She followed me over to a secluded corner in the main lobby of the school.

                “Emi…will you go out with me?” I asked softly.