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✨✨✨

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something, you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try, you'll never know
Just what you're worth
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something, you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face and I
Tears stream down your face
I promise you, I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face and I
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

✨✨✨

Everything hurt. And why was the room moving?
Aeolian came awake slowly, her thoughts jumbled. She remembered the thrust of Oomen's knife, but Kaz had returned for her. They must have made it onto the Ferolind.

"Nin's," she croaked. Her throat felt dry like it was coated in wool.

Nina blurted. "Oh, Saints, you're awake!" And then burst out crying.

Aeolian tried to sit up, but could barely lift her head.

Nina said. "Don't try to move, just rest."

She wiped her tears and offered Aeolian a tin cup full of cold water. She sipped carefully, letting Nina hold her head up.

"How long was I out?" Aeolian finally asked.

"Three days, almost four. Jesper is driving us all crazy." Nina stood up abruptly. "I need to tell Kaz you're awake!"

She grabbed Nina's hand. "Not now."

Nina sat back down, her face puzzled. "Sure."

Nina thought, the first thing the Shu girl would do when she wake was ask for Kaz, but she had been wrong.

"Do we know who came after us at the harbour?" Aeolian asked slowly.

"Pekka Rollins. He hired the Black Tips and the Razorgulls." Nina responded. "And Oomen's dead. Kaz killed him."

"He did?" She looked at Nina.

"Kaz killed a lot of people. Rotty saw him go after the Black Tips who had you up on the crates. I believe his exact words were, 'There was enough blood to paint a barn red.'" Nina explained.

Aeolian closed her eyes, she was always surrounded by death. But this was the closest it had ever come to her in Ketterdam.

"He was afraid for you." Nina looked at her.

"Kaz isn't afraid of anything." She slowly open her emerald eyes.

"You should have seen his face when he brought you to me." Nina said quietly.

Aeolian didn't respond, Nina could tell that she didn't want to talk about Kaz.

She changed the topic. "Tell me why you don't have the Dregs tattoo on your arm?"

Aeolian was quiet for a while. "You saw my tattoos then." Nina nodded. "For me a tattoo need to hold a meaning, I wasn't a Dreg by heart so I didn't want the tattoo on me."

Nina's brows rose. "I didn't think it was optional."

"Technically it isn't. But Kaz said it was my choice, that he wouldn't be the one to mark me." She said.

But he had, in his own way: but despite her best intentions. Feeling anything for Kaz Brekker was the worst kind of foolishness. Aeolian knew that.

When she first settled in Ketterdam, and was searching for blades, since she lost her Grisha knives back in Ravka. Kaz was the one, who helped her in acquiring new blades, it took a week to acquire the set of blades she wanted, but when it was done. She told him, "maybe I'll use one you."

He'd sighed. "You're the only one, who can kill me in a way that matters." She hadn't been able to tell if he was kidding.

Now she shifted slightly on the table. There was pain, but it wasn't too bad. Given how deep the knife had gone, it was a miracle she was alive. And she was thankful for the grace of the divine power from above that had guided Nina's hand to save her.

Nina leaned back on her chair, it was complex what Kaz and Aeolian have because Kaz was always Kaz. And Aeolian on the other hand was always playing around with everyone, and with Raske in the picture she couldn't really tell, if the Shu girl did feel for Raske or Kaz or someone else.

Nina asked cautiously. "Doll, you're the granddaughter of the Empress aren't you?"

"Yes," Aeolian responded. "But I failed her, and there's no place for failures in Shu Han."

"But you're the princess." Nina looked at her.

She took a deep breath. "I cannot go back, because not only did I fail the most important mission of my life...but back in Ravka, I killed a Grisha inside the chapel, to save Kaz's life. And after that night, everything changed for me."

Aeolian did try to erase the fact that she killed a Grisha inside a holy place but that kind of sin, couldn't be wiped off, just like that. She was religious and she had followed the teachings of saving Grisha for a long time, until back in Os Alta, when an Inferni tried to harm Kaz inside the chapel and her instinct kicked in.

Not only did she take the life of a Grisha that day, but she had polluted a holy place. Till this day whenever she recalls that incident, it terrifies her. But she took comfort in the fact that, she saved Kaz's life back then. Because everyday after that, he was the one who had seen her potential. He'd bet on her, and that meant something, even if he'd done it for his own selfish reasons.

He'd given her a place besides him in the Dregs, even though he had always been in control, he didn't try to control her.

"Don't you think 'the ghost', makes me sound like a corpse." She said.

"A phantom," he corrected.

"For once in my life, I want to use a name...that I choose." She muttered.

Because she was called 'the jackal' in The Onyx, and 'black blade' in The Desert Blade. And now 'the ghost' in the Dregs, it was going out of hand.

"I know you want an alluring name like, the moon princess or beauty queen." He squinted. "But I want your enemies to be afraid of you, not fall in love."

She pressed her lips, she didn't want to name herself 'the moon princess' or 'Beauty Queen' but she got what Kaz was trying to say here, she needed to have a dangerous name.

"I'm new to Ketterdam," she crossed her arms. "I don't have the luxury of enemies, yet. Dirtyhands."

"Our enemies," he huffed.

"If that's the case," a sly smirk passed her face. "We should be lovers instead."

"If you keep talking like that, you might make a fool fall in love," he said quietly.

"Let's pray the fool isn't you, Kaz Brekker." She smirked wider. He frowned a bit and got back with his paperwork, and didn't even lift up his head when she left the room. Aeolian sighed. She didn't want to think about Kaz anymore.

Nina started at the Shu girl for a while, then said. "So you'll never go back?"

She pressed her lips. "I cannot go back."

Aeolian did miss her homeland, it was the most beautiful place in the world. But she knew that she couldn't go back even if she wanted to, she had left her old life and she should accept this new one now, even though she never planned her life to turn out this way. Nina looked at her, and she knew that Aeolian did miss her homeland like she misses Ravka but life had been cruel for them both.

"Can you hold my hand," she spoke softly. "Until I fall asleep."

Nina nodded with a smile, "I'd love to doll." And as Nina grab hold of her hand, she closed her eyes and after a very long time, she dreamt of home.

➖➖➖➖➖

Jesper felt about ready to hurl himself overboard just for a change in routine. He was secretly hoping they'd be attacked by pirates, so that at least he'd have something to do. And with the knowledge that Aeolian was still not awake, didn't help either. He checked on her every two or three hours, Wylan and Raske did the same. He knew that Wylan was badly affected by her condition, the night she got stabbed, he heard him sobbing all by himself at a corner away from sight. The idea that the ambush on the docks might simply be the end of her had shaken him as well. Despite Nina's efforts, he'd been fairly sure Aeolian wasn't long for this world.

As usual Jesper went down to check Aeolian, and he couldn't belief his eyes when he saw the Shu girl seated up, and Nina putting her shoes.

"Darling!" Jesper crowd. "Bless my eyes!"

She smiled faintly. "It's nice to see you too, Jes."

Nina spoke to Aeolian, like a mother to a child. "If you don't promise to take it easy, I'll slow your heart and keep you in a coma until I can be sure you've recovered fully."

Jesper thought Aeolian would laugh, or say something mischievous but instead. She cupped Nina's face and said, "Thank you for keeping me in this world when fate seemed determined to drag me to the next. I owe you a life debt."

Nina blushed. "When we're back in Ketterdam, take me out for waffles."

Aeolian chuckled. "Dessert for a life? Count me in."

She gripped the arm that Jesper offered, and they made their way up to the deck. He steered her towards the rail.

"It feels good to be this kind of cold," she murmured. "The cold of the living."

Wylan and Raske were at the stern with the crew, but as soon as they saw Aeolian, they headed quickly towards them. Wylan hugged her for the longest time, it eased his heart knowing that she was well and alive, the past few days had been horrifying for him. More horrifying then when he came to know that his own father planned to kill him. Raske caressed her cheek, and went back to the stern.

Jesper couldn't really tell the relationship between Raske and the Shu girl, but there was something going on between the two that the rest of the Dregs didn't know about. Every crew member called greetings and well wishes, one after the other. Except for Specth, Kaz and Anika who were standing besides the wheel.

Aeolian refused to look up for some reason, but when Jesper did he saw Anika conversing with Specth. And Kaz peering down on them but when Jesper gave him a cherry wave, Kaz expression didn't change.

"Would it kill Kaz to smile every once in a while?" Jesper asked.

"Very possibly." Aeolian replied.

When Matthias emerged on deck, he had to head straight for the railing. All of these canal rats had easily found their sea legs, used to hopping from boat to boat on the waterways of Ketterdam. Only Wylan and he seemed to be struggling.

But for some reason Wylan looked cherry, then he caught sight of the pulchritudinous Shu girl, standing besides Jesper. When she was stabbed, their world turned upside down and he saw why people called Kaz Brekker, Dirtyhands, he was ruthless and unforgiving. That night something savage flashed in his eyes. And Matthias' knew that Brekker would drag the girl back from the afterlife himself if he had to. He wouldn't let the girl go, he'll never let her go. It frightened Matthias, because the girl hadn't realised that she wouldn't be able to get rid of Kaz Brekker, even if she wanted to.

Matthias moved forward and gave her an awkward bow, "I understand you're the reason we made it out of the harbour alive."

"I suspect there were a lot of reasons," said Aeolian.

"I'm a reason," Jesper offered helpfully.

"All the same," said Matthias, ignoring him. "Thank you, Lin." As he walked away.

"They're glad you're alive. I'm glad." Jesper said softly.  

"Thanks." She smiled at him. They walked towards the foredeck, and she leaned on the railings. "Did he come to see me at all?"

Jesper knew she meant Kaz. "Every day. I don't think he likes sickbeds...I mean, I think it was hard for him to be around you that way."

Aeolian didn't respond, she was gazing at the horizon. She was thankful that Kaz had saved her back in the harbour, but he was the one who told her, he needed her skills and not her. And even though she wanted to believe that he had saved her because she meant something to him, in the back of her mind, there was the bitter truth that he needed her for the job.

This was a six person job, and Kaz needed her to scale an incinerator shaft. Six storey high, that none of them could scale without the help of a rope. If she was any other member of the Dregs, and he didn't need her, he wouldn't have come for her. Kaz Brekker, never does something for nothing. He bust Matthias out of Hellgate only because his freedom meant something to Kaz, not because he wanted to help Nina or Matthias. She had sticked long enough with Kaz to know his selfish intentions. So, she didn't have to raise her hopes up because it'll only crash at the end of the day.

He continued. "That first day when you were hurt...he went a little crazy. Kaz wouldn't have gone off on that kind of a mad-dog tear if it had been any of us with a knife stuck in our sides."

"Of course he did," she squinted. "Because if I die, the plan falls apart."

Jesper didn't argue. He couldn't pretend to understand Kaz or what drove him. But what he witnessed that night, was different, but he had no proof. And Aeolian didn't seemed to be interested in talking about Kaz at all.

So he asked her something else. "You know the real reason why Wylan left home?"

"There were rumours Wy had been caught in a sweaty romp with one of his tutors." She said, "but this information doesn't add up. And he doesn't want to talk about his past life."

"Hidden depths indeed." He mumbled.

"It's your turn, Jes. You know how risky this job is, I know you love a challenge, but this is a stretch, even for you." She turned to him.

"I'm in debt, it's bad this time. I borrowed money from the wrong people. And my father's farm is in danger." He told her.

"Saints! Jes, you didn't." She looked at him in disbelief, he held his head low. "I know."

Jesper glanced back at the wheel. Kaz hadn't moved. He was still watching them, his eyes hard, his face as unreadable as ever

"Kaz is...I don't know, he's like nobody else I've ever known. He surprises me." He said. "You're too good for him, you know."

A sly smirk passed her face. "So are you."

Anika was conversing with Specth but she could see Kaz watching Jesper and Aeolian. She didn't understand why he didn't go down and greet her, like the others did. But trying to understand Kaz Brekker is like trying to solve a crossword and realising there's no right answer. She didn't like Aeolian, but she was thankful for her, because if it wasn't for her, they'll all be dead by now. That night when the cross fire happened, from afar she saw Kaz attacking The Black Tips that had rounded Aeolian up the crates, she thought she had seen death but not like that.

It was a sight to see him running across the harbour in a crossfire without his cane, cradling the lifeless body of the Shu girl. And for the very first time in her life, Anika felt pity to see Aeolian like that. Whatever it maybe, she didn't want Aeolian dead. She witnessed what Kaz did to Oomen and he was wrathful, it wasn't the monstrous side of Dirtyhands but something more, burning with fury and rage.

Four long days, when she was in a coma, he had been unfocused and more irritable than ever. But seeing her here today, alive and well. Anika, thought he'd be the first one to limp down the stairs and welcome her back to the world of the living. But instead Kaz seemed more distant than he had ever been, and even though she knew the truth, she was stupid enough to still feel something for the Bastard of the Barrel. Someone who'd never love her back.

➖➖➖➖➖

It took two days after she emerged from the surgeon's cabin for Kaz to make himself approach Aeolian. She was sitting by herself, sipping a cup of dark coffee. He had seen her with the others, but she refused to look at him, for reasons unknown but he felt the sting in his heart. He never thought someone ignoring him, would be this heavy for him. And even though he had been conflicted with his own feelings and had been fuming over the fact; that Raske donated his blood to her. He couldn't be apart from her any longer.

Because the mess that had happened, happened because of him. And she nearly died because she was associated with him. Kaz limped over to her and awkwardly lowered himself down beside her and set aside his cane. He could smell the ylang-ylang on her, it had been long, since he hadn't smelt the scent on her. It was the most comforting scent.

"Is your leg bad?" She finally spoke, she was waiting for him to approach her all these time but Kaz seemed distant. It took two long days, but he finally did and she knew it took something from him to come forward.

"It's fine," he responded. He missed her voice, her presence, he missed her.

She turned to him, her eyes glimmering in the sunlight. "What business?"

"We need to re-examine the plans of the Ice Court," he told her. But the real reason was he'd been looking for an excuse to talk to her for two days.

She sipped her coffee and nodded, "let's call the others then."

Kaz informed Wylan to call the others, and within a minute everyone had gathered. They were away from the eyes and ears of the crew.

Matthias saw Kaz seated beside Aeolian, Brekker had lost the thrum of violence that seemed to drive him. The girl was breathing, alive and seated besides him. He was calm once again. Matthias eyes landed on the cursed walking stick. He liked to imagine breaking it into splinters and feeding them to Brekker one by one.

Aeolian pulled out a tiny, clear disk that winked in the sun. "One of Raske's new inventions." She handed the disks around.

Wylan looked at her. "What is it?"

Even though Kaz didn't like or trust Raske, he knew the talents the boy possessed. He pushed his deep into his mouth, wiggling it between his teeth. "Baleen, if we run into trouble on the open sea and you can't come up for air, wiggle it free and bite down. It will buy you ten minutes of breathing time. Less if you panic."

Then he tapped the Ice Court plans with his gloved hands. "Why aren't there names on anything? Names, Helvar. All of them."

Reluctantly, Matthias picked up the pen and ink and began to scratch in the names of the buildings and surrounding roads. Part of him wondered if he could simply find a way to separate from the group once they got there, reveal their location, and thereby win his way back into the good graces of his government.

"You're holding back," Kaz said, his dark eyes trained on Matthias.

Matthias ignored the shiver that passed through him. Sometimes it was like the demon could read minds. "I'm telling you what I know. Your plan won't work. The prison is totally sealed off from the other two sectors. Once you're in, you're in."

"There's always a way out." Kaz pulled the prison plan from the stack. "Five floors. Processing area, and four levels of cells. So what's in the basement?"

"A laundry and the incinerator." Matthias replied. "Where they burn the convicts' clothes." As soon as the words left Matthias mouth he understood what Brekker had in mind. "Sweet Djel! You want us to climb six storeys up an incinerator shaft?"

Djel was the Fjerdan god of life.

"He doesn't mean for us to climb it," said Nina bitterly, as she realised Aeolian was the one who was going to do the climb for them.

"Can you do it?" Kaz turned to Aeolian, he knew she could do it. But if she didn't want to, he'll have to find another option for them.

"Why ask, when you're planning to send her climbing up six storeys of chimney." Nina looked at Kaz angrily. "Because you will never give up the haul."

"I can do it, Nin's." Aeolian said.

"You don't have to do it because Brekker, says so." Nina exasperated.

"You know I can," she looked at Nina.

Nina threw up a hand in frustration, as she rose up and left.

Jesper spoke softly. "Why are we talking about scaling chimneys when we've got a bigger problem, if Pekka Rollins is after Bo Yul-Bayur. He probably has a head start."

"Pekka Rollins is a Barrel boss," Kaz said. "No more, no less. We pull off this job and divvy up that haul, we'll be the legends of the Barrel. We'll be the crew that beat Pekka Rollins."

Matthias felt sure that Kaz Brekker hated Pekka Rollins, and it wasn't just because he'd blown up their ship and hired thugs to shoot at them. This had the feel of old wounds and bad blood.

Jesper cast his eyes heavenward. "Fine. But if Pekka Rollins kills us all, I'm going to get Wylan's ghost to teach my ghost how to play the flute just so that I can annoy the hell out of your ghost."

Kaz lips quirked. "I'll just hire Matthias ghost to kick your ghost's ass."

"My ghost won't associate with your ghost," Matthias said primly, and then wondered if the sea air was rotting his brain.

Aeolian, just chuckled to herself and began to sketch the ghosts of the four dummies around her.

➖➖➖➖➖

"Can you do it?" Kaz asked her again, because he was scared for her.

"You know I can do it, Kaz," Aeolian said. "So why ask, again?"

"My precious spider if you fail, we'll all end up stuck inside a Fjerdan prison." He said but in the back of his mind, there was fear and reluctance for the very first time.

"And I'll end up dead." She looked at him, "my ghost will come for you, for leading me to my death." She was jittery.

Kaz had missed this side of hers. "Haunt me then! Be with me always, take any form."

"What if I drive you mad?" A light smirk passed her beautiful face.

"You do it every single day," he said slowly.

"It's my passion," she leaned her head back against the hull.

She had been angry with Kaz for the longest time, then he approached her at noon and after the meeting with the crew. They were both back in their same old routine. Just being themselves, playing and annoying each other.

"Do you trust Specht?" She asked. "I don't like that there's only one way out. If the Ferolind isn't waiting for us in the harbour..."

Kaz settled back against the hull, too. "I trust him enough...and your crush is going to be at the Ferolind with him, so I'm sure he'll be able to keep an eye on Specht."

Kaz brought Raske in this journey because he knew that the boy, wouldn't leave Aeolian stranded in Djerholm. If any of the crew gets cold feet and decides to flee, Raske would be the one to stop them.

Specht on the other hand used to be a navy but they threw him out for insubordination, and refused him his pension. He has a sister to support near Belendt, and Kaz got him his money. Because the man knew the navy's routes like the back of his hand.

"So Raske is only here to guard the Ferolind. Never something for nothing, Kaz," she said, her gaze steady. "Still, if the Ferolind is intercepted, we'll have no way out of Djerholm."

"I'll get us out. You know that." He tuned to her.

Tell me you know that. He needed her to say it. He'd snapped at her before they'd left Ketterdam, told her he'd get a new spider for the job if she didn't think he could pull it off. He needed to know that she believed he could do this. He needed to know she believed in him. Like he believes in her.

But all she said was, "I hear Pekka Rollins was the one gunning for us in the harbour."

Kaz felt a surge of disappointment. "So?"

"Don't think I haven't noticed the way you go after him, Kazuki." She said slowly.

There was a long silence between them and he wasn't sure why he said it. He'd never told anyone. "Pekka Rollins killed my brother."

He didn't have to see her face to sense her shock. "You had a brother?"

"I had a lot of things," he muttered.

Had he wanted her sympathy? Was that why he'd told her? Or something more?

"Kaz_" She hesitated.

What would she do now? Try to lay a comforting hand on his arm? This was a first.

"I'm sorry." She said slowly, "I'll pray for him, for peace in the next world if not in this one."

Kaz Brekker, had someone he loved and cared for and Pekka Rollins took that away from him. She felt a sudden pang of sadness for him.

They were sitting close together, their shoulders nearly touching. Her elegant green eyes looking like gems, half of her hair tied up to look like a bow. Kaz didn't pay much attention to hairstyles until her, she always did something different with her hair. She had mentioned a dozen different type of braids she does, and when she rambles about it and do her hair, he finds himself quite entertained watching her do her thing. He brushed off his thoughts. Even the idea of being this near someone should have set his skin crawling. Instead he thought, What happens if I move closer?

"I don't want your prayers," he said.

"What do you want, then?" She asked and he could hear the change of tune in her voice.

The old answers came easily to mind. Money. Vengeance. Jordie's voice in my head silenced forever. But a different reply roared to life inside him, loud, insistent, and unwelcome. You!

He shrugged and turned away. "To die buried under the weight of my own gold."

She sighed. "Then I'll pray you get all you ask for."

"More prayers," he said. "Save your prayers for good weather and stupid guards. Just leave me out of it." Then he asked. "And what do you want, Lin?"

But he didn't hear her reply, only sensed her absence. She had slipped away, like always.

Kaz limped to the bow, annoyed with himself and angry with her. Why had he sought her out? He'd been irritable and unfocused for days. He wished he hadn't said anything about his brother. Even those few words raised the memories, clamouring for attention. After their father died, Jordie had sold the farm and moved to Ketterdam with Kaz.

The disaster began with a wind-up dog. Filip was the boy who sold the mechanical dogs and the man he knew was Jakob Hertzoon, a minor mercher who owned a small coffeehouse near the Exchange. The next week was like a happy dream. Jordie and Filip worked for Mister Hertzoon as runners. While they were working, Kaz was allowed to stay at the coffeehouse and practise his magic tricks. The man in the counter gave him all the hot chocolate he could drink. They were invited to the Hertzoon home for dinner, his wife, Margit, fed Kaz hutspot made with smoked sausage, and he'd played with their daughter, Saskia. She was ten years old, and Kaz thought she was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. It was the best Kaz Riveted had felt since his father died.

Kaz would always remember that moment Jordie invested the money they had from the sale of their father's farm, to Mister Hertzoon. When he'd seen greed take hold of his brother, an invisible hand guiding him onward, the lever at work.  Because of his age, Jordie would loan Mister Hertzoon the money, and Mister Hertzoon would place the trade. They all walked to the bank that held the funds from the sale of the farm and Jordie signed them over.

Mister Hertzoon then hugged them at the door. He handed the loan agreement to Jordie and warned him to keep it safe. "The deal is the deal," they shook hands like proper merchants. When the week was over, they'd walked hand in hand to the coffeehouse. It was empty. That night, Kaz took Saskia's red ribbon and clutched it in his palm. He lay in bed and tried to pray, but all he could think about was the magician's coin: there and then gone.

➖➖➖➖➖

They got their first glimpse of the northern coast. Matthias hadn't anticipated how difficult it would be to see his homeland for the first time in so long. Aeolian stood besides Raske and admired the sight, she had missed the snow. The three figures were at the railing, having their coffee. Matthias was impressed by Aeolian's resilience. Though she still had circles beneath her eyes, she was graceful and poised as always, smelling like ylang-ylang and her hair braided in two perfect French braids. She hid her pain well.

Nina appeared and told Matthias. "Kaz wants me to tailor you."

"What does Brekker want you to do to me?" Matthias expression changed.

"Nothing radical. I'll change your eye colour, your hair. It won't be permanent." Nina said.

"I don't want this. I don't want you near me," He turned to Nina.

"That's not the way to talk to a lady," Raske told Matthias.

A sly smirk passed Aeolian's face. "You should be honoured Hercules, that a stunning heartrender wants to tailor you."

Nina liked the compliments coming from Aeolian, she turned to Matthias. "It won't take long, but if you want to argue about it with Kaz ..."

"Fine," he said, steeling himself.

It was pointless to argue with the demjin. And he didn't want to piss Kaz off by saying no, he could sense the negative energy around Brekker for the past few days. And Aeolian seemed to be the one behind it, because after their previous meeting of the Ice Court, it was like everything went back to square one as the distance between Kaz and Aeolian seemed to grow.

Aeolian leaned on Raske as they watched Nina tailor Matthias, the Fjerdan assumed, maybe because of Raske that Kaz and Aeolian were having a problem. But he couldn't really tell, they were all very complicated and he didn't understand human relationships because in Fjerda, things were simple.

"You don't smell like roses any more," he suddenly said to Nina, then wanted to kick himself. He shouldn't be noticing her scent.

A smirk passed Nina's face and he wanted to wipe it off immediately, so he told her. "Lin smells like ylang-ylang, I just have a sharp nose."

"Kaz said to pack what we needed for the journey. Unlike our precious doll, I like to eat." She reached into her pocket and popped a toffee in her mouth.

It was a humiliating epiphany, but he could have watched her eat all day. This was one of the things he'd liked best about Nina, she savoured everything. Her lips were bare inches from his. If he sat up straighter, they'd be kissing.

"We'll have to do this at least two more times, so I can deepen the colour of your hair and your eyes." Nina took a step back, picked up her case and left.

Aeolian strolled around the deck, it wasn't much but to stretch her legs and take the fresh breeze in. She felt sorry for Kaz, he had lost a brother and he had admitted, that he had a lot of things. But he had also showed her that, he didn't need her sympathy or her prayers. In short, he didn't need her. The only reason he needed her, was for the job.

When she called him 'Kazuki' meaning 'hope of peace' in Shu. He had laughed and said. "I don't know if peace exists in the Barrel, but you'll find none of it with me."

"Better terrible truths than kind lies." She had said.

Because Kaz had been honest with her, the truth was bitter. But that's what it was, he had clearly told her, that there's no peace or comfort with him and if she can't still see that, she was just being dumb.