Letting the warm water run down his face, Yoongi squeezes his eyes shut, parting his lips just enough to exhale.

He thought- he'd hoped... Well, he isn't even sure what he hoped would come from walking in the door and dragging Taehyung into bed like he did.

Clarity? Confirmation? An epiphany maybe?

That's idiotic– and pathetic– if that's what his still mildly inebriated mind was grasping for.

He shouldn't need to fuck his fiancé in order to clear his mind of another man.

A man who just an hour ago Yoongi allowed himself to get drunkenly lost in and surrender to the muddled emotions– the memories– that had come rushing back.

God, he is such an idiot! If he keeps going on like this he is going to ruin every plan he and Taehyung have made for their future.

Yoongi felt like he was in the middle of some sort of drama. An unrealistically complicated and exaggerated one.

Like that American show Jin has become obsessed with where all the doctors have petty fights and sleep together, extraordinary medical miracles mixed in with all the romantic drama.

Yoongi recalls an episode that largely went by without any particular attention paid on his part that now seems all too relevant.

"Pick me. Choose me. Love me" one doctor had begged another and fuck if that isn't pretty damn close to how his conversation with Jungkook went.

He gulps as he tries to clear his airway of the emotional lump forming there.

Rolling his neck tiredly and raising his hand to brace his palm against the cold tile wall in front of him, he replays his conversation with Taehyung.

He thinks about the questions that were asked, the answers that were given, and the dagger of guilt driven deeper into his heart inch by inch with every word.

"I'm not going to pressure you, but I'm here for you whenever you are ready to talk. Whether it's tonight, tomorrow, a week, even a month from now. I'll be here." Taehyung had whispered so sweetly as Yoongi rested his cheeks against his naked chest.

He had been combing his fingers soothingly through Yoongi's hair, letting his blunt nails scratch his scalp lightly, allowing the genuine love and care he felt for Yoongi radiate from his core.

Yoongi could feel the words physically wrap him in a warm embrace.

Yoongi had gulped at the weight, feeling like he was ready to vomit.

Instead of expelling the contents of his stomach though, he– to his own dismay– started to share.

He began by telling Taehyung about how Jungkook made them both a meal they used to eat together.

How their conversation started out simple enough; Jungkook asking nothing more complex than what Yoongi had done that day.

Yoongi shared with Taehyung that his answer was equally as simple; telling him about his job before he'd asked Jungkook how his own job was going.

He explained how the air around them got noticeably heavier after that when he received the robotic, obviously disingenuous answer from Jungkook that everything was fine.

Taehyung laid beside him silently, continuing to card his fingers through Yoongi's hair as the older shared that it took a little coaxing before Jungkook allowed himself to be honest and confess how hard it has been for him to adjust.

How it is a bit easier now than it was at the very beginning, but he still feels like he's barely keeping his head above water most days.

He told Taehyung how Jungkook shared that he feels like everyone is constantly disappointed that he isn't as good as Yonjun was.

That this isn't all coming naturally to him like it seemed to come to his brother.

That he even feels like some people are just waiting for him to fail so they can turn around and mock Mr. Kang for putting so much faith in him.

"It's so much, hyung. So much that I was thrown into all at once and was just expected to figure out. I feel like I'm expected to mold myself to fit into the hole Jun left and it's- that's just not possible!

"I'll never be as good as him. I'll never be him! But no one will accept that we're different people. That despite sharing the same DNA, I am my own person and he was his. I'll just... I'll never be him..." Jungkook cried against Yoongi's shoulder after they'd first moved from the table to the couch.

Taehyung had asked some questions after that, inquiries that mostly consisted of if there was anything he could do to help Jungkook as far as work went.

Yoongi wasn't surprised his fiancé had jumped to wanting to help Jungkook however he could. Taehyung built his life on helping people.

Although Taehyung and Jungkook are in drastically different lines of business, Taehyung does know what it's like to be underestimated and feel like you have things to prove.

Yoongi realized that point immediately, but the thought was quickly dismissed.

Taehyung could likely offer support to Jungkook in a professional sense, but the thought of the two spending time together, bonding in such a way, honestly scares Yoongi.

Because of that fear, Yoongi selfishly shot the idea down.

He told Taehyung that he didn't know what he could do.

(This wasn't necessarily untrue, it just wasn't the whole truth either.)

That Jungkook moreso just needed someone to talk about his feelings, worries and struggles to that he trusted, and that was Yoongi.

Taehyung didn't push the subject further, accepting Yoongi's answer easily.

Taehyung instead followed up by asking if Jimin had known about any of this, him knowing a fair amount of detail about the friendship between Jungkook and Jimin from what Yoongi has shared about the past complications between the three of them.

That question Yoongi was able to answer honestly, telling him that Jungkook hadn't spoken to Jimin as openly as he did with Yoongi as far as Yoongi had understood.

But, besides telling Taehyung about Jungkook's struggles with work– as well as touching on his heartbroken realization that he was out of Jungkook's life, leaving him to suffer with no one to turn to far longer than he should have– he hadn't gone into detail about anything else.

Not about what was confessed and requested during their talk on the couch, the change in atmosphere that happened when he and Jungkook sat back at the table to finish their meal that had been interrupted or about the happenings after he accepted that first glass of whiskey that was offered to him.

But, if he's stretching for an excuse as to why he didn't have to scramble for a diversion to steer away from talking on any of that, it could be blamed on the fact that Taehyung hadn't asked.

Yoongi knew Taehyung tasted the liquor on his tongue. He'd pointed it out directly now that he's thinking about it.

He'd even smelt it on his breath before they'd kissed but he didn't really make a fuss about it.

After Yoongi confirmed that he hadn't driven himself back, the topic was dropped.

Taehyung didn't ask if Yoongi and Jungkook both got drunk; if Jungkook drove him home or about him drinking enough to become as tipsy as he was in general.

Yoongi chalks that up to Taehyung knowing him thoroughly enough to be well practiced in gauging when to push Yoongi to sharing and when it's better to let him take his time.

But, that just makes Yoongi feel worse.

"It's different... this is different..." he mumbles before turning around and tilting his head back to let the water cascade through his hair.

Withholding information is different than lying. This has always been his reasoning.

And when the whole truth will do nothing but hurt, why is it so bad to leave the painful bits out?

Yoongi isn't even sure how to go about explaining the whole truth anyway.

How to soften the blow that will come with the details of how things got out of hand.

As he begins to lather the shampoo in his hair he continues to mentally reach and claw for reasons that can justify his talk with Taehyung, but it isn't as easy this time as it was the last time they spoke regarding Jungkook.

It's gotten more complicated.

"I just want a chance" he hears Jungkook's voice ring clear again.

The words ricochet around his mind– around the columns of his heart– and he can't ignore or deny them.

If Jungkook's declaration that night that he loved Yoongi and wasn't about to let him just up and marry someone else didn't fuck with his mind enough, this statement surely did.

These words... they added to the complicated web that's begun to weave.

It's a web that is already shaping up to intricate as well as delicate.

"Just a chance."

How can such a seemingly simple request cause such a thunderstorm of confusion?

It really does seem reasonable, the timing is just... awful.

.......

When Yoongi comes out of their bathroom dressed in his soft pajama set he'd been gifted from Jin and his towel dried hair, he's a little surprised to see the dimly lit room empty.

The surprise turns into guilt within seconds though because it is then that the door is opened slowly and Taehyung pokes his head in hesitantly.

The first thing Yoongi notices is his slightly damp looking hair, which means he must have used the guest bathroom while Yoongi took his own longer than usual shower.

Taehyung jumps when his eyes that had been scanning the room after he had seen the bed was empty land on where Yoongi is stood.

"Oh, you're done," he chuckles quietly with a sheepish smile as he opens the door wider to slip into the room.

"Have a nice shower, love?" He smiles as he walks to Yoongi.

Yoongi nods in response.

"You?" He asks before closing his mouth, not daring to open it again for fear that he will yield to the caring tone in which Taehyung is speaking and begin sharing again.

"That's good. And yes, I did as well," Taehyung smiles before trailing his eyes down Yoongi's body. "I see you have your Jin Jammies on." He grins as he looks back up to meet Yoongi's eyes. "They are so fitting for you, doll. So mischievous and secretive you are. So devilish, just like those little guys."

Yoongi heart sputters as he takes in the teasing smirk gracing Taehyung's lips.

He looks down at his outfit with widened eyes as he realizes what little cartoons are scattered across his pants and top.

He picked these to wear to bed because they are soft and comfortable.

He was too busy thinking about everything else to pay attention to the pattern.

Devils. How ironic.

Taehyung is- wait... Yoongi looks up, tilting his head in question.

"What do you mean 'secretive?'" He asks in a miraculously even tone.

"I don't mean it to be offensive," Taehyung giggles lightly, taking Yoongi's hand gently in his as he leads them to their bed. "We can all be a bit mischievous at times and everyone has at least one secret."

When he doesn't follow up with anything beyond that answer Yoongi debates whether to ask him to elaborate, but Taehyung speaks again as he flicks the lamp on the beside table off and crawls under the covers, pulling Yoongi down gently next to him.

"I just spoke with Jungkook," he informs with a yawn like it's the most casual thing in the world and not something that makes Yoongi's heart palpitate.

"O-oh?" Yoongi mutters, head resting on the pillow now.

"Yeah. I asked if Soobin might be able to come pick up your things in the morning." He pauses and lets out a huff as he tries to fluff his pillow.

Yoongi waits quietly for him to continue, which he does shortly after.

"He said that was fine so we'll make sure to have what you left back here before you have to leave for work." He then turns his head to look at Yoongi. "Was it just your phone and the car?"

Yoongi nods shortly.

He feels relieved not only that Taehyung had thought about Yoongi having his car and phone back before work tomorrow– which had completely been overlooked by himself– and even more-so when he thinks about Taehyung not being the one picking them up as he'd just said it'd be Soobin.

The less contact with Jungkook Taehyung has the better in Yoongi's opinion.

In fact, maybe he'll try to figure out a way to get someone else to help with the house...

Taehyung seems to be pretty set on Jungkook but maybe Yoongi can talk him into someone else. Someone-

"Goodnight my little devil," Taehyung mutters.

Yoongi gulps as Taehyung moves closer to him and presses his nose against Yoongi's shoulder.

"Night," he whispers back quietly.

He stares sadly at the ceiling, mind racing and eyes tearing up again, as he gradually hears Taehyung's breathing deepen.

The room seems to darken into complete blackness as tension fills his body.

Yoongi is a devil in disguise, isn't he. A devil engaged to one Angel while another offers him his whole heart.

Pick me. Choose me. Love me the line from the dumb doctor show repeats in his mind.

He's going to have to pick between them. That's what this all is set to boil down to and... Yoongi inhales shakily.

What a fucking mess.