*Update - I've added a lyric video of Ready to Run at the end of this chapter. Enjoy!

Ready to Run - one direction

Hope's determination was pushing her past the nerves she felt at making a 4 hour drive alone. After telling her mom that her friend Angela could go, her mom seemed to back down and agree, slightly. Hope was still required to check in with her mom at least 3 times per day. She also called Diane, the woman who had run the campground since they started going, to have her check on Hope as well.

Diane was nice enough. Hope remembered that she always made cookies for the kids staying on the campground. She also remembered Diane's son, Ethan. He was a couple of years older than Hope. He would sometimes hang out around with some of the kids but mostly he had his own crowd. She always felt uncomfortable around him, she figured that was because he was older and a guy. But she wondered if there was more to it.

Hope would see Ethan down on the beach or playing ball with kids near the campground. She knew who he was, even his name, but had never talked to him when they were young. When she was thirteen and he was fifteen she noticed him hanging around more often. She thought he would look at her sometimes, but she would never make eye-contact let alone try talking to him. He never approached her either. She wasn't sure what to think of him back then. But as she got older, and he got taller, she became more nervous when she saw him around. He would smile, he was friendly but something about him made her heart race and her palms sweat.

Well, it didn't matter now, she was on her way up there today. Maybe Ethan was off on his own. She took a deep breath and put thoughts of him aside. She turned her attention to packing. Luckily her mom hadn't started cleaning out the garage of dad's left behind camping gear so she had everything she needed. Her bag was ready and she also packed some easy food to take. Her mom gave her money to grab fast food as well. She would only be gone for three days so she didn't need that much.

While she packed, she glanced around her room and thought about other years when she was preparing to go camping. Her family was always rushing around at the last minute getting everything put in the coolers or the back of the van. She saw her picture once again, the one of her and her mom on the beach in Morro Bay. She was little, probably 3, but the memories were still so vivid and strong. She saw her little mason jar of shells, all found on those trips, which she would add to each year. Each layer represented one of those trips. Hope kept trinkets, like post cards and mini ships in mini bottles, purchased while on those trips. She had scrapbooks with brochures from museums, boat tours, tickets to different events; all from the family camping trips. It seemed a little silly to keep all of that memorabilia, but she loved every single thing and couldn't bear to part with any of it.

She was excited to be going back there, finally. Just missing one year felt like much longer to her. She suddenly worried that she had missed something last year, but quickly told herself that was a silly thought. What could I possibly have missed? And now I'm headed up there alone.

As Hope remembered about Angela not really going along, her stomach did a flip. She was worried about being alone almost as much as getting caught in a lie. She pushed the little warning bells in her stomach away with a deep breath and continued to prepare. She put her bags, food and camping supplies in the trunk of her Honda, a hand-me-down from her mom. Her mom's boss had given her a great deal on a used BMW, so Hope took ownership of the Honda. It wasn't her dream car, but she certainly wasn't going to complain. It got her where she needed to go, and that was fine with her. She considered herself "low-maintenance" and didn't need anything fancy.

As her car was loaded, she called out to her mom, "I'm gonna leave, Mom!"

"Okay, honey! Call when you get there!" she replied. Really? She didn't even come out of the house. Hope took a long look back at her house, the same house she had lived in her entire life. It was average sized, one story, nothing that stood out from the rest of the houses on the block. But this house was holding so much within its walls that needed to come out. She wondered if it would and if things would ever change, especially between her and her mom. Hope stuffed her disappointment back down, hopped in the car and backed out of the driveway. I can do this she told herself.

She plugged her phone in, opened Spotify and got some music going to take her mind off of her nerves. Ready to Run was playing and she thought to herself, I sure am. Ready to run away from everything bothering her, ready to run from being forgotten, ready to run to something different. Good different, she hoped.

Hope. She always thought it was ironic that her parents had named her that, considering she had never felt too hopeful. She worried more than she hoped. It just came naturally to her it seemed. She worried, but she also kept her worries to herself. She didn't really have a best friend to confide these things to. Angela was as close as she could get to a "bestie" but even Hope never truly opened up to her. She was just a really quiet girl, and that was that.

She became lost in her own thoughts and almost missed the on ramp to the 101 north in Glendale. Only 3 1/2 hours to go...ugh. She started to wonder what the hell she had been thinking doing this alone.

"No more!" she said aloud to herself. Hope was tired of always second guessing herself and letting her fears rule her life. She was done with her own negativity, at least for now. Who knows what tomorrow would bring...

Her thoughts took her to the last time she had been camping. Her family was still whole, well, as whole as it had ever been. But even Hope had to acknowledge that their family hadn't been really happy and whole for a long time, longer than she could remember. Now that she thought about it, there always seemed to be a distance between her parents. For many years, anyway, they had their own interests and didn't spend a lot of time together. The camping trip was the one constant, the one guaranteed time that the family would spend together, with both parents somewhat present. Even on that last trip, the signs were there.

The family had secured the same camp site as always that year. Hope was 16 and Brad, well he was still a little bugger at the time. He was 10 and kind of a pain to be around. He whined a lot for a ten year old. He tended to follow her around that summer, maybe he sensed what was happening with her parents before she did.

Her dad had a "camp buddy" that year, Big Mike. His site was next to theirs and the two of them would go fishing everyday while her mom hung around the campsite lost in a book or a magazine. That left Brad and her to find their own fun. They mostly walked the beach looking for rocks or sand dollars. A few times her mom had put her book down and taken them sight seeing, usually down to the shops near the marina or over to Morro Rock.

Hope noticed Ethan more that year, he was at least 18 by then. He did a few odd jobs around the campground, helping his mom out. Hope saw him drive off in his truck, a black Ford, as they pulled up to their campsite that year. He gave her family a wave as he left. She watched him with some of the younger kids over that weekend. It seemed like he enjoyed kids, at least playing sports with them, which is what he was usually doing when he wasn't working. It also seemed like he looked over at Hope, a lot.

One day Ethan was hanging around with some kids on the beach playing soccer. He saw Brad and Hope, smiled at her and came up to them. She stood awkwardly as he approached them. As Ethan got closer, Brad ran down the beach and left Hope to face him alone. She looked down and started digging her shoe into the sand nervously. She just couldn't make eye-contact and had no idea what to say to him.

"Hey, Hope right?" he asked. She looked up at him and almost gasped at how blue his eyes were. She hadn't been close enough to notice before. His eyes were a stark contrast to his darker, olive toned skin and black hair. He always seemed to be wearing a black Yankees cap which shaded his eyes. Unnecessary considering it was always cloudy here. There was hardly more than an hour of sun each day even though it was June.

"Yeah, hey" was all she could come up with. She should have at least said his name. He made her really nervous.

"A bunch of us are gonna have a bonfire later, wanna come?" He was smiling as he asked, gesturing down the beach where the bonfire would be. That was not what she expected him to say. Actually, she hadn't had a clue why he would have come up to her in the first place, so anything he said would have been unexpected.

"Um...uh...I don't know. Maybe, I have to ask first" she stammered. His gaze, it seemed, was piercing her soul and she could hardly put together a coherent thought. The butterflies in her stomach were going crazy.

"Okay, well, we'll be here when the sun goes down" he called over his shoulder as he walked away, still smiling. He seemed so confident. Hope just felt confused.

She let out a breath she didn't know she was holding. Did she want to go? She wasn't really sure, she didn't know any of these kids and that made her really uncomfortable. But she was also tired of just sitting around the campsite. Still, even with the butterflies having an all out war in her stomach, something made her want to go.

Hope decided she might as well ask her mom if it was okay. She would probably say no anyway and that would give her an out. She hunted down Brad and got him to head back to their campsite to find her mom. Dad was fishing again with Big Mike so she didn't need to bother looking for him.

She found her mom right where she had left her, sitting in a camping chair, reading a trashy novel. She said "Hey, Mom" at least three times before she finally looked up.

"Yeah, what's up?"her mom asked, then looked back at her book.

"Um, Ethan said some kids were gonna have a bonfire later. He said I could go, so is that okay?" Hope's heart was pounding and she wasn't sure if she wanted her mom to agree or to shut it down.

"Ethan, huh?" her mom looked back up at her and raised an eyebrow. Hope just rolled her eyes, classic teenage move. "So where is this bonfire happening?"

"Just down at the end of the trail, " Hope gestured back to the trail leading to the shore, "at sunset."

"Well, I guess it's alright since it's so close. Sure, go ahead. Have fun with Ethan," her mom smirked. Hope gave her the eye roll again. And she realized that her excuse not to go just disappeared.

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Author's note:

What do you think of Ethan so far? Are you shipping Hope and Ethan yet, or is he a creep?

Note on chapter title - Ready to Run

So, you can probably tell that the chapter doesn't take the song literally. Hope is not running off with the love of her life, but she IS running away from her home drama. Although Hope's "drama" isn't outwardly portrayed with yelling and fighting, there is drama. Hope's drama is more internal, and to her dismay, she will bring much of it with her. "Baggage" as they say...

Here're the boys...

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