Jack and the guys walk over to listen in, standing close to the wall so they don't see them.

"Don't speak, just listen. Today I have put so many nails in those boards imagining it was your face, I hurt you in my mind over and over again today and I thought if I did that, if I hurt you in my mind that my pain would go away but it didn't, it made it worse Ryan.

Every time I see you, I just want to hurt you the way you hurt me but nothing I do to you can even begin to be the same amount of pain I'm in.

You are the first guy in a long time I opened up to and loved, I loved you so damn much I went out and bought a ring like a fucking fool.

I wanted to spend everyday and night with you by my side as my husband, I wanted to have a family with you, I wanted to watch our children grow up and get married and start their own family. I wanted to grow old with you, I wanted to have a life with you. Do you notice the one word that is common with all that?"

"Wanted." Ryan whispers.

"Yes exactly, wanted as in I don't want that anymore, instead I want you to hurt for the rest of your life, I want you to think about me and think about last night when you heard and saw me, when you heard how much pain you put me though and saw the pain in my face and eyes. I want you to regret ever hurting me and I want you to know I am going to be the one that got away, I want you to realize what a mistake it was for you to hurt me like you did. I could have given you the world, I would have done everything I could to make you happy and I thought I did, I thought I made you happy.

You told me you loved me, you made me fall in love with you so easy. God it was so easy to fall in love with your laugh, your smile, your eyes, your touch, your kiss, your heart and your soul. It was so easy to let my guard down around you and to let you in, I let you love me like you asked me to do. I let you make love me to in the way I was craving and let you love me, I let you love me." Ethan said as tears fall form his eyes. Ryan stands there and tries to reach for Ethan.

"Don't touch me, if you touch me right now, I am going to break even more. After the hell you know I went though, after everything I have been through and after you promising me that you would never hurt me, why did you, with Jacob of all people? Why would you do that to me? I thought you loved me Ryan, I thought you wanted to be together just as much as I did.

You wanted me to wait for you and I fucking bought you a ring, me the one person who is scared as hell to fall in love and open myself up. I fell in love with you and wanted to spend my life with you. You have no idea how much pain I am in right now, you have no idea how much I want to just beat the living hell out of you for causing me this much pain, want to know the worst part? Alan never hurt me as much as you did." With that Ethan turns around and leaves Ryan standing there.

Ryan felt his heart shatter at Ethan's words. He falls to the ground and just cries, not for himself but for the pain he has caused Ethan.

When Ethan turned the corner, he saw Jack and the guys standing there and gasped.

"God damn it guys you scared the hell out of me." Ethan said putting his hand on his heart.

"I'm sorry, we didn't mean to."

"What are you doing here?" Ethan asked.

"Well we wanted to hear what you had to say, I know I shouldn't have listened as it was a private conversation, but I couldn't help myself. I told Ryan to go back when he showed up earlier, I told him it wasn't a good idea to be around you yet. He didn't listen." Ethan nods and starts walking away.

Jack walks beside him. "I see what you mean by your words can hurt him more than hitting him. He looked hurt."

"Like I care if he is fucking hurt Jack?!" Ethan yelled.

"Woah, I didn't mean he was hurt, I meant he looked hurt because he hurt you the way he did."

"I don't want to talk about this right now. I'm gonna shower and go to bed. I'll see you tomorrow." Ethan walks into the shed and sits on the chair and sighs.

He takes his watch and necklace and shoes off and sighs. He grabs his bag and pulls out all of his stuff that's in it. As he unfolds a pair of sweat pants a picture of him and Ryan falls onto the bed.

He sees it and stops and picks it up, holding it in hands and cries. He throws the picture against the wall with great force, glass falling everywhere and the frame breaking apart. He walks over to clean it up and steps on a big piece of glass and hisses.

He sits back on the bed and pulls the glass out and hops to the bathroom and grabs a towel and puts it on his foot. He sighs and shakes his head. He sees the towel is getting redder so he ties it around his foot and hops outside and yells for help.

A couple guys run over. "What happened?"

"I stepped on some glass and the bleeding wont stop."

"Ok let's get you to the ER." He said and the guys help him to the ER.

They walk into the ER and Ethan gets checked in. As they are sitting there

"Show EmWhat Your Made Of" comes on and Ethan sings and tears fall onto his cheeks. By now everyone on the base know what has happened with him and Ryan.

"It's alright Ethan, we won't judge for you letting yourself feel the pain. Not many of us here have not cried in front of someone, it's ok to let it out." Ethan looks up to Jack who is kneeling in front of him. He puts his hand on Ethan's shoulder and he cries even more.

"It's so stupid to cry at a damn song but it just comes and goes. I was unpacking and a picture of me and Ryan fell onto the bed and I threw it against the wall and I went to clean it up and cut my foot and now I'm here crying like an idiot. It's just my fate, emotional pain isn't enough, gotta have the physical pain to go with it." Just as Jack was about to say something a nurse calls Ethan back.

A couple hours later he got eight stitches in his foot and is given mild pain meds and antibiotics and is signed out. He hops out of the room and sees the three guys still waiting on him.

"You guys didn't have to wait for me. I am fine to get back to my room."

"It's no problem Ethan. Come on." Jack takes Ethan and helps him out of the hospital and the other guy gets on his other side.

"Use me, lean on me take the weight off your foot and let us help you get back. You don't need your foot to touch the dirt you know." Jack said and Ethan did what he asked.

They make it back to his room and the guys turn to walk away.

"Thanks, guys for the help." Ethan said to them.

"You're welcome. Have a good night." One of them said and they walk away.

Jack is in the room with Ethan and sees the glass and frame broken on the floor. He starts to clean it and picks up the picture.

He sees how happy Ethan is, the happiness in his eyes and his bright smile and in Ryan's eyes and smile.

'They were truly happy' He thought to himself. After he gets done cleaning up the glass and frame he puts the picture on the dresser and looked over at Ethan who was sleeping on the bed.

He smiles and covers him up and walks out of the room. He shuts the door quietly and walks over to Ryan's room. He knocks and Ryan answers it half a sleep.

"Just wanted to let you know Ethan went to the ER. Don't worry he's ok, he cut his foot on glass from a picture he threw against the wall. He's sleeping now. Just stay away from him for a while, he's hurting Ryan and he needs time to heal, give it to him." Jack says that and walks away.

Ryan sighs and shuts his door and goes to Ethan's room. He walks in and noticed the picture on the dresser and picks it up and looks at it for a while and looks over at Ethan who is looking at him, Ryan gasps and closes his eyes.

"Sorry, I heard you got hurt and wanted to see if you were ok. I didn't mean to disturb you." He says and turns around about to walk out.

"Ryan?" At the sound of his name from Ethan's voice, he stops dead in his tracks.

He turns around. "Yes?" He said hoping Ethan would ask him to stay.

"Take that and leave. I don't want to be reminded of us anymore than I have to being here. I threw it against the wall because I was so pissed and hurt that I didn't want it anymore." Ethan said and rolled over and cries silently, not wanting Ryan to see or hear him.

Ryan walks out and goes to find Jake. He turns the corner of the building Jake is usually at and sees him drinking a beer.

Jake hands him one and he sits down.

"What did I do Jake?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Ethan."

Jake nods knowing that's what he meant. "You did a really dumb thing Ryan, you are an idiot for hurting him like you did. Why?"

"I don't know, I know that's such a poor excuse, but I don't know, it just happened."

"No just once is 'just happened' but it's been going on for weeks. There has to be a reason besides it just happened Ryan. Ethan isn't going to want to hear that and you know it, you need to figure out why, the real reason. You know he came here last night and had a couple beers with me. He seems like a good man."

"He really is, he's one of the best I have ever met. His heart is pure even with all the hurt that's in his heart, he has a big heart and I feel like shit. He has had a hard past especially with his ex, it was bad and tonight Ethan told me that I hurt him more than his ex ever did and his ex hurt him badly. That is the only thing that stung the worst and he said a lot that hurt but that, that's the worst thing he said and he's right, I hurt him, and I have no idea how to even begin to repair us. I don't think there is even an us anymore. I don't blame him, I fucked up big time."

"That you did. You have no one to blame but yourself for this Ryan, I don't mean to be a dick, but you know I don't sugar coat shit."

"I know and you're right. It is my fault and I don't know what to do. You know he was going to ask me to marry him? I would have said yes in a heartbeat, I still would if he asked but that isn't going to happen. I lost him Jake, he's never going to forgive me for what I did, and I can't hold that against him. He has been the perfect boyfriend and I end up losing the best thing that has happened to me." Ryan had tears in his eyes as he thinks of what Ethan said to him and seeing the pain in his beautiful blue eyes.

He drinks the rest of the beer and stands up. "Thanks for the beer man, I'm going to bed."

"Good night."

"Night." Ryan walks back to his room and looks at Ethan's door and sighs and goes inside his room. Jacob is in his room naked in his bed.

"What the fuck are you doing here Jacob?" Ryan asked annoyed tossing him his clothes."Wanted to see if I can help relax you."

"No now get out." Ryan said looking toward the door.

"Come on, you can't tell me you don't want to relieve some stress after that shit with Ethan?" Ryan sighs and grabs Jacob's arm and he pushes him outside and shuts the door.