It's terrifying, the chill of freedom. Her brother is by her bed and she thinks he might be breaking (she knows that he had it coming; he's been strong for too long.)

guard·ed
/ˈɡärdəd/

adjective;
cautious and having possible reservations.

And as she closes her eyes, hoping it's the last time, she thinks she's might've been strong for too long, too.

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ⁱ Tear in My Heart | Twenty One Pilots

ⁱⁱ SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK | Joji

ⁱⁱⁱ Dead! | My Chemical Romance