🧴

SNOW zooms past her mother's questions of the dried blood on her chin the minute she enters her house and stomps towards her room. the door behind her shuts with a bang, drowning out the noise of her mother's surprise.

immediately snow heads to her mirror, propped up against a giant teddy bear her dad won her when she was five but it's significance was lowered to just "the thing that props my mirror" and would constantly forget of its existence.

she reached to touch her face, "this needs to heal. this is gonna leave a mark," she mumbles worriedly. she glances towards her hair, a sweaty mop of curls in an attempt of a cute messy bun that was unfortunately missing the cute after she ran out of the park.

a pang of disappointment flashes over snow's eyes and her cheeks grew red with embarrassment despite being alone.

she squeezed her fists right as she looked at her reflection one more time.

it was settled. this would be the last day she saw her curls. she recalled every time her mother insisted she would straighten it more and hated herself for ever arguing with her about keeping her curls. she had tried so long to love it. but being berated by her mother, bullied as a kid for her hair in an environment that didn't see much of the same, struggling to get it done and feel confident every day. she would give up for the sake of a glow up and the sake of her self-esteem.

all she had to do was straighten it every week, and not get it wet meanwhile. sooner or later everyone would have forgot what snow used to look like and embrace who she was now. the transition couldn't be more seamless as they begin a new year. if only she was prepared to embrace it.

she recalled the absolute embarrassment of the park. she hated seeming inferior in front of them. surely if she looked older, taller, hair fancier, a workout set on instead of an old t-shirt and shorts, they wouldn't have said anything.

all the more reason to do it, snow thinks.

with a groan, she stomps out of her room to find her mother had been waiting by the door.

"ma!" snow exclaimed. "you scared me!"

"what happened to your face?" ms. nieves asks, grabbing her daughter's face with her free hand. the other held a broom tightly until her knuckles were white. concern etched all over her face. snow couldn't tell if it was because of those boys, or her mother's obsession with her looks.

"i got hit by a basketball," snow sighs. "i'll clean my face, don't worry—"

"mija, you went out con tu pelo así?" her mother asks, ignoring her daughter's words.

snow felt another pang of disappointment. her eyes threatened to water.

"ma can you let me go please i was just about to ask if i can use your straightener?"

ms. nieves lets go and leaves her broom in the hallway, walking towards her own room. "finally!"

snow rolls her eyes behind her as she reluctantly follows.

"i've been telling you, you know how i love your curls pero it's gonna much easier if you just straighten it. you look much older and even prettier," her mother explains with large hand gestures. she returns from her room, with her blow dryer, straightener, and heat protectants. "toma."

snow eyes the devices nervously as her mother placed them in her hands. she looked up at her mom who had a proud look.

"it's so good to see you growing up," she beamed, and leaned into her daughter for a kiss on her head. "te quiero. now go shower."  she grabs her boom and returns to the kitchen.

snow enjoyed the warmth of her mother, believing ms. nieves didn't understand what her own words implied. every day was the same. another fuel for her to glow up. another reason to feel like crap.

and top it all off her adrenaline rush moments before at the park made her act the most embarrassing of ways. calling their manhood small? where did that even come from?

snow slammed the door behind her and threw herself on her bed, tossing the devices in her hand towards her pillow.

___*.•