Hawkins, Indiana | 1984

in cali, it would still be sunny. that's what tj keeps telling herself to stay sane, anyway. she hates it here. she wishes so desperately that she'd wake up and every part of the last couple of months was all a bad dream.

except it isn't. and her lame first day of school only adds to that anxiety of her new life in hawkins.

the town itself isn't bad. there's quite a bit to do, considering how small the town is. but the people are anything but accepting and inviting. it's totally an elitist town. you're nothing unless you're someone.

tj's car sits in the high school parking lot after her first day. watching the way these people watch other people is gross. they stare with eyes like vultures, waiting to prey on some poor kid who never stood a chance on their own.

tj sees right through the facade. billy? billy feeds on it. thanks to her brother, she's had a few people try and talk to her— tj knows it's only because they're trying to get a connection with him so they can hook up. billy has this genuine hairband style and all these girls are eating it up like candy. and tj's only there to serve as a doormat? i don't hardly think so, tj grumbles inside her head.

her car— a 1977 bronco with personalized plates (tj har)— revs to life as she turns over the ignition. a keychain with a california bear dangles from her key.

before tj can back out of her parking spot, two gigantic hands pound on the window. tj doesn't even flinch; she knows it's billy. she rolls the window down and greets her twin with a glare.

"can i help you?"

"pick up the brat," he says, no hint of negotiation in his tone.

"no," tj says.

"go pick up the brat." billy grits his teeth.

"i heard you the first time. i said no."

"why not?"

"because that's your job and because dad asked me to help susan unpack."

"jesus," he gripes. billy's face softens, but only for a split second.

"don't piss off the old man, then."

"trying not to."

billy leaves promptly and tj peels out of the parking lot, heading straight home.

tj hates her dad. and she hates max's dad, too. billy resents the kid for the way their family is now, but it's not even max's fault. billy just likes having someone to take his anger out on.

•

when tj pulls into her driveway, no one else is home.

"cool," she says, looking forward to what limited time she has to herself. susan isn't home, so no need to bother herself with unpacking stuff that isn't hers.

after killing the engine, tj makes her way inside, one backpack strap over her shoulder. tj hides herself away in her room and tosses all her things onto her bed. besides the pink quilt on her bed— which she's had since she was twelve— and the old desk in the corner, there's not much in her room. the few boxes she has full of her belongings are tucked into the opposite corner and, other than that, her room is empty.

billy offered a couple mötley crüe posters to jazz up the place, but tj refused anything of his. what little they have, they keep to themselves.

tj takes a seat on her bed. a flier for a party falls out of her backpack as she pulls out her english book and a pad of paper.

"'come and get sheet-faced'. that's so freaking lame."

tj loves parties, but she wants nothing to do with any that happen in or around hawkins. at least in cali she had friends to get drunk with. now what's she supposed to do? hang with billy? no freaking way. even being twins, tj can hardly stand her brother most of the time.

she crumples the flier and throws it across the room.

billy comes home hours later and invites himself into tj's room.

"sure, come in."

"go to that party," billy says by way of greeting.

"what party?"

"don't play stupid. i know you got an invite."

"so what? i don't want anything to do with this godforsaken place."

"just go and get drunk. it'll be fun."

tj frowns. "get drunk with who?"

"you act like we didn't share the womb."

"i'm not getting drunk with my brother. you realize how pathetic that is?"

"more pathetic than staying home by yourself on halloween?"

"don't you have a twerp to annoy?"

"she's at the arcade," billy shrugs. "just go. we don't even have to talk to each other. you come out on top, too, and we'll run this place. just like back home."

"the only thing i'm worried about now is getting into berkeley."

"man!" billy yells. "you used to be so much fun. don't let the kid ruin a good time before it even happens."

"she's not ruining anything. she's going through shit, too—"

"whatever," he interrupts, not wanting to hear his own blood sister defend the annoying new brat they're forced to take care of. "you're going if i have to drag you there."

"get out of my room, dumbass." tj gives billy a hard shove and he promptly leaves.

tj turns back to her college applications.