A = Affection (How does he show affection? What's his PDA level from 1-10?)
Derek's PDA level is 8/10; he loves to show his affection for you whenever he can. Derek is always kissing your cheek, hugging you from behind, holding your hand, or kissing you. Derek likes to give you physical affection because it shows you that he genuinely cares for you.

B = Beginning (How does your relationship start?)
You don't get into a relationship with the hot neurosurgeon until 2 years after you meet him. At the time you meet, he's in the middle of dealing with his estranged wife Addison Montgomery and his girlfriend/mistress Meredith Grey. Derek develops feelings for you after getting to know you for a year, but he hopes to repress his feelings for you by attempting to fix his marriage with Addison, and later getting into a relationship with Meredith. After both ultimately fail, Derek expresses his feelings for you, which you obviously reciprocated. Thus began the start of your unconventional yet romantic relationship with Derek Shepherd.

C = Commitment (What are his thoughts on a long-term relationship?)
Derek takes commitment very seriously. He has no interest partaking in a fling or a friends with benefits arrangement. Derek wants to be in a relationship, and he has to know that you're either in or out. He's not interested in playing games when it comes to relationships.

D = Death (What would he do if you died? What would you do if he died?)
Your death will kill Derek. He refuses to live without you; a world without you is a world that Derek never wants to live in. He's made it crystal clear that if you die, Derek will never recover.

Derek's death will break you. You won't date for a while because you'll feel like you're betraying him. You won't be able to look at or talk to Amelia for a few months due to your grieving and mourning over him. You'll continue to work in Neuro, and you'll be Amelia's protégé. You and Amelia will bond more over Derek's death, and you'll both hate Callie's girlfriend, Penny, who was Derek's doctor. Life won't be the same without Derek, but you'll manage to go on without him.

E = Ending (How would he end the relationship?)
Derek would hate himself for ending the relationship, but he would do so if it were in your best interests, not his. Derek already went through a lot of crap when he slept with Meredith, and he wouldn't want you to suffer like Meredith suffered. The only difference is that you weren't in a relationship with Derek while he was married. Derek would rather break up with you than watch you and your career suffer because of your relationship with him. He would tell you that you didn't do anything wrong – he's only ending things because he thinks you'll be better off without him. Derek loves you so much that he's willing to set you free. Your happiness is all he cares about.

F = Future (Can he see himself with you in the next 10-20 years? What would your future with him look like?)
Derek knows that he sees himself with you in the next 10-20 years. You'll get married after being together for a year, have twins – a boy (Derek Jr./DJ) and a girl (Amelia), have successful careers as world-class neurosurgeons, and live in your dream house that you and Derek built. You'll be the one to force Derek to retire, and he'll protest. You'll win the argument, and you'll both live out your retirement watching your children grow up to become surgeons and watching over your grandchildren while DJ and Amelia are at work. You'll be proud of the life you and Derek have lived together.

G = Good-natured (Does he see himself as good or bad?)
Derek is flawed – as is everyone else – but he believes that he's a good man. You know that he's a good man; he tries to do the right thing by everyone else rather than himself. Though Derek has done a few questionable things, he's still a damn good man, nonetheless.

H = Hugs (How does he hug? How often does he hug you?)
Derek hugs you from behind, enjoying the surprised reaction you elicit. He also likes to give you a side-hug – pulling you to his side while his arm is around your shoulders or waist. Derek hugs you very often; once or twice a day. It's not considered clingy, and he loves watching you smile whenever he gives you one of his infamous hugs.

I = Intimacy (What is he like in the bedroom?)
Derek likes being intimate with you, and his behavior in the bedroom reflects on that. He always goes the extra mile to make it meaningful for you – rose petals, candles, etc. – he wants you to enjoy yourself and be comfortable. Derek's touches are light but also firm, and he tends to your needs first. His chivalry doesn't fade when it comes to getting between the sheets, and he enjoys post-sex cuddles, too. Derek is the kind of lover that every man should be like.

J = Jealousy (How does he display jealousy?)
Though Derek knows that you'd never leave him, he can't help but feel a little bit jealous of other good-looking doctors... particularly Mark Sloan and Jackson Avery. If Derek feels threatened by another man, he'll just casually walk up to you and interrupt your conversation. If the guy doesn't get the hint, Derek will start planting little kisses on your neck, and give the guy an occasional death glare. That's when the other man leaves out of discomfort, and Derek smirks in satisfaction. You enjoy making Derek jealous because you love seeing him get so possessive of you.

K = Kisses (What are his kisses like?)
Derek's kisses are meaningful, and they can be either long or short. He likes to put passion into all of his kisses with you because it displays how much he loves and adores you. You love kissing Derek, because there's always something about each kiss that leaves you wanting more of McDreamy.

L = Love (How long does it take him to say the L-word?)
Derek likes to take his time in a relationship, but it took him a month to say the L-word to you. He knew right when he met you that he had feelings for you, and he didn't know that he loved you until the second week in your relationship. The realization had crept up on him, and he didn't realize that it was love he was feeling until an hour later. As soon as Derek said he loved you, you didn't hesitate to say it back. The affirmation that Derek Shepherd loved you told you that you two had something real going on.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with him?)
On his very rare day off, Derek makes the most out of his morning with you. He's up earlier than you so he can start a pot of coffee and begin cooking breakfast. By the time he's made you a cup of coffee and a plate of breakfast on a tray, you're starting to wake up. Waking up to a smiling Derek, a fresh cup of coffee, and a plate of breakfast makes you feel very thankful for him. Honestly, who else would enjoy waking up early just to make their partner breakfast in bed?

N = Night (How are nights spent with him?)
Nights with Derek are various, seeing as you're both surgeons, and have different schedules. But you manage to make it work out. Nights when you're on call include a cafeteria dinner and cuddle sessions in on-call rooms. Nights at home either include takeout and a movie or homecooked dinner with wine. It doesn't matter what the details of your night include because you're spending time with Derek; that's all that truly matters to you and to him.

O = Open (When would he start revealing things about himself? Does he say everything all at once, or does he wait a while to reveal things?)
Before you two were in a relationship, Derek would tell you some personal details of himself – his marriage to Addison, the Mark thing, his sisters, living in New York. He'd tell you these things because he trusted you, and he knew that you wouldn't tell anyone else about them. After you started dating, Derek would tell you other bits and pieces about himself and his life... but not all at once. Derek doesn't want you to be overwhelmed with so much information in a short period of time. He also wants you to have your own time to tell him personal things about yourself.

P = Patience (How easy is it for him to get angry?)
Unless you tell him that you're sleeping with Mark Sloan, Derek doesn't get angry with you. He instead gets frustrated/upset or disappointed, which is a lot worse than anger in your opinion. Derek can tolerate a lot of things, but he won't tolerate dishonesty and adultery. Derek has a lot of patience because he knows that it's better to be patient with you rather than act impulsively. He knows that if he gets angry, he will say something that he'll regret, and he doesn't want to hurt you.

Q = Questions (Does he ask you a lot of personal questions?)
At the start of your relationship, Derek asked you some personal questions. He doesn't ask them very often because he doesn't want to be perceived as nosey. You appreciate that he doesn't ask so many personal questions, because it gives you the space you need to tell Derek things about yourself or your life on your own.

R = Romance (Is he good at being romantic? What's something he does that's romantic?)
Derek Shepherd is a romance expert. He excels at romance, and it's really due to the fact that he's had plenty of experience with his past love life. Something he does that's romantic is that Derek will draw up a bath for you if he gets home from work before you do. He knows that you've had a long, stressful day and that you'll just want to relax. What's even better is that he gives you a back massage to soothe your aching muscles. Just knowing that he's done this for you is more than enough to make you feel loved and special.

S = Security (How protective is he? How would he protect you? How would he like to be protected?)
When it comes to you, Derek is a worrier. He's protective, but he's not overprotective. Derek would protect you by taking you somewhere safe and hiding you; Derek would rather he get hurt than you get hurt. You are also a worrier when it comes to Derek Shepherd. You would give up your life in exchange for Derek's; that's how much you love him. Though Derek would tell you that you shouldn't risk your life for him, you'd tell him that you'd do anything for those you love... even if it meant dying for them.

T = Try (How much effort does he put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
Derek always goes the extra mile to make sure that every date/outing you two go on is considered perfect. Sometimes he overthinks, but you find it adorable. He saves important dates – such as the day of your first kiss, first date, anniversary, etc. – because these days are important to the both of you. You have to reign Derek in when it comes to gifts, because he's willing to be extravagant most of the time. You truly appreciate the thought behind every one of his gifts, and you usually reward him with a kiss and a promise of dirty sex. Derek also puts in extra effort into performing his portion of household chores, so you don't think that he's lazy or incompetent. With everything that Derek does and puts forth effort into, it makes you appreciate and love him more and more.

U = Ugly (What is a bad habit of his?)
Everyone has bad habits, including Derek. One of his really bad habits is pacing. Whenever Derek has something stressful going on with a patient, he starts pacing. At first, it doesn't bother you, because you need to let Derek think however he needs to think. But after a while, it gets concerning, and you wonder if he'll put a hole in the floor or carpet of whatever room he's pacing in. Even with his pacing habits, you still love him.

V = Vanity (How concerned is he with his looks?)
Derek is somewhat vain, but not extremely vain. He knows he's good-looking; that's why he's known as McDreamy amongst the residents and the interns. But Derek doesn't let his looks get the better of him. He keeps himself grounded, and he doesn't let his good genetics go to his head – you are grateful that you don't have to experience his ego at times.

W = Whole (Does he feel incomplete without you?)
Without a doubt, Derek would die without you. As Denny once said, Derek still believes in magic, true love, and soulmates. Derek Shepherd feels whole when he's with you. Living without you would be torture for him; he's deeply and madly in love with you.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon fact for him)
When Derek was younger, he witnessed two men kill his father over his watch. Witnessing his father's murder is what inspired him to become a doctor – so he could help people. He takes commitment and family very seriously, and he never passes up an opportunity to make other people smile when they need it.

Y = Yuck (What are some things he won't like, either in general or in a partner?)
If you have a history of being unfaithful or adulterous, Derek won't have any interest in you. He's already been hurt by Addison and Mark's adultery; he cannot go through that again. If you're dishonest and you keep secrets, Derek knows that he's wasting his time with you. He needs a girl who's honest and open, but also a bit reserved and willing to open up to him.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of his?)
At night, Derek has to sleep facing you. He has to know that you're there – it calms him when he looks at your (usually) sleeping form, and know that you'll still be there in the morning. He then kisses your head, whispers 'I love you,' and falls asleep knowing that the last thing he's seen is you.

GAGAGAGA

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Next Update:  SFW Alphabet with George O'Malley

Published:  2/19/2021