Tyler's POV

I snatch the phone from the desk, and my eyes hungrily devour the new text flashing on the screen.

*I know this is crazy, and I should stay away from you...but I just can't help myself. Been missing you ever since you left...Hope we can work it out. xoxo*

For a split second I feel pure elation wash over me...until I notice the sender's name.

Fucking Nicole.

Any momentary joy I'd felt has instantly evaporated, and I am sensing a wave of anger rising up inside me. This woman is largely responsible for my fucked up trust issues...but enough with the blame game already. It doesn't matter what I've been through in the past...it should not have such a strong hold on my present or future. If I have any hopes of working it out with Carrie, I need to put old ghosts to rest.

Clearly, even after months of being ignored, Nicole still hasn't gotten the message. Perhaps it's cruel of me to refuse to engage in any communication with her, and god knows she doesn't deserve any kind of sympathy from me, but maybe if I just give her the needed closure she'll leave me the fuck alone once and for all.

I text her back: *I'll call you this weekend. We need to talk.*

I get an instant reply: *Can't wait to hear your voice...xoxo*

I ignore her transparent flirtation, and put away my phone. This is a good first step. Face up to my fucked up past, tie up all loose ends, and move forward with a clear head. Step two will be more challenging... prove to Carrie that I am not a possessive insecure psychopath, and that I love and trust her unconditionally.

I mentally pat myself on the back for my plan.

**************************************************

Carrie's POV

It seems only moments ago I was cracking open a brand new pint of Haagen-Dazs, so I'm a little surprised when my spoon hits the bottom of the ice cream carton. I've always been an emotional eater, but this is probably the quickest that I've consumed this much in one sitting.

I am experiencing a variety of unpleasant sensations: brainfreeze, sugar-rush, oh, and let's not forget utter devastation and heartbreak.

Having my boyfriend basically set up a trap for me to ease his own insecurities felt like a stab in the back. I never thought Tyler was capable of doing something like this to me. I thought he loved me, and trusted me completely. How could I've misjudged him, how could I've been so wrong about us?

After he left, I wept, and sobbed, and then I cried some more....and I tried, really tried to understand and make sense of everything. But I just couldn't. Nothing could justify his actions in a sane way to me. I never gave him cause for concern as far as my faithfulness goes. But I knew he was already damaged before we even met. That Nicole chick sure did a number on him, but does that mean that I'm supposed make allowances based on that? Well, not at the expense of my own safety, that's for sure.

Maybe it all wouldn't have felt so terrible, if Daniel didn't turn out to be such a creep. This wasn't a harmless little trick, as Tyler probably envisioned it would be. I mean, at one point I was actually afraid Daniel might force himself on me. A cold chill runs through me as soon as the terrifying memory of him pressing down on my shoulders enters my mind.

I'm actually grateful to have given Tyler the spare key to my apartment just in case, since I have a terrible habit of locking myself out. Talk about trust. I never gave my key out to anyone before. If he hadn't come in when he did, god knows what could have happened. And it's all his fault. Yes, because of my own boyfriend I nearly experienced a sexual assault. No, I can't forgive him for this.

What am I supposed to do now? I am so confused, and hurt, and sad... The man I love doesn't trust me. And there is nothing I can do to make him. What possible future can we have together? Am I forever going to walk on eggshells, expecting some kind of an ambush, or stupid "trust test" to come out from nowhere? I can't be in a relationship like that.

And what about my trust in him? Can I trust Tyler after this? If I didn't see this coming, what else could he be planning behind my back?

This whole thing has shaken my perspective on our entire relationship. Perhaps love has made me blind...and I don't really see him for who he really is. I shudder at the thought.

Is it possible that Tyler is too possessive and domineering just like Daniel said? Have I been a fool this whole time, and not seen it?

My head is throbbing. These toxic thoughts have overflooded my brain, and I just can't think anymore.

I go to the bathroom and wash my face. My eyes are puffy and red from all the tears I've shed. My hair is a tangled mess. I look like shit, and it's a perfect reflection of my internal mental state.

I am glad I told him we need to take a break. I need time to reevaluate everything, and really consider if getting back together is going to be a healthy next step for us... And if we do get back together, what new rules do we need to establish together about open communication and trust? What boundaries do we need to set? Wow, can you tell I've read a lot of self-help articles on relationships? I could legit be a couples' therapist. Only it's not that easy to put all this crap into practice in real life.

Time. I need time to figure all this out. Meanwhile,...must resist the urge to pick up the phone and text him. I am so used to sending Tyler a goodnight text, that my fingers are itching to grab the phone. No. I won't do it. I won't think about his eyes...and how crestfallen he looked when I told him to leave. I won't think about how seeing him cry for the first time nearly broke me, and made me want to rush back into his arms. No. I have to be stronger than my emotions.

A sudden buzzing stirs me, and I reach for my phone.

*I love you. I am sorry*

My frown instantly dissolves, and a stupid smile spreads on my face. I guess one fact is still undeniable. Even after all this...I love him. I do. And the idea of not being with him is more painful than anything I'd lived through tonight. Time will give me clarity...but for now, I will just read, and reread this text...hoping it will bring me enough comfort to get me through the week.