If the first thing that comes to the mind of you kids is "Mom/Dad is going to kill me" then you failed as a parent.

If your kids are afraid of you then you failed as a parent.

If your kids can't trust you then you failed as a parent.

If your kids think about killing themselves because of you then you failed as a parent.

As a parent you should feel ashamed if your kid feels safer talking to strangers on the internet instead of talking with you about their problems.

-Don't blame it on the kids