After shedding my sweatpants, it doesn't take me as long as Tony to remove the bandages. Probably because I'm not distracted and I'm not being gentle. Once they're all gone, I can at least breathe a sigh in relief at being free of the constricting things, then I turn and catch my reflection in the mirror. I blink before turning fully in that direction.

I almost don't recognize myself. My body is all in patches of skin, raw flesh, and raw flash tinted creamy green by the ointment. The toned muscles I'd worked hard to build have waned slightly and my high metabolism has eaten away at the rest. I look almost...gaunt. Especially with my burgeoning beard, long, messy hair, and tired eyes. I don't look back at the mirror before smoothing cream over my wrists, ankles, and the rest of the worse burns. Tony comes back in just as I'm finishing up, but I barely feel like lifting my head to see him anymore. I'm having a hard time feeling anything, but I do. There's an overwhelming feeling that I can't name that's fighting with the numbness, but I'm not sure which I'd rather win.

"Here you go, G." He says and drapes something over the screen. I reach for it and hold it in my hands, then nearly chuckle before slipping it on. My eyes once again don't go to the mirror before stepping out, but do meet Tony's.

"I've got to say this is one of your cruelest pranks yet." I comment and he half-grins sheepishly.

"It's the only thing that would work. Got to keep those clean." He says while scanning me in a slightly nicer than usual hospital gown with one sleeve nearly all cut off to show off my burn. At least this gown doesn't have my ass hanging out the back. "You...ready?" He asks expectantly and my shoulders droop. "How about this, we get some food in you first. Take a little break." My eyes lift to his as I nod. "Alright." He ducks under my arm and we amble into the kitchen.

He helps me slide onto a barstool and starts the normal process of making coffee. I'm about to slide off and grab a water before he points a finger at me without even turning around from his grounds. "Need something, then ask. No moving for you." Sighing, I shake my head.

"A glass of water." I specify and I can see Tony make a mental note of this before sliding iced water my way.

"Slow sips." He tells me with a firm look and I take a tiny slurp just to please him. The cold-water tastes better than anything in the world. Tony then starts just making breakfast in our mutual silence. At least, until I break it.

"How's everyone else?"

"The kids? We've already set up safehouses for those who just wanted out while the rest are staying here. All injuries checked out and there was nothing serious. Most wanted to wait and see you. Des and Ramona have been looking after all of them most of the time since they don't trust the rest of us." Tony reports and I nod. Sounds about right considering everything they've been through. It's probably the best outcome we could hope for. "The team, however, is worried." Guilt sinks into me as Tony glances over his shoulder to look at me. "Couldn't just send them away, G, so they're still here. Giving you a little space, but..." he shrugs. "Like I said, they're worried about you."

"They don't need to be worried about me."

"Really?" Tony says and shoves everything off the stove then turns away to face me fully. "How would you feel in their position?" My jaw clenches since I know exactly how I'd feel. I was just in their position a little while ago staring at Peter in a hospital bed. "This is going to be an uphill battle kid, and I understand wanting to take your time. Just don't shut us out."

"I'm not really in the mood for a speech, Tony."

"But maybe you need one, Grant." I huff, but Tony just rounds the counter and turns the stool towards him so I have to face him. My head hangs so I don't have to meet his eyes, but he tilts my head up with a hand under my chin and another on my cheek. "You're cared for." He tells me and I feel a wave of that unnamed emotion rise up in me as tears sting my eyes.

"Cut it out, T." I object with a low growl in my voice as I swipe his hands off me, but they return instantly with a soft insistence. My eyes hesitantly meet his molten amber and suddenly I know exactly what that feeling swirling inside me is.

Shame.

"We care about you and we care about you on purpose. Despite anything and everything, do you hear me?" At this point I can't even respond because I'm crying. My head falls onto Tony's shoulder as one of his hands is on the back of my neck and the other on my arm holds me on the stool. "I've got you, kid. I've got you." He assures me scratchily and I hear him murmur to Friday to lock the doors and frost the glass so I have privacy.

"I was weak, Tony. I let him-"

"Stop that." He commands and his firm tone has me sitting up straighter. His eyes are stern now as he stands in front of me with a hand on my shoulder. "I'm not going to have You melt into a puddle of pity and self-loathing. You're strong, Grant, you've always been strong. This wound is the same as any other. You got punched. It happens sometimes. You can't let this get to you, kid." Worry leaks into his voice now, but all I'm thinking is that he doesn't hate me.

"You don't..." I take a deep breath to steady myself and hopefully swallow my tears. "You don't hate me?" The question hangs in the air for a moment with him just staring at me.

"God, kid, I swear." He shakes his head and tugs next close in an embrace with his hands keeping to my arms and shoulders. "Course I don't hate you. You're my G, my prodigy, my kid. I'll never hate you." Tony promises and despite myself a few more tears leak onto his shirt as I cling to him. An unknown amount of time passes and it simultaneously feels too long and too short at the same time. At the end once my tears are dry all I feel is exhausted.

I sit up and wipe my hands over my face as Tony pats my cheek. "I'm tired." I barely whisper and Tony nods, ducking slightly so I'm forced to meet his eyes.

"Alright. Eat a little something first, then you can head to your own bed to sleep." I nod and his hand smooths over my cheek one more time before he rounds the counter again to make me a plate of food. I eat slowly, but once I finish, I'm even more tired than before. Tony lends me his body for support yet again as we head to my room. A deep breath soothes me as we step in the doors and I just smell the normalcy of my old room. Tony makes sure I'm seated properly on the bed before pulling back.

"Uh, T? I'm...I'm sorry." I apologize only for Tony to shake his head.

"Nothing to be sorry for, kid. Get some rest." He leans forward and presses a kiss to my head before heading out. I sigh and lay back on my bed before shutting my eyes. Sleep takes me before I even have time to pull the blankets over me.

It's the middle of the night when I wake up with a jolt, but with no memory of what's making my heart race. My eyes quickly adjust to the dark and my brows furrow when I see a little blonde girl sitting on the floor beside my bed. I blink a few times but she doesn't disappear. She can't be older than ten. "Are you real?" I ask her softly and she nods. Well, that's something, I guess, and she does look familiar.

"The others said not to bother you yet, but I wanted to see you." She whispers and my brows furrow. Others?

"Shouldn't you be in bed?" I ask and her tiny pink lips pout.

"I can't sleep."

"That makes two of us then, doesn't it?" She smiles a bit at that as I rub a hand over my sleepy eyes. "I'm Grant." I introduce in the hopes that she'll tell me her name too and offer my hand. She takes it in hers and shakes once.

"Janie. Hi." Her blue eyes go to the handprint burn on my forearm and she frowns slightly. "Devon is still upset that you surprised him. Says it was unfair." She says and suddenly it dawns on me that this is the little girl in the first cage that we got out. I barely recognize her clean and with real clothes on, but now I can see it.

"That's alright. Suppose it was a bit unfair." I allow and she shrugs. "How are you doing, Janie?" She thinks about the question while still holding onto my hand, turning it to see the moonlight over the marks and scars on my wrist.

"I'm okay. It's very comfy here and there's good food and everything." She says and it's cute. Reminds me a bit of Sarah, Victory and Steve's daughter.

"That's good. What about your parents?" She deflates at that and I instantly know the answer. "That's okay." I assure her instantly as her big eyes look up to me.

"I was in a home before he found me. I thought...I thought it was going to be okay." Her blue eyes well up and my hand in hers now holds onto her tiny fingers.

"It'll be okay now, alright?" I'm pushed to comfort her just as I'd be pushed to comfort Victory, Liya, or Pepper's kid. My hand lifts and wipes away a few tears that have leaked out as she sniffles.

"You got us all out, but you had to stay." Her eyes go back to my wrists as I take a deep breath. "Thank you." She whispers and I blink at the unexpected words.

"I...yeah. Of course, kid." I allow before she turns and leans back against the bed with my hand still in her lap.

"I was wondering if I could stay here a little while?" She questions tentatively. I think on it for a second before nodding.

"Sure. Why don't you drag that chair over and settle down there?" My chin flicks to the chair a few feet away and only then do I get my hand back for a few moments as she stands up. She holds a hand out to the chair and soft green light fills the room as it wraps around the seat to drag it over next to me. Then she happily settles into it and after I hand her a blanket off my bed, she reclaims my hand. At least that answers what abilities she has.

"Goodnight, Grant." She bids after tucking my blanket around her and keeping my hand in her lap as if it were her favorite teddy bear. I half-smile.

"Night." I fall asleep faster than before.

When I wake up this time, it's morning and there's no one in my room but me. The chair is still out of place and has my blanket on it which brings a near smile to my face as I get up. I feel better today. More alive. However, wearing this hospital gown is not filling me with confidence. I'm trying to think of some way to circumvent the thing when there's a metallic knock on my door that can only mean one person. Bucky steps in and smiles when he sees me already up.

"Nice outfit." He comments instantly and my lips twitch. "Brought you something that might be a bit better. Change, then you're coming with me." He tosses the blue and black cloth onto the bed before ducking back out. I consider the cloth another moment before practically ripping the gown off in deference to it. My burns don't nearly sting as much today and are more skin than flesh. The new outfit Bucky gave me is a sort of tunic once again only with one shoulder, but the fabric drapes over my chest and to my knees in a much more dignified way. The layers are also good for the chillier fall weather outside which is apparently where we're going.

"You could've worn one too for solidarity." I tease as we step outside and he hands me a warm mug of coffee.

"Sorry, you're wearing my only one." He returns with a smirk as we start to walk slowly around the facility. "How are you?" He asks and I shrug my good shoulder while taking a small sip of the warmth. It feels better to be outside than I had expected and there's a peace to just taking it in without other people. Except Bucky, anyway.

"Better." I respond honestly and glance to his blue eyes that seem bluer in the early morning light. "How are you doing now that you don't hold the market on physical deformation?" He nearly spits up his coffee as he laughs, then shakes his head at me.

"I think a whole limb still wins, bee."

"Eh, maybe not if we're talking pure surface area." I chuckle as Bucky shoves me.

"Smartass." He comments with a wide grin as we continue walking on. "But it took me a long time to get over this thing." His arm whirs and slides then quiets. "Wouldn't be surprised if it took you a while too." Those eyes are cool and nonjudgmental as he looks at me. That's one of the best things about talking with Bucky; he never judges you for anything.

"I'm not a huge fan of having physical reminders of shit memories, but it's not exactly the first time." I turn one of my wrists this way and that to showcase the old scars with the new marks.

"But not just the physical are harmful." My eyes snap to his as I stop in my tracks.

"Did Tony say something to you?" I ask and he shakes his head.

"Stark doesn't need to say anything to me about this for me to know it, Grant. Come on." His tone is no nonsense and snaps me out of my defensive state. I sigh and run a hand through my curls as we keep walking.

"And you don't need to tell me about that either. I've been through all this before only I was fourteen and hated everybody."

"Tempted to remind you that you denied dealing with it at fourteen, then imploded at eighteen which prompted the rest of us to make you deal with it."

"Right, and that's not you reminding me."

"Grant." I sigh again and stop as he turns to face me. His brows raise and I know what he's asking even without him asking it.

"I'm fine." I tell him and now his expression turns skeptical.

"Now, I know that's a lie because no one would be fine after going through what you've been through. Try again." He says and waits with his hands on his hips. A position, I'd gathered, that he taught to Steve before Steve was Cap. I hand him my coffee mug with a straight smile.

"Fine. I'm a fucked up son of a bitch who doesn't want to talk about it." Then I head back the way we came as he sighs behind me.

*A/N*
Heyyyyy everybody.😬 How are we doing? Not having a mental breakdown over this book? Great! Let's go on then.😉