TAE POV:

There's the scent of sweet floral syrupiness that seeps into the room, muted down and softer. Not as overpowering and intoxicating. Not demanding on my senses but heady and strong enough that it had my head turning, it has my head jerking up because I remembered that scent. Knew that scent. Had smelt it very faintly, had chased after a very weak strain of it.

But now. Now it crashed into the room, seeping alongside ours and merging. Fully bloomed floral sweetness that had my head straightening from where it was draped against Kookie's shoulder, eyes turning towards the door where the scent emanated from. 

And my gaze came to settle on a shaky figure trembling in the doorway. Figure caved and drooped and so, so exhausted. I feel the room stiffen, everyone straightening up with alarm and distress at the sight of her that yanks at my instincts, demands that I soothe the poor shaky doe.

I jerk upright, back stiff as I watch (Y/N) stagger forward, hand curling onto the arm of a vacant armchair to drag herself closer, eyes shadowed and face thinner than I remembered it. Cheeks having lost some of that natural softness, features seeming sharper because of it, eyes seeming to pop out, large doe-eyes that were steeped with pain and hurt and determined resolve. I see the sweat of exertion making her skin clammy, see the way her legs give a violent jittery shudder as she drags herself upright, looking at us.

And it's instinctive that my body shoots off the sofa, staggering to stand at the sight of her, eyes roving over her. She was so, so drained. So lost and swallowed up in the jumper she wore, figure hidden within it. But the weakness radiating off her, the shakiness to her posture had me alarmed, had a distressed sound slipping free even as I feel the side of Kookie's arm brush against mine. Also jolting up at the sight.

He lets out a shuddery exhale beside me, her name breathed out as he stares, eyes wide and shocked. A glance to the side reveals stiff perked up ears and his tail that twitches behind him.

Hobi hyung doesn't move. Stiff and unable to physically tug himself out of the seat, slumping back, ears curling and twisting and eyes frozen. Stuck on the sight of her even as they fill with pain.

And Jiminie. Jiminie who'd been curled up relaxed on Joon hyung's lap, for once settled. Soothed and at ease, the stillest and most calm he had been since he'd been thrown into a rut, vicious and merciless, jerks. Flails and writhes against the band of arms he'd been content to play with, the same arms he'd relaxed behind. Tugging and twisting to get free, tail swishing against Joon hyung's lap as his eyes widened. Taking her in. Drinking in every change, every expression, every detail and committing it to memory even as he moved to escape his hold.

Nostrils flaring as he breathed in her scent. Mellowed floral tones. Post heat pheromones. Drenched with hurt and distress and pain. Taking in the way she trembles as she looks at us.

My heart aches and yearns, legs stiff with the physical force of stopping myself at tearing closer to her to get to her. Unable to bear the sight of her standing there looking so frightfully alone.

"Namjoon move. Let me go. Let me go." Jiminie says, words both a panicked plea and fierce demand, twisting to be freed.

It reminds me of that moment of control when he'd snapped. When he'd snarled and jerked and growled to be let go, desperate to get to her, eyes lit with a frantic urgency for her. Remembered as he'd twisted and shaken and clawed, clawed to get to her. Remembered how other times he'd sobbed and pleaded, eyes glassy and devastated, hurting that he couldn't get to her. That he'd get close to the sound of her whimpers and cries of pain and be jerked back. Unable to close that final stretch of distance, unable to cross the barrier of the door barring the two of them from each other.

And yet it wasn't the same.

It was different.

I saw how this time it was different. It wasn't that manic need to get to her in response to her heat pheromones. This time it was a plea to get to her because she was out of heat, because he wanted to tend to her where he couldn't before. Because he wanted to hold her. Simply be there for her.

Saw how much he needed this. On every instinctual level.

(Y/N)'s eyes warring with pain and hurt, with guilt flickering there too suddenly flood with relief, profound and overwhelming, legs buckling as her body gives up, crumpling towards the ground. No energy left in her limp body, a keening whine ripped out of his lips and then the hands go slack.

He wrenches himself forward, rushing through that space between them, hands catching her and drawing her figure towards him before she falls to the ground, arms tight and secure and fiercely protective as they wound around her, cradle her close.

"I've got you. I'm not letting go." He promises.

Shaky whisper carrying through the silence.

There's the sound of a small sniffle, muffled and wavering and if possible his hands tighten, curved around her back protectively, head curled close, a small sad whine as he noses at her cheek, flushed with the fever just breaking, murmuring softly to her as her own hands shaky and jittery reach up to grip tightly at the back of his shirt, fisting into the material. Unable to let go. Unwilling to let go of him as she burrows close.

I see how Joon hyung's face slackens, surprise colouring his features from when he'd automatically let go, automatically had responded to the distressing sound by letting go, eyes wide and posture so, so still as he watches Jiminie scoop her close.

See how Yoongi hyung's eyes widen, body jerking forward immediately but stilling where he sat when he sees that Jiminie just cradles her, just clutches frantically at her. That this isn't that need he'd shown days ago, a carnal want for her. This was a hurting fox needing to get to her. 

And then Jin hyung and Yoongi hyung are moving, detaching from their initially curled up postures to hastily move forward, careful as they approach Jiminie. Not knowing how he'll react, how he'll respond.

"Sweetheart let's get you two sitting down." Jin hyung says softly, voice soothing and wings untucking from against his back to flap, magnificent black wings stretching out briefly, rustled feathers, as he carefully braces a hand on the low of Jiminie's back.

He stiffens, hands tightening before the tension bleeds out, nodding as he raises his head. Careful as he takes careful notice of      (Y/N).

"Can you walk?" he asks softly.

And I know the answer before she gives it. Knows she can't but she'll stubbornly nod.

Silly girl.

And when true to my thoughts she gives a trembling nod, she carefully walks as Jiminie guides her backwards to the couch, still holding onto her as they take small steps.

Her legs jitter and shake, uncoordinated and stiff and wobbly, trembling with exertion as she walks. The frowns are clear on everyone's faces, Joon hyung hovering fitfully behind them as he rushes forward, snapped out of his frozen state to try and help.

Even Jiminie notices, fangs poking at his bottom lip as he stops.

"(Y/N) you can't walk...just let me..." he says, worrying his lip as he carefully winds his arms lower, bending to scoop her up when she shakes her head vehemently, hand gripping his shoulder and tugging at the fabric, drawing him back up.

"I can do it." She insists. Walking forward, legs so stiff, so so stilted as she takes steps and this time when her legs buckle and he yelps, rushing to slide an arm around her waist and draw her up, his expression is alarmed and frustrated. Worried as he looks at her.

A long drawn-out sigh, his body trembling slightly as he rolls his shoulders. Trying to push away his tension that simmers away, drawn out because it had been days since any of us had seen her. And the first thing that was glaringly obvious was how weak she was.

My tail swishes back and forth, quick as it tracks their movements, fidgetiness making me shift my weight from foot to foot, clutching at Kookie's hand and leaning into him.

And he's careful as he supports her, drawing her into him and taking painstakingly slow steps the final small stretch before he plops down onto the couch, immediately drawing her close. Tugging her carefully onto him, hands scooping her close and clutching at her as she winces and settles on his laps, posture loosening and slumping into him.

"You gave me a panic. I missed you so much." He murmurs, voice shaky as he clutches at her.

She doesn't speak. Remains silent as she curves close, exhaling as her head comes to settle slowly on his shoulder, a weak slow smile on her lips when her eyes meet mine. Sees the way I clutch at Kookie. Eyes glassy and damp, still clouded with the pain the heat had wrought on her.

"I didn't mean to. I'm sorry I went into heat." (Y/N) mumbles, voice coloured with guilt.

It tears at my heart. Jiminie's face turns spiked with alarm, distressed because that wasn't what he meant.

It wasn't what any of us wanted her to feel.

To feel guilt and shame over something she couldn't control.

"(Y/N) that wasn't your fault. It wasn't planned, these things happen." Hobi hyung insists, carefully setting down beside them and wriggling close. But so slowly. Careful to not disturb the balance of the two of them sitting together, careful to not cause the cushioning to dislodge their embrace. Fingers gentle as they reach to thumb at the tears that trickle out under shut eyelids, eyes having fluttered shut as they'd teared up.

Jiminie's posture had instinctively stiffened, easing out but eyes both wary and apologetic. Still being dominated by instinct even if he could recognise that none of us meant harm. Far from it. Even if every one of us cared for her, wanted her to be okay.

His face shutters, tucking her head under his even as he whispers it's okay. As long as she's okay it's all fine.

"But I could've stopped it. If I hadn't been stupid and forgotten the suppressants, if I'd just kept on track and not lost focus..." she whispers, voice aching with vulnerability.

"(Y/N) you're allowed to forget, you've gone through so, so much. You've been enduring with so many things that the stress and worry were undoubtedly triggers that threw you into such a short pre-heat." Joon hyung says, face miserable as he looks at Jiminie running his hands up and down her back, looking at her defeated slumped figure.

The tears trickle out heavier, half her face hidden away and tucked out of sight against his shoulder and she turns, completely hiding herself from view as she shakes. Weak trembling sobs and sniffles that are muffled against his chest, tears absorbed into fabric and not wiped away, body curling impossibly smaller.

Yoongi hyung's face is pinched and worried as he steps close, crouches down beside her, black tail curling behind him and ears twitching. Hand careful as it lightly touches her elbow to get her attention, looking so hesitant as if the slightest touch would bring her pain.

"(Y/N) this heat's been exhausting on you. Can you tell me exactly how you're feeling?" voice soft and imploring.

She turns towards the touch, cheeks stained with wet tears and eyes slightly hazy and unfocused, flickering with pain.

Lips opening and closing.

Silent.

But under hyung's gentle encouraging look, patient and waiting she confesses in a small whisper.

"Hurts. Everything hurts." A softly whispered admission of truth.

Eyes dropping as if ashamed to admit it.

And hyung's gentle and soft as he peeks, head ducking down to meet her lowered gaze.

"That's fine too. Makes sense. But we'll get you all the care and help you need." He promises.

Stands up and murmurs something about finally getting some food into her, stepping out with purpose and resolve making his tail swish, ears perked up.

Kookie fidgets beside me, a slight tapping of his foot against the carpet before he twists to face me.

"Hyung I want to help Yoongi hyung." He whispers.

I nod but it takes time for me to get my hands to cooperate and uncurl from around his arm and as he pads over to follow Yoongi hyung's black tail curling out of sight, I pad over to latch onto Hobi hyung instead, carefully sinking onto his lap and peering at her.

"I missed you at the centre. The kids did too. Everyone did." I say, leaning forward and watch as her eyes blink slowly at me.

A frown twisting her lips.

That's not what I wanted.

"Did you tell them Tae? Who phoned in my heat leave?" voice curious.

But it's so down. So hoarse and shaky and weak. Strained.

Because she'd spent the past five days sobbing and pleading and whimpering. I knew because everytime Yoongi hyung returned his face was pinched and creased with concern. Because he curled beside the two of us and held us close, protectively and frantically nuzzling and scenting. Because he was affected too whether or not he worded it from tightly pressed that lips that had smiled wide and gummy very rarely these past handful of days.

I give a small shake, gesturing my chin to Joon hyung who stands dithering and fretting, tail swishing with anxious energy.

"That was Joonie hyung. He phoned in your heat leave and he made sure Ji Ah and Min-Jun were always monitored by his trusted officers. Me and Hobi hyung stayed with Min-Junie lots, promise!" I say eagerly.

"Thank you Namjoon." Mumbled and slurred.

His tail quickens even if his eyes are darkened with concern. Trying to do something to help.

A rumbly growl to his words as he speaks that has her inexplicably calming, curling even further into the protective hold Jiminie has on her.

"Welcome (Y/N)."

And she quietens. Eyes fluttering as she relaxes, limbs loosening hips upwards as she leans against Jiminie. The two of them are tucked into a corner, his back pressed and reclined against the cushions, eyes alert as he holds her. His posture might be alert but his mint has sweetened out, light and gentle on the tongue. Intertwines and curls around her own sweet floral.

"I don't want to let you go you know. It's been days since I saw you but it feels like forever." Jiminie whispers, nosing along the top of her head, snuffling as he breathes her in.

Safe and whole. Protected.

Even if her scent was weighed down with pain, even if slight movements when Jiminie shuffled to straighten slightly had a whimper slipping out, body tensing and teeth biting down on her lip.

She was in pain.

But we'd do anything to lessen it.

-------

I see the grimace before hyung does. See the way she'd curled around in Jiminie's lap, carefully repositioned so she could set the tray down on her lap, because he'd refused to let go, refused to loosen his hold on her. I see the grimace as she swallows the mouthful of food, chewing lethargically and eyes dull as she eats. Tries to anyways.

And see how both Jin hyung and Yoongi hyung catch on the gesture, brows furrowing with concern.

"(Y/N) you've eaten mouthfuls at most at every odd meal. You need to regain your strength and lost nutrients." Jin hyung says, wings flapping restlessly even as his thumb rubs circles against Kookie's side who's own eyes are wide and watching, waiting for her to eat properly.

His words have Yoongi hyung nodding miserably even as alarm spikes in the rest of us, a discontented rumbly growl slipping out of Joon hyung's lips and a hiss of breath from Hobi hyung, hands tightening around me as I let out a small rumble. Sad.

Jimin's face scrunches, distress as he nudges against her side with his nose, lightly grazing at her jaw as he murmurs.

"Please try eat." He pleads.

Eyes wide and hurting as they trail over her more carefully, narrowing at the slightly sharper curve to her jaw, to the hollowed eyes. 

I can't quite bite back the whimper of distress. Her eyes rising to look at me, alarm flaring briefly in the agonised gaze in her eyes.

"You need to eat. Hybrids especially burn through a lot quicker. You're always on your feet and rushing and now you're all run down." I say, wriggling closer and carefully off Hobi hyung's lap to lightly nudge her bowl closer.

She gives a weary nod.

"I know...I just physically can't." she whispers, hushed and soft.

Ears flicking and bending slightly as she lowers her head.

"I'm hungry but it feels like I'll be sick if I eat." She admits.

Hand carefully lowering the spoon back, apologetic as she shoots Kookie, Jin hyung and Yoongi hyung a look, wide remorseful doe eyes.

"I really do like your cooking Jungkookie...it just won't settle." She says.

He musters a smile for her even as his lips waver and his nose scrunches.

Nodding even if his ears don't bounce and flop around his face but remain stiffened with concern.

"It's fine. Let me know if there's something you do want to eat. Promise." he insists.

"Promise." she echoes, the ghost of a smile in the way her lips try to quirk.

But Jimin's insistent. Nudging the water forward, eyes watchful as she easily latches onto it, sipping slowly at the straw, throat bobbing as she takes long gulps of it.

Parched. Undoubtedly soothing her poor sore throat.

His gaze remains focused on her even as he gently fixes the cushion she's leaning against, shifting it lower so she can recline more comfortably, hand hovering as if unsure where to settle first, what exactly to soothe first. Pained and tormented by the notion.

"You smell all sad." I whisper when she's drained the glass.

Seeing the way her throat continues to bob.

The floral tone had dampened even more, heavy and weighed down.

And she twists uneasily slightly, eyes darting a glance to me and ducking her head down when she realises everyone else is looking, that their gazes have settled on her.

"I've ruined so much haven't I? I...I heard the yells and growling and fighting. I did that didn't I?" she suddenly asks.

Voice burdened and scent taking a bitter, slightly damp scent, like flowers decaying.

It's as if her mind constantly keeps flitting back to her heat, unable to truly escape it, unable to relax despite it being over.

And though she'd asked a question, her face mournful and ashamed shows that she believes it.

Even if the growls and yells had been amongst us. Even if she hadn't been there physically she was blaming herself.

And her post-heat was making her more receptable to the slight changes in scent, posture stiffening when the mint sharpened and the earthiness rolled in heavier.

When it had the citrus turning a bit sour.

But the hand that carefully draws her face to look into the one of a deeply hurting regretful fox hybrid is gentle. Light as it cups her cheek, fingers rubbing at the edge of her cheek, eyes turning darker as he feels the loss of softness.

"That's on us. All on us. You haven't ruined anything." He reassures.

But I know it'll take more than just a few words to ease that away.

Know that it'll require her to come more out of post-heat first.

Not when she was still so vulnerable and hurting. Not when pain kept clouding her eyes.

"And we'll keep telling you that." I echo.

I'd do anything to see that churning mixture of guilt, pain and agony drain away from her wide expressive eyes.

Anything.

HOBI POV:

My heart twists when the tray gets pushed away, barely a dent made into the food though the glass had been refilled several times, drained under Jiminie's watchful gaze, her voice hoarse and rough as she mumbles an apology.

My heart aches because I can see she wants to eat but it's too sudden for her after going off only water and the odd mouthful here and there. But the way her cheeks were thinner, dark circles underlining reddened eyes and body kept trembling I knew just how much she was exhausted, how much she was trying to fight resting and falling asleep.

I knew that these past five days, that had stretched torturously long, were no less than hell on her body and mind. That she was emotionally and physically drained and even now she was fighting to stop her body from caving and from fully slumping in Jiminie's hold.

"I'm really sorry." She whispers as Yoongi hyung takes the tray but his face is sympathetic and knowing, voice a soft murmur as he reassures her.

"It's fine (Y/N), we can try again later. But is there something you need straight away?" I say.

She shifts on Jiminie's lap, wincing and failing to mask the way her expressions falters as pain flashes across her features. Curling close as if the embrace will banish every scrap of pain away.

His loose grip tightens, drawing himself close to her, impossibly closer to share the same space.

"A bath...a really hot bath." (Y/N) answers, face pinched as she tries to straighten, hand trembling as it reaches out for the arm of the sofa, trying to straighten up.

The wounded sound doesn't slip out of her but out of Jiminie as she tries to pull away, tucking himself closer against her back, eyes flashing with panic.

"Let me help you." he insists when she tries to drag herself off, hands wound around her waist as she wobbles, getting to her feet.

I bound off the sofa to stand in front of her, holding my hands out for her and smiling when she slides her hands into mine, silent gratitude in her eyes as I hold her hands and help draw her upright, supporting her front against me as Jiminie holds her from behind.

Her head leans to press against my shoulder, breathing heavier.

It makes me frown.

Would she be okay to have a bath?

What if she fell asleep in the bath?

"Hobi your scent..." (Y/N) mumbles.

And I realise it's gone sharper, taking on a burnt tinge with the worry.

"Will you be okay alone? You can barely move." I mumble.

My words make the mint sharpen too in response. Makes him nose at the back of her head with a worried expression, hands tighter around her waist, trying to draw her back into sitting, to draw her back down.

"It's just a bath. I want to...I want to wipe it all away." she whispers, achingly soft and hushed.

Her head doesn't rise from against my shoulder and when my hand slides to cup her cheek, it's warm and clammy to the touch.

The remaining dregs of heat fever still pulsing slightly.

Wants to wipe away the reminder of the five days she'd endured. Wanted to wipe away the exhaustion and fatigue and weariness from her skin. Wanted it to all melt away.

"(Y/N) how tired are you? Because if you want to sleep....sleep first." Joon says, eyes trying to gauge the depth of her exhaustion.

The thought of her falling asleep in the bath, of her head slipping or falling forward....it made my lungs tighten and clench.

"I can do it." She insists, head rising even as it curves towards my palm, eyes fluttering open to peer at me, turning slightly to pat Jiminie's hands around her.

But he doesn't let go. Doesn't let go and just scoops her up, carefully bending to draw her legs around him, cradling her towards his chest as he noses and buts against her cheek, nuzzling as he takes small careful steps out of the living room. His hands are secure and firm as they're wound around her.

Her head is on his shoulder and Joon follows me as I hover fitfully behind the two. Jiminie can't see it but I see the way her face has tightened with pain, expression shuttered as she bites down on her lip, legs tight and stiff.

Joon lets out a small sad rumble, hand reaching out for her but she shakes her head, noticing the movement, wincing when she moves her legs.

It made me feel failed looking at her paining, at her hurting and all of us being able to do nothing.

"Jimin-ah, bring her here." Jin hyung voice calls from the nearest bathroom and when he steps through, the rest of us dithering in the hallway it's to see hyung had stepped away to draw her a bath. 

Sleeves rolled up and arms wet as he turns, wings flapping and gesturing to the closed toilet seat to set her down, fretting when she clutches at the sink and blinks up at him. 

"I'll check up on you after a while just to make sure. I don't want you to feel as if your space is invaded but can you leave the door unlocked in case?" he asks softly.

The fact that she nods and gives in easily makes me wonder just how much she thinks it's likely too, her expression warming slightly, eyes abashed when they drop away from the doorway when she senses us standing there.

"That's settled then. I've added some bath salts and perfumed scents that should help. If you need anything give a call." He says, nudging Jiminie along who dithers, feet dragging as he stares morosely at the sight of her sitting alone. Unwilling to step away from flanking her.

"Jimin-ah, I know you want to stay but let's let her relax a bit. She'll be right back when she's done." Jin hyung soothes.

He makes a small, distressed chirp, eyes wide and pleading.

Allowing himself to be tugged along even if he lingers and loiters, each step slow and unwilling.

Her posture's drooped, curled in on itself but she gives a small smile when Jiminie asks if she'll be okay.

"I'll be fine." A promise. A reassurance.

But before Jin hyung steps out fully he turns to her.

"Am I allowed to head in to get you some clothes or would you rather we don't?" he adds.

Unwilling to broach that space that had been solely hers. The same space she'd confined herself to for her heat. A space her instincts would've called a nest.

"It's fine. You can. Thank you Jinnie." She whispers.

Fiddling with the sleeves of the jumper.

And just before the door swings shut, I catch the final sight of her clutching at the sink to draw herself up. See how she trembles to do so.

And when it clicks shut, I can't help but wonder whether she'd be okay.

------

The time it takes (Y/N) to bathe has everyone tense and worried. Has ears trained towards the doorway in case she needs something, in case the slightest sound is out of place. It has Jin hyung perched on the corner of a sofa, stiff and ready to rush if he needs to, wings restlessly moving against his back, flapping and tucking themselves back in.

There's a restless quiet as Jiminie frets in the corner, legs jogging up and down as he clutches a cushion, trying to compensate for the loss of her in his arms, grip tight. Tae's burrowed against Yoongi hyung, almost compulsively scenting against his jaw and throat, small sad rumbles slipping out and stripey tail drooped. 

Joon's leaning against me, slumped and tired, shadowed eyes flickering up to the doorway every now and then, fingers fiddling as he draws shapes onto my leg, his tail restlessly thumping.

And Kookie approaches Jiminie, quietly sinks beside him and worms his way under his arm, tucked up against him, ears drooped as he tugs at his hand. It diverts his attention as he turns to our bunny packmate, a shaky smile that doesn't reach his eyes as he reaches over to slide an arm around him and tuck him closer, more securely.

The same two who'd been thrown into vicious ruts of their own now banded close for comfort, for chasing tactile closeness. And Jiminie curves protectively around him, nosing at his jaw and drawing his wrist into his hands to brush across the glands with featherlight touches.

Jin hyung had quietly slipped away to her room, returning a while later with something simmering in his eyes and lips drooped, carrying a bundle of clothes that still sat in his lap now as he fiddled with them. His wings also hadn't stopped twitching sense, as if whatever he'd found was still playing about in his mind.

And there's a tentative call that has him bolting, rushing out the room without a glance back, clothes gathered towards his chest. Jiminie follows a heartbeat behind him, rushing as his tail swishes quickly behind him, soft orange quickly moving behind him as he vanishes out into the hallway.

They both return with (Y/N) in tow. Her legs jitter even though Jiminie's scooped her back up, the side of her body pressed against his chest, head tucked on his shoulder even if her eyes are open, lips parted as she breathes shakily.

And then he's setting himself down carefully, manoeuvring her on his lap, bodies pressed close as he winds his arms around to draw her close to lean against him. Silent as she caves forward and slumps, a look of frustration on her face that's hidden from sight when she burrows herself against his chest.

The residual sweetness isn't as strong now. Post-heat pheromones still seeping out but body enveloped into a mixture of scents. She smells like Yoongi hyung's bodywash. The thought that she'd unknowingly chosen his has me smiling a bit. He did always smell nice and soothing. Something light on the senses.

"Are you okay (Y/N)?" Kookie asks wriggling closer a bit.

No reply.

Silence as she remains still in Jiminie's arms, scent seeping off her.

He shoots a nervous look at her curled-up figure, towards us. Silently fretting. Her head is bent inwards, face hidden as she slumps against Jiminie, who's own head is bent to whisper softly to her, the brown ears peeking out from damp strands of hair flickering and registering the sound. 

But she silently reaches out, twisting to take Kookie's hand and squeeze his as she trembles.

She's almost so still that I almost mistake it for her having fallen asleep but her legs give the occasional jolt and tremble and her head curves even more, trying to make herself smaller, fingers clutching at his shirt to tuck herself closer.

"I think we should call her packmates. They should know what to do to help her through her post-heat." Tae speaks up, voice low and quiet. More hushed than I've ever heard it.

Sombre as he shoots her a longing glance. Undoubtedly wanting to do something for her.

A flash of memory curls around my mind.

Remember how eager and determined Tae had been as he told me was going to be the perfect substitute for her packmates, mentioning he knew from sticky notes the sort of things to do for her. Remembered how this past week he'd been so droopy whenever he saw her office shut, when she didn't join either of us for work.

Remember how he'd missed her regular presence.

It's Kookie who fumbles for his phone, pressing quickly as he brings it to his ear.

Foot tapping against the carpet as he waits for the phone to connect, eyes scanning over us, settling on Jin hyung and relaxing slightly.

"Turn it on speaker." Tae insists, eyes pleading.

And the phone connects. An exhausted voice calling out.

"Kookie hyung? I was meaning to call you..." a voice comes out, filling the silence.

"Binnie...you sound exhausted." Kookie says, calling out worriedly, eyes trained on the screen, momentarily distracted.

There's the sound of rustling and a door being open and shut before he speaks again.

"Eunwoo hyung's rut's been draining. It's worse because noona isn't here...." He says softly.

I wince.

"Bin-ah...(Y/N)'s just gone through her heat too. It was a sudden one and it's been...brutal." Kookie hedges carefully, drawing himself away from the couch to pad closer, having seen the way her ears curled and tried to shield themselves from the noise.

I see the way Jiminie's hand carefully brushes across the back of them and soothes her, whispering low.

"Is noona okay?" the voice is shaky and worried.

"She's gone silent. And she keeps trembling." Tae speaks up, crowding close to the phone as he slips away from Yoongi hyung.

Her packmate doesn't startle at the new voice, just gives a shaky sigh.

"That'll be the aches. Her legs are always the worst after a heat but she keeps insisting on walking around. Her legs and hips lock up during a heat. Massage oils and heat pads should help ease away the pain." He says.

I see Joon scrabble for something to write on, a bit clumsy as he tugs open a notebook, fingers fumbling for a pen. Mumbling it to himself.

"Leg massages and heat pads." 

"She's lost a lot of nutrients but she's not eating either." Jin hyung says, piping up as he leans his head close.

There's the sound of a soft low voice joining, of something shifting and a soft murmur of hyung.

Her other packmate. The buck.

"Bin-ah you should've told me, I felt you leave." Is the voice soft and chiding slightly, rough and hoarse too.

"Kook-ah, Jin hyung I'm sorry. We should've realised, (Y/N)'s heat suppressed or not always syncs to my ruts."

My gaze drifts over the others, sees comprehension flash in Yoongi hyung's eyes, see the way Jiminie's arms tighten, head burrowing closer as he nuzzles at the top of her head. Realise that (Y/N) was in heat here but Eunwoo was also going through a rut. Just as bad given the exhaustion in their voices. Possibly their first heat and rut separated from each other even if they're not mates.

"She likes warm sweet drinks, hot chocolate always helps. And she's more likely to snack than she is to sit down to eat properly. So energy bars should help." Eunwoo contributes.

I see Joon's hand frantically move, mumbling the words once more.

"Hot chocolate and energy bars." As he jots it down, eyes glued to the phone in Kookie's hand.

"Is there anything else? Her voice is weak and she won't speak." Jin hyung asks.

Eyes flitting to look at her as if to reassure himself she's fine. She's there.

"She likes low voices. Likes listening more than speaking in her post-heat, so just talking to her will help soothe her. It makes her feel safe, helps her sleep easier." Eunwoo adds.

His voice trembles. My ears catch onto the small murmur of reassurance from Moonbin. 

Eunwoo's undoubtedly feeling helpless in being unable to help. To have his packmate who his body is so perfectly attuned to, to have suffered alone.

"Suga!" Moonbin suddenly interjects, voice closer as if he's leaning in towards the phone.

I blink. Head automatically rising to look at Yoongi hyung.

His black ears twitch, expression confused and startled at being named.

"Suga's voice helps, she always listens to his shows a lot." Moonbin elaborates.

"Did you say Suga? The DJ? Late night show?" I question. Needing to clarify.

"Yes, his voice is one of the only ways to get her to sleep during cycles. It makes her feel safe and protected. So cuddles and low voices do that for her." Eunwoo adds.

My gaze rises to focus on hyung. Who looks startled and frozen, black fluffy ears perked up and tail still and staring wide-eyed at the phone, unblinking.

Joon who'd been jotting it down, mumbling Suga under his breath stills. Tail thumping against a cushion as his eyes wide turn to face hyung too. Pen still.

"Just take care of noona. She's a stubborn one. Walks around as if her legs won't buckle at any moment, it gives her literal jitters to move around after her heats." Binnie insists.

Worried and panicked and fretting.

But then it turns apologetic when a low pained groan comes through, murmuring an urgent apology that he needs to help Eunwoo. His rut cycle spiking at hearing (Y/N)'s own situation. 

Then the phone is cut.

Cuddles. Massages. Hot chocolate. Voices. Suga.

My head falls back, a small sigh escaping.

"Looks like you're the best bet in getting her to relax then." I say, head rising to glance at hyung.

Joon's still gawping. Lips parted as he stares at hyung.

As if he's the answer for all of this.

Watch as Jin hyung gives a small poke to his side to get him to snap out of it.

"Work your magic then Suga."

(Y/N) POV:

There's safety in Jiminie's arms.

Inexplicable warmth and this innate sense of safety and security. Of protection and refuge. A sanctuary.

And something so calming about the mint seeping off him, sweet and light and fresh. Filtering through the fog of sweet anise to brush into my lungs, breathing a little easier because of him. 

It was so easy to fold myself into his arms, to curl into his embrace, so relieved when he'd been there, holding me close, promising he was here as my legs buckled, gave up on me. And unlike my heat, his mint hadn't slipped away, had remained as he held me, nosing along my cheeks and snuffling, a small whimpery chirp when I'd shifted and it had made pain flare up in my body.

I didn't want to be weak but when he held me, when he promised he had me, it felt like it was okay to be. That I didn't have to hide the way my body jittered and sparked with agony at the slightest of movements.

The pain gnawed at me from the inside, tugging at my stomach, at every limb when I shifted, back protesting when I shifted to get comfortable but his hands remained, his hold remained firm and promising around me, drawing me closer and closer until no space remained between us, until I could feel the heat of his body wind around me, pushing away the heat that lingered in my veins slowly seeping out.

But as content as I feel in his arms, in his embrace and tucked close, small, protected, looked after, I feel my heart twist with agony and guilt, voice shaking as I apologise, wanting to let the sorrys to continue streaming off my tongue with how many things I was ashamed for.

Sorry for going into heat.

Sorry for needing this.

Sorry for turning the pack upside down with my pheromones.

Sorry for being so weak.

Sorry for forgetting.

Sorry that I needed this closeness, was desperate for it. Had yearned for it every moment of my heat.

I felt sorry that yet again I was staring down at a tray but unable to rouse the appetite to eat, even if my stomach gnawed at me from the inside with hunger. I wanted to. The smell was appealing, enticing, didn't make my stomach twist but when I carefully took a bite, it tasted like sawdust, turned to cardboard into my mouth.

I knew rationally that I'd lost a lot of nutrients and energy during my heat, knew that my body was crumbling and caving. That it needed to be built back up. Needed to regain what it had lost, all that energy in shifting to get away from the pain, to escape from it.

But I couldn't eat. Wanted to. Knew I needed to.

And felt an apology sitting on my lips when I saw how hopeful Jungkook had been as he'd set the tray onto my lap, fidgeting and waiting.

Felt it spill past my lips when I saw how Yoongi couldn't disguise the way his scent sharpened as he took the tray back, as Jiminie nudged the glass to my lips trying to urge me to drink more.

It felt like no matter how much I drank my throat remained parched, remained rough and hoarse. As if the days of screaming and pleading and crying wouldn't be quite erased so easily. The heat wouldn't just vanish from my veins even if that breeding urge had quietened after being left unsatisfied.

My head ducks at the whimper of distress Tae makes, eyes meeting his but tucking myself smaller because I couldn't do things right.

I was making things difficult again.

Feel my eyes sting when Jimin's nose brushing against my cheek, trying to nudge me into eating, mumbling that I needed to.

"I know...I just physically can't." I mumble.

Feeling the words stick to my throat, hard to force them out.

Hard to speak when I wanted nothing more than the world to all melt away for a bit, to turn soft and warm and gentle on every sense that still felt hyper aware.

There was nothing more I wanted than to sink into Jiminie's embrace and curl away, to finally fulfil those long denied tactile instincts that had begged and thrashed to be looked after, that had sobbed as my hands had curled into empty sheets, cries muffled into the pillows.

But when they ask if I need anything, I know I want to scrub away the reminder of the past five days off my body.

That I still felt clammy, sticky and tight in my own body. That I wanted to scour away the way my scent clung to me, dizzyingly strong.

A bath.

But when I try to draw myself up, insistent on doing this myself, Jiminie's already plastered to my back, arms around my waist as he supports me, stepping up with me. Hobi slips in front, hands held out towards me, waiting for me to take them, to accept the help myself.

I remember his promise, his reassurance that I was allowed to be weak in front of him, that he'd help me, shield me from it all.

And gratefully slide my hands into his, tucked between the two, breathing in his scent, sweet caramel. Surprised when it takes a sharp burnt tinge to it when he asks if I'll be okay to bathe alone.

Whether I'd be able to support myself.

But the thought of letting the days cling to me for any longer had my body repulsed and curling into myself. Bath. I needed that bath.

But before I can take a step forward myself, legs sore and protesting at my standing up, only kept upright by the two bodies that supported me, I'm being carefully scooped up, body winding around the firm solid one that holds me, legs loosely locked around a waist as I'm carried out to the bathroom.

My legs spasm and shake at the jolt the steps send through my body, aching and trembling, feeling as if each muscle was on fire, being tugged and strained beyond use. Shake my head when Namjoon's hands dart out, biting back the whimper and hiding away.

Slowly set down onto the lowered toilet seat, clutching at the sink to stop the way my body sways as my head spins, feeling Jiminie's body as a line of heat curved beside me.

My heart aches when Jin explains he's added salts to the bath, arms wet and wings flapping, face creased with worry. Crumbles a little when he asks painstakingly soft if the door can be kept unlocked in case I need help.

Nodding and head bowing to try and hide the way my eyes teared up.

I could do that.

But when the door closes behind me I let myself crumple. Let it slump towards the sink, head curved over it, sweat beading at the exertion of standing leaning against it as I tug my clothes off. It takes far too much effort to learn how my body works, to try and get it to cooperate with my pleading mind as I bend to draw the shorts off my legs, wincing when the fabric brushes too roughly against skin. Staggering towards the bath, clutching onto the side of the wall to clamber in, one foot lowered into heated scented water and then the other, slowly lowering myself down as I grip at the edges of the tub to sink down.

My head slumps against the edge of the tub, resting not against the cold hard rim of it but instead a soft towel that had been bundled up into a roll to support my neck.

The heat of the water leeches away at the warmth still buzzing in my veins, at the dredges of it that still make my body throb. An unfulfilled heat.

Feel the warmth of the water lap at my sore body, to try and get stiffened muscles to relax and melt, body slumping and sinking more into the tub, sloshing around me before it comes to settle as I shift to get comfortable.

And lose myself in the soft scents, light and gentle. Feel my eyes grow leaden and heavy as the water drags at my skin, tugging and coaxing it to be cocooned in its heat, body turning to sludge, uncoordinated limbs turning lax.

My eyes begin to flutter as I relax, head slipping slightly off the edge of the towel, body kickstarting into alertness when I nearly careen into the water, sinking into its inviting depths, hands curling on the edges to drag myself back up, wincing at the low tug at the base of my back when I jerk upright. Draw myself up on leaden limbs to drag myself upright, draining the bath as I stand.

My head presses against the cool tiled wall, cooling the flush on my cheeks as I fumble to shower off, hand reaching for one of the lighter scented bodywashes.

Something soft and soothing about the light musk scent that sluices away and replaces the lingering sweetness I can still smell overwhelmingly. Jin had left towels within reach and when I dry myself off afterwards, it's with a bit of that pain leeched away, tugged away by whatever he'd mixed into the waters.

But my eyes blur, blinking away dark spots in my vision as I clamber out, feet fumbling for steadiness.

The door's still closed and I slowly make my way over, clutching at the handle.

Tentatively calling out for Jin because I needed clothes.

But he comes immediately.

Almost as if he'd been waiting.

A light knock before I twist the door open, his hand holding out the clothes for me before he gently closes the door.

Dressing is a pain. A nuisance. I end up sitting on the edge of the tub to draw the clothes onto my body, feeling too exhausted and tired to be embarrassed that Jin had walked in and seen the discarded sheets, had undoubtedly smelled my pheromones cloying and sweet, had seen the stripped away nest.

The clothes he's chosen are light and loose.

Have me sighing with relief when they don't cling to me, don't stick to skin that felt prickly and sensitive. Wincing when drawing my damp hair out of the neckline has my fingers grazing against the too sensitive scent gland on my wrist, swollen and prominent, still seeping out anise.

Take a few minutes to regulate my breathing, dressing had exhausted me, curling to lean against the door as I draw in large gulps of air, clothes carefully put into the laundry basket before I step out.

Startled but so soothed by the sight of both Jin and Jiminie waiting outside.

Watch as black wings flap and tuck when Jin sees me and Jiminie silently steps forward to scoop me close, scenting at my cheek as he carefully draws me against him once more.

The protest that had been on my lips die out when I see the silent reprimand in sharp eyes that soften as they settle on me, a rumbled chirp that warns me to drop it. And behind him, over his shoulder I see Jin relax as he sees me being held, giving me an encouraging nod.

Trailing behind me, eyes unwavering as they fix on me.

Feel other gazes join his when Jiminie once more settles with me on his lap, embrace warm and soothing.

And helpless to the soft warmth he imbues, I go down, curving close and unable to stop myself from tucking into him, against him, head curved towards his throat as I let my eyes flutter shut.

Content to just sit there, let the world fade to darkness, voices a low background murmur as I sink further and further.

"Are you okay (Y/N)?" Jungkook whispers softly.

But as if all my strings have been cut, I slump, unable to drag myself away from the source of sweet light mint brushing against my nose, tickling and teasing. But I also don't want him to worry, don't any of them to be concerned, twisting to reach out with my hand for his, squeezing lightly.

Energy drained when I feel him reciprocate the touch, sighing when Jiminie whispers.

"It's okay to let go (Y/N). Just relax for me." breath a warm whisper against the ears peeking up from damp strands of hair.

Slowly drooping and giving in to what his voice urges and guides me to do, his fingers light as they rub up and down the curve of my spine, darting to brush knuckles against the back of my ears, flicking against the touch, body unravelling and loosening further at the light tactile touch.

The world spins out of reach, everything narrowing down to just Jimin.

To his touches light and gentle, to his voice a low soothing whisper as he holds me, nudges me to relax and let go, instincts all loopy and hazed, recognising his scent, his presence as predator, as larger, safer, as protector.

Lulled by the soft whispers and light grazing fingers across my ears, calming my sensitive nerves, easing me into a relaxed state, completely trusting him, knowing I'm safe with him.

Not knowing how much time passes tucked away within him, not knowing or being able to register anything beyond the low hum of voices that make me drowsier, make me relax even more, body calming down under the combined voices that talk quietly.

Not knowing anything beyond this darkness that is warm, safe, nurturing and kind.

A relief. A reprieve.

Breathing not as rough as I inhale calm sweet mint, head tucked into the crook of Jiminie's neck, close to his scent gland.

Mind pleasantly fogged by the constant scent seeping off him.

Letting go was nice.

And as he soothed and reassured me I felt my body grow heavier, grip on his shirt loosening and head sinking down more securely against him.

It felt like I was floating, body loose.

Unable to let go fully because of the pain that still prickled across my skin, hips twinging when he drew me close.

And when a pained cry tore out, muffled against his throat when I stretched my leg out, the voices faded, quietened.

The low hum melted away and out of reach.

That slip over the edge was stopped, tugged back suddenly.

And though I clenched my eyes shut tight, it didn't quite stop the tears from trickling down, escaping under shut eyelids.

------

"(Y/N)...oh sweet girl, it's okay. Can you turn for me?" the voice coaxes.

A low soothing rumble.

I knew that voice. I loved the warmth and reassurance that voice had failingly brought.

And tugged to it, drawn time and time and time again. Helpless to it even know as I slowly turn my head away from the darkness, from the constant source of mint to blink at the figure settled beside us.

See as Yoongi sits close, hands curled around a mug, wisps of steam rising up and curling around his face, smell the scent of chocolate, liquid and warmth tease as he lifts the mug holding it out towards me.

"Made you something to drink. I even used real chocolate and the treats I never give to Tae." He whispers conspiratorially. Lips quirking to show a flash of gums and slight fangs when it elicits a huffed protest from somewhere behind me.

"He gets all hyperactive kitty on us." he adds. Watches as my lips dredge up at the corners.

Slowly peeling myself off Jiminie to straighten up, lips wobbling when my hips flare with pain and see his eyes narrow.

Even as he waits for Jiminie to help draw me up, eyes foggy and hazed too as his hands support me, hold onto me as I reach for the mug, uncurling to lean against one side instead.

Fingers latching onto the warmth and breathing in the scent of the warm drink.

Smiling at the mound of cream and marshmallows, at the chocolate sticks in it. So generously topped up.

I draw it to my mouth, lips setting onto the rim of the cup to take a small sip, surprised when no drink comes into my mouth, cream and marshmallows slipping in.

A finger wipes the tip of my nose, Jiminie's gaze fond as he looks at me.

I relax as the mug seeps out heat to my fingers, relaxing as I curl around my hands around my comfort drink.

I don't know how Yoongi knows but his gaze is warm and fond as he watches me pluck the marshmallows and chocolate, nibbling away at them, teeth sinking into sweetness that melts across my tongue.

"Can I try something (Y/N)?" he asks.

Drawing my gaze away from the mound of toppings and cream that still remain to look at him.

Nod at the hopeful expression on his face.

And flinch when he draws my legs away from their curled-up posture to draw across his lap instead, across the cushion he sets down.

Reaching for something that Tae hurries to pass over, a small bottle, stripey tail swishing with purpose before he sinks down beside him, smiling at me with wide eyes. Scent sweet but tart strawberries.

Watch as he uncaps the bottle, warming the oil he pours onto his hands before they hover over my calves.

And then they settle.

Large warm fingers rubbing at the side of my calves, applying pressure as he begins to knead and massage at my legs, coaxing out the stiffness and tension in my muscles and easing them away.

My eyes flutter at the sensation, a small, relieved groan slipping out as my head falls back, legs turning to putty as he continues to knead at my legs, fingers trailing to the back of my calves as he squeezes lightly, hands trailing higher.

I wriggle close to the touch even as my body slumps, turning to jelly as he continues to knead at the tension, legs jolting with the endorphins beginning to rush through my body, relaxing under his careful expert ministrations.

And as he massages he begins to talk, talking about the mundane, about the sort of things that happened in the past five days. Talks about Hobi being a bit nervous to go into work alone for once, for having to work with a different supervisor- ignoring the indignant 'hyung' he gets in response, talks about how there's countless baked treats stored in both kitchens because Jin had been trying out new recipes this week. Stops to encourage me to keep drinking.

"It'll get cold (Y/N). It won't be hot chocolate anymore. And besides...I can see Tae trying to inch forward for it." He teases, hand tugging at a stripey ear lightly before his hands return, watching me blink, sluggishly moving and trying to draw the mug close, a hand reaching to help me, drawing it to my lips as I take sips.

It's warm and sweet, soothing as it slips down my throat. Richer too.

Maybe I'll have to ask for his recipe for it.

And he continues to ease knots of tension out of my body as he talks, about the sort of things he saw from his bedroom window, about the way Namjoon keeps talking to the bonsai as he waters it. About all sorts of things.

It's hard to remember to keep sipping as Yoongi talks.

Because his voice has always meant warmth for me. Has always been so soothing and safe. Always tugging at my wearied and often suppressed instincts and drawing them out in full force, soothing that need to feel small and protected.

And now it's magnified. There's something that's like liquid warmth dripping from his tongue as he speaks, fingers careful as they apply pressure inching higher and turning my legs into an unmoveable mess, putty moulded under his touch. And with each sip I feel that warmth chip away at the pain, drawing me to sag against Jiminie.

"Keep drinking sweet girl." Yoongi encourages.

I soften further.

Fuzzy with the grounding pressure of his touch, of the way it unravels all that tension, that sweetness slipping down my throat and ears full of a deep rumbly voice.

I don't realise I've managed to finish the mug until it droops in my hands, sleep teasing at the corner of my vision, the warmth tugging at my eyelids, prompting them to droop, until a hand catches it.

"Oh you finished it. Well done (Y/N)." another voice, lower, deeper. Smooth sweet warmth that tugs at me even more and the hand gently takes it from my lax grip.

"You can rest your eyes you know. Just keep listening as I speak." Yoongi prompts.

And my eyes flutter shut, encouraged by the way his voice continues even as I let my head droop, curling against the warmth of a solid chest, tucked close by hands drawing me against it. The press of lips across my temple and the light nuzzling that follows that leaves a sweet trail of mint behind.

Listen to Yoongi speak about the sort of things he wanted to, that he wanted me to join him when I felt up for it. I think my lips quirk, a droopy smile, eyes blinking blearily at a figure that blurs, sits with hands lightly brushing against my skin.

Body falling into a darkness that promises to protect, eyes falling shut and head coming to rest, still.

Sinking against cushions, captured and protected within the cradle of a firm warm body holding me.

And as sleep washes over me there's a final thought that remains.

That helps tip me over the edge and into that comforting abyss of sleep.

Not alone anymore.

And the hum of a low voice is the last thing I hear, indecipherable but comforting, nevertheless.

Far from alone.

And in that darkness the smell of sweet citrus remains, cords through it and winds around me. 

Enveloping me in it.

Holding me.

(THERE WE GO~ POST HEAT BABY FAWN IS JUST A JITTERY SHAKY MESS BUT SHE WANTS TO BE BRAVE EVEN IF IT HURTS!! BABY FAWN PROTECTION SQUAD RISE~ AND!! THE BOYS ARE JUST RARING TO GO!! IT'S BEEN FIVE WHOLE DAYS WITHOUT SIGHT OF HER SO OF COURSE THEY'RE WORRIED AND FRETTING, WANTING TO HELP IN EVERY WAY THEY CAN!! AND MINNIE DOESN'T MEAN TO STIFFEN, HE'S JUST A BIT ON EDGE AND THIS ENTIRE CHAPTER HE WAS. NOT. READY. TO. LET. GO. OF. HER. AND I CAN'T BLAME HIM!! SHE'S ALL JITTERY AND HURTING AND ACHING!! AND~ OH?? SHE LIKES SUGA'S VOICE EH? MAYHAPS HE DOESN'T KNOW SHE'S THE COMMENTOR BUT OF COURSE HE WAS GOING TO STICK CLOSE AND MASSAGE HER AS HE SPOKE, EASE AWAY HER ACHES AND HELP HER SLEEP! LOTS OF DOTING AND FUSSING TO CONTINUE NEXT CHAPTER! LET ME KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS, HOPE YOU ENJOYED AND TAKE CARE!!)

QUESTION...ANY PLANS YOU'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO? FELLOW LONDONERS...PLANS FOR WHEN LOCKDOWN EASES?

Mine is...gym (FITNESS VIBES HIT ME ALREADY!), shopping, beauty parlour. HAVE TO HAVE TO HAVE TO! I've needed to buy so many necessities and lots of stuff REGARDLESS, gonna go buy myself a birthday gift too! And~ dive for cuddles with my friends, it has been a solid...8 months since I actually got to hug them and we've got so much catching up to do. I miss them.

Borahae! 💜💜💜

PurpleQueenie <3