MY MIND REPEATS that night. The night I found those tapes.

I never got to finish Monica's tape, but now, I know I wouldn't have wanted to.

It makes me wonder. What did Jessie and Cassie do to him?

The bigger question is, how did Cassie get away?

***

"Hellooo?!" Cassie's in my face, giving me her same snippy tone.

I snap back into reality, abandoning my thoughts.

"How long are you gonna sit there and stare at me for?"

I didn't even realize, I wonder how long it had been.

"Shit, sorry." I push myself up to a sitting position and look her in the eyes. It's so weird to actually be seeing her, but maybe we came across each other for a reason. "Can I ask you something?"

"I don't see why not." She lays back on the wall to relax.

"It's just, um-" I struggle with my words, not sure which of my billions of questions I should ask her, if any. "See, I just wanted to know if-"

"If what?"

"Well, um, do you know Monica?" She looks down at her lap once she hears those words.

She chuckles. "Do I know Monica? Yeah, I fucking know Monica." I nod, not really sure what she means but I'll act like I do.

She notices my confusion and continues.

"Monica was my roommate in college. We we're best friends ever since. Me, her and our friend Jessie would hangout all the time. We were inseparable, even up until her death."

Oh my gosh, it makes sense. He tried to kill them off to make sure his tracks we're covered.

"So, did Jessie get away too?" She looks down at the floor and shakes her head.

Silence.

"Now it's my turn for a question. How did you know about him killing Jessie? Also.. why do you think I'd know Monica?"

"Oh, um. I don't know, it would be kind of weird to tell you." I try to walk away, but she grabs my wrist and drags me back down.

"Shit!" I scream, holding onto my fucked up wrist. It has now been slammed shut between a center console, and had chains dug into it til it bled. Now, this bitch is trying to rip it off. I really need some bandages.

She finally looks down at my wrist and looks mortified. "Oh god, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean-"

"You know what? Fine, there's tapes of you at Derek's. Tapes of all three of you guys being killed. Murdered. So there you go."

Her face says it all, absolutely stunned.

I stun myself with my own answer.

"Wait, you're here though?" I question.

"Ah, you're a smart one." She teases. I roll my eyes and slap her on the shoulder.

"No, I mean, what's on your tape then?"

She shrugs her shoulders, "I dunno, probably the part where I'm fighting to get away. I fought for a while. Maybe that turns him on." She laughs quietly.

"Shut up, that's not true. He has reasons."

"Sorry, forgot he was your soon-to-be-hubby. What do you like about this guy anyway?" She looks seriously concerned, but she doesn't know anything about our relationship. She wouldn't get it.

"I see his soft side, his real side, okay? You don't know anything about him." She laughs louder this time.

"I might not know much, but I know he's a psychopathic murderer, and that's basically all I need."

"He's not psychotic okay?! He does this stuff when there's a reason!"

I love him, but I don't know why I'm defending him. She's right, he's psychotic, and I know that. He'd murder anybody, but still, to me, he's more than that.

She stands up to my level now, "Oh, okay then miss-knows-everything, so there's a reason why he killed Jessie? Why he tried to kill me, yeah? Tell me how that all works out."

"He needed to cover his tracks from hurting Monica! Do you not know what she did to him? She killed their child!"

"She didn't mean to, okay?!"

At this point I'm fuming and my arms don't know what to do. First, they give her a little shove for the shit she's talking. Her arms make a comeback and push me harder, hard enough to make me fall backwards to the floor. When I fall my wrist is the first thing to help hold me up.

"Damn it!" I scream in pain, which doesn't faze her this time.

I get off from the floor and with my good hand I slap her across the face. I hear my rings collide with her nose ring, in unison with her little scream.

"What the fuck?!" She comes at me abruptly with a punch.

I didn't see any of this coming, and I wasn't prepared. I've never been punched before, but I didn't think it would hurt this fucking bad.

I go up to hold my cheek but she goes in for another one. And another one. And, even another one. I lay on the floor, focusing on my pain, because that's all I know in this second.

I feel her breath down my neck, as she lowers down in front of me.

"Don't fuck with me." She says to my ear, as she wipes the blood from my nose and shakes it off her finger, asserting her dominance I assume. I know this all too well.

I'm done being on the bottom. It's my turn.

I turn my face to meet her eyes, and her stupid little smile. I creep my hand behind her ear and yank her hair as hard as I can, having her join me on the floor.

Her forehead slams hard into the foot of the bed board, and the blood gushes out immediately.

She's still for a second, but with a snap of a finger she's a fucking animal. Her hands grasps the collar of my shirt, bringing me on the floor. She tries to get on top of me, but I beat her to it.

I reciprocate the bloody nose she gave me, but harder.

The whole floor below her is bloody, and she's starting to choke.

"Get.. the hell.. off of me!" She tries to get the words out, but I'm making it hard with my hands around her throat. Her eyes are slowly closing, and that's when I realize what I'm doing.

Why am I choking her?

Why am I trying to kill her?

I can't comprehend what my mind is doing.

This isn't me.

I release her and she turns on her side, coughing up large amounts of spit.

She crawls away from me as I sit in my thoughts.

I didn't even realize I was doing it. It came as an instinct. My thoughts are starting to scare me, but scaring me of myself.

"Makes sense." She pulls me out of my thoughts for the second time today. I honestly forgot she was here.

"Huh?"

"I didn't understand how anybody could be with that monster. Especially since you knew what he did to Monica. It makes sense. You're just fucking like him. You guys are perfect for each other." She laughs, rubbing the red mark I gave her, to soothe the pain.

"What?" She continues to torture me, "Got nothing to say?"

"Makes sense." Is all I can get out.

"Excuse me?"

"Monica was a monster, killed her own son, treated her husband like shit when she was the bad guy. You knew what she did, the monstrous thing she did, and you still defend her." I mock.

"You're just fucking like her."

All she can do is stare. Her anger rising, I can feel it. If smoke actually came out of ears, we'd be dead by the the amount of fumes filling the room by now.

"What, got nothing to say?" I bite my tongue, trying not to laugh.

She starts to jump on me again but I move to the side, dodging the hit. Instead, I I use my feet to trip her and her head slams right back into the foot of the bed board.

She can barely move. She tries, but can only manage inch at a time.

Maybe I should just accept myself.

I grab the hair on the back of her head and slam it back into the same spot.

I stare at her as blood fills the floor. The life behind her eyes slowly fading away.

"Hmm." I say aloud, "Derek'll be sad he didn't get to finish the tape."

I go and sit next to my spot by the window, staring out into the sky.

Maybe the sun isn't my best friend, because I'm my true self when the moon comes out.

***

Don't worry, I'll promise to stay in the dark where I belong.

***

hiii guys :)

Tell me your opinions on this chapter, I feel like my writings been sloppy lately so I need some insight.

Other than that, I want to ask if you guys expected this, but I'm pretty sure everybody did lmao.

What did you think ab Cassie though? Did we hate her, or was she alright?

Off topic: What are your guys' favorite songs/artists rn??

Off topic: Is it good weather where you're at rn?

Have a good day! <3

Love ya!

-Amanda <3