Veronica's POV

One week later

"Get in the car," Felix orders, and I just obey him. I know what he is capable of when he gets angry.

I sit next to him and he hands me a small plastic bag full of coke. He always makes sure I have cocaine.

"Where are we going-" I try to ask him but he cuts me off.

"Shut up," he spits angrily and I just look away.

After thirty minutes we arrive somewhere I never expected to be.

Shanice's house. Fuck.

"I'm going to stay-" He snatches my arm, pushing me outside.

The moment I stumble, I notice Dominic looking at me while he is chatting to some guys.

He gives me a worried look that I wish I could wipe away from his face. Not his business.

I walk near Felix as we enter and Dominic shortly follows us inside.

"Veronica!" Dominic yells and we both turn around, although Felix seems quite irritated.

"Where is Alexander?" Felix asks with his fists clenched and I get slightly worried. Is that why we came here?

Dominic seems taken back by his question and just shrugs.

Felix walks away. I know he is gonna stir trouble.

"I can't believe you still didn't go home but you are with this idiot," Dominic scolds me and I roll my eyes.

"I can't believe you are still stupid enough to think I care," I bluntly say and he laughs which surprises me.

"You really think this works with me?" He seems amused and I roll my eyes. "Maybe everyone else believes this tough, self-destructive attitude, but I don't," he admits and I ignore him.

That's not the point. I don't want to be tough, I just simply don't want anyone in my business.

I walk away, looking for a good room in which I could chill and snort cocaine for a bit until Felix is done with whatever he came here for.

This house is way too big and there is always a free room, hopefully, I don't enter the wrong one like I usually do.

I slowly walk into a random room and luckily there is no one inside.

I take the plastic bag out of my pocket but I drop it on the floor by mistake.

Luckily, it wasn't open.

If I ask Felix for more coke, I also have to give him more sex.

I bend down looking for it, and before I realize it, the door shuts closed behind me which makes me wince.

I look at the door and my mouth falls to the floor. I try to not make any noise but I am beyond shocked.

Shanice is kissing a girl I have never seen before right against the door as if they couldn't wait any longer and I panic, I shouldn't be here.

If I just hide under the bed and wait for them- Oh, God, no. I never knew she liked women or anyone in general.

I hear their steps closer to the bed and I accidentally hit my toes against the bedside table and I let out a groan which I immediately cover with my hands, terrified.

They both turn to me and I slowly stand up while my cheeks are flushing red.

I know I shouldn't have seen this.

Shanice looks at me horrified and ashamed, it's not the first time I invade her privacy but this time it feels like it's important to her. Important enough to hide it.

"I'm so- sorry!" I murmur and the other girl just walks out of the room giggling while Shanice looks after her.

"Please, don't tell anyone." Shanice walks to me and I can't believe what I just heard. Shanice is actually embarrassed?

There is nothing to be ashamed of. I just regret being the one to find out.

"I won't."

"I'm not... like this. I don't know what happened," she admits and I look at her confused.

"There is nothing wrong about it," I reassure her.

"It is. I'm literally everything my parents stand against. No wonder they left me alone," she mutters and I feel sad for her, surprisingly. Does Derek know about this since they are so close?

"You are the only one to know about this, apart from that girl-" She stops as her cheeks turn redder.

"I won't tell anyone," I repeat and she doesn't seem to believe me but lets it slide, and she leaves the room.

I go back to my coke, shocked, but I still pour it on the desk, chopping it. I became way too good at this.

I still can't stop thinking about Shanice. I feel like I've been too harsh to her.

I pinch one nostril and snort the first line deeply, now I need to do several lines to feel anything. I just know I'm getting worse but I don't care enough to stop myself.

I do the second line straight after and I start tearing up involuntarily. This has never happened before.

I wipe it away with my sleeves and lay down on the bed, waiting for Felix to call me when he is done.

I get up after several minutes, I snort the third line and I dance around to the loud music.

Letting it transport me into a world where nothing matters, nothing hurts me anymore.

I sing along to the song, careless and I accidentally stumble against the table corner.

"Fuck this shit," I cuss at it and I continue dancing for what feels like ages.

I decide to leave the room and as soon as I step foot outside, I see James making out with Olivia.

I wish I could say I didn't expect this, but I do, from both of them.

I'm not even sure if Nicole hangs out with him anymore? But if she does, she is a fucking idiot.

My mouth opens before I even think of what I'm about to say.

"Congrats. The bitch and the cheater." I clap and they stop making out, turning to me, annoyed.

"Perfect couple." I laugh bitterly. I'm not jealous, I'm definitely not jealous of Olivia screwing Derek.

I wonder where Derek- no, fuck it.

"Are you that jealous of me?" Olivia mocks me and I laugh while taking a second look at James.

He seems irritated, like the usual.

"Babe, James is settling for you," I say while giving her a fake smile. He wanted to fuck me, he never got to do it and he hates being rejected because he isn't used to it.

She walks to me, crossing her arms while leaving James standing there like an idiot.

"Oh, by the way, Derek is SO good in bed," she puts emphasis on his name and I hate how it makes me feel. I don't want to care, but I do.

I want to show her that I don't care but she smirks the second she notices my mood changing. She knows very well how much I care about Derek, and she enjoys hurting me for whatever reason.

"I'll tell Nicole about it." I try to switch the subject but James laughs at me.

"Go ahead. By the way, your little slutty friend is fucking Derek behind your back," he spits and I look at him shocked. I don't believe him. It can't be true.

She would never do this to me, not after I told her how I feel about Derek.

"You are lying," I struggle to talk as my lower lip starts shaking.

He walks next to Olivia and they both laugh in my face.

"You are so useless, Ronny," they mock me and I look away. Why am I allowing them to treat me this way?

I walk away, struggling to stop the tears from falling. I don't want to cry. They are lying.

I don't expect anything from Derek but could Nicole ever hurt me so deeply after I told her how I feel about him? I know she is way too in love with James.

But what if that was her revenge on him? She could have picked anyone else.

I'm rambling too much, it cannot be true. Derek always claimed to care about me, if he is fucking my friend... he is- he is a liar, a fucking liar.

"Gosh. I hate him!" I murmur and I look down.

And the worst thing is that I feel like I don't have the right to hate him because it's all my fault.

Where the hell is Felix? I want to go home- his house.

I can't live like this, I need to know if it's true. So I go looking for the only person I know who would tell me the truth.

I enter almost every room looking for Dominic, and the moment I get to Derek's room—which I wish I didn't have to enter—I don't even bother knocking, I straight up open the door as I hear some groaning noises inside.

The first thing I notice is Alexander laying on the floor while Felix keeps trying to hit him but Derek and Dominic are trying to stop him.

Alexander looks horribly bruised and bleeding everywhere while Felix is barely injured.

"You didn't get this shit done, I told you this was going to happen, Derek," Felix spits and he lets go of Alexander, whose nose is bleeding like crazy.

I stare in disbelief as I try to walk towards Felix, calming him down but he snatches his arm out of my hold which hurts me. I have bruises from the cigarettes all over my arms. I've only done some yesterday.

"Veronica, go home. Call a cab, whatever. Just go home," Dominic tells me and I shake my head while he stares at me annoyed.

"I'll talk to him, take her home," Dominic says to Derek and he comes to grab me, without even bothering to ask me before.

I try to free myself from his hold but it's too tight and I just resort to insults.

"Let me go, you fucking idiot," I hiss at Derek but he ignores me as he pulls me out of the crowded house into the backyard.

I try to push him away but he is stronger and it just hurts me more, especially because my scars are burning and opening, which might make them bleed again.

"Please, let me go," I say and he turns to me, disappointed.

"Just do what I say," he pleads and I roll my eyes.

"I don't want to go home." We stop by his car as he relaxes the grip on my arm.

I try to run away but he grabs my arm again which makes me groan in pain.

I can feel the burns slightly bleeding and I try my best to calm down before he notices the blood patches through the hoodie.

He looks at me worried and confused while I try to ignore him.

"Let me go," I say through gritted teeth and he shakes his head.

"I'll drive you home. To your mom."

"Don't fucking act like you give a shit about me, Gosh. You're a liar!" I scream out at him without even thinking about what I'm saying. It is the cocaine and the pain combined, for sure.

I can't believe how stupid I sound right now.

"A liar? When all I did these months is be honest with you?" he says, pretending to be hurt by my words. What a fucking idiot.

I laugh bitterly and he finally lets go of the hold, I should just walk away before I embarrass myself more.

"Honest, huh. We have different opinions of what being honest is," I say bitterly while I look down at my arm, noticing some blood coming through but I immediately look away so he doesn't notice.

"I have never lied to you," he says calmly and I look deeply into his warm blue eyes.

"You fucked Nicole and Olivia! Then you come to me talking about how you care about me, at least don't lie about it," I say as I feel my corners watering up but I blink fast to stop the tears, I don't want to cry in front of him.

He looks at me confused and I just want to leave. He is faking it, I know.

"Nicole?" he asks confused and I roll my eyes.

Derek comes closer to me, way too close, and that's when I notice he drank a bit of alcohol.

"Don't you love how much of a hypocrite you are? You slept with all my friends and I still care about you," he admits and I widen my eyes in surprise.

"So you admit you slept with Nicole?!" I say ignoring everything else he said because I know he is partially right. He was only kind of friends with Alex... Felix doesn't count, right?

But I never lied to him that I care about him, I never gave him false hope, if he thought otherwise it never had anything to do with my words.

"For God's sake, no," he replies exhausted and I look at my feet.

"I think the only liar here is you, this is exactly why you are accusing me," he says irritated and I look up again.

"Not only you lied about not giving a fuck about me but then you were never honest with me- I never expected you to be, but don't fucking come here accusing me," he says with an aggressive tone in his voice that I never heard before which shocks me.

I turn around, almost leaving him but he grabs my arm which makes me wince in pain, fuck. He will see it.

"Why can't you just admit it? You are jealous," he asks me and I look away, ignoring him.

"Let go of my arm," I spit and he lets go of my arm but gently takes my hand instead.

"I will once you reply to me," he says as he comes closer to me and I roll my eyes.

"I don't want to," I simply mutter and he completely closes the gap between us.

"I want to understand you," he whispers and I get chills down my spine. I hate and love being so close to him at the same time.

I make the great mistake of looking into his eyes because every time I do my legs turn to jelly.

He tugs a strand of my hair behind my ear as I stare at him in disbelief. It's the cocaine, it's not me. He is drunk too.

"I don't know what you want me to admit-"

"Stop lying to yourself, to me." He interrupts me and I let out a sigh while we are one inch away from each other's faces.

"I'm not lying to-" He cuts me off by pressing his lips against mine which takes me completely off guard before I even realize what is happening.

Time feels like it stops the moment our lips meet each other's, and I can swear I feel the whole damn zoo in my stomach.

My heart is pounding so hard that it's almost jumping out of my chest and his seems to be the same. If he wasn't holding my face I would have fainted, that's how weak my knees feel.

Derek's soft lips are everything I ever wanted and it feels like I've been dreaming of this for way too long, longer than I want to admit. I just give in.

I part my lips slightly as I let him enter my mouth and the raw emotion behind it is making me want to pull him closer to me, as much as I can, despite my arm still hurting.

His hands moving to my neck, slowly putting pressure on it which makes me skip a beat as I also wrap my arms around him, which deepens our kiss.

His tongue explores my mouth with such arduous passion I have never felt before, it's addicting and I don't think we can let go of each other.

I feel as if all my worries are gone and the moment he slowly breaks the kiss I'm left confused and eager to keep going.

We are both breathless as we deeply look into each other's eyes and I cannot look away. I want more.

The moment we catch a breath I pull him in again. He seems surprised about it. Now we are fully making out, while my hands are traveling to his back, passionately caressing it.

He doesn't shy away as he slowly lowers his big hands to my waist, his arm fully wrapped around my figure.

It's so intense I let almost all of my body weight on his, taking his cologne all in. This is the kind of scent I want to get used to, every day for the rest of my life.

We finally pull away and that's the moment I notice my eyes are slightly wet, he gives me a big smile and I can't help but do the same, while still caressing his strong back.

———

The longest chapter and the best one so far. Only because they finally kissed, lol. I love y'all.
I can't believe I got butterflies when she pulled him in again.

Regarding Shanice's bisexuality, I had it planned since I started thinking about the book three years ago. She is one of the original cast and she was always meant to be bisexual.

Fun fact: Dominic was invented on the spot!

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