the cold bit at renjun's uncovered ears. he shivered and but down on his bottom lip, readjusting his scarf before stuffing his hands back into his pockets. "it's too fucking cold," he gritted out through clenched teeth.

   "i know," jeno spoke up beside him. "but it's supposed to snow today and you know you'll regret it if you don't come with me," he said. renjun sighed in defeat knowing that  there was no going back. they were already more than halfway there anyway, it would be pointless to turn back now.

   the two boys made light conversation until they arrived at the park that held so many memories. "huh," renjun breathed, "i haven't been here for ages." jeno prepared to answer when he noticed renjun had walked off by himself. he spun around and scanned the area until he saw renjun at a bench with his fingers stretched out to the arm rest. 

   his eyes softened as he continued watching renjun. the chinese male brushed off dead leaves from the seat and sat down, bringing his cold fingers to his lap and intertwining them together. "this is the place," he mumbled to himself. 

"it happened again."

   the doctor hummed, scribbling down with her pen. "tell me about it with more deatails," she advised. renjun was at his weekly psychiatrist session to help restore his memories. jeno always came with him as he had felt more safe and reassured with him there.

   this time though, he requested jeno sit outside in the waiting room. something didn't feel right about having jeno listening in on it. while jeno had been a bit confused with the request at first, he agreed and did it without questioning his actions.

   "it was while i was still in highschool. my last year before graduating i think," he squeazed his shut as if to remember the dream that he was describing better. "i was sitting at a bench in a park where i used to live. i remember going there alone one day after school. then a boy appeared next to me and asked if the seat beside me was taken," he bit his lip in frustration, trying to recall each thing that happened.

   "but... i don't know who they are. i can't see their face.. it's covered with something... a flower i think."

   "alright renjun. take a deep breath and slow down," she smiled, "there's no rush." her words were nice, but to renjun it wasn't important. he was frusterated and wanted to tear his hair out for the feeling of having scattered memories which was supposed just a dream.

   in his dream, the figure had a warm aura that he was drawn to. even though renjun couldn't see their face, he knew they had a nice smile. he simply liked everything about them. in the dream he had vividly held a short but sweet conversation with them. now, the memory of it was thin and almost completely gone like a wisp of smoke. he remembered trying to share gummies that he bought from a convenient store in the dream, but the other had kindly refused. he could almost hear their voice saying, "no thanks, i'm not a big fan of strawberry."

   "renjun ssi?" the voice of his doctor called, snapping him out of his thoughts. "anything else?" the chinese male held his breath,

"no, that's all."

   sitting on the same bench that was in his dream, when renjun turned to his side, he could almost feel their presence. just as he began telling himself that it was probably just jeno, he looked up and saw little white flakes falling down slowly.

   he reached out his hand and little bits of snow melted in his hand. "the first snow of the year," he spoke to himself quietly. "jeno, it's sno—," renjun tried to call before freezing.

"uhm, is this seat taken?"

-----

word count: 643

i had a long, planned out ending for this book, but i'm lazy and inconsistent so i apologize for shortening it instead

i plan to wrap this book up soon

✎ ---- dreaminghyuck⤾