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24. 'fair warning'

IMESSAGE GROUP CHAT
ASS-VENGERS ASSEMBLE 🍑
big daddy [robert]
peachy keen [chris]
spoiler alert [mark]
scarface [scarlett]
hemmy montemmy [hemsworth]
downey village reject [seb]
hair gel [tom]
choclachino [mackie]
jerbear [jeremy]
scarlet bitch [lizzie]

peachy keen
so a lil birdy tells me that lil downey is visiting set this week?

scarlet bitch

big daddy
my god

she's my daughter and even i'm not THAT excited to see her

take it down a notch pls

scarlet bitch
affirmative mr stark sir

choclachino
i wonder how hair gel's feeling about this sitch

downey village reject
enlighten us billy elliott 🤔

spoiler alert
c'mon guys don't be too hard on the kid

big daddy
but it's so fun!!

hair gel
well now that i'm not at risk of rejection

or at least i hope i'm not

i'm pretty excited 😁

big daddy
oh god i've wingmanned the kid with my own daughter haven't i

jerbear
big mistake

hemmy montemmy

as if that's your president

scarface
my god don't remind me 😕

big daddy

spoiler alert
did you just use a gif of yourself?

big daddy
yeah i can do that

didn't you know??

choclachino
so you kissed her yet twinkle toes??

downey village reject
oooh fun game!!

peachy keen
guys leave the kid alone!!

...but have you?

hair gel
guys this is bullying

choclachino
so you hAVE

downey village reject
kid fair warning

that told us all we needed to know

choclachino
she laid it on you early, huh?😏

hair gel
not exactly..

jerbear
you made the first move??

oh kid

downey village reject
this just got TEN TIMES BETTER

choclachino
me and seb right now

i told you we'd get you spidey!!!

peachy keen

big daddy
only i can do that evans move along

so kid

you're meaning to tell me you kissed my oldest daughter? like you moved in on her first?

hair gel
i'm sorry sir

does this mean i'm off the movie??

should i cancel my flight?

choclachino
my god i hope so

downey village reject

spoiler alert
chill out man she's 20

she can make her own decisions, right rob??

jerbear
c'mon rob it's not like you didn't know this was coming

big daddy
well you guys are gonna say that your kids are still short and annoying

mine's awesome

hair gel
flight?

movie?

someone help me pls

scarface
all right guys knock it off🙄

deep breaths honey

they're adults guys they can do whatever they want!!

big daddy
well you have a point i guess

i mean it's minuscule but if you guys insist

you're not off the movie kid

hair gel
thank GOD

choclachino
aw NO

downey village reject

spoiler alert
atta boy

big daddy
besides

they've shot too much of you it'd be a lot of work to cut you out

but if any and i mean ANY pda occurs in downey village this week i will expel you from the avengers

hair gel
expel me?

big daddy
you've been warned

hemmy montemmy
now that's over

lunch??

_______________________________

Liked by tomholland2013, rebelwilson, robertdowneyjr and 11,304,293 others
cash: today's the day folks. this franchise started out with a group of awesome nerds who just wanted to make mouth music together. today is the last call for all you pitches out there that have made it something special. we love you all, and we will forever be a family. this is emily junk, signing off from pitch perfect 3. oh and btw i've cried three times today and rebelwilson laughed at me every. single. time. i love my aca-bitches ✨🎤
tagged: pitchperfect3

View all 302,395 comments

username: why am i crying

username: emo cash makes me cry omg

rebelwilson: oh pitch now you're gonna make me cry 😢✨
|
lizthepope: more like you'll be crying after i whoop your ass at the premiere you complete dis-aca-ppointment 🤷🏻‍♀️

username: oof liz

annakendrick47: really cash you just had to go and make me cry you PITCH
|
cash: annakendrick47 makes a nice change from it always being me🤪

username: i can't believe it's all over

username: the end of an aca-era
|
cash: username truly💜

andybovine: oh god my eyes are sweating what is happening

username: bellas for life 💜

username: this all has me so emo

tomholland2013: emily junk is my favourite pitch, don't cry downey ✨
|
lizthepope: tomholland2013 okay we get it you like her junk let's keep it pg pls
|
robertdowneyjr: lizthepope tomholland2013 yes lets

username: she got that junk in dat trunk

cash: can y'all blame him though 🍑
|
robertdowneyjr: i think i just threw up a little

_______________________________

PRIVATE CONVERSATION
INSTAGRAM
cash
shanevoss

shanevoss
hey cash long time no see

cash
am i stupid or did we not break up six months ago??

and didn't you move on like two weeks after?

shanevoss
well i can't say i've missed your constant pessimism in my life

and what i do is none of your business considering you've moved on with spiderboy

cash
it's spiderMAN

and he's more of a man than you ever were

shanevoss
oh cash you're breaking my heart! 😰

cash
that can't be true

you don't have a heart

what do you want shane??

shanevoss
i'm actually here to give you fair warning

tomorrow my album comes out and there is a particular song that i don't think you're gonna like

well there are quite a few songs you probably won't like but oh well 😏

cash
wow you finally finished writing your pitty party album??

the 'i cheated on my girlfriend a zillion times and now i wanna make her feel bad about it' album?

shanevoss
well actually it's just a title album but wow i should've thought about that one sooner!!

what a shame

cash
urgh

so you're here to tell me that you've decided to create an album full of lies that you're dropping tomorrow

can't hear you over my grammy

shanevoss
the grammy where i held your hand while you accepted?

oh yeah

cash
get out of my life

i'm finally happy and now you pop up

i swear you're like a bad penny

shanevoss
well just remember that i was the one that gave you fair warning

you might wanna ring your publicist

bye cash have fun with spiderboy 🤗

cash
you're sure a pathetic jerk

but remember

karma always comes back around

shanevoss
sorry i can't hear you over the voice of my new girlfriend

better get back to her

cash
you're disgusting

shanevoss
love you too

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